


Well, Bless Your Heart

by InBoccaAlLupo, Razbrylimedragons



Category: Game of Thrones (TV), game of thrones
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern: No Powers, F/M, Jonerys, Jonisastark
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-21
Updated: 2018-02-19
Packaged: 2019-01-01 04:22:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 24
Words: 100,743
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12148527
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InBoccaAlLupo/pseuds/InBoccaAlLupo, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Razbrylimedragons/pseuds/Razbrylimedragons
Summary: Updated Summary:Jon and Dany's love story is one they can't avoid, no matter the cost. What happens when the greatest love story of their lives begins under the least noble of terms? Who will they hurt and how will it affect them?Spoiler: Hugely flawed humans coming at you.Eventual endgame: Jonerys





	1. Chapter 1

“So this is your favorite bar in all of Boston?” Ygritte smirked into Jon’s shoulder while tugging down on their intertwined hands.

He gave a firm squeeze back before looking down at her and rolling his eyes playfully. “You’re in my town not a full two hours and already judging the establishments?”

She bit her lip, “I’ll make a judgement on an establishment when you take me to one,” she winked.

“We’ll see if your tune changes after a guinness or two.”

A raised eyebrow, half smile, and head cocked slightly to the left was the affirmation he needed to detangle his hand from hers and make his way to the bar and place their drink order.

“Jon!” A hand slapped across his back as another reached for his in greeting, “glad you finally decided to join us! We were able to snag one of the high top booths in the back. Living like royalty tonight! Where’s this lady you’ve been telling us about?”

“You’ve been calling me a lady to your friends have you?” Ygritte teased with a smile and a quick jab of her elbow to Jon, “I’m Ygritte, I’m too good for him, but I haven’t realized it yet.” She smiled and extended her hand.

“Pyp,” the man said, extending his left hand to hers while covering his right to his heart; a look of awe crossing his face. “Jesus, Jon, how in the world did you land this one?”

Jon turned, handing Ygritte her drink, “got her as a freshman before she knew any better.” He signed the slip for their drinks and placed his wallet in his pocket. “Is Sam here?” He asked looking to the back.

“Yes,” Pyp turned, pointing to the back of the crowded bar “he’s holding down the fort. I’m sneaking out for a quick smoke and to grab another round.” A look of feigned shock crossed his face, “oh no, you just got drinks! Looks like you’ll be sitting my round out then!” He winked and made his way to the door.

Jon took a sip, rolled his eyes, and gestured for Ygritte to follow him as he made his way in the direction Pyp had pointed.

“Well, look who finally made it to Boston!” Ygritte smiled and moved around Jon to give a hug to Sam. “How long are you in town for?”

“Just until Sunday, I’m taking the train back.” She stated, placing her drink on the table and removing her jacket. “I can’t believe how warm it is for this time of year!” She slid into the booth.

“I’ll take this over last winter.” Jon muttered grudgingly as he slid next to her, placing a hand on the small of her back and rubbing it absentmindedly. “You’re lucky you were abroad. It was hell. I’ve never seen so much snow in my life. The trains were a complete mess.” He took a long sip of his drink.

“Ohh poor thing, did you have to shovel out your car all on your own? Must’ve been a real pain not having a driveway that just magically got cleaned for you!” She chuckled to herself as she took another sip of her beer.

Jon scowled, “actually, you have no idea how hard. Need I remind you that my parents refused to pay for a membership at the yacht club and forced us to take sailing lessons at the public sailing club?” Despite the words, his tone gave away his thinly veiled facetiousness. 

Ygritte wrapped her hand around his back and leaned into him, smiling, “I love it when get to witness your bi-annual joke!” He leaned his head to her as she turned to him; their foreheads grazed and their noses touched. Their eyes met and they gave each other a knowing smile.

“Well, glad to see you two are as in love as ever,” Sam stated awkwardly.

“Alright, since red and I are best friends now,” Pyp started as he made his way to the table balancing four full pints of guinness, “I decided to do the gentlemanly thing and forgo the traditional rules of round-buying, and grab you both second drink.” He placed the four glasses carefully on the table, liquid spilling over the sides of each, despite the effort.

“So red, was Jon as outgoing at school as he is here?” he chuckled at his own joke as he reached for the fullest glass. “I can tell you, the ladies in London just swooned over his charm.”

Jon rolled his eyes and finished the rest of his first drink before reaching for a second. Ygritte squeezed his thigh and looked across the table, “has anyone ever found you as funny as you find yourself, Pyp?”

“A girl who answers a question with a question; this girl’s a keepah my friend!” Pyp drawled out in his best Boston accent and raised his glass to Ygritte. She smiled, clinked hers with his, and finished the rest of her first drink.

The conversation was easy, the drinks were cheap, and the food was palatable. Whatever misgivings Ygritte had upon entering the bar were abandoned by the time the fourth guinness was placed in front of her.

When it came time for a fifth drink, she tried to insist on paying, only to be shot down by all three men at the table. She decided to let them fight over who’d have the honor of buying her drink while she excused herself to the bathroom.

It was only as she washed her hands that she caught a glimpse of her reflection in the mirror. Her eyes were glassy and her cheeks tinted pink. She took a minute to splash some cold water on her face in an attempt to regain her composure. “And I was supposed to be taking it easy tonight,” she thought as she dried her hands and face and left the bathroom.

As she made her way back to the table, she noticed the two occupants to be Jon and Sam and raised her eyebrows in question as she took her seat back next to Jon.

“Pyp agreed to get the drinks since he had to get up for a smoke anyway.” Sam offered with a smile.

“I never thought I’d be grateful for the habit he picked up abroad, but here’s to it!” Jon said cheerily as he raised his almost empty glass to the middle of the table.

As they clinked glasses, Jon gave a sideways glance to Ygritte and awarded her with a sloppy smile. “You look about as drunk as I do,” she said as she dramatically leaned her head onto his shoulder looking at him sideways. In all honesty, he may’ve been drunker than she was. She was still in the middle of her senior year in college, often drinking four nights a week. He was coming up on a year at his highly demanding job and, based on what he told her, had little time for nights out on weekends, let alone weeknights. 

He shrugged, “I guess you’re a bad influence on me, then.”

She laughed to herself; she had missed him so much. She was already dreading their goodbyes on Sunday. This was what always happened. Things were perfect when they were together; then parting was horrific. The excitement of seeing him again was what kept her going when they were apart, but when they were together all she could think about was their inevitable goodbye. Was this normal? She sighed. She’d definitely already had too much to drink.

“So, Sam,” she began after an extended silence, “what’s going on with your crew from school? I feel like all of you were thick as thieves and now you’re the only one I hear Jon talk about.”

“We all talk here and there, trying to plan a weekend to the casino this summer with the guys.” Sam mumbled quickly, “we’ve all been a bit busy and scattered. I’ve been studying for the MCATs, this is actually my first weekend off in a while too. You picked a good weekend to be in town.” He took a sip. Then added as an afterthought, “despite the unseasonable warmth, of course.”

She nodded, “well that’s exciting, Sam! Any thoughts on where you’ll be headed for Med-School?”

“I’m not quite sure yet. I’d love to stay in Boston with all the teaching schools and affiliated hospitals, but New York has some great programs and schools as well.”

“Any school would be lucky to have you!” She smiled at him, genuinely.

“Thanks, Ygritte.”

“Is anyone from your college group in New York?”

Sam paused thoughtfully, “I’m sure there’s someone I could look up.” He took a sip. “Where is Pyp with those drinks?”

Ygritte thought for a minute, “no, there’s got to be someone.” She looked and Jon, “wasn’t there?”

“I talk to four people from school, two of whom are at this table.” he said looking around for Pyp.

“Wait!” Ygritte suddenly recalled, “What about Daenerys?” Ygritte thought she felt Jon tense beside her and looked at him curiously. “Didn’t she go to grad school there?”

“She might have.” Jon said, noncommittally.

“Might have? She did or she didn’t, Jon? Big help.” Ygritte rolled her eyes annoyed and pulled out her phone. “Hang on, I’ll check Facebook.”

“Do we have to do this now?” Jon asked, a slight edge to his voice.

“Yes. And why do you care?”

“I’d rather be hanging out than on my phone.” he said reaching for her device, but she out maneuvered him.

“Good thing it’s my phone!” She said, amused.

“Ygritte,” he whined.

“Ok. She looked up from the phone to meet Sam’s eyes. Yes. She’s studying at Fordham.” Her gaze returned to the device then back to Jon. “Interesting.” She said as she raised an eyebrow and looked at Jon.

“What?” he asked as he moved to her.

“Of the fifteen mutual friends I have in common with her, you, lovely boyfriend, are no longer one of them.” Ygritte’s smile faded as she saw Jon seemingly relax.

Brushing the gnawing feeling in her stomach aside, she asked “what happened to make that happen?” 

“I have no idea, she probably preened her friends list when she left college.”

Ygritte shook her head, “no way. I only know her through you. What did you do? Did you make a fool of yourself after senior week?” She was teasing again. Most of the time he was shy, but there were a few rare occasions when he’d drink just enough to embarrass himself and not remember.

He leaned on the table and put his head in his hands, “ugh. I really don’t know. Can we please stop talking about this?”

“Stop talking about what?” Pyp asked, staggering over clearly more drunk than he’d been when he left, “hope you didn’t miss me too much, the Jack Daniels girls are here and talked me into doing a couple shooters by the bar.” He’d, miraculously still been able to wield four full pints over to the table. “Here you are, lady and gents!”

Jon graciously took his guinness and took a heavy sip.

“So, why are we making Jon uncomfortable?” Pyp asked Ygritte.

“We were talking about what happened between him and Daenerys and it makes him uncomfortable.” Ygritte stated matter of factly. 

“You know about that?” Pyp asked incredulously, “Wow he doesn’t deserve you.”

“PYP!” Both Jon and Sam exclaimed simultaneously.

Ygritte slid out of the booth to stand. “Ok, what exactly am I missing here.” She paused, she could hear the shake in her own voice. “What don’t I know?” She looked at Jon, “what don’t you want me to know?”

Jon, who’d suddenly taken an interest in playing with the discarded paper from a straw inhaled deeply and looked up, “Ygritte, I—“ 

Sam interrupted, “Jon and Daenerys hooked up freshman year.”

Ygritte’s head cut sharply to Sam, “what?”

“I’m sorry, Jon. You should’ve told her.” Sam started, looking at Jon, then moving to stare at Ygritte, “Jon’s felt guilty for years for not telling you. Trust me, as his roommate I haven’t heard the end of it. It was our first week at school and they were both very drunk.”

“Sam.” Jon attempted to interject.

Sam continued, “they didn't exchange contact information and didn’t see each other until second semester in Applied Shakespeare; by that time Daenerys was dating that guy Drogo. They had a laugh about their first meeting and became friends.”

Ygritte relaxed, “that’s all it was?”

“It was a year before you were even at school,” Sam stated.

Ygritte felt relief, she’d known Jon for over four years now. She’d been to his family’s house for holidays and to his family’s cape house for weeks at a time in the summer. His sister Sansa was like a sister to her. His mother called her on occasion to check in. He was a good guy, she trusted him. He was the one who’d been trying to get her to visit from school. He texted her more than she texted him.

He talked about their future together.

And yet…

Jon was looking down again.

“Why’d she delete you from Facebook four years later?”

He was still looking down.

He took a deep breath.

“Jon?”

A hiccup from Pyp broke the silence and something clicked in Ygritte’s mind at that moment.

“Pyp,” she looked at him, her hands shaking and her heart beat fast, “how exactly did it come up to you that Jon and Daenerys had a one night stand freshman year of college?”

Pyp looked at her through heavy eyes and slouched onto the bench “who knows how these things come up,” was all he could manage.

Ygritte looked from Pyp, to Sam, and over to Jon. “Could it be that while you were abroad in London, with Jon and Daenerys, that Jon and Daenerys had rediscovered whatever it was that happened between them freshman year?” As the question rolled off her tongue, her eyes were square on Jon.

When he finally managed to move his eyes up from the table, the look on his face was confirmation enough.

She couldn’t breathe. She thought she was going to throw up.

She looked down at her feet. Why had she chosen to wear her winter boots? She should’ve looked at the weather before she’d gotten on the train this afternoon.

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Willing this to be a bad dream.

She opened her eyes to a blurrier view of the same scene and tears on her cheeks.

She opened her mouth to speak, “…I….” she had no words.

She reached for her jacket and her purse and walked hastily out of the bar.

It wasn’t until she was outside that Ygritte realized she didn’t know where she was going. She turned left and started walking, then stopped, turned around and started walking, then stopped and stood for a minute directionless.

“Ygritte,” she recognized Jon’s voice behind her but somehow it sounded completely foreign. “Ygritte, please talk to me.”

She didn’t move forward, she didn’t turn around, she didn’t know what to do.

“Ygritte,” he breathed, “I’m sorry. I…” he trailed off.

She whirled around.

“You’re sorry.” she accused. “You’re sorry?”

He’d hit a nerve.

“Tell me, if this hadn’t come up tonight, would you ever have told me?”

He took a step closer, she took two steps back and put her hand out imploring him to keep his distance. He obeyed.

“Answer me!”

“I love you.”

“That’s not an answer.”

“I wanted to,” his shoulders slumped, “I’ve never been more ashamed of anything in my life.”

“Why?”

“I’ve wondered that a hundred thousand times.”

“Was there anyone else?”

He stepped forward again, “no! Never, of course not.”

Fresh tears welled in her eyes. “Who are you?” she paused, “I trusted you. I love you. I love your family. I would have sooner believed you slept naked in a bed with a woman. I….” she didn’t know what else to say.

He chanced another step and when she didn’t move away, he pulled her into an embrace. “Ygritte, what Sam said is true. I have hated myself every day.”

A sob wracked her body as her arms went around him and squeezed tightly; quickly, and let go. She stepped back.

“You played me for a fool, Jon.”

“No, Ygritte, never.”

“You lied to me, for years. There was a secret that how many were in on?”

“I…I can’t make an excuse. But of all the mistakes I’ve made, this is the biggest.”

“But it wasn’t once.”

Silence, again.

“How many times?”

“What?”

“How many times did you make that particular mistake?”

“Ygritte, there’s no point in—“

“No point in what, admitting that it wasn’t a one time thing? How many times in London did you fuck Daenerys?” She challenged, “did you lose track?”

He looked down again.

“Oh my god, there’s more?” she shook her head, “of course there’s more. Did you have sex in my dorm?”

“No, of course not.”

“Oh, of course not.” She mocked, “Well, what then. Enough with these half truths. I want to know it all. When was the first time and when was the last time?”

“The first time was as Sam said, Freshman year.”

“And the last?” she crossed her arms.

He sighed and closed his eyes, “senior year.”

“Asshole.”

“Yes.” he lacked any defense

“Freshman year once. Your sophomore year?”

“No!” He affirmed defensively.

“The beginning of our relationship, how chivalrous of you.” she seethed. “Junior year abroad in London, second semester when you were back?”

“Only once.”

“Didn’t keep track in London but you did keep track here. Of course…”

“We didn’t mean…” He stopped, realizing the error in his words.

“Didn’t mean to in London, but did here?” Her voice was raising, “where was I the weekend you slept with her at home? Was I away?” Her tone was accusing but she was almost certain she was right.

“Yes,” he closed his eyes and ran his index finger and thumb over the bridge of his nose, “Ygritte, let’s go back to my apartment and finish this, please. People are starting to—“

“Starting to what? Am I embarrassing you?”

“No, that’s not what I meant…”

“How many times senior year?”

“Ygritte…”

“How many times.”

“I don’t know!” he snapped. It was the first time his voice had raised all night, “it was when you were abroad in Italy, ok? Is that what you want to hear? God dammit. Do you think I am proud of this? Of any of this? I went to confession after every time, but it didn’t make it stop.”

“Well, bless your heart.”

“That’s not what I meant and you know it.”

“Did you love her?” Say no, the silent prayer from the back of her mind.

“What the fuck kind of question is that?”

It’s a question my boyfriend should be able to answer. She laughed. “My boyfriend, who up until about half an hour ago I was certain I was going to marry. Who was inside of me five hours ago, who’s the only person who’s ever been inside of me, tells me he had a years long relationship with a mutual friend of ours and it’s absurd of me to ask if he loved her?”

“What do you want me to say? What do you want me to do?”

I want you to say you never loved her, she thought. But she said, “I want you to be the person I thought you were an hour ago,” with that she turned and began walking away from him.

“Ygritte, please don’t walk away like this.”

“Why? Afraid I’ll turn my back too long and you’ll fall into Deanerys?”

“That’s not fair.”

“To whom?”

“Look, it’s late. We’ve been drinking. You’re in an unfamiliar city. At the very least, come stay at my place.” He hustled to keep pace astride her.

“No.” She said it without even looking at him.

“I’ll sleep on the couch, you can have the bed. Or you can have the couch, I don’t care. Whatever you want.”

I want you to answer the question. “No.”

“I’ll stay at Sam’s, you can have my place to yourself.”

“No.”

“I’ll get you a hotel.”

“No.”

“I’ll….”

“Stop. Go the fuck away from me.”

“Ygritte, you cannot run away from me in this city, you have never been here before. Your overnight bag is in my apartment.”

“Keep it, I want nothing to do with you.” she increased her pace; she was practically running.

Jon reached out to take hold of her arm; neither expected what came next. Suddenly her hand balled into a fist and collied with his face with force neither knew she possessed. Unprepared for the blow, Jon stumbled backward and leaned forward.

Ygritte paused for a moment, just a moment, to confirm she hadn’t done any real damage. “Stay. Away. From. Me.” she didn’t know what she’d said until the words left her body and she’d already put a block between them.

He never answered the question. Why couldn’t he just answer the question?

Because, Ygritte, she thought, if he didn’t love Daenerys, you wouldn’t have needed to ask…

______

Jon tried to keep up or trail behind, to make sure she was alright, but he lost her trail. He tried calling her, left her voice messages, sent texts. He tried her roommates and her closest friends. Begged them to just confirm she was alright. All went ignored and unanswered.

On Saturday morning, he woke up to the sun on his face, a hangover (of both the emotional and physical kind) and no notifications on his phone. After another round of calling, voicemails, and texting, he willed himself to get out of bed for ibuprofen and water. It was on his third glass of water when his phone finally buzzed. The waive of relief he felt quickly diminished when he saw the sender and the contents of the message…

It was from Daenerys and it read “I’m guessing things aren’t going so great with Ygritte?” and had a screenshot of a message posted from Ygritte’s roommate to Deanery’s Facebook wall which read “For anyone wondering the kind of People Jon Stark and Daenerys Targaryen are, they’ve been sneaking around behind Ygritte Snow for three years. Feel free to share this with any party that should be in the know.”

Jon’s head throbbed a little more in that moment. “Fuck!” he exclaimed to no one in particular.

His phone buzzed again:

“Today’s probably a rough day for you. And I’m really sorry for that. But if it makes you feel any better, I literally just became friends with the guy I’ve been crushing on in my ethics class. So I’m pretty sure that’s out. Also, Jon, this girl capitalized the “P” in people. In the middle of a sentence. WTF.”

Despite himself, Jon smiled and wrote back “millennials…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm glad you made it to the end! Thank you!
> 
> I haven't written anything in almost ten years and it's taken a lot of failed attempts to get me here.
> 
> I have a lot planned for this story but I'm not sure what we're looking at in terms of chapter numbers versus per chapter.
> 
> I am (as you can probably tell) brand new to this site as a participant instead of voyeur. That being said, please let me know if there are things I could do better. I'm not sure if my narration works. I think at times I shift from omniscient to some weird kind of first person and I don't know if it's jarring? I tried to stay in third person but let me know if I shifted at all.


	2. Break a Rule, Jon.

“Alright, Dany, it’s your turn.” Pyp nodded across the table.

“Pyp,” she reprimanded, “I just went.”

“Look, it’s not my fault nobody else wants to play.” He shrugged. “Either you go, or I go. But if I go, I can assure you that you’ll be taking another swig of your drink.” He ended with a toothy grin.

“Alright, never ever have I ever…” she paused, biting her lower lip in thought.

Just then, the lock clicked and the door to the flat opened, revealing a weary looking Jon. He stepped in, removed his damp jacket and dropped his bag on the floor by the door, all the while fighting a losing battle with his umbrella. “And where have you been all day, young man?” came Pyp’s accusatory voice from his spot across from Dany at what could scarcely be called their “kitchen” table.

Jon looked up from his efforts, flustered, “trying to do some research for class this week.” The umbrella was opening and closing slightly, spraying droplets of rain on the floor.

“Jon,” Dany began, “you do realize it’s Saturday and these are study abroad classes, right? Even the professors aren’t taking it as seriously as you are.”

“Dammit!” Jon exclaimed in frustration and threw the umbrella on the floor, finally admitting defeat. He crossed from the door through the living room and took a seat at the table with them.

“Rough day, dear?” Pyp asked with a sardonic grin.

“And thanks for taking of your wet shoes and not trailing a puddle across the flat.” Dany piled on.

Jon drew his thumb and index fingers across his eyes and inhaled deeply. “Not now, guys. Please?”

“Fine, I’ll bite.” Pyp stood, “what’s got your panties all in a bunch?” Finishing the question as we moved into the kitchen to fetch another beer for himself and one for Jon.

“It’s just been a day.”

“Well here, this’ll help. Doctor’s orders.” Pyp placed a can on the table in front of Jon with a loud clink. 

“Cheers,” Jon said gesturing the can in Pyp’s direction before taking a long sip.

“ Ahem. Did someone forget about me?” Dany asked in feigned surprise.

“Oh, so sorry!” Pyp mocked, “does the Lady of the house need a refill on her cocktail? My mistake.” He plucked her empty glass from the table. “Begging your pardon, we plebeians aren’t used to being in the presence of royals with such refined tastes. I’ll fix your drink to your liking, extra strong, no cost. Please don’t complain to management about me.” He moved to the kitchen and reached for the vodka. 

Dany rolled her eyes but chuckled slightly. “Don’t let it happen again.”

“So Jon,” Pyp called from the kitchen, “we were in the middle of pregamming with a few rounds of never ever have I ever. It was Dany’s turn, but since you’ve joined us, why don’t you hop in.”

“I think I’ll sit this one out. I don’t feel like going out tonight.”

“Listen, Gramps, I’m making the princess a fancy drink. I don’t put in this kind of effort for nothing.” Pyp stated as he made his way back to the table and made a show of presenting Dany with her drink. “Besides,” he continued as he sat down, “Grimm is only a ‘maybe’ tonight. If you bail on us, it’s gonna look like we’re together together.”

“Heaven forbid!” Dany teased, taking a sip of her drink. “Jesus, Pyp, did you put any Cran in this?”

“Listen, Goldilocks, you complained that you couldn’t taste the booze in the first one.” Pyp turned his attention to her, “now this one’s too strong. Good news for me is, either way the next one’s gonna taste just right.” He nudge his elbow toward Jon, “amirght? huh? huh?” He winked.

“And this is supposed to get me to want to hang out with you tonight?” Jon moved to the kitchen to fetch another beer from the fridge; for someone who didn’t want to go out tonight, he was keeping up his drinking pace. 

“Grimm and a few people from the program were talking about hitting up the bar tonight, might be nice to get to know some fresh faces.” Dany said as Jon returned, “you can’t spend three months in a foreign country and only hang out with me and Pyp. Branch out! Have an experience!”

Jon inhaled with an audible “huh,” and took a long swig of his drink. “Is that what you’ve been doing?” He looked at her skeptically.

She scrunched her eyebrows at him, curious. “What do you mean by that?”

Jon met her eyes, beer in hand. “Alright, I’ll play, Pyp.” He said, his gaze never leaving hers. “Never ever have I had a one night stand in a foreign country.” 

“Wellllll now.” Pyp took a sip of his drink. Neither Dany nor Jon paid him any mind.

Jon raised an eyebrow at Dany, who’d yet to make a move, in challenge. For a moment, Dany sat still, watching Jon with perfect posture and an impeccable poker face. Finally, she blinked, cast her gaze downward for a split second, and picked up her glass just far enough for the straw to touch her lips as she took a delicate sip before returning the glass to the table. “My turn?” She asked innocently.

“All you, princess.”

“Never ever have I lost a fight with an umbrella.” She smiled smugly.

“She’s got you there.” Came Pyp’s matter-of-fact voice. “Not me though.”

Jon raised both hands in defeat and took a long sip of his drink.

“Ok, let’s see here.” Pyp began, “what never have I ever done…hang tight folks, this is going to take me a minute.”

As Pyp rambled, Jon slouched back in his chair, one arm slightly over the back, his attention focused on the hand around the can on the table in front of him. His thumb drew little circles in the condensation.

“Never have I ever lied to my significant other.” Jon said, his voice far away.

“I mean, it was my turn, but sure go ahead.”

Jon looked up. No one had drank.

He turned his eyes to Dany. She didn’t flinch.

“Never have I ever forgotten to call my significant other on their birthday.”

“Wait, who’s birthday is it?” Pyp asked, “Also, still technically my turn.”

“You didn’t drink.”

“Neither did you.”

“I didn’t either, should I have? No one called me on my birthday guys.”

“Yesterday was Ygritte’s birthday.” Dany explained.

“Well that explain’s Jon’s mood.” There was a slight chuckle and emphasis as Pyp said the word ‘that.’ “I’m gonna go ahead a take a few sips and grab us a couple more beers.”

“Dany has a boyfriend.”

“And your point?”

“Does he know about your 5 A.M. walk of shame today?”

“So, what, Jon, you had a shitty day because you forgot to call your girlfriend and want to project that onto me and my relationship?”

“Do you not feel guilty?”

“Don’t mind me guys,” Pyp placed a beer in front of Jon and stepped backward to the doorway to the kitchen, “I’m just gonna grab some popcorn for this.”

“Maybe I don’t have anything to feel guilty about.” Dany shrugged and pushed back in her chair, an even tone to her voice. “We’re leaving at eight? I have to finish getting ready.” She looked between Jon and Pyp, “try not to miss me too much,” and left the room with a smile.

“She really riles you up, huh, Stark?”

“What?” Jon turned his gaze from the direction Dany had just gone to Pyp. “No, I just wouldn’t want to be her boyfriend right now.”

Pyp looked Jon up and down and chuckled to himself, “me either man, me either.” Before Jon could voice the question in his eyes, Pyp moved from his perch in against the frame of the kitchen. “I’m gonna play a new drinking game called drink the beer over by the TV.”

Jon closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths. Rationally, he knew it shouldn’t bother him so much. He and Dany had always gotten along. He liked her boyfriend, she and Ygritte were friendly. It’s not like they four of them were about to play couples charades or anything of the like, but still, they all got along well enough in their extended group.

They’d been in London not yet a full two weeks and the atmosphere between the two of them had shifted drastically. What was it? Was Jon trying to be protective of her the way he was his younger sisters? No that most certainly wasn’t it. There was something, far in the recesses of his consciousness, he knew it and could almost grasp it, but it was just out of his reach. Perhaps it was the fog of alcohol clouding his brain, perhaps it was something he wasn’t yet ready to know.

How could she be so cavalier about all of this, though? He’d seen Drogo drop her off at the airport and kiss her goodbye. Also, what the fuck kind of a name is Drogo? Why did this rile him up so much? Perhaps it was easier to get worked up over this than the fact that Ygritte didn’t answer his call today. Lightbulb! Why didn’t he think of that before, it’s always easier to focus on anything but the thing that’s really upsetting you.

By the time they left for the bar, the tension had eased, if only minimally and temporarily. The three cheers-ed to a good night with a shot of vodka and made their way through the bustling streets.

As luck would have it, Grimm was already at the pub when they walked in.

“Fancy of you to join us here!” He greeted with a smile.

“Got a little delayed by a bit of a lover’s quarrel back at the flat,” Pyp mumbled from the side of his mouth and hooked his thumb over his shoulder in the direction of Jon and Dany.

Ignoring him, Jon greeted with a firm pat on the back, “need a drink? I’ve been forced to drink the crap this guy claims is beer all night. I’m in need of a man’s beer to get the taste out of my mouth.”

“Cheers, man, that’d be great. Whatever you’re having.”

Jon turned to Pyp, raised his eyebrows in question and pointed.

“Oh you better believe, after an insult like that, you’re buying me several drinks, Stark.”

Jon rolled his eyes and turned to Dany, “I know you’re not going to drink a Guinness, so what do you want?”

As she opened her mouth to speak, he interrupted, “actually, mind coming to the bar with me? I’m never going to remember whatever froufrou drink you order.” Realizing the gruffness in his voice and recalling their earlier tension, he added a wink afterward, hoping he came off playful.

She gave a small smile, “sure.” 

The pub itself was what could be called ‘a hole in the wall,’ if one were prone to cliches; a space far too small and far too crowded. Runners up to be on deck to be next to order, Jon and Dany stood in silence next to each other; neither wanting to acknowledge the awkwardness and both grateful for the hum of conversation all around them.

Unable to stand it an longer, Jon turned to her. “Look, I’m sorry for what I said earlier or maybe how I said it.” He paused. “I don’t know. Today was a shit day and I was probably projecting.”

Dany smirked and they stepped forward, only one more person in front of them now. “You’ve got an interesting way of apologizing.”

He ran his hands through his hair, looking dejected.

“Jesus, Jon, I was kidding.” She put her hand up. “Trust me when I tell you, it’s going to take a lot more than a slight temper tantrum to offend me.”

He furrowed his brow, “how do you do that?”

It was their turn. “Do what?” she asked, before turning to the bartender. “Hi there! We’re going to need three Guinnesses, one vodka soda with a splash of Chambord and a lime, he’ll pay for those, and then two shots of Grey Goose, I’ll pay for those.” She handed him money.

He looked at her, mildly astonished, “that. You just roll with everything. Nothing upsets you. And who’re the shots for?”

“Those are for you and me. You need one to calm the fuck down and I need one to deal with you.” She smiled. “I don’t sweat the small stuff.” She shrugged.

The bartender placed their shots in front of them and went about pouring the rest of their order. She picked up a glass and held it in his direction, indicating he do the same. He followed her instruction. “Here’s to letting loose and remembering that you’re twenty, not fifty.” She took her shot like a champ, Jon had to grab for her drink to wash the burn out of his mouth.

“And you guys call me princess.” She teased as she took her drink from his hands. As Jon was handing his card to pay the tab, Dany made to head back to their group but stopped herself for a moment, “Jon.”

He looked up at her. “Yeah?”

“Keep in mind,” she smiled, “it’s just sex.” With that, she took her leave, bringing Jon’s astonished eyes with her.

By the time Jon regained his composure and made his way over to the group, handing Grimm and Pyp their drinks, Dany was engaged in a conversation with one of the guys Grimm had brought out. He was too far out of earshot to know what they were speaking about, he talking animatedly and she was laughing and had a hand on his shoulder, occasionally taking a pause to breathe and sip her drink. The drink Jon had bought for her.

When Dany smiled, her whole face lit up. When she laughed, really laughed, there was this twinkle in her eyes. He could see it now, even in the dark bar, because she’d worn her hair pulled back tonight so that none of her features were hidden behind her long hair. Not that her hair wasn’t a sight to behold.

Who was this guy anyway? And why was he now leaning in and whispering in her ear? What was he now whispering in her ear?

As if sensing his eyes on her, Dany looked up and made eye contact with Jon. Was that relief he saw?

“Jon!” She called. “Come meet Max.”

“Hey,” Jon extended his had as he moved to stand next to Dany, “nice to meet you. You’re in the program?”

Max returned the gesture, gripping Jon’s had just a little tighter, “yeah, I’m here from Ohio State. Met Grimm in our lit class on Tuesdays. Where’d you matriculate from?”

“Dany and I are both from Amherst,” Jon turned “Pyp over there is my best friend from home and also in the program. He’s from UVM.”

“Afraid you wouldn’t be able to make friends, so you brought some with you?” Max questioned.

“Max! Darts!” An unknown voice called.

“Guess we’ll have to pick this up later.”

“Counting on it.” Jon mumbled as he walked away. 

“Thank you, god!” Dany said dramatically once he was gone.

Jon looked at her, puzzled. 

“What?”

“You seemed to be having a great time with him a few minutes ago.”

“I was. At first. He was telling me a funny story.”

“What happened?”

“He started getting handsy. And he was definitely very drunk.”

“You’re drunk.”

“Not that drunk.”

“…Yet!” came the voice of Pyp, handing each of them another drink.

They both smiled and placed their empty glasses on a nearby table.

“So tonight, you wanted me to rescue you.” Jon challenged.

Dany bit her lip, “don’t flatter yourself. The male ego is fragile, you see. Didn’t want to risk offending the poor fellow. So instead, I did the stealth thing and brought in a cock-block.”

Jon raised an eyebrow, “oh? That so?”

“It is. You see, when he retells the story of why he didn’t take me home tonight, it won’t be because I wasn’t interested, it’ll be because you cock-blocked him.”

“Wow, I’m such an asshole.” Jon chuckled and took a sip of his drink.

“You really are.” Dany’s rebuttal laugh reached her eyes. Jon thought he felt butterflies in his stomach.

Just then, someone walking behind Dany lost their footing and stumbled, pushing her into Jon. She broke her fall on his chest, spilling her vodka and his Guinness before bringing them both tumbling to the ground, her atop him.

For the briefest of seconds the stared at each other, soaked in alcohol and surrounded by strangers but somehow completely alone. When the moment was gone, they broke into a fit of giggles, the kind only had after a few too many drinks.

“You guys ok?” Pyp asked, reaching his hand to aid them up.

“Yeah.” They said in unison as they stood and brushed themselves off, still trying to control their laughter.

“You guys are a mess.”

“Alright,” came the stern voice of the manager, “we’ve to clean this up and you two” he pointed, “have to leave.”

Pyp started to object, “Well hang on now just a second here—“

“—Pyp, it’s fine, we’re both soaked anyway. I’m good to leave, are you?” Jon looked to Dany.

“Yeah, I’m all sticky anyway. We have booze back at the flat anyway.”

“Alright, we’re gonna hang here for a bit and we’ll meet you back there later.”

Within half an hour, Jon and Dany had made their way back to the flat and had both changed into their respective pajamas, or jammies, as Dany had referred to them, and were in the kitchen putting together a snack.

“Drink?” Jon asked, holding up the half empty bottle of vodka.

“I probably shouldn’t have any more vodka tonight.”

“Loser.”

“I didn’t say I wasn’t going to drink anymore. I just said I wasn’t going to drink vodka.”

“So the princess is going to drink beer?” he teased.

“Ew. No. Never.” She grimaced.

“Why don’t you drink beer?”

“It tastes gross and it has far too many calories.”

“You realize you’re telling me this as you’re going ham on a bag of chex mix, right?”

“It’s called BALANCE.” She said sarcastically. 

“Well what did you want to drink then?”

“How do you feel about champagne?”

“If Pyp was here right now, you’d never hear the end of this, you realize that?”

She smiled, “but Pyp isn’t here right now…”

“I don’t know if I like champagne.”

She moved to the refrigerator and retrieved a bottle, “only one way to find out. Just a shame we don’t have the proper glasses.” She grabbed two tumblers from the cabinet, “I’ve got this, you get the snacks and follow me,” and lead him to the couch in the living room.

She opened the bottle with a loud ‘pop’ and poured a generous amount into each glass, handing one to him. She sat back on the couch, her legs folded under her, and took a long sip and closed her eyes. Finishing with an exaggerated ‘ahhh,’ she said “the nectar of the gods.”

In this time, he’d taken a seat next to her on the couch. He took a sip and swirled the liquid around in his mouth, adjusting to the taste, “it’s actually not bad.” He took another sip. “Not bad at all.”

She smiled back at him, “told ya.” Those butterflies again.

“Do you like this better than vodka?”

“Does anyone like vodka?”

He thought for a minute, “I guess you have a point there.” After a pause he said “then why don’t you drink this more often?”

She snorted. “I already have to put up with you guys calling me ‘your majesty’ and ‘queen’ and ‘princess,’ I’m not going to invite even more ridicule.”

“Does it bother you?”

She leaned forward and cast her eyes down, placing the glass on the couch between her legs. Biting her bottom lip and pausing a moment before looking up at him as a sad smile crossed her lips. “I told you, very few things bother me.”

She wasn’t being quiet honest. He felt the sudden urge to hug her. Instead he slid closer and pressed, “you sure?”

Her smile seemed firmer now, “yes. It’s actually almost endearing, kinda like being teased by my brothers.”

“You seem sad.”

“Alcohol’s a depressant, haven’t you heard?” she took another long sip.

“Dany,”

“I don’t want to do this.”

“Do what?”

“I don’t want to get drunk and tell you about my damage and cry and have you feel bad. Let’s just keep drinking and having fun.”

He took a deep breath, he knew he’d somehow just scratched the surface of something. “Well you’re wrong about one thing.”

“What’s that?”

“You’re already drunk.”

“Touché!” she smiled and clinked glasses with him.

“What’s the dumbest thing you’ve ever done while drunk?” She asked him.

He pondered for a minute. “I mean, I’ve done a lot of dumb things.”

“I want the one that takes the cake.”

He sighed and took a sip then held his empty glass to her, she filled it.

“Ok, I guess it’d be last Christmas break. I was in Boston with some friends and we were crashing at someone’s brother’s or cousin’s place, I don’t really know. We had a place to crash and we all had fake I.D.’s. My older brother Robb was kind enough to give me his last year. So anyway we were leaving the bar and I had to pay for the coat check.”

Dany interrupted, “who checks their coat at a bar?”

“It was a brand new Marmont jacket I got for Christmas!”

“And you guys tease me about being born with a silver spoon in my mouth!” Dany rolled her eyes and poked him in the shoulder.

“Anyway,” he looked at her pointedly, “all I had was a twenty and they gave me back fifteen one dollar bills. Literally, just a handful of ones!”

“The horror!” Dany mocked.

Jon continued as if he didn’t hear her, “so i was trying to straighten them up and fold them into my wallet when they slipped out of my hand and I dropped my wallet. Of course it was windy so they went flying around the sidewalk like leaves in the autumn.”

“Did you just say autumn?”

“Ahem,”

“Sorry, please continue. I believe we were talking about autumn.”

“So I pick up my wallet and everything had spilled. I get everything together and I realize I’m missing my I.D.”

“Wait,” she interrupted again, “your I.D. or Robb’s?”

“Robb’s.”

“Oh no.” 

“So I started pacing around the streets, picking up the ones as I came across them. Dany, I looked like a lunatic. My friends were yelling at me but I was too panicked to stop and explain what had happened.” He paused. “So then, I see this one of the bills in the middle of a crosswalk, and it’s flapping as if something is weighing it down. In my drunken state, the only logical explanation is that my I.D. is the thing weighing it down. So without thinking, I run to the middle of the crosswalk to pick it up.”

Dany shrugged in mock agreement, “of course. As one does.”

“Spoiler alert: it was not there.”

“Shocking.”

“Know what was there?”

“What?”

“A Jeep.”

“Oh my god. Jon!” Dany leaned in further, bringing her knee to her chest.

“Thankfully it was stopped when I made my mad dash into the crosswalk, so when they started to go from he red light, they didn’t hit my hard.”

“How hard?”

“I mean, hard enough to knock me to the ground by a few feet and leave me with scraped hands and a few bruises—chiefly of my ego.”

“Wow.”

“Gets better.” Jon put his hand up in pause and then placed his hand on her knee absentmindedly as he continued the story.

“How?”

“They were clearly drinking and freaking out. I was drunk and didn’t want them to think I was risking my life over a one dollar bill, so I kept trying to explain that I was looking for my license.” Dany was laughing now. It made him smile and chuckle slightly at the memory.

“Did you ever find it?”

“No,” he paused for dramatic effect, “but the Boston police did, right where I dropped my wallet and mailed it home with a note.”

“Well at least it’s your brother’s.”

“Except my brother was in Australia at the time.”

“Ruh roh.” Dany leaned back and raised her eyebrows. “Did somebody get in trouble?”

“I got a stern talking to from my father. A lecture on the importance of making good choices and knowing your limits when it comes to alcohol.”

“Sounds like a very TGIF moment.” Dany teased. “No punishment?”

“I was nineteen, what were they going to do?” Jon shrugged.

“You were the good kid, weren’t you?”

“What do you mean?”

Dany rolled her eyes, “your parents probably gave you that lecture, but then when you left the room were silently celebrating. It’s not that they didn’t punish you because you were nineteen, it’s because they knew you’d probably punish yourself enough for letting loose.”

“I let loose.”

She cocked her head to the side and raised an eyebrow, “I’ve known you for two years now and I can say, without a doubt, you most assuredly do not.”

“What am I doing tonight?”

“You’re drinking champagne?”

Jon leaned back, held his arms up in an exaggerated fashion and yelled “I’m letting loose!”

Dany covered her mouth to hide her giggle, “you’re ridiculous.”

“What?”

She looked at him patronizingly, “oh honey. It’s kind of adorable that you’re such a rule follower that you think this is letting loose.”

He leaned in closer to her, replacing his hand back on her knee, a smile on his face and a light in his eyes. “Since when is being a rule follower a bad thing?”

Her gaze met his eyes, “It’s not. I just think your brain would break if you ever knowingly broke a rule, self imposed or otherwise.”

“We have rules for a reason.” He was so close to her. “They protect us.” He wasn’t looking at her.

“Some rules hinder our growth,” he drew his head up at her voice, “but how are we to know if we never test them? If we never break them? Even just once?” His thumb had begun tracing small circles on the side of her knee. He wasn’t sure when but was now acutely aware of it, watching the invisible pattern on her flannel pajama bottom.

How long they sat like this, he couldn’t say; empires could’ve risen and fallen and he’d’ve had no clue. In this moment the only thing he knew for sure was his hand on her leg, the soft sound of her breathing, and the sound of his heartbeat accelerating in his chest. He’d later tell himself that he was trying to talk himself out of what came next, but there was a greater force pulling him to this very spot at this very moment.

When he finally drew in a breath and chanced a look at her, their eyes met and a thousand silent conversations were had in an instant.

She covered her hand with his, pausing his movements.

“Dany, I…”

“Break a rule, Jon.”

Without further hesitation he pounced on her as a predator would it’s prey, using her knee as leverage lunge for her. His other hand moved to capture her cheek, giving a slight tender caress before crashing his lips to hers in an explosive kiss. Her hands raked through his hair, pulling him closer as their mouths explored new territory.

As he kissed the spot right behind her ear, she emitted a slight moan and a deep intake of breath and he made a mental note. As their kisses grew exploratory and sloppy, their hands began to wander.

He broke the kiss and sat up, looking town on her flushed skin and swollen lips. “Fuck.” He said, through labored breathing. She smiled back at him, working to catch her own breath.

“We can’t continue this here.”

She nodded, “my room.” It wasn’t a question.

He stood and she followed suit, taking his hand and leading him down the hall. When they reached her door, she turned and leaned against it, looking down at there intertwined hands and then back up at him. She was leading him to water, but he was going to have to drink. He leaned down and pulled her in for a kiss, reaching behind them to open the door to the bedroom and pushing her inside.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all, thanks so much for all of your kind notes and words! They far exceeded anything I could've anticipated!
> 
> Any feedback is greatly appreciated--my writing chops are a bit rusty and while I'm finding it is like riding a bike, I am still getting my bearings back. So any glaring inconsistencies, please let me know. I am also terrible at editing and too impatient to wait, so you're getting a pretty raw work.
> 
> Writing for me is a very brutal process, so I cannot promise you a quick turnaround on chapters, but I am doing my best to churn out a story with full dimensional characters. 
> 
> Any questions, please let me know.


	3. Some Nights

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Songs I encourage for this chapter (at any time):  
> Desire-Ryan Adams  
> Homecoming-Josh Ritter   
> Some Nights-Fun.

“The feedback from clients is that they want more face time with our employees but also want their points-of-contact to be available when they email or call in. They feel they’re always getting an out-of-office message. That’s why we’re here today; as our employees on the front lines, we feel you’ll be able to bring us some valuable feedback to help us better service our clients.”

Jon bit his lip and closed his lids to hid the roll of his eyes he couldn’t suppress. It was the same damn story every time the busy season rolled around. Clients complained about not getting in touch with their reps, management asked for feedback, claiming they understood this was a busy time and were looking for unique ways to solve the problem. The answer to the problem was either hire more staff or compensate the existing staff fairly.

If only Jon ran the company, he thought satirically, as if it were that easy.

“Well have we thought about…” Jon’s head whipped to the meek voice of his newest colleague, then over to the management team in the front of the room leading the meeting.

“Yes, go ahead, we’re looking for any ideas!”

“Well, what about resource sharing?”

Oh Jesus, Jackie. (That was her name, right?) Brilliant, cause that’s never been thought of before. He was suddenly regretting his decision to come into the office directly off his redeye from L.A.

“That’s an excellent suggestion! Do you have any thoughts on how we can proactively approach this?”

Jon leaned back in his chair and placed the cap of his pen in his mouth and began twisting it, his other hand beginning to trace circles on the lid of his empty coffee cup. He was going to need at least one more to make it through this day.

When the meeting finally adjourned, Jon wasted no time making his way to the door, intending to beat the crowd to the cafeteria for a coffee when a familiar voice called to him.

“Man, you look like shit.” His coworker Edd said with a grin, catching up to Jon’s hurried step.

“At least I’m looking better than you, then?”

Ignoring him, “so how was the trip? Get any time at the beach?”

Their pace slowed as they reached the elevator, “didn’t bother trying to find it.” Jon shrugged.

“C’mon dude, your first trip to the left coast and you don’t bother sinking your toes into the Pacific?”

“After the client meetings, the last thing I wanted to do was driving all around that place.”

“Did you even leave the hotel?”

“I did, in fact.” Jon said with a cocky grin, just as the elevator reached them. “Turns out my hotel was right off the Universal lot, so I wandered around there for a bit, grabbed a burger and a beer, and finally saw Inception.”

“I think you’re the last person on the planet to see that movie.”

“Maybe, unless this is all a dream.”

The elevator dinged, indicating they’d reached the lobby. More importantly, indicating they were that much closer to caffeine. 

“Well, if you’re up for it, a few of us were going to hit up a bar over in the South End to blow off some steam after work tonight.”

“Man, you know how much I love a good thirsty Thursday, but I’ll be lucky if I don’t fall asleep at my desk before lunch today.” 

Jon was telling a half truth, hoping his outward appearance covered his lie.

“You realize that you’re going to have to have some kind of a social interaction with her at some point, don’t you?”

Busted.

Jon’s feed stopped moving, rooted in their place. By now they’d refilled their coffee and were making the trek back to the elevators.

“Dude, it’s not that big of a deal. You just gotta say hi to her, act as if nothing happened, and that will be the end of it.”

“Has she said anything about it?” Jon was mildly embarrassed, but mostly ashamed of his drunken indiscretion with a colleague after their beginning of summer work event. Just another to add to the list, he’d chided himself afterward.

Edd raised an eyebrow, “what is this, fifth grade? I have no fucking clue. Do you want her to have?”

“God, no!” Jon implored, that was the last thing he wanted. He’d had a hard enough time keeping his name out of the office gossip mill as it was, the last thing he wanted was to throw himself into the lion’s den. “I’d rather it just never be spoken of, but I also should probably apologize to her.”

Edd rolled his eyes, “first you come in voluntarily after a red-eye, now you’re blushing about a grown woman’s honor. Are you trying to make the rest of us look bad or is it just a natural talent, Stark?”

Jon smiled and held up his hands in an exaggerated shrug, “but I am wearing jeans on a Thursday.”

Remarkably, Jon found himself caught up in his work by the early afternoon. Admittedly he had to work through lunch in order to achieve this feat, but the thrill of seeing his inbox empty was worth it. His stomach’s rumble reminded him that the last time he ate he was in a different time zone.

If he left now, he’d have time to stop by the store and grab a few quick things, beat the rush hour crowds, and he could bring his computer home to check in on a few things. He wasn’t even technically supposed to be in the office today and he had a client visit early the next morning.

Resolute in his decision, Jon began closing out of his programs and shutting down his computer. As he was reaching for his laptop bag, a phone began to buzz on his desk. Instinctively, he reached for his company issued blackberry, only to realize it was his phone ringing. Who in god’s name could be calling him?

Unable to make out the name on his cracked and smudged IPhone, he answered it while continuing to pack his belongings, distracted. “Hello?”

“Jon?” That voice. His heart stopped. His stomach flipped. HIs pulse sped. “Jon?” The second time her voice was far more unsure.

“Ye-yeah, yeah it’s me.” He stuttered out. 

“It’s Dany.”

He interrupted, “I know.” No don’t say that you idiot. “I mean, hey, hi. How are you?” He leaned his elbow on his desk, face in his palm. What was wrong with him?

“Well, funny you should ask…” Did she sound nervous? “Listen, it’s kinda a long story, but I’m in Boston and I’ve sorta found myself with no place to stay. I know this is totally out of the blue and I really don’t want to impose, it’s just…I don’t know anyone else in this city.”

“Yes.” Wait what? 

“You’re sure?”

Yeah, idiot, are you? “Yes.” No. “It’s cool. I was actually wrapping up at work anyway, so I can meet you. Where are you?” Ok, you saved some face with that.

Silence on the other end of the line.

“Dany?” Was she second guessing the call now?

“Sorry, I’m trying to figure that out.” 

“Oh, right. Ok well you’re in the city, right?”

“I’m in a park?”

“Did you take the train? If so, what color line?”

“What the fuck, you use colors here?”

“Dany.”

“Ok, sorry. No, I took a cab from the airport.”

“Do you see the water? How big is the park? Do you see the state house?”

“Maybe? I see some water?”

“How the hell did you navigate in Manhattan?”

“There’s a man dressed as a giant teddybear with a handheld keyboard guitar?”

“Ah, got it. You’re downtown. You’re in the Common.”

“Shut the fuck up. That is not a landmark.”

“That’s keytarbear, he’s a city landmark!”

“Wait,” he could hear the smile in her voice, “this is a joke.”

“I’d never joke about keytarbear.” He paused. “Do me a favor, and make your way to the corner of Tremont and Park, I’ll meet you there in twenty.”

Twenty three minutes later, Jon was lugging his suitcase and his work bag up the stairs of Park Street station and into the sweltering humidity of the late August day. Finally dropping his bag on the ground and being able to wheel it, he paused and wiped his brow, wishing he’d also chosen to wear a short sleeve shirt in his minor act of dress code defiance this morning.

The sun insisted on slipping through the side of his glasses, making everything appear slightly distorted and hazy. Jon placed a palm over his temple, obstructing the rays from reflecting on the lenses of his sunglasses, and scanned the crowded sidewalk. It hadn’t occurred to him that she may look slightly or completely different. What if he didn’t recognize her?

As that thought entered his head, his eyes landed on her.

“Fuck.” He muttered to himself at the sight of her.

There she stood not five feet away, her head turned from him. She was wearing a light purple (or was that pink? Sansa always said he was dreadful at telling the two apart) dress of some kind of flowy material with her blonde hair pulled back into a braid that fell over one shoulder. She looked like she belonged in a fairy tale, not standing on the street next to a homeless person.

She caught sight of him, smiled, and waived.

In two steps, but what felt like ten years, he was in her space. 

“Hi.” He said awkwardly.

“Hi.”

Should he hug her?

“You have luggage. I hope you’re not homeless too?” She tried to ease the tension with a joke.

“Huh?” He looked down, “oh. OH! No, I just flew in from a work trip this morning and had to go straight into the office.”

She smiled. “Sounds like you’re important.”

“Trust me when I tell you, I am not.” he gave a shy smile back. Why didn’t he know how to talk to her anymore?

“So…”

“So…” he looked down at her. Suddenly he noticed the bag on her shoulder and the two by her feet and the wheeled one.

“Hang on, are all of these yours?”

She bit her lip nervously.

“Jesus, Dany, I know you were never a light packer, but what in god’s name do you have with you?”

She met his gaze, “everything I could carry and or which seemed worthwhile from my fourth floor walk up?”

Everything? Homeless? “Shit, what the hell happened?” Concern laced his voice.

“Oh my god, no, no, no!” She raised her hand in pause, “no, nothing like that. I’m not here to try and beg you for drug money or anything like that.”

He smiled at her and his gaze immediately warmed, “I’m glad that’s where your mind went.”

Her eyes went wide, “that’s where YOUR mind went!” Her words accusatory but her tone jovial.

“Ok, fair enough.” He conceded, “so how does a twenty five year old, recent masters graduate, and non drug addict find themselves in an unfamiliar city with no place to stay?”

“I told you, it’s a long story.”

“Cliffs notes?”

“Let’s just say that, as it so happens, if a deal on rent looks too good to be true, it probably is.”

Jon inhaled and gritted his teeth, making a yeesh.

“Furthermore,” Dany continued, “if you want to get technical with it, I do have a place to stay.” she paused, “it’s just a basement with a stained cot and several four legged roommates which are neither feline or canine.”

 

“Well, in that case I guess their loss is my gain.” He smiled at her. Somehow it was always like this. So easy to jump back into a comfortable conversation as if no time had passed. Looking at her now, seeing her in one of her extremely rare vulnerable moments, it occurred to him that he really had missed her. This was going to be dangerous. This was probably a terrible idea. “Can you manage down the stairs if I grab one of these? My place is close to the train and only a few stops away from here.” He glanced at his watch, “at this time of day the roads are going to be jammed.”

She stretched her hand in the direction of the stairs, “lead the way.”

He hefted a bag onto his shoulders, “Jesus, are you smuggling anvils?”

“Sorry, that’s the one with some books and few bags of wine.”

“Bags? You’re drinking bagged wine now?”

“Don’t look at me like that! I still refuse to touch beer!”

“Well at least I know you won’t be stealing the good beer I have in my fridge, then.”

“And anyway,” she gave him a stern look “it started after the Frank intervention episode of It’s Always Sunny last fall. My friends from school and I got kinda obsessed and started buying boxed wine and drinking it out of cans.”

By this time they’d reached the platform and the sign was blinking indicating their train was approaching.

“Well, they are far more conducive to violent hand gestures. No one was intervening on him for a lack of good ideas.” Jon said, matter-of-factly. As the train approached, his side eyed gaze met hers and they shared a laugh.

The train was full of passengers, but not bursting at the seams the way it would be in peak rush hour. It was a short ride and Jon found himself unsure of how to continue their conversation. The brief honeymoon of their reunion now wearing off and the memory of their last encounter slowly returning to his conscious mind. Should he say something? Rip the preverbal band-aid so they could move past it? Or would that make things worse?

When the train was stopped at Kendall/MIT, he noticed a familiar face get on.

“Fuck.” It was the first words spoken since they’d boarded.

“What’s wrong?” Dany asked with a ruffled brow.

“Whatever you do, don’t make eye contact with this woman, don’t engage, and do not buy her bullshit story.”

“What are you…” Dany was interrupted.

“Excuse me, can I have your attention.” The familiar woman called to the empty train.

Dany turned to Jon, “oh god, one of those. You have them here too?”

Jon rolled his eyes, “I’ve literally heard a different iteration of this woman’s story every time I’m on the train. Ironically enough, they all seem to involve needing money for a pizza.”

“I feel like they always seem to involve needing money for a pizza.” Dany smiled.

“Thankfully, she’s getting off at Central.” Jon raised his hand on the grip poll and leaned against it, looking down at Dany. “I’m really glad you’re here.” The words toppled out of his mouth before he realized what he was saying.

Caught off guard by either Jon’s words or the train’s sudden acceleration away from the station, Dany stumbled slightly forward, catching herself on Jon’s chest. Regaining her footing, she stepped back and placed a firm grip on the poll, just beneath Jon’s. 

After a small delay, which the conductor announced was to fix a scheduling issue, they were disembarking at Davis Square.

‘Has anyone ever told you that your trains here suck?” Dany asked as she struggled to balance all her bags on one escalator stair.

Jon smiled, “oh, all the time. Our shitty, out-dated transit system is a blemish we wear with pride. Hardens you up.” He pointed to a sign on the wall indicating the upcoming month’s weekend shuttle bus schedule. “I know you southerners have your whole charm thing going for you, but up here in the North East we bond over complaining about things that make us unhappy. The Sox lost last night, they’re predicting four feet of snow tomorrow, the train was delayed on the track for forty five minutes with no apparent explanation, my coffee from dunkies definitely has sugar when I specifically said no sugar, etc, etc…”

“Jon, I have seen snow before. In fact, I’d argue there’s probably more of it in western Mass than here in Boston.”

“Say that to your new coworkers the first forecast of a nor’easter this year. Let me know how that goes for you.”

“Are you trying to tell me how to make friends at school?”

“Ok, my street is just back here,” Jon said, leading them out of the station. A quick right and a left, and he was pulling his keys out of his pocket.

“You can practically see the train from your place!”

“Yeah, I got pretty lucky with it. Robb and I moved in right out of college and somehow snagged a really great deal. Thankfully, the landlord has barely raised the rent and I’m on a month-to-month now.”

As he ushered her inside, and they stumbled their way up the flight of stairs to his apartment.

“Tell me you have air conditioning.”

Successfully unlocking the door, Jon all but threw the bags on the floor. “The good news is that I do, the bad news is that since I’ve been out of town a few days it has not been on.”

A wave of heat hit Dany as she walked inside. “This is actually pretty nice, Jon.” The door opened into surprisingly good sized u-shaped kitchen.

“Actually? What you expected a tenement?” Jon kicked the discarded bags further into the kitchen and reached to help Dany unload. She fully entered and shut the door behind her. “The living room is this way,” he pointed past the counter in the kitchen “as you can obviously see. The door right there straight ahead is my room, the door perpendicular to it is the bathroom, and the door parallel to mine is the guest room.”

“Guest room? I thought you said you lived here with your brother?”

“We moved in here together, but his company transferred him to London for work, so it’s just been me for a year or so now.”

“Does that mean?” Dany looked at him, eyes wide.

“Yes, you can sleep in a bed. You don’t have to crash on my couch.”

“I’d hug you right now, but it’s hot and you’re sweaty. But know I’m grateful.”

“Oh, only I’m sweaty?” he huffed.

“I glisten.”

“So, you don’t want me to turn on the A.C. then?” he smiled.

She didn’t miss a beat, “crank that fucker up as high as it goes.” she paused, “or low? Whatever you need to do so that I can stop glistening quite so much.”

“It’s still going to take a little while for the place to cool down, are you hungry? Do you maybe want to go grab some food and catch up while we wait?”

And that’s how they’d ended here, eating pizza and drinking by 3:30 pm. Their conversation slowly becoming more comfortable as their inhibitions lowered.

“Can I get you two anything else?” the waitress was clearly trying to flip the table ahead of the after work rush.

“I’ll have another,” Jon gestured to the large, now empty, stein.

“For you?”

“I don’t know…” she looked at the glass which had held her vodka soda, “I’m almost tempted to get one of those giant beers.”

“Do it! All the cool kids are doing it!”

“Ok, I’ll have what he’s having.”

“Be right up.”

“

“All the cool kids are doing it.” Jon repeated his earlier joke once more with a little more sarcasm. 

“You do remember the one night you got me to drink guinness in London right? Remember the next morning?”

Jon stiffened at the thought. He remembered the night well; it was their last week abroad. 

“Do you still feel guilty?”

That was a question he was not prepared for.

“Don’t you?” His tone came out more accusatory than he intended.

“I don’t have anything to feel guilty for.”

He looked at her, incredulous. They’d hurt people, they’d hurt someone he loved.

He inhaled deeply and closed his eyes; he didn’t have it in him to have this discussion again after so long.

“I am guilty.” He mumbled quietly, passive aggressively, to himself.

“Here you go, enjoy.” The waitress slammed their beers down on the table.

Grateful, Jon immediately reached for it.

“Look, Jon, I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”

“Dany, I—“

“I get it,” she interrupted, “I promise, I won’t be a burden on you too long. I just need to get settled into my job for a couple weeks and then I’ll be able to focus my attention on an apartment search. I swear, I’ll be out of your hair before the leaves start changing color.”

Daenerys Targaryen spoke with confidence. Regardless whether she was giving a presentation on the meaning of the mortality themes in Hamlet or discussing an event in her own life—never once showing a weakness. This was a personality trait which had found incredibly attractive and, simultaneously, infuriating.

The morning of their college graduation, the last time he saw her, he realized it was a defense mechanism, an armor she built around herself. It was the closest they’d ever come to getting in an argument and the whole time she stayed calm and collected and, in the end gave him a curt smile, congratulated him, and walked away. 

She was infuriating.

“So,” her voice drew his focus from the condensation on the side of his glass up to her deep blue eyes, “if i’m already committing to a hangover tomorrow, whaddaya say we chug these and then go drink some of my bagged win from cans?” She flashed that smile that lit up her whole face and gave him goosebumps.

He held up his glass in cheers, “I’ve already got the Sunny in my DVD player.”

He was fucked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope this wasn't too boring. This chapter was harder to get out because it's mostly exposition. There are so many talented writers on this site and it's somewhat overwhelming. I am lazy with exposition and prefer dialogue but acknowledge that doesn't move a story along. 
> 
> A couple people have asked for clarity on the timeframe...that's intentionally slightly murky. I dropped a bunch of not so subtle hints in here.
> 
> To give you all a better idea of my plans for this story, these chapters are a lot of set up and most of it is not going to take place in the college years. I'm jumping around with the years because...well..it's fun for me.
> 
> That being said, my intention is for the next chapter to take place kind of directly after this (it'll make sense and you'll see why).
> 
> I'm also toying with the idea of making a playlist for this, thoughts?
> 
> Thanks also for all your amazing feedback, I don't know how to respond because I'm terrible with this site but i REALLY appreciate it. (If anyone knows how to make italics appear, that would be a fantastic help!)


	4. To Be Alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Highly recommend you listen to or read the lyrics to "To Be Alone" by Hozier; honestly if there's any song that encapsulates the relationship i'm trying to build with Jon and Dany, it's this song.
> 
> Fair warning, this chapter is why this story gets it's MATURE rating.

Jon looked up at the driver, startled.

“Sir, I think you fell asleep.”

That couldn’t be, he blinked and drew his hands to his eyes. 

“Is this the place?”

He looked and realized they were outside his apartment. Was that right? Spending the past two weeks timezone hopping from one open enrollment meeting to the next had gotten him all turned around. What day was it? Friday? If it was Friday then he was home.

His head involuntarily hit the seat behind him. Home. He wouldn’t see the inside of an airplane for another week and a half, gods be good.

“Yes, sorry.” He handed the driver his company card and waiting for a receipt. Typically, he’d take the train or drive to the airport, but seeing as this time he was away for almost three weeks, he’d decided the livery service would be cheaper than parking his car in even the economy lot.

After signing and procuring a copy of the receipt for his expense report, Jon somehow managed to get his bags from the car and up the stairs. As he opened the door to his apartment, he was met with an eerily serene quiet. Looking around, he noticed first how clean it was.

Though the afternoon sun shone in the long windows, Jon could do nothing but leave his bags by the door in the kitchen and stumble tenuously to his open bedroom; leaving a trial of abandoned and travel soiled clothing in his wake.

Entering his bedroom gave him pause, though. He hadn’t made his bed before he left. He hadn’t made his bed since he was in high school and his mother withheld allowance money. As his brain attempted to compute the scene which lay ahead of him, he noticed a coconut water and what appeared to be a bottle of vitamins on his nightstand.

Curious, Jon moved to examine the bottle, only to notice a note laid underneath.

“Welcome home, weary traveler! Though the accommodations likely don’t match those of the fancy hotels you’ve grown accustom to, herein please find our finest hydration/potassium combination and a bottle of vitamin b tablets. Presumably, any cure for hangovers will also work for jet lag (if not, don’t blame me, I studied literature in college not medicine).

Rest well and dream of large women.

(Excited to have my roommate back.)

-Daenerys “

Jon smiled and place the paper back on his nightstand, ripping back his covers and drowning himself in the scent of his freshly laundered sheets.

“Shit!”

Jon awoke sometime after dark, still needing a moment to collect his thoughts and remember his surroundings.

Quickly throwing on a pair of flannel pajama bottoms and a t-shirt, he stumbled out of his bedroom, an alluring scent hitting his nostrils as he padded through the living room.

“Well look who finally decided to join the land of the living!” Dany smiled from her place in the kitchen.

“What time is it?”

“Just after nine.”

“Christ. You shouldn’t have let me sleep.”

Dany met him with a skeptical gaze. “So look, the lead I had on an apartment in Southie ended up being bunk,” she paused, picking a pan of pasta to strain and looking at him, “which i’m sure you’ve deduced by the fact that i’m still here.”

“Dany, I told you, stay as long as you need to.”

He meant it, too. He refused to accept money for rent in September and October, assuring her that his compensation for travel would more than make up for the little extra electricity and hot water she’d been using. They’d both known what a hit she’d taken financially during grad school and though Jon wasn’t exactly rolling in cash, he’d faired well enough before she’d taken up space in his spare room. He knew she felt guilty though, she hated feeling as though she owed something to someone; always worried about a debtor coming to collect.

“Well, don’t get used to this, but in honor your return I’ve made one of the few things i’ve mastered in the kitchen.” He raised an eyebrow, interest piqued, “Pasta with a Bolognese sauce.”

“You don’t have anything better to do on a Friday night?” He asked with levity.

“I want to hear of your travels, and besides, there’s a batman movie marathon on tv, what would be better than this?”

“Nolan or Burton, or those other shitty two?”

She cocked her head to the side, feigning exasperation, “there’s only one true caped crusader in my heard, Jon, we both know this.”

“Ah, so it’s Clooney then?”

“Do you want this pasta or not? I could just as easily give myself a portion and freeze the rest for lunch at work.”

He resigned himself, “ok, ok, what channel?”

She gritted her teeth as she dumped the pasta into the sauce pan, “TNT?”

“Ugh. Dany,” he whined, “they cut out all the good parts.”

She rolled her eyes at him, “well I can watch alone if it suits you, then? Jeez, now who’s the princess.” She teased.

“What can i do to help?” he relented.

“You could pick a bottle of wine to open?”

“Was that your grand plan? Thrown carbs and batman at me and get me to drink wine?”

“You like wine!” She defended.

“I didn’t mind the taste of the bottle you had before I left for my work trip. That doesn’t mean I want to drink wine.”

She held up her hands, “oh excuse me.” She paused, moving to the fridge, “would you prefer a Shipyard Pumkinhead to bring out the subtle herbs I so carefully chose for this sauce?”

“Did you get shipyard? I haven’t had a single one this year.”

She refused to look up at him, now moving to the oven to retrieve garlic bread. 

“And hang on,” he stepped forward accusatory, “don’t act all high and mighty here. I see right through you.”

She looked at him, eyes challenging.

“You got that Bolognese sauce recipe off the back of a package of noodles from Trader Joes.” He couldn’t help the way his chin raised, showing his pride.

She looked at him, then looked back to the bread in front of her, pressing her lips together with a quiet “humph.”

He inhaled, “so which bottle of red did you want to open tonight?”

As he moved to the small pantry, he paused for the briefest of moments to glimpse her at work plating their food. He wasn’t sure exactly how they’d come to this comfortable camaraderie, but he was happy with it. Her in this apartment felt right.

Wait, where did that come from?

He heard a clink behind him, “fill these up as high as you’d like. I haven’t had a drink all week and work has been a shit show.” She placed the glasses on the counter behind him.

He wasn’t sure exactly how, but one glass with dinner turned into three, and then another bottle was opened. And now they were debating the merits of actors to play batman on the silver screen.

“Jon, how many times must we go over this. You cannot compare Burton’s batman to Nolan’s. I refuse to debate this with you.”

He leaned back on the couch, irritated. “You refuse to see the true genius in Burton’s batman. Nolan focuses on the external, Burton focuses on the mental fatigue Bruce Wayne incurs due to his dual personalities.”

Dany laid back on the couch in an exaggerated motion, feigning falling asleep. Leaning back up she rolled her eyes and folded her hand like a mouth, “blah blah blah blah.”

“Let’s just say the truth right here right now.”

“Oh, and what is that?”

“You like Nolan’s batman because Christian Bale portrays him.”

“Well, that’s at least part of it.” She admitted, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

He smiled as he looked at her, picking up his glass, “excuseee me.”

“Hey!” she reached for her empty glass, “share the wealth.”

“What wealth?” he asked, sipping his wine.

“I thought you didn’t like it?”

“It grows on you.” he leaned his head back and closed his eyes. The wine really had gone to his head; this was definitely not a feeling he remembered getting from a few beers.

Before he realized what was happening, he felt her body weight pressed on him and as he opened his eyes he realized she was leaning over him to reach for the half empty bottle on the table beside the couch.

The swiftness of her movements caused his nostrils to fill with the scent of her perfume, or lotion, or bodywash,; whatever it was, was a familiar scent that brought him back to nights filled with soft caresses and passionate kisses, skin against skin and sounds he thought about often when he was alone.

He took a deep breath to try and regain his composure.

Her posture had somehow contorted itself in such a way that most of her body weight was pressed on her forearm, right next to his head.

Before thinking about the implications or complications, Jon reached up and grasped the bottle from her hands, slightly startling her.

Meeting her eyes, he replaced the bottle on the table, pausing to see if she make an objection. When none came, his hand moved to her thigh, gently stroking it up and down, noticing as she bit her lip but never broke contact.

In a fluid motion, his palm wrapped around the back of her leg and drew it over his lap, his other hand sliding up her petite frame and reaching the base of her neck. With one final deep breath, he pulled her face toward him and unleashed on her all the built up affection he’d been hiding for two and a half months.

Immediately responding, her body melted to his; her hands pulling his face closer to hers and a slight moan escaping her lips.

Involuntarily, their hips began to move together, thrusting toward each other and begging for relief from the building friction as their kisses grew deeper and more passionate.

Before Jon knew what was happening, his hands were placed squarely on her hips, underneath the conservative dress she’d been wearing, pressing her against the building pressure in his groin.

He kissed her neck, reveling in the mewling sounds she made as he hit the spot right by her hear which he knew drove her crazy. He made an effort not to neglect her collar bones and earlobes, reveling in trying to still her ravenous hips.

She was above begging, until the last.

Knowing what she wanted, her hands reached for the waist of his pajamas, a petite hand slipping underneath the wrap itself around his ache for her, causing him to break their kiss.

“Fuck. Dany.”

Their lips met as her hand began to stroke his hard cock.

There were a million reasons why they shouldn’t be doing this right now. A million and one probably. They’d gotten on as roommates with no sexual tension for two and a half months now, this was assuredly going to ruin it.

Although.

As his fingers found their way inside the fabric of her cotton panties—finding her wet, oh so wet, and thrusting to his touch—his mind replayed the two and a half months of “innocence” they’d shared.

While he couldn’t speak for her, he’d certainly found himself in his own hand, in need of a towel or tissue after evening out or a late night in, or a casual Sunday morning conversation. (What was it about the sit of her disheveled in the morning that immediately got him hard and ready to go?)

Bringing himself back to the moment, Jon began thrusting his middle and index finger inside of her; watching her atop of him, biting her lip and bucking her hips involuntarily.

His kiss made it’s way up her neck and across her jaw, finally finding her ear again, he rasped “I forgot how wet you got for me.” His breath tickled against her skin before his lips pressed feather light kisses.

In response her head arched back as her hand went to his wrist, grasping it as she rode it through the orgasm that overtook her body.

It was all Jon could do not to finish himself at the sight. God had he missed this, the sight of this woman so calm and collected at all times, coming apart on his fingers. It only made the ache in his own loins grow.

As her body came down from the highs of ecstasy, Dany slowly leaned forward and met Jon’s gaze with heavily dilated pupils and a drunk and sleepy smile. Her mouth was suddenly on his again, her hands placing his back at her hips, an invitation. 

Jon thrust his hips against her, feeling the wetness he’d caused drip against his hard flesh.

Her hand found it’s way around him again, slowly rubbing him against her sopping center. She knew he’d never make the first move again, so as she place the tip of him at her entrance her kisses trailed from his jaw to his ear, only to whisper, “fuck me, Jon.”

Now having the invitation he needed and willing himself to worry for the consequences later, Jon thrust himself hard upward and inward, pulling Dany’s hips down onto him and capturing her lips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't promise this story will have a ton of chapters like this; I'm a bit of a prude when it comes to writing. But I felt the story needed some ~sexytime~ descriptions to help portray the draw that Jon and Dany have to each other.
> 
> I'm going to TRY and use NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month; aka November) to get some chapters on the books (lol see what i did there?) for this story.
> 
> I can't express enough how much your kind words and kudos mean to me. Even if you're a lurker and helping the visit count increase, i sincerely appreciate it. you're collectively helping pull me back to my love of writing.
> 
> Any questions, please ask. If i can answer them, i will.
> 
> Thanks, happy monday!


	5. One Last Time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you ALL so much for your super kind posts! My heart literally skips a beat every time I get a notification of a new comment or kudos, so please know how much I appreciate it!
> 
> An additional thanks for adsomniahouse for alerting me to the GoT cast and Jason Momoa hanging out and drinking Guinness last week! I'm not saying my story inspired their hangout session, but I'm not _not_ saying it. (jkjkjkjk lol)

# Well, Bless Your Heart

##  Chapter 5: One Last Time

_“Sorry we keep missing each other! My roommates and I just popped into an internet cafe on our way to the train station and I wanted to at least send you this. We’re spending the weekend in Rome._

_Rome, Jon!_

_Apparently our hostel is within walking distance of the Vatican (I know how jealous you’ll be, so I promise to take lots of pictures:))_

_I’ll try to give you a call tomorrow around 2 your time, but I’m not sure I’ll be able to get to a payphone, so don’t hold me to it._

_Did I tell you I got ahold of Sansa finally? We went through the comments I had on her college essay (it’s very good, btw!)._

_Just got a fifteen minute warning—I’ll talk to you soon!_

_< 3 Ygritte”_

Reading the email for what felt like the hundredth time, Jon clicked back to the blank document which was supposed to contain the answers to his take home exam. Normally an attentive student, his concentration had been elsewhere since arriving at the library and checking his email.

“How far’ve you gotten?” Sam’s voice drew his mind back to the present.

“Woh, Sam. I thought you were in class until one?”

Puzzled, Sam replied, “I was. It’s quarter past?”

Jon’s head dropped to his hands as he let out an exasperated groan. “Fuck.”

“I thought you said this test was supposed to be an easy A?”

Unmoving, Jon’s reply came muffled, “it was. It is. This whole damn class is supposed to be an easy A.”

“What’s the problem then?”

Jon sat up and abruptly closed his laptop. “I can’t concentrate! I shouldn’t be wasting my time and energy on electives when I have classes in my major that I’m neglecting.”

“You sure that’s it?” Sam treaded lightly.

Jon cut his head sharply, “what’s that supposed to mean?”

Letting the subject drop, Sam opened his book bag and took out his own study materials.

What was that supposed to mean? Jon’s leg moved restlessly as his pencil began an inconsistent tap against the mahogany desk.

“Mind? Pretty sure the entire room is shaking.”

“Sorry.” He stilled his actions for a moment, allowing his mind to wander. An exaggerated sigh told him his movements had returned not a longtime later. Fuck this, he thought, stuffing his belongings into his bag and standing abruptly.

“Where you off to now?”

“I’m going to go for a run. I can’t sit still so I may as well make channel this energy into _something,_ productive.”

Six hours and five miles later, Jon had not only completed his assignment but also made a trip to the laundry, packie (for after exams, of course), and showered.

Patting himself on the back for turning his day—and mood—around; Jon was allowing himself to indulge in an hour of TV before getting back to work on the last assignment hanging over his head when he heard the door open.

“Hey!” Jon turned to the unexpected voice of his roommate’s girlfriend, Missandei.

“Oh, hey Missy, I didn’t realize you guys were hanging out here tonight.” He began, powering off the TV and making a move to get off the couch, “I should probably finish my paper anyway. s’all yours.”

“No, no! Grey invited me and a few people over for some G rated fun and to destress tonight, did he not tell you?”

Shit. Others?

“Oh, um. I don’t know, he might’ve mentioned it, I’ve been a little distracted.” Jon put his hands in his pockets and attempted to act sheepish.

“You’ve been such a shut in lately. Hang with us and watch some movies and don’t think about finals and papers and the future.” She encouraged.

“Jon not worry? That’ll be the day.” Grey sauntered in and slipped a hand around Missy’s waste from behind, leaning in to peck her quickly on the cheek.

A loud knock rapped against the door, “sorry guys, tonight’s not the night for me. Definitely after winter break though. For sure.”

Moving swiftly, Jon found himself safely behind the protection of his bedroom door. The only bad decision he was going to make tonight was drinking caffeine after 6 o’clock.

Why’d he ever introduce his roommate to Dany’s best friend?

Losing himself in research and citations, before Jon knew it, it was almost ten and he was suddenly parched. Jon was proud of this paper, but just wasn’t _there yet._ Realizing he probably needed a solid couple of hours, he wondered if there was any more pepsi in the fridge. Refreshing and full of sugar and caffeine, just what he needed right now.

“Are you gonna hide in your room all night?” Startled, Jon’s shoulders flinched, causing his head to jerk against the top of the refrigerator. Drawing himself out, a hand went to massage the tender spot on the back of his skull, wishing there was something he could do for the bruise his ego had also just suffered.

“Sorry, I’ve got that paper that’s just been haunting me.” Not meeting her gaze, he opened the can in his hand with a loud cashushh sound and brought it to his lips, immediately recoiling when the liquid hit his tongue. “Fuck.” He pulled the can away, seeing now that he’d opened a Bud Light.

“Not what you were expecting?”

Placing the offending can on the counter, he shook his head, “I thought I had finally found a pepsi in there.”

Dany bit her lip to stifle a laugh, “why were you looking for a pepsi?”

“Oh, uh, I’m not drinking tonight.”

“That still doesn’t explain why you’d be going for a _pepsi_.” She challenged.

Feeling the tension ease from both his shoulders and the kitchen, Jon smiled at me her gaze, “pepsi is the far superior cola.”

She crossed her arms, “in what universe? Ever notice, at a restaurant, when someone asks for a coke the waiter says ‘is pepsi ok?’ yeah, that’s because no one ever wants pepsi!”

“You don’t even drink soda.”

“But I have a soul!”

“Would you rather drink Bud Light or pepsi?” Jon raised an eyebrow at her.

Her face contorted in disgust, “ew, neither.”

“You have to choose one of the two.”

“Says who?”

“Says the rules.”

“Well then I forfeit.” She shrugged.

“You can’t forfeit!”

“Ok fine, pepsi, happy?”

“I’m impressed, actually.”

“And then I’d dump it out in front of you.”

“Wait a sec.”

“You never said what I had to do with it once i chose it, Jon.”

“She’s got you there.” Both turned to see Grey in the doorway of the kitchen. “Dany, intermission’s over, second part of the double feature’s starting in five. Jon, you joining us?”

“What’re you watching?” Jon asked, tempted.

“Just Friends.” Grey smirked at him.

Dany’s eyes met Jon’s for the briefest of instants before darting away, ‘Nah, I really need to finish this paper.” His cheeks flushed.

“Suit yourself.” His roommate turned and walked out.

An awkward silence covered the room, Jon had no idea how to get himself out of this one. “Well, I should probably get back.” He said after a beat, pointing his finger through the door in the direction of his bedroom.

“Yeah, me too.” Dany made a move to leave and then paused as if thinking the better of it. Coming back and grabbing for the beer he’d discarded on the counter, leaving him with a wink and a lopsided grin.

Chastising himself, he reached for a glass and turned on the tap, filling a glass with something refreshing but definitely not full of sugar or caffeine. He was going to be left wanting in more ways than one this night.

 _You don’t have time for this_ , he muttered to himself as me made his way back to his room.

 

What was that? Jon rolled over in his bed, his eyes adjusting to the darkness. He’d just laid down in his bed and closed his eyes a minute ago. Hadn’t he? 

A shadow moving across his room, across his creaky floor boards drew his attention. Before he could ask who was there, he felt a dip in the mattress and saw the covers being pulled back.

“Dany?”

“Shhh” she pressed her finger to her lips and slid into the bed next to him.

“I fell asleep on the couch during the movie, I guess. I just want to sleep here. Promise.”

“Dany, this isn’t fair.” Jon sighed. She was testing his resolve, again.

“If it makes you uncomfortable, I’ll move back to the couch. It’s just more comfortable in here.” Despite her words, she snuggled deeper into the pillow.

Subconsciously, Jon moved closer to her, spooning behind her, wrapping an arm around her, and burrowing chin into the crux of her next, breathing her in. He’d long ago lost count of reasons why this was wrong, willing his mind to be blissfully ignorant as he lay here and enjoyed this moment. 

Feeling her snuggle slightly closer to him, Jon couldn’t help but place a light kiss against her skin before closing his eyes. 

_“Sorry we keep missing each other!”_

_“Rome, Jon!”_

_“ <3 Ygritte”_

The email may as well have been tattooed to the insides of his eyelids.

Jon’s eyes flew open as he tore away from Dany.

Startled, she turned to face him, reaching to him, her hand changing course mid air to land on his forearm with a gentle, reassuring caress.

“Do you want me to go?” He couldn’t be sure, but there seemed to be the smallest amount of vulnerability in her question. Whatever it was called to his heart. Ignoring the internal monologue of his moral compass, he pulled her back to him; their faces within inches of each other. His hand making its way from the valley of her hip, along the curve of her ribcage, pausing to trace circles with his thumb at the top of her arms, finally landing to hug the side of her face.

Sighing and pressing his eyes shut, Jon attempted to explain, “no…yes…but no?” He felt her head nod in understanding. He heard, rather than saw, her lick her lips.

“I wish…” she paused, “I wish it didn’t have to be so complicated.” Her hand had made its way to his side, squeezing affectionately. 

He wanted nothing more than to kiss her.

_But._

“Who was that guy you were with at the bar last night?” 

Her body tensed. “What?”

_Fuck._

“You’re the one who’s not being fair, now.” Her voice masked, again. Gone was the vulnerability of a few moments ago.

“I didn’t mean…”

Her hand moved to rub his side again.

“I know. But we agreed. Halloween was supposed to be the last time.” She bit her lip. “And then Ciderfest was supposed to be the last time…then the week before Thanksgiving…” She trailed off.

She was right. “I know. I’m sorry.” He nuzzled his nose against hers.

She moved to brush his disheveled hair from his face and he wished for nothing more than an instant of light, to see the emotions reflected in her eyes, just in that moment.

“I’m not complaining.” When she spoke, he heard the smile in her voice. “You are cute when you’re jealous, though.”

Unsure of how to respond, Jon opened his mouth and let the words tumble out. “One last time?”

“One last time.”

 

“Was that Daenerys sneaking out at the crack of dawn this morning?”

Startled, Jon almost overfilled his bowl of cereal. Placing the box on the counter, rolling the bag up, and folding it closed, he turned to Missy. “Oh, uh, yeah. She said she fell asleep on the couch during the movie.”

She side-eyed him as she moved to fill a mug with coffee, shaking the pot at him in offering. 

“Yeah, thanks.” He traded the milk for a full mug from her.

A mug in each hand, she moved to leave the kitchen, “is that what she was doing in the middle of the night? Sleeping?” She smiled, and added with a wink, “and again this morning?”

Before Jon could react, she was gone.

Both he and Dany knew the nature of their friendship wasn’t a secret in the apartment or their group of friends. The fact that Dany’s best friend had started seeing one of Jon’s roommate this semester hadn’t helped their feeble attempts to remain inconspicuous.

Their friends humored them, though, and played along with the charade of Jon and Dany’s relationship being nothing more than platonic. They weren’t above innuendo, however. No, that was something they shared in spades.

Now sitting on the couch in the living room, Jon held his bowl under his chin as he began to inhale what was now effectively mush.

“We missed you last night,” came Sam’s voice as he padded into the room. “Did you at least get your paper finished?”

Placing the now empty bowl on the coffee table amidst empty cans and discarded plates, Jon settled back into the embrace of the couch. “Pretty much, thankfully.” He took a sip, “Only thing left is to complete my citations and do one final edit, turn it in, and I am officially done with fall semester senior year.”

“Are you still planning on leaving after you turn the paper in?” Jon nodded his head in the affirmative. Sam was dreading this winter break just as much, if not more so, than Jon but for entirely different reasons. Having been rejected from the family’s preferred Ivy League, Sam was an embarrassment in his father’s eyes. It was going to be worse this break, knowing his younger brother had just been granted early acceptance. Jon really did feel for his best friend.

“Your last test is tomorrow?”

“Yeah.”

“You should come visit over the break. We can do a night on the town in Boston and you can see what it’s all about.”

“Thanks, maybe. That could be fun.”

“I can’t believe we’ve only got one semester after this one.”

“I know, I’m not ready to grow up.” Sam joked half heartedly. And after a moment, he drew his gaze up from his hands to meet Jon. “When does Ygritte get home?”

Jon’s jaw clenched involuntarily, “the end of next week.” He took another sip of his coffee.

“Are you guys gonna see each other over the break?”

Jon felt as if the room was closing in on him; as if he was sitting in an interrogation room behind a two way mirror. Without realizing his actions, he’d extended his hand and tilted his coffee cup toward him at an angle, staring into it with the same level of concentration he’d used on those ‘Magic Eye’ pictures as a kid. Unfortunately, just as in his youth, the answer to the puzzle never appeared before his eyes.

“Jon?”

“Oh, uh. Yeah, after Christmas, I think. Her family’s place in Burlington isn’t that far from our Ski condo at Killington so I think she’s gonna come spend New Years with us.”

“Are you excited to see her?”

“Of course.”

“Jon…”

“Sam, don’t.”

“I am worried for you. What is your plan for next semester?”

“Worry about yourself.” As soon as the worst left him, Jon knew his tone was too sharp. “Look, I’m sorry. I just…I’ve got everything under control, ok?” He stood, picking up his discarded dishes. “I gotta get going if I’m going to finish packing and I gotta run to church before I drop my paper off.”

 

___________________________

 

“Jon! Your phone’s ringing!”

“Who is it?”

“Are you, Jon?”

“Arya, stop being such a pest!” Sansa whined, “is it Ygriette? Is she almost here?!” Sansa made a grab for Jon’s phone which was plugged into the outlet on the wall separating the kitchen and family room.

“You can’t answer someone else’s phone. It’s rude!” Arya snapped back, snatching the phone with cat-like reflexes.

“He’s going to miss the call.” Arya crossed her arms across her chest, eyebrow arched, nonplused. “Arya!” Sansa clawed at her sister’s clenched fist but her moves were too slow. Simultaneously, Arya jumped back and threw back the hand clutching the phone, moving it out of Sansa’s reach.

“Jesus Christ, you two are going to have to get along sometime in your life!” Jon panted out, having run from the first floor of the condo up three flights.

“Jon Stark, watch that mouth! I raised you better than that!”

Sighing, “sorry mum. But…” He gestured to the display in front of him.

“Girls. I’ll have no more of this today! Sansa, look at the mess you made, there’s flour from your hands all over the kitchen!”

Head bowed and shoulders slumped, Sansa surrendered, mumbled a brief “sorry,” and moved back to her task of kneading dough for pizza; Arya leaning forward and sticking out her tongue at Sansa’s retreating form.

“You’re not innocent in this Arya.” Came Catelyn’s stern warning. “Go fetch firewood. Your father will make a fire when he gets in.”

“Heads up, Jon.” Arya said as she underhanded his now silent phone at him and scurried down the stairs, calling behind her “it was Ygriette” 

Ignoring Sansa’s further complaints, Jon moved to the opposite end of the living room, as far away from the kitchen as possible, and hit redial.

“I thought perhaps you’d changed your mind on the invitation to spend New Year’s with your family,” was how she answered the phone. “So I’ve already turned around and I guess you’ll just have to wait until spring semester to see me.”

“Very funny.” He paused, “sorry, though. The girls were fighting over my phone.” His eyes met Sansa’s across the room.

“Well that means at least one of you Starks is excited to see me.” He heard the clicking of her blinker, then suddenly the honk of her horn. “Asshole!” she exclaimed. “Sorry, a guy cut me off. Anyway, I’m just turning into the mountain entrance now. If this place is as easy to find as I seem to remember, I should be outside momentarily.”

“I’ll meet you at the door.”

Jon was still in the process of tying his boots when he saw Sansa scurry past his open door. If that wasn’t clue enough, the loud squeal he heard a few seconds later told him that Ygritte had arrived.

In the hallway behind their embracing forms, a blob of long red hair with arms, he cleared his throat.

Breaking apart, the girls exchanged a knowing glance before Ygritte rolled her eyes playfully as she slipped past the younger but taller Stark for whom she held great affection, sauntering toward Jon, stopping a few inches before him. “Now you’re excited to see me.” She wasn’t able to stifle the grin, which spread across her face, through her tease.

“I guess.” He played nonchalant before grabbing at her and lifting her into an embrace, their smiles mirroring one. He held her tighter as he pulled her in for a kiss which was interrupted by Sansa as she quickly slipped passed them, disrupting the air. “I’ll see you guys upstairs.”

Chuckling, Ygritte nuzzled her cheek to Jon’s. “I did miss you and I’m so glad to see you, despite this new look you’ve got going on.” She gestured to his longer hair and beard.

Placing a quick peck on her lips and relinquishing her from his embrace, “I missed you so much.” A new feeling washed over him as he said the words, one he couldn’t articulate if he tried. It was a mix of shame, guilt, disappointment, and nerves; he thought. Looking at her, seeing her here, in the flesh, he knew the words were true. He had missed her and he was happy to see her.

“So, guessing we won’t get alone time tonight?” Her brows wiggling suggestively.

“Mum and dad have made in clear that you’re to stay with Sansa tonight.” She pouted her bottom lip, “but I think we can manage something tomorrow while everyone’s skiing.”

Her hand placed at her chest, “ugh! You think I came here to spend the day with you when there’s fresh tracks to be had in the morning?” She said with levity.

“If you two are done sucking face, mom wanted me to tell you that dinner is almost ready and it’s your turn to set the table,” called Arya’s voice from the top of the stairs two flights up.

“Hi Arya! We’ll be right up.” Ygritte moved to the stairs and turned to look back at Jon. “Oh, be a dear and grab my things from my car.” She winked. “There’s a blue bag on the passenger seat in the front, bring that up with you, if you would? Don’t worry, I’ll set the table.”

Apart from her skis and the blue bag, all Ygritte had in the car was a duffle and her purse, he mused —not for the first time—how much he appreciated her concise approach to packing.

Ascending the stairs and turning at the top to head to the kitchen, he paused to take in they sight ahead of him. Ygritte stood in the kitchen already engaged in animated conversation with his mother and sister and holding a large glass of red wine. It struck him at how perfectly she fit in the scene; as if she belonged. She wore a simple maroon turtleneck sweater and dark jeans over Ugg boots, hair half pulled back. Knowing her as he did, little thought went into the clothes, but she looked like a Gap ad nonetheless.

Finally pausing her story long enough to catch sight of Jon, “oh! Perfect! Jon, bring the bag over, I’ve got gifts for everyone!”

“Ygritte, honey, you didn’t have to do that.” Catelyn chastised lovingly.

“Yeah, Jon didn’t even bring us presents from London.” Sansa said it with sarcasm, but he knew there was a bit of truth there. In honesty, of his three siblings, Sansa was the one with whom he’d butted heads with most. Robb and Jon always got on due to their closeness in age and the fact that they were boys. Sansa had been so excited to welcome a girl into their family, but she was given Arya. From a young age, Arya had no interest dress up or dolls or stories of princesses and due to this had a tendency to become a bit of a shadow to Jon.

Before introducing her to his family, Jon was sure Ygritte would get on best with Arya. Both tomboyish and loving video games, they did like each other quite a bit. Watching them now though, he saw the connection. It was often difficult to tear them apart once a discussion on literature or politics arose. 

Regardless of the reason, his relationship with Ygritte had brought him closer to his sister, and for that he was grateful.

“I know! I couldn’t help it though, I kept seeing things that reminded me of you Starks and eventually I just had to buy them.”

For his mother and Sansa, she’d brought back matching ornate murano glass necklaces, for Arya she’d brought back a book on the gladiators of Rome, and while she’d still yet to meet him she’d brought Robb back a framed photo of the Colosseum.

Pulling out the last trinket from her bag, she handed it to Catelyn, “I know the sulfates in wine bother you, but I was assured this has none of them and we drake bottles and bottles of it. I wasn’t sure what to bring back for Ned, so I figured two bottles of this would suffice?” 

“It’s perfect, he’ll love being able to share this with us. He and Robb should be in from night skiing any minute now, actually.”

“Oh, I love night skiing!”

Sansa scrunched her face, “it’s so dangerous!”

“It’s _exhilarating!_ ” Ygritte smiled and pulled on Sansa’s arm, linking elbows. 

Catelyn smiled warmly, "Ygritte, you're always welcome for New Years skiing with us.”

“Well, I’m here now. And I’m excited to see how much better at this I am than Jon.” She winked. “Plus, last year I wouldn’t have know exactly when to slip Sansa her glass of champagne.”

Sansa perked up, “really? Mum please!”

“Well,” Catelyn started, “I suppose you’ll be leaving for school before we know it.” She relented, “but just the one!”

By the look on her face and the posture with which she delivered the words, Jon knew his mother was well aware Sansa was going to be drinking more than one glass of champagne.

Sansa and Ygritte were giggling and whispering conspiratorially and suddenly they were heading for the stairs. As she passed, Jon caught Ygritte’s hand. “What about me? Don't I get a gift?”

She smiled and blue him a kiss “my being home is your gift,” and ended with that wink of hers.

“Of course.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anddd now we jump back in time again.
> 
> Initially, I wanted this to be two chapters, but I couldn't get the scenes to a length I liked, so you got a two-for-one.
> 
> The next chapter will be another time jump forward--and as long as my fingers don't get a mind of their own (which they tend to do sometimes), this is going to include a scene I've been looking forward to (and also dreading) writing since this story was just a daydream.
> 
> Also! I figured out how to format with _italics!_ Woohoo!
> 
> And yes, Jon is far more conscientious about editing than yours truly. 
> 
> Enough Saturday morning rambling on my part.


	6. Fidelity

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Highly recommend familiarizing yourself with the song "Fidelity" by Regina Spektor
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pu0w7ElwWJA

“There you are!” Dany exclaimed at Jon as he made his way through the crowded bar to her. “You’re late!” She chastised, arching her neck to give him a kiss hello.

“Ugh, work was a complete nightmare and my boss was no help.” Jon complained as he shrugged his bag to the ground.

“I ordered you a beer, but it’s probably a little warm now.” She hoisted a large stein from the bar and handed it to him.

He accepted it with a laugh, “that thing is bigger than you.” He took a sip and smiled, “it’s prefect. Thank you.” He leaned down for another quick kiss. “How was your day?” His hand found it’s way to hers, interlacing fingers.

It had been a shit day, but being here with her, like this, somehow made all of the day’s frustrations disappear.

“Busy but somehow boring. I don’t want to talk about it, I want to enjoy tonight.” Dany hated her job, hated her salary, and mostly hated her coworkers as well.

“Daenerys?” a server came up to them.

“Yes.”

“Is this the other member of your party?” 

“Yes, thank you!” Dany rose from the stool, using Jon’s shoulder as leverage.

“Ok, follow me.”

“What is this?” Jon was curious.

“We’re busy tonight and expecting a large party, so we’re seating the tables instead of leaving them up for grabs.” The server called back as he lead them to the rear of the bar.

“You want to get food here?”

“It’s your favorite bar, so I’m going to forgo my misgivings for the night and indulge you.” She shrugged.

As they reached the back of the bar, a curtain was drawn across the sometimes “private room,” which was really just an alcove in the back of the bar.

“Let me just draw back the curtain to free up some more space for you two.” The server pulled the string and the curtains began to part.

In that moment, Jon wasn’t quite sure what he felt. His eyes met Sam’s first. Then fell on Pyp. Pyp! As he scanned the room, he realized it was full of familiar faces, too many to compute in the mere seconds he had to react.

“SURPRISE!”

Wait, what. He turned to Dany, who was donning a smile bigger than any he’d ever seen.

“I—what? Did you do this?”

She bit her lip. “I’m sorry for the charade of no one being able to hang out for your birthday, but when Pyp texted me to say he was going to be in Boston this weekend I couldn’t help myself.”

“I lo—I love it. Thank you.”

“Some of us don’t get to see you every day! Share the love buddy.” Pyp grabbed for Jon’s hand and pulled him into a half hug. “Damn, Stark, you’re looking old. Twenty six? More like Sixty twen.” He moved to place a kiss on Dany’s cheek and pull her into a friendly embrace, “way to go princess, ya really did fool him. Though, thick headed as he is, he probably wouldn’t have picked up on the hints even if you sent him an invitation.”

A figure moving behind Pyp caught Jon’s attention. _Holy Shit._ “No way. No fucking way!” He exclaimed, pushing Pyp aside. “I can’t believe it.”

“Believe it, brother.” Robb said with a smug smile.

“Robb Stark.”

“In the flesh.” They embraced in a ferocious bear hug, pulling apart but still holding onto each other’s arms.

“How did I not know you were coming! Fuck. Do mom and dad know you’re here?”

“I wasn’t supposed to make it to Boston, actually. Just a quick three day trip to New York and then back to London, but Pyp texted me about tonight and the cost to change the flight wasn’t terrible and I figured why the hell not?”

“When do you go back?”

“Sunday. Figured I may as well make a weekend of surprises and show up to whatever family celebrations you had planned tomorrow.”

“Sansa is going to be so excited to see you.”

“Hopefully mum and dad too.”

“Jury’s still out on that one.” Jon paused, “do you have a place to stay?”

“I was gonna crash at my old apartment in Somerville. Heard my brother has this new roommate that the family hasn’t met yet, so figured I’d crash on the couch and make sure this dude isn’t about to walk out with any precious family heirlooms.” 

“Absolutely! Plenty of room.”

“Let me do the right thing here and buy you a birthday beer.” As they made their way back to the bar and passed Dany, now in deep conversation with Sam and his new girlfriend Gilly, Jon couldn’t help but grab her arm and give it a quick one-two squeeze.

“So when were you planning on telling me about Persephone over there?” Robb’s breezy question easily rolled off his tongue. He raised two fingers in the air to grab the attention of the bartender, “two Harpoon IPAs, right Jon?” 

“Yes, perfect, thanks.”

“And I’ll be a gentleman, what does the lady drink?” Robb asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Oh, uhm, tonight probably a vodka soda and a splash of Chambord.” Both the bartender and Robb gave him quizzical looks.

Nodding his head, Robb said skeptically “ok, and one of whatever that is.”

“Man, it is so good to see you.” They’d seen each other at Christmas, but that was almost six months ago. There was something about having his only brother, his lifelong best friend in his city, with his group of friends that warmed Jon’s heart. “You ought to move back stateside.”

Robb chuckled and handed the bartender his card, encouraging him to keep it open. “That’s the long term plan, but don’t act so excited brother, once I’m in town the ladies will be chasing after the fairer Stark.” He paused while reaching for the drinks, handing Dany’s drink to Jon. “though, perhaps that’s not such a problem any more?” He gestured his hand back to their crowd and nudged an elbow at Jon.

Jon followed his brother’s gaze and saw Dany smiling and laughing with Gilly, who’s hands were carefully rapped around Dany’s right palm, pulling it close to her face and releasing it back.

“Well hey there fellas!” came Pyp’s voice as he wrapped one arm around Jon and another around Robb. “Family reunions just give me such warm and fuzzies. Look at us! The three amigos, back at it!”

“Pyp, has our amigo told you about the girl that brought him here?” Robb questioned as he sipped his beer.

“The princess? Ah, Robb my boy, that’s a tale of tales. And me? I’m a tale teller.” Pyp had taken his arms back, gesticulating with his right hand as he spoke, finally placing it on his heart to emphasize the final point.

“I’m going to bring the _princess_ her drink.” Jon rolled his eyes and attempted to sidle out of the conversation to no avail, the two at his tail as the made his way over to Dany and Gilly.

“My brother wanted to make a good impression, so he bought you a drink.” Jon extended his had to her in offering.

“Aw, that’s sweet. We’re almost done here, can you put it on that table?” She nodded her chin in the direction behind him.

“What is it you’re doing exactly?”

Gilly answered for her, “I’m reading her palm.”

Jon bit back a chuckle and raised an eyebrow in amusement. “Oh are you? And what does it say?”

“Well, apart from the fact that she’s going to be wildly successful in her career,” Gilly paused, turning Dany’s hand and pulling it closer to her face for examination then moved her attention back onto Dany. “Your relationship lines are a little hard to read, you’ve got three, one that is long and promising but it intersects with another. I’m new at this so I don’t know offhand what that means.”

 

“But” she continued “I can say for sure, you’ve got three child lines that cross the longest relationship line.”

Dany drew her hand back, not looking at Jon. “thanks, Gilly. That was really fun.”

“Your highness!” Pyp called as Dany reached for her drink and turned her attention. “I am delighted to introduce my favorite Stark brother; the one, the only, Mr. Robert Stark!” He finished with his best Price is Right impersonation. 

Robb extended his hand, “I’ve never met a girl Jon’s dated, but I must say, if there’s one to meet, it’s definitely you.”

Dany’s hand met Robb’s, catching it in a firm grip. “I’ve never met another Stark, but if there’s one to meet, it’s definitely you.”

“I didn't catch your name, m’lady? Unless you’d like me to call you princess or your highness, as the neanderthal does?”

“Daenerys, but all the cool people call me Dany.”

A look of understanding crossed Robb’s face. “I believe I’ve heard of Daenerys and Dany as if they were two separate people. Glad to reconcile the two. your name suits your beauty.” Robb moved their intertwined hands so that her fingers were facing him and placed a polite kiss at her knuckles.

“My parents were obsessed with Greek mythology. My father wanted to name me Dionysus, but my mother felt the God of wine was a label best left out of a child’s life.”

Robb gave her an amused grin, “Dionysus, the child of Zeus and Persephone?”

Dany took a sip of her drink and shrugged, “if you say so.” Clearly not in on the joke.

“Jon! Get over here, we just ordered shots.”

Jon’s gaze drifted from Pyp and Sam back to Dany and Robb.

“Oh Jesus, just go take your shot, we’ll be fine here.” Robb pushed his hesitant brother toward his friends.

Before Jon knew what was happening, several hours and many rounds had passed; there was much reminiscing to be done with Pyp and Sam.

Suddenly someone was tugging at his arm. “Hey, I’m so sorry to do this, but I’m going to leave. Everyone else is staying, I just hit a wall and need to crash.”

He looked down at her through glazed eyes, “you’re the best. You know that right?” He couldn’t help but gush. Tonight had been perfect and it was because of her.

Her hand grazed the side of his face, thumb tracing the line along his cheekbone from ear to cheek. “Run in the morning, right?” was all she could manage.

Nodding, he leaned down and placed a light kiss on her lips. “I’ll see you at home.” 

 

Several hours and many drinks later, Jon and Robb stumbled their way back to the apartment in Somerville. 

“Wow.”

“What?”

“This place looks different.” Robb gestured around the apartment, “look at it?”

“It looks the same. You’re crazy.” Jon was offended. This was his apartment now, and it looked the same.

“So you’re buying flowers and using coasters and have a wine rack and a compost pot? That’s all your doing, Jon?”

“I mean, some of the changes were mine.”

“You’re so lost.” Robb laughed as he dropped his duffle on the couch and began searching for pajamas. “Was hoping you’d at least have gotten a better couch in the last two years.”

“Hang on.” Jon stumbled his way to the other side of the living room and pushed in an already ajar door. Taking in the absence of light and a body in the bed, he turned back to his brother. “Take the guest room; your old room.”

Without waiting to hear his brother’s opposition or acquiescence, Jon moved to his own door, “I’ll see you in the morning.” 

Peeling garments off until the only fabric left him was his underwear, Jon climbed into his bed; slowly sliding over until his arm wrapped around Dany. In her sleep, she hummed contentedly and snuggled closer to him.

“I love that you’re not even pretending to sleep in your room anymore.” He kissed her temple and allowed the alcohol to lull his body to sleep.

______________

 

Opening his eyes to be blinded by sunlight, Jon felt Dany stirring in the bed. Rolling over, he saw she was fully awake and scrolling through Facebook on her phone.

“And how’s the patient feeling this morning?” She teased without looking at him.

Rolling to her and snaking an arm around her, Jon groaned “can you tell the troll inside my head to stop with the hammering?”

“Did you drink any water at all?”

“Does Bud Light count?”

“Well, a good night tends to mean a bad morning.” She placed her phone on the nightside table and turned to him, reaching a hand to brush his wayward tresses from his forehead. “So I guess that mean’s we’re not going on a run this morning?”

“What time is it?”

“Just after seven.”

“Christ, it’s early! We can sleep for two more hours and maybe I’ll be well enough to run.”

“You sleep. I’m going to go to a yoga class. I’ll wake you when I get back.”

“Or, you could stay in bed with me.” He proposed, trailing sloppy kisses down her neck. “That always makes me feel better.”

“It’s tempting, but we’re never going to run this half marathon if we don’t train.” She stalled his wandering hands. “If you ask nicely, I’ll even bring back coffee and breakfast sandwiches.”

“What are you still doing here, then? Hop to it.” He playfully pushed her away.

Ten minutes later Dany’s sneakers were laced up she was ready to go. Slipping out of the bedroom, she closed the door quietly behind her.

“So you’re an early riser, too?” Startled, her gaze met Robb’s across the apartment. “Sorry, didn’t mean to freak you out.”

“No, no, it’s fine, I’m just not used to having someone else here in the morning.”

“I just put on some coffee, if you’re interested.”

“Offering me coffee in my own home? I was right about you.” She joked, making her way to the stools on the living room side of the kitchen’s peninsula.

“Technically, it was my home first.”

“Touchè.”

“Where’re you off to at this hour on a Saturday morning?”

“Well, we’re supposed to be running six miles this morning, but your brother in there is going to need a little time to recover. So I was going to try and make it to a yoga class before you guys woke up.” She shrugged, “evidently not all Starks need their beauty sleep on a Saturday morning.”

“My body’s still on London time. So for me waking up at six was really like waking up at noon.”

“Well, when you put it that way…” she chuckled. “You’re a pretty big scrub then.”

“Scrubbiest of scrubs, actually.” He reached for the coffee pot, “so was that a yes or no on the coffee?”

“I’ll have to decline for now, it’ll be something to look forward to when I get back.”

“Sure I can’t tempt you with my famous french toast?”

“If we kept bread in this house, sure.”

“You don’t eat bread?”

“Ok,” Dany began, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, “we eat bread, we just don’t keep it in the house.” 

“He must really have fallen for you, letting you pull a shenanigan like that.”

Dany stiffened, “I should head out if I’m going to make it to class in time.”

“Shit, Dany. I’m sorry, I was trying to make a joke.”

She smiled at him, “no it’s fine. Don’t worry.”

“It’s weird. Seeing Jon with you. I’ve never seen him around a girl before and you bring out a side in him I don’t see often.”

“You never met, Ygritte?” Dany couldn’t help herself.

“No. Came close once, though.” Robb leaned on the counter across from her, “but I took a nasty spill on the slopes and ended up at the ER with my dad instead.”

“Oh, I heard about that New Years. You lost your footing on a mogul, right?”

Laughing at himself and shaking his head, Robb responded, “how is it you know so much about me and I just learned last night that Jon’s roommate Dany was a girl?”

“Well—“ A phone was ringing.

“Shit, sorry.” Robb picked up his phone and noticed the caller ID. “I’m gonna have to grab this, give me a sec?”

Dany moved from her perch on the stool. “I should run if I’m gonna make this class, actually. I’ll catch up with you when I get back.” She was at the door in an instant, turning and calling behind her “skip the french toast today, I’ll bring you back a bacon, egg, and cheese from our favorite place.”

As the door shut behind her, she heard Robb’s voice into the phone “hi, mum.”

Knowing he was in for quite a lashing, Dany slipped out the door to her yoga class. 

Proud of herself for accomplishing what she had by 9:13 A.M., Dany pulled her soon to be aching legs up the stairs of her apartment, keys in hand and tray of coffee topped with a bag of breakfast sandwiches in the other. As she moved to unlock the door, she realized all it needed was a little push to open.

Thinking nothing of the door, Dany slipped her keys back into her purse and made her way into the apartment, “Alright boys, I’ve got some fancy coffee and breakfast sandwiches!” As she finished her cheerful call, she rotated her head up and came face to face with seemingly the entire Stark family.

“Oh, I’m sorry, um, I didn’t—“

“You.” came the voice of the tall redhead.

Moving forward and attempting to ignore the venom, “me. I’m—“ 

“I know exactly who you are.” The look of disgust could not have been more penetrating. “What I don’t know is why you’re here. What the hell is this, Jon?”

Unsure of what to do and where to go, Dany placed the tray of coffee and the bag of sandwiches on the counter. “Ok. Maybe I should go. Leave you some family time.” Before Dany could make a move, the redhead spoke again.

“The two of you are disgusting.”

“Sansa!” It was the oldest man in the room, presumably Jon’s father. Dany took note that Jon said nothing.

“Why should I mind my P’s and Q’s,” Sansa rolled her eyes as she spoke, “they clearly have no regard for the feelings of those that care about them anyway.”

“Sansa!” came Catelyn’s attempted reprimand. “What has gotten into you?”

“This is Daenerys, the girl Jon was fucking while he was with Ygritte.” Sansa explained, drawing her hand in Dany’s direction passionately.

“Alright, Sansa, that is enough.” Ned boomed, slicing the air with his arm. Turning to Dany, he began, “I apologize sincerely for my daughter’s outburst. I presume you are Jon’s roommate Dany?”

“Yes.” She paused, unsure of the proper way to continue this awkward introduction and settling on, “I’ve heard a lot about you.”

“Jon,” it was Catelyn who spoke this time, “is Sansa correct in this? And have you been living with a woman since last August and allowing us to think it was a male friend named Dany?”

The Stark family had their favorites and Dany knew early into their meeting that she wasn’t one.

Jon was looking down at the ground, “yes.”

“Yes to which?” Catelyn demanded.

“Yes to both.”

“Bet this wasn’t what you had in mind when you suggested a birthday dinner in the city.” Arya quipped. Dany bit back a laugh, despite the situation.

“Arya, now is not the time.”

Raising her eyebrows, she answered. “Dad, look at this situation. When _would_ be the time?”

Robb’s eyes met Dany’s as he gave her a sympathetic smile. “Why don’t we all take a second to breathe here?” He suggested.

Pulling her coffee from the tray and grabbing her sandwich from the bag, Dany regained her composure, “you know, I have errands to run and I don’t want to intrude here, so I’m just gonna slip out and let you work through,” she paused unsure of her words, “this.” She gestured between all of them.

Without another word, she slipped out the door and made sure to pull it completely shut. Leaning against the door and closing her eyes a moment she thought to herself, _what the fuck was that?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whew. 
> 
> There's definitely more to this, but the chapter was getting long and this felt like a good place to break.
> 
> #welcometotheconflict
> 
> I know there's been some confusion on the timeline, so let me clarify a little here:  
> Jon and Ygritte break up in early 2008; Ygritte is in her final year of school.  
> Jon and Dany were in London in Fall 2005, the Fall of their Junior year.  
> Ygritte went to Italy Fall 2006, the fall of her Junior year.  
> Dany moved to Boston in August of 2010.  
> Jon's birthday is June, and therefore this chapter takes place in 2011.
> 
> We also got a LITTLE Dany POV in this one.
> 
> As always, you _**wonderful**_ readers have warmed my heart with all of your kind words  <3


	7. Let Your Heart Hold Fast

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song for this chapter: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kBqWtdMpies

“So, Sam, you’re moving to Boston too?” Catelyn asked over her salad.

“Oh, ah, yes. Hopefully sometime this summer or fall. I’ve got to start studying for the MCATs and start the process of applying to Med-Schools.” Sam mumbled awkwardly, “Jon’s lucky this is the end of the road. For me this is only the halfway point.”

“That’s not a bad thing,” Ned affirmed, taking a deliberate sip of his beer, “you have direction, son. That’s an honorable quality. Don’t spend too much time worrying about what’s left to come. You’ve gotten yourself this far, you’ll manage.”

“Thank you, sir.”

“If and when you make it to Boston, make sure Jon invites you to the cape house some weekend in the summer. We’ve plenty of room and Cat loves to entertain.”

“I do love a house filled with happy voices.” She smiled at Sam. “And perhaps your ambition will rub off on our youngest son, here.”

“Can we not do this tonight?” This was the same conversation he’d been having with his parents for the better part of a year now.

“Jon, there’s always a place at the firm for you.” Ned said matter-of-factly.

“I understand that, dad, and I appreciate it. But I am not interested in finance. I’m sorry, but you’re going to be stuck with only one son to leave that legacy to.”

“Jon,” his mother’s voice was calm but firm, “we don’t expect you to follow in your father or Robb’s footsteps. We just want you to find a direction. We don’t want you to waste your talent.”

A reassuring hand squeezed his leg. Turning to face it’s owner, he gave his favorite redhead a small smile. When his parents suggested they do his celebratory graduation dinner the night before graduation, he hoped it may’ve meant a reprieve from this conversation.

When Sam popped his head out of his bedroom and came face to face with the Stark family for the first time, as they were about to leave, his parents would hear nothing of him _staying home for a quiet night._

That’s how they ended up here with his roommate and his girlfriend and minus his brother. If only Robb were here, he’d help elevate some of the tension with their parents. Or at least draw some of the focus of the conversation about the family business away from Jon.

“Can we at least pause this conversation until they hand me my diploma?”

“Oh, so you _are_ getting one tomorrow?” 

Unable to hid his grin, Jon threw a small piece of bread across the table at his little sister, who stuck her tongue out at him in return. 

“Arya, do not even think of throwing food across the table back at him.”

“You realize _I’m_ the younger one?”

“Be a good girl for the night, little sister. It’s _my_ night.” Jon smiled mischievously at her.

“Actually, I think _tomorrow_ is your day. But who’s counting?”

“Ygritte,” Catelyn interrupted, “will next year be difficult without Jon?”

Turning away from her side conversation with Sansa, Ygritte made quick eye contact with Jon before answering, “it always sucks being away from this face.” She squeezed his chin between her thumb and index finger and shook it from side to side, “but we’ve managed pretty well the last couple times. Plus, who knows,” she shrugged, “maybe with him gone I’ll meet some stunning underclassman who’ll sweep me off my feet.” She ended with a nudge and a wink.

“I”m sure you’ll have plenty of visits with each other.” Ned commented.

“When she’s not visiting me!” Sansa interrupted, “or, me her.”

“You came to Amherst exactly three times in my four years here.” Jon looked at her skeptically.

“Yes, but Wesleyan is closer to Amherst than home.”

“And she likes me better.” Ygritte said into her glass; smiling innocently at Jon.

“True.” Sansa’s tone carried an air of facetiousness but Jon knew there was some truth to it. Sansa was his sister and he loved her, but he would never have invited her up for a weekend this spring if it weren’t for Ygritte’s insistence.

“Jon tells us you’re going to be spending the summer in D.C.?” Ned broke the silence.

“Yes! I somehow landed an internship for Representative Lincoln of Vermont. I’ll be there for eight weeks this summer.”

“That’s really great work, your parents must be very proud.” Catelyn smiled warmly.

“It’s all they can talk about to the neighbors. I have a feeling it’s going to be pretty embarrassing at home.” Ygritte always beamed when she spoke about politics, a fire lit within her. Jon admired that about her, from the first moment they’d met, she knew exactly what she wanted to do and made efforts to achieve that goal.

Grateful for the shift in conversation, Jon slipped back in his chair and allowed himself to be a spectator for the remainder of the meal.

Before he knew what was happening, his parents had dropped him, Sam, and Ygritte off at his apartment and bid their farewells amid the obligatory jokes about the next time they saw him, he’d be a college graduate.

Standing on the deck as Sam unlocked the door, Ygritte tugged back the sleeve of Jon’s shirt. As he turned to face her he heard the door open and shut behind him.

“I’m gonna go back to my dorm for the night.”

“What? No. Stay.”

“It doesn’t feel right. I know how your family is about this stuff and I’m gonna have to sit with them all day tomorrow.”

“We’ve snuck around in my parents’ house plenty of times…”

Her gaze ping-ponged from the wood of the deck up to where the siding met the roof before finally meeting his own. “I know, but somehow it feels more…” She paused in thought, both hands slipped in the back pockets of her jeans, “…more like your family trusts me? Like, I don’t know, maybe they don’t think we ever snuck around when they weren’t paying attention. I guess something about tonight feels important, like I could mess something up.” She moved her hands to his shoulders and leaned to place a chaste kiss on his cheek, coming down she said “I don’t want to mess this up.”

Not knowing what else to say and feeling a rock in his stomach, “let me walk you back then?” Jon offered, extending his elbow, “it’s the chivalrous thing to do.”

Ygritte smiled and gladly accepted.

On his walk back across campus, Jon decided to take his time. He wandered past his favorite buildings, stopped outside his freshman dorm, and found himself at memorial hill; the quintessential spot for Amherst. At least during daylight. At this hour he was going to have to imagine the sprawling trees and rolling hills.

Slipping his hands inside the pockets of his fleece and taking a seat, Jon tried not to think about what tomorrow was going to bring. What was he going to do after tomorrow? Why did it seem so easy for everyone else to figure out?

“Well, isn’t this cliché”

Startled, Jon turned and saw Dany, silhouetted by the amber lights behind her. After allowing a minute for his eyes to adjust, he noticed she was wearing sweatpants and a sweatshirt. Uncharacteristic. 

Inhaling a laugh, Jon said “couldn’t resist one last look?”

Moving to sit next to him Dany countered with, “couldn’t sleep.”

Exhaling deeply, Jon looked at her and back and the unseeable view ahead of them, “gonna be tough to leave all of this behind.”

“I don’t know. I think there’s a time and a place for everything, and I’m ready to move on from this.”

Slightly offended, Jon looked at her “you’re not going to miss,” he paused, drawing his hand in circles in front of him, “any of _this?_ ”

You’re not going to miss me? Is what he really wanted to ask.

“I’ll look back on it fondly, of course.” She shrugged, “I’ve met great people, made great memories, but nothing in life lasts forever and trying to prolong a good thing only ruins it, Jon.”

Deciding he wasn’t up for a debate, Jon changed course, “do you go home tomorrow? Or are you going straight to New York?”

Their relationship this semester had been distant to say the least, but they’d kept in polite social contact.

Slipping her hands into the front of her sweatshirt, pushing them down, and leaning forward, Dany’s usual confidence was absent. “Home?” She laughed, bitterly. “What home?”

_Huh? ___

__“Wait, what do you mean?”_ _

__“I”m going to New York tomorrow. I’ll spend the summer there before I start school.”_ _

__“Why can’t you go home?”_ _

__He couldn’t see her body underneath the loose clothes, but he knew her muscles tightened at the question._ _

__“Home is a place where people who come from happy upbringings go.”_ _

__This was the most she’d spoken about her upbringing in the time he’d known her. Every time it had come up in the past, she’d changed the subject or made it clear she didn’t want to discuss her childhood. He wasn’t sure whether to ask for more or to let her continue as she wanted._ _

__Uncomfortable silence never being Jon’s strong suit, he couldn’t help but question, “were you…?”_ _

__“Abused? No. Never.”_ _

__“Dany, I—“ _What the fuck was he supposed to say,_ “I don’t understand.” _Please tell me more.__ _

__“There are so many fucked up things happening in this world. You know that right?” She paused to look at him, but not long enough for him to answer, “we’re walking out of here, our generation preparing to take over the world,” her hand tucked inside the torn cuff of her sleeve as it reached up to wipe unshed tears from her eyes._ _

___Tears?_ _ _

__“…and all I can think about is that there will be no one to see me graduate.”_ _

__“No one’s….?”_ _

__“My dad passed away my senior year of high school.”_ _

__“Dany. I’m so sorry. Why didn’t you tell me?” Jon slid closer to her, slowing sliding an arm around her back. “Fuck, I’m sorry.”_ _

__Learning into his embrace, Dany dipped her head on his shoulder, “my mother hates me.” The statement left little room for debate._ _

__“I’m sure that’s not true.” Jon tried anyway. The rare occasion where she’d briefly mentioned her parents, the memories seemed fond. _Plus how could anyone hate Daenerys?_ _ _

__Jon felt her chuckle before she spoke. “Oh, I can promise it’s true.” She gave a deep breath, “my parents tried to have kids for years before I came along.”_ _

__“Well that doesn’t mean—“_ _

__“—nothing changed until my mother was working late and was sexually assaulted by a coworker.”_ _

__Jon pulled back immediately, looking down at her face. “What?” Was all he could manage. His heart was beating faster than he could register. He was immediately out of breath. He felt simultaneously angry, heartbroken, and devastated._ _

__“My father, who raised me and loved me more than anyone has ever loved me, was not my _father._ ” _ _

__Pause._ _

__“My parents were both heavily religious, so when my mother became pregnant afterward, they saw it as a sign and I grew into a person. The way he tells it.” She paused, correcting herself, “told it. The second he saw me he fell more in love than he’d ever been in his life.”_ _

__“Your dad was a good guy then.”_ _

__Dany’s hands had found each other, index fingers and thumbs intertwining and pulling. “He was the best of guys.”_ _

__“What happened?”_ _

__“He died because he was old and his heart was bad and he could’ve taken better care of himself. But he didn’t.”_ _

__“Dany—“_ _

__“It’s really weird. When you learn a parent has died.” She turned to her gaze from her hands up to him, “your mind doesn’t do the things you think it would.”_ _

__“What do you mean?”_ _

__“The first thing I thought about was that I had a huge assignment due that week and it wasn’t done and now I wasn’t going to have time to work on it. Then I realized that the only black dress I owned was dirty and the dry cleaners were already closed. I was so mad at myself for not being more responsible and getting it cleaned before that.”_ _

__“That sounds pretty normal to me.”_ _

__“My mother was completely useless. Couldn’t stop crying about it and made sure anyone within earshot knew how upset she was and why.”_ _

__“She’d just lost her husband, that seems pretty normal to me too.”_ _

__Dany shook her head and rolled her eyes up to the sky, holding back tears. “It was dramatic. It was about her. She never asked how I felt in any of it. Why would she?”_ _

__“Your mother?” It was a dumb question, he knew. But what was he supposed to say? In four years of on and off closeness, he’d never seen this much vulnerability from the woman in front of him._ _

__“When I was little, she tried. She really did. But as I got older she would get weirdly jealous of my relationship with my dad. It got worse when my dad died.”_ _

__“How?”_ _

__“She tolerated me on the best days.” Dany shrugged, “so when it came time for me to leave for college, she helped me pack up my car and politely asked that I never find my way back. She was so sorry to have to ask and she knew it was going to hurt me. She loved me in the way she could, but seeing me was just too painful. I was a daily reminder of two of the worst things she’d lived through in her life. She wished me the best.”_ _

__Dany stood and moved to the ledge, looking out at the darkness._ _

__Waiting for the news to settle and realizing it never would, Jon followed suit and wrapped his arms around her from behind, leaning his chin on her shoulder and placing a kiss on her cheek._ _

__“I’m sorry for laying this all on you.” Her hands moved to cover his at her waist, “I just needed to tell _someone._ ”_ _

__“Does no one know?”_ _

__“Missy does. I’ve spent most summers and holidays with her and her family and they’re great and understanding, but there’s always a sense of _pity_. Please don’t pity me, Jon.”_ _

__“Honestly?” He leaned to the side so he could look in her eyes, “I admire you. I don’t know that I’d be on my way to Fordham for grad school given your circumstances. Dany, I know things have been,” he paused, looking for the right word, “ _confusing_ between us but I am really proud of you. I—“_ _

__She pulled out of his embrace and put distance between them, “don’t say it, Jon.” Her tone was even, unflinching._ _

__Defiant, “I love you.” Jon finished._ _

__“It doesn’t change anything.”_ _

__“Why not?”_ _

__“I’m going to New York, you’re going to Boston, and you have a girlfriend somewhere on this campus.”_ _

__“What if none of those things were a factor? Would that change things?”_ _

__“They _are_ a factor, though. You’re going to walk across the stage tomorrow and then you’re going to take a picture with Ygritte, and you’re going to feel guilty for this.” She gestured between them, “and you’re going to feel guilty about feeling guilty.”_ _

__“I—“_ _

__“Your trajectory is set, Jon. You’ll move to Boston and in a year Ygritte will move in with you and in three years you’ll get engaged and in five years you’ll have kids and you’ll do what’s right and what’s expected of you.”_ _

__“What if I don’t want all those things with Ygritte?” Jon snapped. He’d never said the words aloud, barely ever permitted the thought to enter his mind. “I know it’s what I’m supposed to do, what everyone expects me to do, what I should want. Ygritte gets along with my family better than I do sometimes, but I just, I don’t know. I feel like I don’t have a choice.”_ _

__“You always have a choice. You chose a year and a half ago. So did I.”_ _

__“So, that’s it then?” The thought suddenly terrified him. Would he ever seen her again?_ _

__“Probably. Tomorrow we’re becoming different people, may as well leave the mistakes of these people in the past.” She said it with finality._ _

__Walking over to her, Jon framed his hands around her face, rubbing his thumbs along her cheeks and under her eyes where the tears had dried. Wordlessly, he drew her to him, their lips briefly meeting in a tender but sad kiss._ _

__Afterward, he held the embrace for a moment longer, “I needed to say it, Dany. I needed to say it even if it was just once.”_ _

__As Jon slid away, Dany’s hand trailed along his arm before catching his hand and giving it a firm squeeze._ _

__Jon walked back the way he’d come, forcing his gaze to remain firmly planted on what lay ahead._ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yikes.
> 
> Dany's got some _baggage_
> 
> Hopefully this explains a little of why she's a bit closed off. We will get into her issues a little more later in the story as well.
> 
> I know you all want to pick up after the apartment scene, and we will. But this story wants to be told this way.
> 
> I cannot express how much your thoughtful comments have meant to me! Don't be afraid to question me either :)
> 
> Uncharacteristically, I've actually got chunks of the next two chapters written, so we'll see how quickly those want to write themselves.
> 
> I hope you enjoy(ed)! Happy Saturday!


	8. Someday, Someway

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song for this chapter: Someday, Someway-Marshall Crenshaw.
> 
> Link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hWqcn-qbFok

_Nants ingonyama bagithi baba_  
Sithi uhhmm ingonyama  
Ingonyama 

Dany rolled over in her bed and pulled a pillow over her head. 

_Siyo Nqoba_  
Ingonyama  
Ingonyama nengw' enamabala 

The music just got louder.

“Are you fucking kidding me, Margery? It’s too early for this shit on a Saturday!”

“Oh, come on Dany, get your ass out here and sing with me!”

Resigning herself to the fact that sleep would allude her for the remainder of the morning, Dany reluctantly pulled herself out of bed and made her way to the kitchen, violently ripping her roommate’s iPod off of the speaker.

“Well, good morning to you.” Margery quipped.

“I was _planning_ on sleeping in today. It’s the one day this week I don’t have early class or work.”

“Well, I made coffee and put cinnamon in it.” Margery paused and repeated herself, “cinnamon in it, cinnamoninit. That’s kinda fun to say!”

“Well, long as I’m up, may as well.”

“You’re in quite a mood for someone who hasn’t even seen Facebook yet.” 

“Why would I care what’s on facebook?”

“I was hoping you’d ask, actually.” Margery smugly smiled and opened her laptop, “ahem! _For anyone wondering the kind of People Jon Stark and Daenerys Targaryen are, they’ve been sneaking around behind Ygritte Snow for three years. Feel free to share this with any party that should be in the know.”_

Dany nearly dropped the mug in her hand. “WHAT.” Double speed, she was at the counter with Margery, pulling the laptop to face her.

“Holy fucking shit.”

“I know, I can’t believe this girl randomly capitalized the P in people.”

“That’s your reaction to this?”

“As someone who takes offenses against the English language the way you do, I’m honestly surprised you’re not more horrified.”

“I mean, yes, that’s offensive, for sure.” Margery was right, this girl had capitalized a random word, Dany rationalized.

“So, wanna tell me who Jon Stark is and why you’ve been sneaking around with him for three years?”

“He’s a friend from college.”

“A friend,” Margery questioned, “or a _friend?_ ”

“A misunderstanding.”

“Girllll.”

“Don’t do that.”

“Ok, honestly. What’s the deal? He’s not the guy who came by last summer, is he?” Margery tapped her fingers on the counter in thought. “No, that guy. Ugh what was his name?”

“Drogo.”

“Yes! That’s it! Drogo! It’s not him right?”

“No, Drogo is definitely not Jon Stark.”

“But you two dated in college didn’t you? Did he know about this Jon character?”  
“Thanks for telling me.” Dany ended the conversation before Margery had a chance to object, stalking back into her room and sitting on the bed, opening up her laptop.

The words stared at her from the screen. She knew she should delete the post, Jon would never see it since they weren’t Facebook friends anymore; thanks to her.

But…there was a small part of her, minuscule really, that was curious. What happened? How’d this finally come to light? After so long?

Unable to contain her curiosity, Dany picked up her phone and waited for Facebook to load; for all the hubbub about this new and magic iphone, the things sure were slow.

Finally navigating to the page and grabbing a screenshot, she debated one more time, her conscious telling her to leave well enough alone, but another part of her—which part she was not sure—needed to know. To hear it from the horse’s mouth.

Without further thought she pulled up a message, grateful that she’d never deleted Jon’s number, and pasted the picture.

What to say though? 

Thank your girlfriend for throwing me under the bus? _No, that was too aggressive_. 

I’m here if you need to talk? _But was she?_

Why did I get pulled into this? _You know why._

“I’m guessing things aren’t going so great with Ygritte?” _That could work. It’s jovial and slightly friendly but also poses the question she wanted the answer to._

Hitting send before she lost the nerve, Dany put down her phone. But what if he gets the wrong idea? Fuck. No, I can’t let him think that I’m happy about this—but am I? I can’t be too eager. It’s not like i’ve been waiting on this relationship to end, she thought. I have other things going on in my life—but do you?  
Grabbing her phone and feeling a mild disappointment at a lack of immediate response from Jon, Dany quickly drafted a follow up text. 

“Today’s probably a rough day for you. And I’m really sorry for that.” Pause. _What to say next?_ “But if it makes you feel any better, I literally just became friends with the guy I’ve been crushing on in my ethics class. So I’m pretty sure that’s out.” _Ok, that’s perfect._

But should you add one slight piece of reassurance in there? This girl did call him out, though admittedly on your Facebook.

“Also, Jon, this girl capitalized the “P” in people. In the middle of a sentence. WTF.”

Just hit send, just do it. Her finger hit the send button (could it even still be called a button?).

They hadn’t spoken since their terse words the morning of graduation. How would he take her outreach after so many months? Perhaps she shouldn’t have reached out.

Her phone buzzed.

Closing her eyes and bracing for the worst, Dany picked up her phone.

The message was short, but lighthearted, “millennials…” 

Her heart stopped for the briefest of seconds, a flutter in her stomach.

Taking a deep breath and closing her eyes for a moment, Dany attempted to calm her nerves. She had classwork to focus on, something far more important that this.

Stepping out of her room a few minutes later, she found Margery seated on the futon in their living room, hunched over her computer. No looking up, she said “this Contemporary Issues in Humanitarian Action course is going to be the death of me, I can already feel it.”

Zipping up her jacket, Dany glanced at the course book on the table, “it’s not as bad once you get into a rhythm of the class, I promise.”

“You’re going for a run today? You’ll freeze. Jesus, if I'd known you were one of those crazies who went running in the dead of winter, I might not've let you move in. Now I'm going to feel guilty for eating peanut butter cups for breakfast.”

“It’s actually pretty mild out today, I just need to get some energy out and clear my head before I start work in my paper.”

Intrigued, Margery leaned back, pushing her glasses down to the end of her nose, “any chance the reason you need to clear your head has dark curly hair?”

“Did you Facebook stalk him?” There was a slight edge to her voice.

“You wouldn’t give me the details, so I needed an answer for myself. His profile is remarkably public. He is cute, for what it’s worth.”

Dany was intrigued, but wouldn’t allow that to show to Margery. 

“Though, his photo is of him and who I’m guessing is Ygritte? She’s not so bad herself. Seems like your boy has good taste in women.” She winked.

“He’s not my boy.” Was all the response Dany could manage as she untangled her earbuds and searched for a playlist on her ipod.

“Alright, enjoy your run while I die amidst this classwork.”

 

_______________________________

 

A bell dinged above Dany’s head as she entered the quaint cafe and a refreshing burst of cool air hit her heated skin. Halfway through her second summer in New York City and she still wasn’t used to the oppressive heat that radiated from the concrete. Scanning the crowded tables, she found the familiar figure she was looking for.

Twisting and turning to avoid chairs, children, and strollers, she made her way to the back as he rose to greet her, “Hey gorgeous!” He exclaimed as he pulled her into a warm embrace.

She smiled into his torso, “are you ever gonna stop calling me that?”

Pulling apart and taking his seat, he flashed a toothy grin, “depends. You ever gonna stop looking like that?”

Shaking her head and giving him a playful eye roll, she took her seat across from him.

“I took the liberty of ordering your coffee, hopefully you still like the fancy ones.” His hand waived over the contents of the table.

“Soy?”

“Oh, shit, I forgot that piece of it!” He raised an eyebrow playfully.

With feigned hesitance, she brought the porcelain mug to her lips and took a languid sip. A mixture of cinnamon, vanilla, and nutmeg assaulted her taste buds. It was perfection.

Replacing the oversized cup to it’s saucer, she mused to herself how much their drink choices defined their character. She a venti cinnamon dolce latte with soy in a for here cup, he a tall black coffee with sugar in the raw in a to-go cup, lid removed.

“Fuck, it’s good to see you, Dany.” His hands moved to draw his long—much longer—hair away from his face and behind his ears.

“I’ve missed you too, Drogo.” She really had. “Though I do appreciate this annual trip to New York of yours which seems to be turning into a tradition.”

“Fully by happenstance, actually. I had some extra vacation days and GnR was playing downtown, couldn’t pass it up.”

“Or, is it just an excuse to see me?” she smiled at him.

“Dollface, I wouldn’t need an excuse to want to see you.”

“You don’t need to flatter me so much either, then.”

Changing the subject, “how’s school going? How long you got left?”

She had to stifle a groan at the question, “two and a half more semesters, then my internship. So, if all goes according to plan, I’ll have my degree in the spring of 2010.”

“Think you can handle this city for that much longer?”

“Honestly, it grows on you.”

Casting his gaze dramatically, skeptically, around the room and he replied, “I mean, the people are so nice and welcoming.”

“You get used to it. You can’t beat the delivery at 2 A.M., being able to pick up a bottle of wine at a convenience store, the culture you’re exposed to just by stepping outside your apartment door…”

“All things I’ve never heard you gush about before, admittedly.” He chuckled into his coffee, adding “especially the 2 A.M. takeout.”

“Delivery has been a godsend during all night study or writing sessions.”

“Sounds like you’ve been living a pretty exciting social life, then?”

“Ha! My life pretty much revolves around school, my job, and school work.”

“No new love on the horizon?” At her dubious expression, he laughed. “Can’t blame a guy for asking.”

“If I had, would you want to beat him or befriend him?”

“I suppose it depends on who the he was.”

“Good thing there’s no he to speak of then, huh?” He was treading dangerous water, and probably knew it. “What about you? How’s work? How are things with….?” She couldn’t remember his latest girlfriend’s name.

“Marie, and they’re good. You’ve got to meet her sometime.”

“Sometime.” She agreed.

“So, what’s the story with that business on Facebook a few months back?”

He just couldn’t leave well enough alone, could he. “What business?”

“We gonna play that game?” 

_God damn him for knowing her tricks._

Shrugging, “I don’t know. I apparently pissed off some girl from two hundred miles away.”

“Might the issue she was pissed off at you about have started from three thousand miles away?”

“Why are you suddenly so interested in this?”

Pulling out his blackberry and scrolling for a minute, Drogo seemed to find what he was searching for and handed it over to her.

An email.

From Ygritte to Drogo.

“What the fuck?”

“Read it.”

Squelching the irritation that began to fester in her belly, Dany’s eyes scanned the message, only absorbing half of the content.

_Sorry to do this to you….I had no idea…I know you two are still close….I feel like I’ve been living a lie…can’t trust anyone….heartbroken…_

Looking up at him, appalled, she had to know. “Did you reply to her?”

“Of course I did. I might not’ve known her but that girl was in pain, Dany.”

“What’d you tell her?”“The truth.” He sipped his coffee. She remained silent, waiting on him to elaborate. “I told her I found out pretty much when it started, that we’d had an honest relationship and I offered empathy for her pain.”

Dany wanted to throw up. “I didn’t expect you to be drawn into this.”

“Really?” He challenged.

“No, of course not.” She assured.

“Dany, look.” He leaned forward and placed his hands flat on the table. “You’re a little fucked up.”

“Well, thanks.”

“You know it, I know it. I love you and I care about you, but I realized early on into dating you that you weren’t about to walk around on my arm and call me your boyfriend. So, I took what you gave until I realized our love was better left platonic.”

“I’m a lot fucked up.” She relented.

“Have you talked to Stark since this whole shitshow?”

Preparing to deny any contact, Dany squared her shoulders. 

“So yes, then?”

“How do you do that?”

“Your poker face isn’t as good as you think it is, Targaryen.”

“Only right after I saw the post.”

“Full truth.”

“Fine! And a couple times since. Completely harmless though.”

Drogo leaned forward on his elbow and gave her one of his full face smiles. “I’ll never know how that scrawny boy dug himself under your skin so deep.”

“It doesn’t matter now, it’s all in the past anyway.”

“The way he flashed his fangs at me when I surprised you at graduation would imply differently,” he challenged. “Homeboy was straight up dripping with jealousy. He’s lucky that girlfriend of his didn’t see him right then.”

“So it’s my fault?”

“You didn’t help the situation.”

“I wasn’t the one lying to my girlfriend.”

“Cop out.”

Pouting, she took another sip of her coffee.

“Put yourself in her shoes; she’s a nice girl from a small town who meets a nice boy from a small town, she falls in love with him and gives him her full trust.”

“Well that’s her first mistake.”

“Trusting him?”

“Trusting him _fully_.” She implored. “You can never fully rely on anyone but yourself.”

“Jesus, Dany. Your emotional baggage is going to be the death of you.”

“I was burned, I learned. I grew. It’s not my fault she didn’t. Maybe this will be her lesson.”

“You’ve got a bleak view of humanity, my dear.”

“I’m getting my master’s in Humanitarian Studies, I aim to _help_ humanity.” She said it a little too defensively. As an afterthought, she added, “my dear.”

Unfazed by her coolness, “you’re saying you don’t feel the slightest bit badly about the situation? The tiniest bit of guilt?”

Her face went stoic, her muscles tight. “No.”

“You’re so fucking transparent, it’s ridiculous.” He shook his head, “but you’re right, I didn’t come here to spend the whole time discussing this. Let’s take a walk and get some fresh air, huh?”

“High Line park isn’t very far from here, it’s still under construction, but part of it just opened last month and I’ve been dying to get there.”

“Lead the way.”

 

___________________________________________

She met Daario on New Years.

That bar she worked at was at capacity, as would be expected. She was about to cut out at the end of her 12 hour shift, when her boss asked if she’d help cover the bar for another hour. Exhausted, but knowing she’d basically be throwing money away by refusing, she agreed and slipped her off her jacket.

One hour turned into two, then three, and before she knew it the ball had dropped and the crowd was thinning. He’d caught her eye earlier in the night, with his cocky smile and dimples to boot.

He met her as she was making her way around the bar to finally go home.

“Have a drink with me.” It wasn’t a question.

She was tempted but, “thanks but not tonight.”

“One drink.”

“Some of us have been working all night, while you’ve been drinking. Maybe another time.”

“Then let me buy you something to eat.” When he spoke, confidence oozed off of him.

“Persistent, aren't we.”

“If you’d like to, of course.”

“Has plying a woman with mozzarella sticks ever gotten you into her bed?”

“I’ll tell you in the morning.”

There was something about the way he said it that endeared her; his words weren’t said with malice. What was it? Smug amusement? Or was it amused smugness? It was as if was testing her.

Over a burger and fries at a diner down the street, he explained that he was the project manager at a construction site in mid-town. His crew had to work late tonight due to unforeseen setbacks earlier in the week and he had forgone his New Years plans to buy them a few drinks.

Conversing with him was easy—he liked to talk about himself, which was ideal. The fact that he wasn’t painful to look at also didn’t hurt. It seemed no surprise to him when she invited herself to spend what remained of the night with him. 

Perhaps it was due to the fact that she hadn’t had a man’s hands on her body in longer than she’d like to admit but truth be told, she was surprised at how attentive of a lover he was. Secretly, she expected an experience that would yield a fun story to gossip about with Margery or Missy.

Even more surprised was she, when he called a few days later and invited her for sushi. He took her to his favorite sushi place—he had a favorite sushi place—and insisted she try his favorite sashimi, “I promise you’ll love it.” He’d said. “And if you don’t I’ll buy you anything else on the menu.” Of course she’d loved it.

By the time her birthday rolled around in April, they’d fallen into a comfortable habit. He was busy with his project and she had the ample space she desired to focus on school work, her job at the bar, and in general not feel oppressed.

When he surprised her with a trip to Lake Placid for her birthday, she was genuinely excited to spend the weekend with him and not thinking about the stresses in her life.

The scenery was beautiful, despite the remaining chill in the air. He’d planned a beginner level hike for them, but not fifteen minutes in both decided they weren’t that great with nature and turned back; deciding they’d rather get lost in the curves of each other’s bodies than an overgrown path in the forest.

She woke on Sunday, her actual birthday, filled with energy and ready to take on the day. Slipping out of bed and dressing quickly, she made her way to the lobby restaurant to procure coffee for both herself and Daario.

Standing counter, waiting on the drinks to be ready, her phone buzzed. Pulling it out of her pocket and anticipating a message from one of her friends, her stomach flipped and her heartbeat seemed to stop for a second.

It was a message from Jon.

_Jon Stark._

They’d exchanged a few pleasant texts here and there over the course of the last year or so, but she hadn’t heard from him since before Christmas.

Opening the message, Dany barked out a loud laugh at it’s contents. 

It was a picture of her, from their time in London, head on the table of one of the dingy pubs they’d frequented, passed out. Underneath it he’d written, “ _Happy Birthday! Hope your night ends like this._ ”

Debating on what to say in return, the barista called “Daenerys!”

Slipping her phone back into her pocket and retrieving the cups, she made her way to the elevator. It wasn’t until the elevator dinged in arrival that she remembered she and Jon weren’t friends on Facebook and he therefore had remembered her birthday.

When she made it back to the room, Daario was dressed and had turned the on TV. He smiled at her when she walked in, “wake up juice!” He happily took the coffee from her hand and pulled her down for a quick kiss. “Happy Birthday,” he said when she pulled back.

She forced a smile, “thank you.” But was suddenly annoyed by everything about him. His hair was too long, that stupid way he always almost winked at her when he smiled and why couldn’t he just put on a fucking shirt.

“I was thinking, maybe we take our time getting back to the city tonight?”

“I wish I could, but I really need to get back. The semester ends in three weeks and I have a meeting with my advisor tomorrow.”

“Dany, it’s your birthday.”

“I hadn’t noticed.” She mumbled, moving about the room packing her belongings.

“I’m trying to spend time with you here, no need to give me that.”

He was right. “I’m sorry.” She grasped his hand reassuringly, “I’m at peak stress levels right now. I haven’t gotten an internship for next spring yet and I’m very nervous about the course I’m going to be taking in the fall.” She knew full well that was only part of the reasoning.

Appeased, he smiled and kissed her temple, “don’t let it happen again.”

_________________________________

It was after that trip that Dany pulled back from Darrio, worried he was getting the wrong impression of what they were and what she wanted them to be.

At his insistence, after the semester ended they went to a celebratory dinner. It was there that she told him she was going to spend the summer traveling; first to spend time with her friend Missy in Denver and then to visit a friend in San Francisco.

“Will you want get in touch with me when you’re back?”

“Of course,” she meant it, too. She knew there was more he wanted to say, but she was no where near ready for that conversation. 

__________________________________

Dany hadn’t realized how much she missed her best friend until she was right in front of her at the airport, squeezing and pulling her into a tight embrace.

“You look exhausted.”

“Thanks, it’s great to see you too.”

“I’m your best friend, I’m allowed to tell you when you look like shit.”

As they lugged Dany’s one carryon and two suitcases through the doors, they found Grey waiting by the loading and unloading area.

“Daenerys Targareyn, as I live and breathe.” She was pulled into another hug. “Welcome to the desert!”

“I guess I wasn’t expecting _desert_.”

“We’ve got mountains too, don’t you worry.”

“I’d take this heat over the humidity of a summer in Manhattan any day of the week.” By now she was seated in the back of their car and buckling up.

“I thought you’d grown to like the city?” Missy turned in her seat.

“I had…I do.” She paused, trying to explain a feeling she didn’t quite understand. “I’m glad to have the chance to live there and experience the culture and all that it has to offer.”

“But….” Missy pushed.

“But I don’t know that I’ll be staying there long after my program is done next spring.”

“Where do you think you’ll head after that then? Would it be too forward of me to hope you’ll find your way out here?”

“Don’t let her put ideas in your head, Dany.” Grey joked as and made eye contact with her through the rear view mirror.

Dany chuckle slightly, “honestly, anything’s on the table.”

“Don’t pretend to humor me, I know you won’t end up out here.”

“Well, by the time I’m done, have applied for and been accepted into a job, you two will be moving back to the east coast.” 

Missy guffawed, “we’re out here for the long haul, my dear.”

She caught Grey’s eyes in the mirror again and he winked at her. 

They would definitely be back on the east coast.

“Well, the good news is we’re going back home for Christmas this year and I absolutely insist you attend! The family’s been asking about you.”

“I think they like you more than they do me.” Grey joked.

Dany’s time in Denver seemed to fly by. Living with her best friend again was refreshing. She enjoyed Margery’s company and it was definitely good to be close to someone in the program, but she was no Missy. Missy knew her inside and out, knew almost every secret she had, and never judged her for it.

Not only did they explore Denver and all it had to offer—including many breweries, to Dany’s feigned objection—but they showed her Boulder and spent a weekend in Colorado Springs. As their last adventure they forced her to do a bit of light hiking in the Rockies after which she was rewarded with a windy, one-lane drive up to the top of Rockie Mountain National Park. 

For the drive, Missy had insisted Dany sit in the front “to get the best view.” Shortly after beginning their ascension though, Dany realized it was less a selfless act and more so that her best friend could lay down in the back seat, close her eyes, and every so often grab at the “oh, shit” handle on the door. Apparently, her best friend did not like cliffs or heights.

As Dany stepped out of the car, finally at the peak, the first thing she noticed was just how much cooler the air was at the top.

“It feels like winter up here!”

“I am sure it’s much cooler up here in winter,” her friend teased.

“You know, we didn’t have to do this. I didn’t realize how much of a hard time you’d have on the drive up.”

“Shut up right now.” Missy scolded her, “I have a hard time with the drive up, but the view is spectacular.” She pointed in the direction of the stone wall overlooking the park.

Once they were close enough to the edge, Dany felt her breath catch in her throat. It was absolutely breathtaking. The landscape was lush green with patches of snow strewn across small areas, it looked like a painting.

“See? Totally worth it.”

“Here, let’s get a picture.” Missy moved in close to Dany as she reached her arm out with her phone, “it didn’t happen if you don’t get a picture!”

As Dany snapped a few images, Grey ran in behind them and jumped in the photo, making silly faces.

That night, Dany’s last in Colorado, they stayed in and made margaritas and tacos and laughed about all of their adventures.

Grey had long since gone to bed when Missy and Dany mixed one last batch of drinks and sat on the steps of the patio outside the apartment.

“Man, I’m going to miss you.”

Dany smiled sadly at her, “me too. I forgot how much fun it was to have you around at all times.”

“When I’m not annoying you.” Missy winked and took a sip of her drink.

Dany smiled and shook her head, “I’m going to grab the pitcher, wouldn’t want the rest of that to go to waste.” She stood and moved to the table to fetch the pitcher, her phone dinging on the step next to Missy as she did so.

“Well, who’s texting you at this hour?” Missy grabbed for the phone and read the message on the screen. “Daenerys Targaryen, you dirty liar, you!”

Sitting with the pitcher in one hand and her now full glass in another, Dany reached for her phone. “What are you talking about?”

“You’ve been talking to Jon Stark?”

_God dammit._

“I sent him the picture from the mountain today, seemed like a good idea since we all know each other.” Dany took another sip of her drink, trying to be inconspicuous.

“What about these other messages with him?”

“Did you unlock my phone!”

“Change your passcode my love, or expect that I’m going to have access to all your information. Can’t wait until I get to the nudes.” Missy wiggled her eyebrows and continued to scroll on the phone.

“This is what I get for trusting you.”

Missy stuck her tongue out and bit it between her teeth, “so does that mean you don’t want to know what he said back?”

“Couldn’t be less interested.” Dany shrugged, impassive.

“Okay then, maybe I’ll just delete the text stream.”

“Well, maybe one quick look, just to make sure he didn’t say anything terribly offensive.” Dany giggled and reached for the phone. 

Their text conversation was already on the screen. Sliding past the photo she’d sent him earlier, with the caption, “don’t be too jealous of the company I’m keeping this summer. ;)” She saw his response. 

“ _That’s quite the view. :)_ ” Followed up with, “ _The mountains and the landscape are pretty too. :)_ ”

Dany’s head titled affectionately as a smile crept to her face, before she could stop it.

“Wow, I wish someone got that excited by _just a text from_ me.”

Unable to think of a clever comeback, Dany took another sip of her margarita.

“What’s stopping you now?”

“What?”

“How often do you talk to him like that?”

“We keep in touch.” Seeing that her answer wasn’t sufficient, “I don’t know. We don’t talk often, but once in a while we’ll go back and forth a bit.”

“When you say talk?”

“Never on the phone, just through text.”

“Does this Daario character you’ve told me about know?”

“What? No. Why would he?”

“Dany, you’ve been dating him for what? Seven months now?”

“It’s not serious.”

Skeptical, Missy asked, “does he know this?”

Dany heaved a deep sigh, “I don’t know.”

“You can’t lead him on, Dany.”

“I’ve been honest with him.”

“You can’t say something’s one way, but then act the opposite.”

“I don’t do that.”

“How many times did you find yourself in Jon’s bed in college? Despite you assuming me it was _just drunk mistakes?_ ”

“What if I really like Daario? What if I want things to get serious with him?” As an afterthought, she added, “maybe?”

“Make sure he knows the maybe factor.”

“I guess I’ll see how I feel when I get back.”

“Be honest with yourself first.”

Setting her glass down and leaning to wrap her arms around her knees, Dany sighed. “Am I a bad person for what I’ve done?”

“What? No!”

“Be honest, it’s ok.” As Dany leaned forward, her undone hair cascading down her arms and in front of her face. She leaned down, brushing at her toes. “Drogo thinks I’m cold. That I lack empathy.”

“Did he say that exactly or are you twisting his words?”

“Answer the question.”

“I don’t condone your choices, but I think you’re a good person.”

“What should I have done differently?”

Missy looked at her, deadpan. “Not have sex with Jon while he was with Ygritte?”

Dany groaned, frustrated, “why is that _my_ fault though? Why is that _my_ problem? He’s the one who was tied down, not _me._ ”

Her friend tilted her head back and forth, her face showing disagreement. She lifted her hand, spread her fingers, and sea-sawed it to and fro. “Mas o menos.”

“Stop with the riddles.”

“I can’t speak for what happened in London, but the way you two interacted with each other whenever Ygritte wasn’t around? Even if I didn’t know your sordid history, I’d have felt the chemistry.”

“It was that obvious?”

“It was _that_ obvious.”

“If I’m being honest,” Dany began, her eyes focused on the ground ahead of her, “when I think about it, I feel awful. I feel bad. I _pity_ her.”

“And then you hate yourself for feeling pity.”

“You know me well.” Dany sheepishly turned her head in Missy’s direction, resting it on her knees.

“When was the last time you actually saw him? Graduation?”

“Yep, the morning of.”

“You were kind of a bitch to him that day.”

“He told me he loved me the night before.”

“What! Why have you never told me this?”

Dany shrugged, “it didn’t matter. We created our own problems.”

“Did you say anything back?”

“No.”

“Well that explains why he was so pissed when he saw Drogo.”

“Drogo and I had already realized what good friends we were.” She said, matter-of-fact, “though he didn’t know why, he knew my parents weren’t coming to graduation.”

“Who knows about your…” Missy drew circles in the air with her glass, “family situation?”

“You and Jon.”

“Convenient.”

“I don’t know what he expected. We’d said all there was to say the night before.”

“Maybe he wanted to be there for you?”

“I don’t know. Maybe.” Dany took sip of her drink.

“From my perspective, I saw him come up to you and basically immediately start yelling at you.”

“He came over to apologize. He wanted to remain friends.”

“HA! Sure that’s all he wanted.”

“He and Drogo got to me at the exact same time. I was completely blown away by Drogo being there as a surprise, I was expecting no one.”

“Did Jon say anything about that?”

“He looked so mad, Missy. He asked me if it was all an act, then. He said ‘well, glad I could keep your bed warm.’ He was so angry.”

“What’d you say?”

“I didn’t know what to say.” Dany paused and shrugged, “so I just said congratulations, good luck, and turned to give Drogo a hug.”

“So, the night before, he told you he loved you and you said nothing?” Dany nodded in confirmation, “then that day he came over and tried to be supportive, and you dismissed him?”

“I mean, if you want to give a brief summary, then I suppose you’re right.”

“Look, you’re my bestie.” Missy started, realizing her words were slightly slurred, “I’m going to support you in whatever you do. I want what’s best for you.”

“I’m exhausted.”

“Must be tough, vacationing for a living.” Missy teased.

“I’m going to need a vacation from this vacation.” Dany winked.

 

_____________________________________

Dany’s next stop was Big Sur, via San Francisco International Airport.

She spent five glorious days blissfully unreachable in the remote part of the northern California coastline. On her drive down, she stopped at the lookout point and took photos of the gorgeous contrast of the cliffs against the blue waters of the pacific. She saw the Bixby Bridge and stared in amazement.

She spent an afternoon into the evening at Nepenthe, a beautiful restaurant perched on the cliffs. Meaning to stop in for one drink and to snap a few photos, she ended up joining a game of bags and genuinely enjoying the company of her new, albeit temporary friends.

By the time she’d made it back up Route 1 through Monterey and Carmel to San Francisco, she was relaxed but ready for some human interaction.

There was no better friend to provide that than the most extroverted guy she knew, Drogo. He opened up his row house to her and happily brought her around the city. Her first stop, of course, was the Full House house. She saw the Golden Gate, the Bay Bridge, Lower Haight, Pier 39 and all of the sea lions, and at Drogo’s insistence she saw the Lucasfilm campus and the Yoda statue.

Much of their sight seeing was just the two of them, thanks to Drogo’s flexible work schedule. But she did have a chance to meet his girlfriend Marie and some of his friends from the area. Marie could not have been better suited for Drogo if she tried. She was considerate, trusting, self sufficient, but almost she was as big a goofball as Drogo.

The night before Dany left, he told her he was going to ask Marie to marry him. “I know we’re only 26, but Dany, she is it for me.”

Never one to show emotion, Dany couldn’t help the tears from pooling in her eyes, “I’m so happy for you. You guys are going to be so happy together.” She meant it too.

When she landed at Logan the next evening, she saw the announcement on Facebook that their engagement was official.

_____________________________________

 

Getting back into the swing of things for her final semester before her internship began was more difficult than Dany had anticipated.

It didn’t help that Margery had dropped out of the program over the summer and was now working full time as a bartender, keeping late hours.

Not long after she got back, Daario reached out, wanted to get together to hear about how her summer was.

She stalled as long as she could but eventually agreed to meet him for sushi.

“You look good,” he’d said over their seaweed salad, “revitalized.”

“Thank you. I think I really just needed a summer out of the city and away from the stress.”

He asked her then where they stood. She told him she didn’t know. This semester’s course load wasn’t heavy but her internship in the spring was going to demand a lot of her time. He was willing to wait for it.

She knew she should tell him how she really felt, but seeing him there across the table from her, trying in earnest to win her affection, she just couldn’t bring herself to do it yet. Plus, _those dimples._

So she took the coward’s way out. And for the first time in her adult life had a little bit of understanding for the position Jon had been placed in during their….knowing each other. 

He was going to be wrapping his project around the same time she finished her degree. He was open to following her wherever she got a job. “Any place in the country can use a project manager for one of their construction sites,” he’d said.

_____________________________________

Her internship was hard. Harder than anything she’d experienced before. They’d placed her in Development Outreach for refugees of underdeveloped countries. Her main job was to make cold calls soliciting donations from wealthy benefactors, but a tertiary responsibility was to assistant copy edit the company sponsored stories about the horrors some of the children had endured. It was horrific and heartbreaking, and made her grateful for whatever normal semblance of a childhood she had.

On many occasions, she found herself seeking the comfort of Daario, if only to feel the warm embrace of another in an attempt to repress the emotions her line of work elicited.

She was never more grateful when the three and a half months long internship ended. But also more determined than ever to commit to her cause, no matter the emotional toll.

Of one thing she was sure. She couldn’t continue on in New York.

Her resume was sent to several different open positions at companies across the US. Even to one abroad.

To her surprise, Dany received multiple interview requests, but the most tempting offer came from a small start up in Cambridge, MA.

The money was pisspoor and the work sounded awful, but the board was completely uncompensated and the minimal salary was due to the attempt of the organization to put as much profit into serving displaced children.

She’d been as impartial in her decision making process as she possibly could. And she’d decided not to tell Jon. It was better that way.

“I’m moving to Boston.” She’d finally told Daario after sending in her acceptance letter.

“I can move there by December at the latest.” Once an endearing quality, the fervor with which he spoke now grated on her.

Removing his hand from it’s comfortable sport on her knee, she clutched it in her hands. “I appreciate that, but I think this is where we say our goodbyes.”

“After all this?” He’d asked.

“You’ve meant so much to me over these past few years.”

“Dany, I love you. I’m in love with you.” He flashed his dimples; except this time, they didn’t have their intended effect.

“You’ll always hold a very special place in my heart, Daario.”

“But you don’t love me?” He’d somehow fallen to his knees at her feet.

Deciding to follow the path of honesty in both her words and her actions, “I”m sorry. I care for you very much, but I can’t say that I’m in love with you.”

“Your heart has never been mine to take, has it?”

“My heart is not available to be given away, I’m afraid.” She drew a hand across his typically smug features, “it was too broken to be available for auction.” She leaned down and placed a gentle kiss upon him. “I’d give it to you if I could.”

He drew her palm to his lips, exhaling deeply before drawing it, wrist facing him, in for a gentle kiss.

Wordlessly, he stood and walked out the door.

_____________________________________

Well, this didn’t seem right, Dany thought to herself as she trudged down two flights of stairs to her new apartment in Boston.

Finally finding the door marked “B-103” she entered the code provided to her by the craigslist realtor, retrieved the key, and unlocked the door to her new apartment in Boston.

_Except._

This was literally a basement. The floor wasn’t concrete, but it may as well have been. She’d known nothing about Boston realty prices and assumed a studio for $900 downtown was probably a good deal. But standing here now and seeing the room with a mini fridge, microwave, and hot plate, she realized perhaps she should’ve done just a little more research. 

Apparently Boston wasn’t that much more affordable than Manhattan.

The sight of a rodent of some kind scurrying across the floor was the last straw. She gathered her bags and made the two trips back up the stairs until she was facing daylight. Walking as fast as she could away from the creepfrest that was her supposed apartment, Dany found herself in a lush green park in the middle of the city.

What was she supposed to do now?

She could find a hotel to stay in.

Or…

No, that was not a good idea. He probably wouldn’t even answer his phone.

But… _what if?_

Sitting on a bench and trying to collect her thoughts, Dany pulled out her phone.

_Should I?_

_Do it. What have you got to lose?_

Without further hesitation, she pulled up Jon Stark’s contact information and pressed send.

He may not even answer. They hadn’t physically spoken in three years.

Suddenly, “hello?”

He sounded curt and distracted. 

“Jon?” _Silence._ Perhaps he didn’t want to hear from her….but he _had_ answered the phone…”Jon?”

“Ye-yeah, yeah it’s me.” his voiced waived. This was a _terrible_ idea.

“It’s Dany.” _What else should she say?_

“I know.” Well that was a good sign? “I mean, hey, hi. How are you?”

Guess it’s now or never, she thought.

“Well, funny you should ask…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Longest chapter yet, hope it was as good for you as it was for me.
> 
> Truth be told, this wasn't originally in the plans, but after the last chapter this idea came at me and basically wrote itself over the course of my entire Sunday.
> 
> I feel like the narration is a little lazy (big fan of show don't tell) but we had to cover three years, so had to gloss over time somehow.
> 
> In case it's not evident, my drogo is based more on Jason Mamoa (#theACTUALsexiestmanalive)
> 
> I hope you guys like Dany's story, and we're really getting a view into her head and she is _growing_
> 
> We also now know that Dany is an Aries to Jon's Cancer. 
> 
> Hope you enjoy! Can't promise an update before Thursday, so for those of you in the US, Happy Thanksgiving!


	9. I Shall Believe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's song is:
> 
> I Shall Believe by Sheryl Crow
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P5P28IENXCk

The sound of the lock being disengaged echoed through the apartment seconds before the knob turned and the door pushed open. Stepping in, Jon scanned the warm light of the apartment, finding Dany perched on the couch in front of her laptop, a fresh cup of tea on the table in front of her.

Unsure of what to say or how to say it, all he could manage was “hey.”

Drawing her attention to him, Dany’s hand went to the top of the computer screen, hesitating a moment before pushing it closed. “Hey.”

Taking this as an invitation to join her, Jon strode across the room and found a seat on the couch next to her.

“So this morning was pretty fucked up.”

“At least I know where I stand with your family.”

“Don’t do that.”

“Do what?”  
“Brush it off. Brush this off.” He gestured between them.

“I’m not brushing anything off.” Her tone was matter-of-fact, as usual.

Jon drew his head back in frustration, “be mad. Yell at me. You have a right to be.”

“Why would I be mad at you?”

“Jesus Christ, Dany. Will you dispense with the fucking stoicism for ten minutes.”

“So you want me to yell at you because your sister insulted me and you didn’t jump in and defend my honor?”

“I want you to show me some god damn human emotion. I want to know that you feel something.” At some point during this exchange, Jon felt his body begin to tremble in anger. His efforts to control his temper were proving futile.

“What your sister said wasn’t super nice, but none of it was technically a lie. Were I in her shoes, I’d probably feel the same.”

“What is this?”

Jon saw Dany’s head quirk to the side as she asked, “what do you mean?”

“This!” He pointed to her on the couch, then drew his hand between the two of them, “this Dany, what is _this_?”

She opened her mouth to speak but quickly closed it.

“What do you want? Huh? You seem to want the best of both worlds. You’ll act like my girlfriend when it suits you, but shy away when it gets difficult.”

“Jon—“  
“No. I’m not playing this fucking game with you again. I won’t do it. Because of you, I’ve risked my integrity, fucked up relationships with my family, and I’m right fucking here, asking for more. I’m all fucking in. I haven’t said anything because I know it makes you uncomfortable, but I can’t pretend anymore.” 

Jon paused to catch his breath. 

“That party last night was incredible. Being there, with you, made me happy. Seeing you joking with my brother and laughing with Pyp and Sam. Seeing you care, Dany, that’s what I want. If you don’t…” Jon pinched the bridge of his nose, “if you can’t be more serious with me and acknowledge our relationship, then maybe it’s time you resumed your apartment hunt and found a roommate more willing to bend to your terms.”

“So, you want me to leave?”

“Is that seriously what you got from my soliloquy?”

“It’s not technically a solil—“

“Jesus christ, I know. Stop.”

Exchanging the computer in her lap for her tea and strumming her fingers on the mug, Dany wouldn’t meet his eyes.

“Am I imagining this? You’re great when things are fine and ambiguous, but the second I broach the topic of us…”

“What is us?”

“Is that a serious question?” Jon was beyond frustration. “God dammit, Dany. Why are you here? With me? If you were done with this three years ago, why did you call me when you had no where to stay? Am I just convenient for you?”

Dany pinched her bottom lip between her index finger and thumb. 

“I’m sorry.”

“What!” Jon’s anger had programmed his mind to anticipate an aggressive reply; calming and catching his breath, he softened his tone. “ _What? Why_?"

“I don’t know how to do this.” It was the closest he’d hear to exasperation from her.

“Do what, Dany? What are we doing?” 

“If I say it out loud, then it becomes real.” She was rubbing her hands together, distractedly. “if it becomes real…” she let out a deep sigh.

“If it becomes real…” he encouraged.

“If it becomes real, then I’m going to lose you.” Her last words were a whisper.

Jon sat down next to her on the couch, taking the mug from her hands and placing it on the table in front of them.

“You can’t seriously think that after all of this,” he took a deep breath, refusing to let his temper get the best of him, “after all this, after everything that has happened between us….”

Before he could finish, she interrupted, “that’s exactly the point, though. Look at what’s happened with us being, well, _whatever_ it is that we are.” She shrugged, “do you want me to admit that I feel badly about hurting Ygritte? That I know if it weren’t for me you’d probably be engaged right now? If it weren’t for the way I pushed you that first time, none of this would even be an issue? Because all of these are things I know, and I have known.”

“That’s seriously what you think?”

She refused to look at him.

“In case you haven’t noticed, I’m here of my own free will.” He paused, desperate, “no one but me brought me here.”

“But you said it yourself. Look at what being with me has done to you.”

“I’ve fucked up, yes. But the sins I’ve committed are mine; I’ll have to atone for them.” He slid even closer, placed his hand at her jaw and thumbed her cheek as she leaned into him.

“I know I haven’t always treated you the best.” She stopped herself from saying more but met his questioning stare with sad eyes.

“I’m sorry for not stepping in earlier.”

“If we do this,” her voice was unsteady, “if I give in to this, I can’t do it halfway.” Anticipating his pending interruption, she raised her hand to silence him. “You have to promise that you won’t take advantage of this, of me and my trust.”

“Dany, I would never—“

“But you did. You did that to someone you loved; or thought you loved.”

He leaned his elbows forward on this knees, placing his head in his palms. “I did love her, I do love her—in that I want the best for her.”

“Then what were we doing.”

The conversation was going in circles and at this point he was too tired to fight. “Would I still be with her if it weren’t for you? Maybe. I don’t know. I love her, yes, the way you have love for someone no longer in your life but think of fondly.” He straightened his posture and draped an arm over the back of the couch, leaning toward her again. “If the situation was reversed, though. If it was you I was seeing and with her in London?” He exhaled in a whistle, “not even a fucking competition. What I feel for you, Dany, I don’t have the words to describe. I can’t stay away from you even when I try. And I don’t want to try again.”

“I don’t want that either.”

Needing no further incentive, he cleared the space between them and tenderly cupped her face between his palms, touching his forehead to hers before closing his eyes and kissing her gently.

Somewhere along the way, her hands had found his neck. As he pulled back and peeled his lids open, he saw the affirmation he’d long been seeking shining in her eyes.

Taking a chance and deciding to say it once more, “Dany, I lo—“

“I love you, Jon.”

He couldn't contain the grin that sped across his face. “Remember who said it first.” He leaned in for another kiss, but she drew back ever slightly, ceasing his movement.

“You have to be patient with me. And you can’t let me fuck this up.” Her eyes searched his.

Unsure of what to say, he captured her lips and pulled her close, attempting to convey the depth of his devotion.

___________________________________________

They shared his bed that night, as they’d been doing for the better part of the previous eight months but it was somehow different. It was a promise sealed, a love finally consummated. 

It was remarkably easy to shift from the ambiguous relationship they’d shared to something more serious, more _finite._

Dany came to his company’s summer kickoff part as his girlfriend. She met his coworkers and charmed them with ease. Knowing of his one office tryst with a female coworker, Eloise, when the woman and she ended up in a conversation, Dany was the epitome of cool and polite; somehow becoming friendly with woman. Somehow making his life at work just _slightly_ easier.

He really wanted her to attend his family’s end of the summer lobster bake on Labor Day weekend, to prove that there was more to they relationship than youthful errors in judgement. But she’d already committed to attend Drogo’s wedding.

It didn’t take much discussion for Jon to believe Dany was going to support her friend. Especially after she told him that Drogo was one of the people that talked her into facing her feelings for Jon.

Though he’d always been weary of the guy in school, and terrified of him in London, the eight foot tall man had never once even so much as leant a predatory glance Jon’s way. And it would’ve been justified, especially after he came to visit them in London and Dany admitted her semi-boyfriend had known of the relationship she and Jon had, even before he got on the plane.

It took a significant amount of cajoling, but Jon convinced Dany to forgo her usual Thanksgiving plans with Missy and come to his family’s house; despite the fact that this was the first holiday Missy and Grey were spending back on the east coast.

_____________________________________________________

“Ok, I’ve gotten a bottle of our favorite red and my favorite bubbles.” Dany was rambling as she packed the re-usable grocery bags. “We have the bacon wrapped chicken, which just needs to be heated up. The cranberry bread and the garlic dip you said your sister loves.”

She was so disheveled and distracted, he couldn’t help but push her against the counter playfully to kiss her.

‘We don’t have time for distractions, did you get the bourbon and make sure there’s plenty of seltzer in the car?”

Nuzzling his nose against her cheek, he couldn’t help but tease her. “You’re irresistible when you’re nervous.”

Attempting to swat him away, she chided, “I think you’d be hard pressed to tell me a time when I’m actually _resistible._ ”

“You’re probably right,” he smiled into her neck as he nibbled and picked her up onto the counter, hands tracing lines up and down her stocking clad legs.

Appeasing him a few kisses, she pushed him away, smiling. “You realize that you had a chance at this three hours ago.”

Barely leaning back, Jon smiled at her. “Yes, but I wanted to save my cardio for our run.”

“And now?” she challenged.

“Now, I’m realizing I’m in better shape than I anticipated.” he leaned forward at bit her bottom lip, eliciting a low and quiet moan.

Pushing him away, she said finally, “we can’t do this now. I need to make a good impression on your family.” After a beat, “or try at a good second impression, that is.”

He kissed her briefly one more time before pulling back and biting at the air just in front of her nose as she made a grab for each of his wandering hands, bringing them up beside the two of them. “You’re lucky I love you,” she said before giving him one more brief kiss and slipping off the counter to grab the full bags from the floor.

Despite her blatant rejection of his advances, he couldn’t help the smile on his face. Had someone told him just five months ago that Daenerys Targareyn would freely admit her love, jump off his counter, and order he take her to his family Thanksgiving, he’d never have believed them. But that was exactly what was happening.

Both his mother and father had assured him Dany was welcome. Robb was home for the holiday and had brought his girlfriend Talisa, whom the family had been hearing about for his entire time abroad, but was only just now meeting. _The more the merrier,_ they’d said.

Thanksgiving was spent at the Cape house, a property purchased while Robb was in high school and Jon in his last year of junior high. Right around when Stark Family Office Services, LLC. had landed multiple wealthy clients and allowed their father not only to expand his office but also to take a step back and let his trusted employees handle the highest stresses.

On a normal day in November, the trip from Somerville to Chatham would’ve taken two hours at most. But this being Thanksgiving, the roads were packed. Almost three hours after their departure, there they sat in Jon’s beat-up Explorer.

“You sure you’re ready for this?”

As Dany prepared to answer, a pair of fists began drumming on her window, “brother Stark and Dany, get out here and join the party!”

Dany looked at him and laughed before puling the handle and getting out of the car.

“Well look who finally decided to show up.” Robb teased.

“Hitting the breakfast drinks a little hard, were we?” Dany bit back.

“Only because my favorite brother and his girlfriend weren’t here to slow me down.” Robb’s cheeriness was infectious and Jon couldn’t help the excitement that washed over him. Thanksgiving had always been his favorite holiday. There were no hidden agendas on this day, no seeking presents or church obligations. Just family together for the sake of being together. And, of course, eating.

“Hi, I’m Talisa,” Robb’s foreign beauty extended her hand to Dany. “It’s nice to know I won’t be the only non-Stark here.”

Jon couldn’t help but notice the adoration which shone from his brother’s eyes at this woman. “This is Dany, my girlfriend and partner in crime.” He pulled her to him, to her chagrin, and kissed her temple. “I’m Jon. It’s great to finally meet the woman who’s inspired my brother to extend his time in London.” Jon reached his hand and pulled Talisa in for a friendly hug.

“Jesus, Robbie, you didn’t lie. Pictures don’t do your likeness justice.” Talisa reprimanded, pulling back from Jon.

Dany smiled at Talisa, “well at least we’ll survive this together, right?”

“Robb, care to give me a hand?” Jon asked, leaning his head toward the hatch of his car.

“Let me just grab this,” Dany snuck in between them and grabbed the bag packed with the wine, prosecco, and appetizers, “you guys can handle the rest.” She winked at Jon and somehow made her way confidently inside with Talisa.

“So,” Robb raised an eyebrow as he spoke, “seems like things are going well with Dany.” His brother pulled a can of light beer seemly out of nowhere and handed it to Jon. Happily opening it and cheers-ing his brother, Jon took a sip.

“It’s so good.” He paused, “too good, almost. It’s like waiting for the other shoe to drop.” A long sip, “but then I remember what it’s taken to get here and it feels like delayed gratification at its finest.”

As Robb and Jon polished off their drinks and moved the groceries inside, Jon saw Dany at the edge of the kitchen apologetic and quiet.

“Hey.” he said, dropping the bags from his arms, “is everything ok?”

In that moment Talisa walked out with a cup of wine and handed it to Dany, clinking glasses with her. “The more for us then, right?”

Curious, Jon titled his head and questioned Dany with a furrowed brow, “huh?”  
Taking a deep sip from her cup, Dany met his gaze, “maybe you could’ve told me that your mother and sisters had an intolerance for the sulfates in the wine I brought?”

“To be fair, I’m not allergic, I just hate wine.” Arya said, walking over with a can of seltzer in her hand and was immediately pulled into a deep embrace by Jon.

“At twenty years old you should be taking any booze you get without question.” Jon winked. “What’s this? A soda water? C’mon, you can’t let us old guys have all the fun.”

“What’s this about old guys?” Ned wrapped an arm around each of his sons, “good to see you boys together again. Perhaps a good family Thanksgiving will convince you to move back home.” He said to Robb while elbowing Jon.

“Well, I do actually have some news.”

“Out with it, then.”

“Was hoping to wait until everyone was around.”

“Ahh, this is a big one then?” Jon joked.

“Ahem!” Ned called to the kitchen through the open concept living room. “Ladies, Robb has something to tell us.”

Ceasing their conversation and moving to join them, Sansa, Catelyn, and Talisa made their way over, interested.

“Well, no pressure dad.” Receiving a shrug from his father, Robb continued, “No point in beating around the bush, I guess. I’m moving home in January.”

Everyone cheered and Catelyn lunged for her first born, placing motherly kisses on his face, “oh finally!”

The commotion dying now slightly, Jon couldn’t help himself, “there’s more, isn’t there?”

Catching his brother’s eye, Robb smiled and made his way to Talisa, slipping an arm around her waist, “Talisa is coming with me.” He paused for dramatic effect and the room remained silent. “As my fiancé!”

This time it was Sansa who jumped into his arms in excitement while Ned pulled Talisa into a sweet embrace and Catelyn stood motionless, happy tears slipping down her cheeks.

Jon was ecstatic, his brother had been away for too long and this woman was perfect for him. Getting lost in the happy mood, he suddenly realized Dany was standing behind the group.

Nodding his head for her to join them, she took a spot next to him. “Congratulations, Robb. I am really happy for you.” She took a sip of her drink, “it’ll also be fun to see what trouble you Stark boys get into together in the same city.”

“Oh don’t worry,” Talisa smiled, “you and I will just have to get into some trouble of our own.”

Interrupting their conversation, Sansa asked, “where do you think you’ll be moving?”

“Oh, probably north of the city, Somerville or Cambridge I think. We want to stay on the redline.”

“What about Southie? That’s on the redline.”

Jon rolled his eyes, “Southie is perfect when you’ve just graduated college and want to feel like you’re still on a college campus.”

“Oh, did I ask you?”

“Watch out Jon, she bites.” Arya quipped.

“As I was saying,” Sansa paused to see if another interruption was coming. “As I was saying, rent is cheaper in Southie, and we’ve got the redline.”

Robb chuckled, “that IS true. But, you have to take a bus to get to the train station and I’m not dealing with that nightmare parking.”

“It’s not that bad.” Sansa huffed and took a sip from her cup.

“Wherever we end up, it won’t be far, I promise you that.”

“If you need a place to stay when you first get back, your old room is empty and can be yours for a small fee.”

“Depending on how the search goes, we may take you up on that.”

Sansa excused herself, apparently having lost interest in the conversation.

“As long as it’s alright with the boss, of course.” Robb nodded to Dany.

“It’s fine with me. Just be careful, I needed a temporary place to stay when I moved here and now I’m stuck with this one.” She raised her glass in Jon’s direction.

Talisa giggled and put an arm around Dany’s shoulder, “oh we’re going to get on famously.” Dany raised her glass to meet Talisa’s and threw a quick but genuine smile Jon’s way.

_Fuck_ , things were good, Jon thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, they've had _the talk_
> 
> Things seem too good to be true. They live happily ever after now, right? ;)
> 
> As always, thank you so much for all of your thoughtful comments! I'm enjoying engaging with all of you!


	10. Sleep on the Floor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's song: Sleep on the Floor, The Lumineers 
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v4pi1LxuDHc

The call came just after midnight.

At first, Dany was confused and annoyed, it was late on a Tuesday, who could possibly be calling at this hour. Being a light sleeper, she had to shake Jon awake.

“Jon, your phone was just ringing.”

Groaning and slowly waking, he looked at her. “Can it wait until morning?”

“I can’t say for sure, but in the years we’ve known each other, I’ve never heard your phone ring at this hour. It’s your call.”

‘Ughhhh,” seeing Jon roll over and search for his pants Dany laid her head down and attempted to welcome slumber back. At this hour, no doubt it was Arya or Robb, or god knows who else, having had too much to drink and needing a ride. As much as she liked Jon’s siblings, she had to work early and would much prefer the story Jon would come home with in the morning, preferably with fresh coffee and bagels.

Easily dosing, Dany’s half slumber was disturbed by the loud thunk of something hitting the ground and the reverberating of what could only be Jon slamming against a wall.

Her body moving before her mind understood what was happening, Dany slipped on an oversized t-shirt and found Jon on the floor in the living room, knees to his chest and head bowed.

“Jon…” She sat beside him and touched a tender hand to his chin.

After a moment or two of silence, he turned to look at her, his face wet with tears. “My father…”

Needing no more to understand his meaning, Dany reached fiercely for his shoulders; using her right hand to pull him into an embrace while her left reassuringly rubbed at his neck.

“He was just…how can I…what do I…who plans these things? How…how do you know what to…”

Jon was unable to form a coherent statement.

Her heart breaking for what Jon was going through, was about to go through, she did the only thing she could in that moment and pulled his head to her chest, allowing him cry quietly as she carefully massaged his back and arm, placing gentle kisses into his hair.

After some time Jon jerked his body upright, almost jumping from the floor to his feet and began pacing nervously and rubbing his right hand back and forth through his hair. Within not much time, he was at the sink, sponge in hand, washing the pans from the dinner they’d made that evening. He began aggressively scrubbing at the dish the macaroni casserole had been baked in.

“Jon.” Her voice was as light and tender as she could manage as Dany joined him and placed her hand on top of his, ceasing his movement. 

“We probably won’t be home for a few days. If we don’t get this clean now, it’s going to be ruined.”

“Then I’ll buy another. It’s ok.” The pan and sponge fell to the sink.

“My favorite sweatshirt is dirty.”

“I’ll wash it tomorrow for you.”

“I have a client appointment in the morning that I can’t miss. Oh shit, I need to call my boss.” He’d passed her and sat on the couch, hitting the power button on his laptop. “This was going to be a busy week. Shit! I have that interview on Thursday! They won’t reschedule and they’ll just go with the other candidate.”

“Jon.”

“After all of this prep work I put into the presentation for tomorrow and finally being considered for a promotion and…I don’t have time for this.”

“Jon, take a breath and look at me.” The anguish on his face when he turned to her broke her heart. 

“Dany, I need to—“

“—you need to sit back for a minute and let your mind to process this. None of these things are urgent.”

Jon’s phone began buzzing in it’s discarded spot on the floor. He dashed to grab it, “hello?”

Dany could only hear Jon’s side of the conversation.“Yes, mum called me…at the hospital now…have you talked to…ok…do you need a ride?” Jon made eye contact with her, “she has to work early today, but…”

She shook her head and wrapped her arms around him, whispering a quiet “no.” If he thought she was going into the office this morning, he was crazy.

“Ok, we’ll grab her on the way. I’ll call her when we’re outside…within the hour?…Ok…you too.”

Hanging up the phone and looking down at Dany, Jon sighed. “Robb’s going to drive out to Worcester to grab Arya, we’re going to pick up Sansa in Southie on our way down.”

“Ok. Should we pack bags?”

“Not going all the way to the cape today. Mum told Robb to just go home and she’ll tell the realtor not to show it this week.”

“Ok. You should still have a bag though. Do you want me to pack it for you?”

“Fuck. I don’t have a key to the new locks.” Jon dragged his palms along his face.

“Does Sansa?”

“I don’t know!”

Dany knew his frustration was not directed at her.

“What can I do to help you right now?”

Jon’s body practically fell back onto the couch. His index fingers made a triangle at the tip of his nose and his thumbs pinched his lips; his gaze focused on the wall ahead of him. “I don’t know.” His voice was empty, absent. “I don’t know what I’m supposed to do or how I’m supposed to feel. How do you react? I don’t want to know. I just want to go to sleep. I want to go to out with Robb and Talisa, just like we have been. I want things to be normal and average, and…”

Dany sat on the couch as close to him as she could, wrapping her arm around his shoulders and kissing his shoulder then his temple. “I know…I know…I’m so sorry.”

“I feel like I can’t sit still for five minutes and also the only thing I want to do is sit on the couch.”

“I suggest we keep moving. I’ll drive us to your parents’ house. I’m going to warm up the car, we’ll stop for coffee on the way.”

Dany didn’t know how to explain to him that this was the easy part. Soon he was going to be surrounded by family and friends and more food than he could imagine. The days and weeks following today were going to be horrible, but also incredible. She didn’t know how to tell him that the most awful thing he’d ever experienced in his life would be immediately followed by the biggest showing of love he’d ever felt.

Dany somehow managed to get Jon up and convince him to dress as she hastily put together a bag of clothes and snacks.

By the time Dany had quickly packed the car, Jon was making his way out of their apartment and heading for the driver’s door.

“Jon. I’ll drive.”

“No, I can. I know how to get to Sansa’s.”

“Jon. It’s not a question. I’m driving. Sansa’s on east eighth and Broadway. You can direct me when we’re close.” 

Jon texted Sansa as they turned onto her block. Dany pretended not to notice the look of disappointment when the girl realized it wasn’t _just_ her brother in the car. 

“Sansa, there’s a cup of hazelnut coffee back there for you.” Dany tried to meet the younger girl’s gaze in the rearview. “If you want it. If not, just leave it there and I’ll throw it away.”

Sansa’s bloodshot eyes refused to meet Dany’s gaze, but she did take the cup from the holder and sip at it.

“I don’t want to go in.” Sansa’s comment wasn’t addressed to either Dany or Jon, it was a statement to herself, to the air.

Suddenly regretting how close to the city Jon’s parents house was, Dany tried to give Sansa a polite and sympathetic reply, “I can stay outside in the car with you, as long as you need.”

“I don’t want _you_.” She bit, “I want my father.”

Dany decided the best way to show comfort was to remain silent.

Her eyes drifted briefly from the road ahead to Jon’s melancholy body, staring blankly out the window. 

Their car was the first to reach the house; big and dark and empty as it was. They unloaded the few items they had and sat in the living room awkwardly, thanks to Sansa’s knowledge of the location of the spare key.

“I don’t know if this is appropriate, but I threw our bottle of vodka in the bag.” Dany needed to break the silence, needed to take the edge off.

Sansa’s head turned to her abruptly, “God yes. Please.” 

As Dany was haphazardly making drinks, the front door swung open and revealed Robb, Talisa, and Arya—Arya who ran straight to Jon and embraced him tightly.

“Tell me it’s not real. Tell me.” She sobbed into her brother’s shoulders.

The only reply Jon managed was to pull his sister close and join in her tears.

Dany hesitated on returning to the family, the last thing she wanted was to interrupt their sorrow. It was only when Talisa entered the kitchen seeking a glass of water that Dany was forced to join everyone else; tray of drinks in hand.

The drinks had actually, somehow, dulled everyone’s sorrow. As they all sat in anticipation of Catelyn’s return, each Stark sibling drank their share and told a memorable story of the great Ned Stark.

Her attention fading in and out, Dany didn’t catch every tale that was told, but her heart was captured when Jon, the quietest of the family, leaned forward while swirling the drink in his glass absentmindedly and recalled a time in his youth when he was experiencing difficulty mastering his triangles in Geometry class.

In an effort to assist, Ned had asked Jon what an acute angle was. Unknowingly, Jon had read the definition from his textbook, still not understanding.

“No, Jon.” Ned had said, pinching his index finger and thumb, “it’s a _cute_ little angle.”

At the time, Jon rolled his eyes at his father and held back a chuckle, but the memory was clearly one he recalled fondly and frequently.

By six in the morning, Catelyn had finally made her way home and the Stark siblings had enjoyed enough alcohol to lull them into weary sleep. All deciding that they needed a respite from the sorrow that had overtaken them, everyone sought the comforts of their childhood bedrooms, attempting in vain to get some rest.

Unsure of how to help and unable to sleep, Dany set about cleaning the mess of the night before and organizing the clutter that came with seven people. Once that task was was complete she found a pen and paper and made a list of necessities. With the house having recently been staged and put on the market, the cabinets and fridge were barren.

Mentally ticking down the things they’d needed when her own father had passed, Dany didn’t notice another person enter the room until she heard a throat clear.

‘Oh my gosh, Catelyn.” The normally well kempt older woman appeared disheveled in the doorway of her kitchen.

“Is there coffee?”

“None that’s warm. We brought a bunch on our way, but it’s cooled by now. I can heat it for you? I was about to run out to grab some things, I can get you a fresh coffee?”

“Don’t trouble yourself, whatever’s in the house is fine.”

“It’s no problem at all. Let me get you this for now.” Dany motioned toward the box of coffee on the counter, opening it and pouring it’s contents into a paper cup. “Do you take cream or sugar? I’m sorry, we didn’t think to get milk or soy…”

“Black is fine, thank you.”

Dany handed her the coffee as Catelyn pulled out a chair and sat at the table and extended her hand in invitation for Dany to join.

“Ned didn’t want to sell the house. This was where our children grew up, this was home, he said.” She took a sip, “they did their homework at this table.”

“Those kinds of decisions don’t need to be made right now.”

Catelyn let out a sound that was half hiccup half sigh as she looked down and closed her eyes, elbows propped on the surface in front of her and paper cup just inches from her face.

“ _Those_ decisions don’t need to be made now, but so many others do.”

“I can help you in any way you need.”

“This your idea of helping?” Catelyn nodded to the near empty bottle of vodka on the table.

_Fuck._

“I’m sorry. I probably shouldn’t have, but when my dad died we stayed up talking and had a few drinks and…I’m sorry.” This was probably the last thing this woman wanted to deal with right now.

“I didn’t know you’d lost your father.”

_There’s a lot you don’t know._

“It was a long time ago.”

“This is going to be so hard on Sansa.”

Dany was unsure of how to respond.

“Of course, Ned loved and was close with all of the kids, but she was always the odd one out growing up.” Catelyn sipped her coffee. “Arya was always chasing after Robb and Jon, never had any interest in tea parties or dress up or dolls. With all the time alone, Sansa found a love for reading.” A sad smile crossed her lips, “something she shared with her father. When she was old enough, Ned would bring home the classics and _god_ how Sansa would _consume_ them. The two of them would talk for hours about Oscar Wilde, F. Scott Fitzgerald, Nathaniel Hawthorne, Aldous Huxley, and so many others.” 

Catelyn paused to meet Dany’s eyes, “she really is a sweet girl with a warm heart.”

Dany felt a new sort of kinship toward Sansa. Though the circumstances of their respective rearings were vastly different, she knew what it felt like to have the only person in your family who understood you ripped away suddenly. As she was debating whether or not to offer this long guarded information to her boyfriend’s mother, the opportunity was lost.

“It’s a shame the only other person she’d really feel comfortable talking with right now….” The older woman trailed off, the silence saying more than any words she could’ve uttered.

 _Always have to throw some kind of jab at me, huh?_ Dany thought, irritated. She’d dropped everything to be here in the middle of the night.

As if sensing her thoughts, Catelyn continued, “I don’t mean to offend you, Daenerys. You just need to understand, from the moment Jon introduced Ygritte to us, she fit like a puzzle piece we didn’t know was missing. For Sansa it was like finding the sister she’d been waiting for her whole life.”

 _Oh, that makes me feel better, thanks._ Dany fought the urge to roll her eyes.

“People comfort each other in times like this, I think maybe it’s a automatic instinct that’s part of the grieving process.”

“Hey,” came Jon’s voice from the doorway. Dany was grateful for the interruption. As he padded into the room barefoot and in his clothes from the night before, Dany reached for the empty coffee cups.

“Do you want some coffee? I was actually just about to run out and get some things; anything you need?”

Standing behind his mother and giving a reassuring squeeze to her shoulder, “maybe some fresh coffee and, I don’t know bagels or something? Food that we can pick at.”

Biting her tongue on the fact that the house was about to be full of more food than they could ever eat, delivered by loved ones unsure of how to properly share their condolences, Dany shook her head, “of course.”

Leaving mother and son to themselves, Dany found her bag in Jon’s room and quickly brushed her teeth, splashed some water on her face, and ran a brush through her hair before pulling it back. Deciding this was good enough, she slipped her sweatshirt over her head and grabbed her jacket.

When she reached the bottom of the stairs and had removed almost all of the contents of her purse, she realized Jon had the keys to the car. Torn between not wanting to interrupt but needing to run errands, she decided to err on the side of caffeine and provisions and turned to the kitchen, where it sounded like more voices had joined.

“The funeral home can see us at 10.”

“What do we do until then?”

“Make calls, I guess, let people know.”

“We should start with the out of town relatives.”

“Is there anymore coffee?”

“Dany went to get some. And bagels.”

“Ugh. Why does she have to be here.”

“Because, Sansa, she’s my _girlfriend_.”

“Since what? Like five minutes ago? And for how long? Until you find another girl to sleep around with?”

“Sansa! I’ll not hear any more of this, not today.”

“Mum, it should just be family. I don’t want…”

“Oh, so you want Talisa to go too, now, is that it?”

“No, Robb, god. Of course not.”

“Hang on, how is _that_ any different?”

“Because they’re _engaged_ , she will be _family._ ”

“Why’re you hiding out here?” Dany hadn’t sensed anyone come up behind her and nearly jumped at Arya’s unexpected and _loud_ question.

Without waiting for an answer, the youngest Stark sauntered into the kitchen leaving Dany no choice but to follow.

“I didn’t mean to interrupt, I just needed the keys from Jon.” Her arm jolted in his direction quickly, awkwardly.

“Dany, I—“

“No, no it’s fine. Tensions are high right now.” She paused, “I just, uh, the keys?”

“I must’ve put them in the bowl by the door, sorry force of habit.”

“No worries at all.” She waived and was grateful the keys were, in fact, exactly where Jon said they’d be.

Shutting the door behind her and making careful steps over the light layer of ice on the brick walkway, Dany zipped her jacket higher, silently cursing New England weather. March shouldn’t supposed to be _this_ cold.

Deciding that the car needed a few minutes to warm up, based solely on the fact that the leather seats were freezing, Dany pulled out her phone and opened up Facebook; an unwelcome thought thunking around in her head.

“I don’t even know if she’d read a message I sent to her.” She said aloud to her own reflection in the rearview. “And, hearing from me is probably the last thing she wants. Am I borrowing from Peter to pay Paul?”

A gnawing feeling ate at her stomach.

“Ok, fine. If she doesn’t have me blocked I’ll do it.”

Typing the name into the search, the first result was the one she was looking for. There it was, the victim of her past transgression staring her right in the face. And she had the option to _Add Friend, Message, or Block._

She looks so happy…

It was _four_ years ago that she found out…

Before losing her nerve, Dany typed a quick message letting her know that Ned had passed away and that she knew how close she and Sansa were. She didn’t know if it was her place to say anything and was sorry to impose or bother. 

Dany quickly hit send and tossed her phone into her bag on the seat beside her. The car now sufficiently warmed up, she put it in drive and was on her way, pleased when her favorite song of the moment, Some Nights by that new band Fun. came on the radio.

When she pulled up to the house an hour or so later, she decided to check her phone, just to see.

She had one new Facebook message.

From Ygritte Snow.

“Thank you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, that was unexpected, eh?
> 
> I guess we could technically consider this the beginning of "Part II" of the story.
> 
> I'm sorry for the delay in getting this chapter out, there's a little bit of personal experience going into this one which made it harder to break through, and also for that reason I chose to explore it from the Dany POV.
> 
> Keep in mind, with first person narration, we are getting mildly _biased_ details.
> 
> I had originally wanted this chapter to be named after the song "Carry On" by fun. (Off the album Dany listens to in the car), but after listening to the song, it felt just a little too up beat. For those not keeping track, that means this chapter takes place in March of 2012.
> 
> As always, but can never be expressed enough, thank you so much for reading and for your wonderful comments. It means the world to me. I will really try and get something up sooner!


	11. Explosions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's song is Explosions by the Mary Onettes
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gTrZCrb4I_4

“Ugh, no, that’s shit!” Jon highlighted the last three paragraphs he’d typed and hit delete. He never would’ve expected to have such a difficult time with Western Civ., yet here he was, struggling to get through the first page of his first paper of his Sophomore year.

For not the first time since he embarked on this attempt to tackle this assignment he thought about texting Dany, just to see how she was doing with it. But, as it had in the first few times he’d conjured the thought, his better judgement objected and overruled his impulse.

Deciding that perhaps he should’ve gotten that book the professor suggested at the beginning of the semester and more than ready for a distraction, Jon threw on a sweatshirt and grabbed his wallet and keys. The fresh air would do him well anyway.

As he made his way across campus and saw the lights of the bookstore, he realized they closed at nine and it was ten of. He’d be quick and gracious to the lone employee working on a Saturday night.

The bell dinged above his head at his entrance and, just as he suspected the store was completely empty and the lights had already been dimmed.

“We don’t sell red bull here, and in case you’re one of those people, we definitely don’t sell booze.”

It was that cute redhead he’d seen in here a few weeks ago, her back was turned to him as she was organizing some books on a shelf.

“People actually think the school bookstore would sell booze?”

Her head turned over her shoulder, meeting his gaze as she licked her lips and bit back a smile. “Honestly, no. But one of these times I’m hoping someone will, just to give me some other form of entertainment on Saturdays.”

She was clever.

“Well, I didn’t come looking for a red bull either.”

She moved to face him fully, “ok. I’ll bite. What are you looking for?”

“The Essence of Truth by Martin Heidegger.”

“Spending your Saturday night with Plato?”

“And hopefully Heidegger.” Jon gave her a shy smile.

“Touché.”

“Do you still have it?”

“The store manager did keep a couple copies of the books he thought would be popular later in the semester. Let me take a look in the back.”

She must’ve known her way around that backroom like a pro because she emerged less than a minute after she retreated, book in hand.

“Looks like you’re going to have your philosothreesome tonight after all.” 

“Clever.” He raised his eyebrows at her, “Thanks so much, sorry to keep you.” He handed her his debit card.

“No worries.” She drummed her hands on the side of the register until the drawer finally shot open with a ding and the receipt noisily printed out.

“Bag?”

“Nah, I can manage carrying it.”

As he took the book from her and strode to the door, he realized he didn’t want their encounter to end. Stopping at the door and placing a light hand on the handle, debating whether or not to just continue his trek back to his dorm.

“I can’t close up if there’s still a customer in the store.”

Unsure of what to say, he opened his mouth and let the words flow out, “how’d you know the book was about Plato?”

“Jeez, you really do wanna spend your Saturday night with old philosophers.”

“Sorry, I shouldn’t have…I’ll let you go.” He pushed the door open.

“Hold up.” He met her gaze, “I’m on my way anyway, if you want to buy me a hot cocoa?”

“You want to spend your Saturday night with old philosophers?”

“But you’re missing the _point!_ ” Twenty five minutes later and they were sitting at the steps of her dorm.

“No, no, I get it!”

“Explain it to me then.” She challenged, sarcastically.

“It’s just like in The Matrix.” He put down his cup so he could speak with his hands. “These guys spent their whole life thinking the shadows reflected on the wall was reality, when the one dude escapes and sees the truth and comes back to tell them all and free them, they refuse to accept that they’ve only been seeing reflections, refuse to accept that there’s more than what they can see. Instead of try to understand, they kill the threat.”

“The dude who escaped?”

“Yes!”

“Ok but,”

He put his arm on her hand, interrupting her, “sorry. But you see thats exactly how it’s like the matrix, all the humans think the matrix is real but it’s just a shadow on the wall.”

“And this is your argument for your paper?”

“I mean, part of it.” He felt defensive. “That’s why I came to the bookstore tonight. I need to flesh out the other part.”

“May I speak now?”

“Yes, sorry.” He reached down to take a sip of his cup.

“So, I think your argument has potential, but,” she held up her index finger, stopping his interruption. “It’s too obvious. You need to tie it back to reality, to the lives we’re living today.”

“Ok, and how would you propose I do this?”

“What’s the point of the allegory?”

“That some people won’t believe the truth, even if it’s right in front of their face.”

“Ok, solid answer.” She raised her hands and pushed down at the air, he assumed to assuage any offense, “but it’s not just _some_ people, it’s everyone, all of us.”

“How do you mean?” he furrowed his brow.

“The argument is that it’s a natural human tendency to ignore what’s in front of them if it doesn’t fit with their previously formed concept of reality.” 

When he didn’t say anything, she continued.

“For example, do you believe in ghosts?”

“No.”

“So if someone showed you a video of a ghost in their house, what would you say?”

“That’s not fair though, that can so easily be faked.”

“Case in point.” She shrugged.

“No no no, that’s not fair, you can’t use that kind of an example.”

“In Plato’s time they thought the earth was the center of the universe. If given evidence to indicate otherwise, people would’ve—and did—claim this was fake evidence.”

“Jesus, are you a philosophy student?”

“Nah, I just took an AP History class last year. My senior paper was on the forms.”

“You’re a freshman?”

“Guilty.”

“Well you schooled this sophomore.”

“Does this sophomore have a name?”

How had they spent almost an hour together without him realizing he didn’t know her name? “I must’ve misplaced my manners,” he extended his hand “Jon Stark.”

Capturing his hand with a firm grip, “Ygritte Snow. Thank you for the hot cocoa, Jon Stark.”

He asked for her number and called her the standard two days later asking her to dinner. She accepted. It was that simple.

Jon had never been popular in school. He got along fine, for sure. But in High School he wasn’t exactly the type that girls swooned over. HIs brother Robb, though? Reliable with the ladies.

Getting to know Ygritte was the easiest thing he’d ever experienced. She was beautiful and smart and had a quick tongue. She grew up in Vermont and teased him when he complained about the snow. Though she was pleasantly surprised when she learned he and his family were skiers. “I ran lifts at Stowe on the weekends the last few winters,” she’d said “they don’t normally like high school kids to do it, but my uncle Tormund has worked for the mountain for years, so they made an exception”

The fall semester flew by and before they knew it, winter break was upon them.

He found himself hating the thought of not seeing her for almost a month.

“You could come by our place at Killington after Christmas.” He found himself suggesting the morning they were to depart for their respective homes for the holidays that she visit for New Years and meet his family.

He was so nervous that first time, introducing her to everyone. But she wasn’t. She walked in and owned the room; immediately noticing the Shakespeare book on the table and striking up a conversation with Sansa about the idea of a rational faculty being trapped in a corporeal body. She started referring to something called the Great Chain of Being and relating it back to Hamlet and the scene in the graveyard, but Jon had lost interest at that point. Luckily, his father was able to jump in and offer his own insight and pull some relation to Dr. Faustus.

She kicked his ass on the mountain. She skied like she was born for it. Challenging him to double blacks and stopping every so often to tease him for his pace. He was confident that if it wasn’t for his slowing her down, she’d basically have gone straight down the mountain.

She was fearless.

“I grew up on the slopes.” She’d said when the paused at the lodge for lunch and incidentally bumped into Arya.

Arya who, as it turned out, had the same desire for adrenaline as Ygritte. Arya who stole his girlfriend and ski partner for the afternoon in search of steeper trails, while Jon was banished to the harder blues by his lonesome. Though he couldn’t say he minded.

It all seemed too good. A girl he liked and his family not only liked but easily accepted made his heart soar. If only Robb was here for it this year.

By the mid-afternoon, Jon was sitting in the lodge again this time with his parents and Sansa. His father had graciously looked away when he ordered a beer and the waiter didn’t card him. Ygritte and Arya made their way in, completely windswept and giggling.

“This one has no fear, which is saying a lot coming from me!” She hooked her thumb over her shoulder and stood beside Jon.

“Can we order you something?” His mother, always concerned, asked.

Waiving her hand away dismissively and grabbing for a large sip of Jon’s drink, she smiled. “I’m good. Just needed to warm up before the last runs of the day.”

“You’re going back out there?” Sansa was shocked.

“The powder’s great, not too much ice today thanks to the warmth. I want to make the most of it.” After a beat, “as a kid, I lived on the mountains the way you kids lived on the ocean.” She ended with a wink.

“But the worst that happens in a sailboat at dusk is you capsize and have to right the boat.” Sansa argued.

“Wouldn’t know much about capsizing, but I can tell you plenty of stories about my falls and yard-saling on the mountains.”

“Clever.” Jon side eyed her.

“Clever girls need more runs before the day is over.” She pulled at Jon’s hands, erecting him from the stool he sat comfortable aloft. “One more run?” She pouted, but not too much. 

Reluctantly reaching for his jacket and helmet, “fine, but you’re unclipping my boots when we get back.’

“Jon, not in front of your parents!” She jested.

Ignoring her, and the amused smiles from his parents, he agreed to to take the life up one last time and ski down _conclusion_ with her.

As they reached the end of the lift line, the sky was a water color mix of light pinks, purples, and blues. Gathering his barings and pausing before his descent.

“How long have you been afraid of heights?”

“What?” He looked back at her, poles dug firmly into the ice.

“You’re terrified right now.”

“I wouldn’t say I’m _terrified_.” 

“Fearing your own mortality then, Jon Stark? That work?” 

Taking a deep breath and closing his eyes in an attempt to calm himself, “you really—“

“—I know, I really do.” 

“You don’t know what I was going to say.”

“So, say it then.”

“You really are annoying sometimes.”

“Only sometimes?” She wiggled her eyebrows and leaned in for a kiss, but their helmets touched before their lips could. She pulled her head back and lunged forward at him again, clinking their helmets harder this time.

Jon’s hand grasped a tangle of hair that had come free of her helmet. “Most of the time you’re annoying.” He tilted his head so he could kiss her lips, “sometimes you’re really annoying.” He kissed her again and leaned his helmet against hers and took a chance, “but all of the time, I love you.”

“You realize you’ve already bedded me, many times. And we can’t very well do anything about it here.” She gestured to the landscape.

Her shoulders relaxed and she bit her lip, “fine. I guess I love you too.” Her pupils faced the sky, but when she finished her thought she met his stare innocently and fluttered her eyelashes.

It was as easy as that.

Second semester was more challenging. Ygritte had officially declared her major as poli-sci and was trying to get as many difficult classes under her belt early.

They saw each other enough, but each wished for more.

A friend of Jon’s was throwing an Ides of March party right before spring break and it was right up Ygritte’s alley. He was ecstatic when she said yes and was easily willing to prepare their costumes.

Not the biggest student of history, he hadn’t realized that an Ides of March party was a glorified Toga party. But such was life. And that was how they ended up at Grey’s door, each wrapped in their own consecutive sheet and not much else underneath.

Jon was quite relieved to walk in and see the majority of the individuals at the party matched his aesthetic.

“Jon Stark!” The words rang in his ears. A voice he’d tried so hard to avoid and forget.

“Danerys Targaryen, fancy meeting you here.”

“It’s great to see you!” She attempted to yell over the noise of the party.

A tall figure approached and handed a cup in her direction “they didn’t have cranberry, so I did what I could.”

Dany took the cup appreciatively, “Drogo, I don’t believe you’ve met Jon.”

The taller man immediately turned and raised his glass, “hey man! Nice to meet you.”

“Cheers.” Jon half heartedly returned the gesture.

What did Dany see in such a bro, anyway?

At the exact moment she was needed, Ygritte returned with two full solo cups. “No one was watching the keg, so I took a chance.” She handed one to Jon.

“Hi, I’m Ygritte.”

The briefest of smiles flashed across Dany’s face before she turned her attention to Ygritte. “Dany,” they casually shook, “nice to meet you.”

An awkward silence overtook their small crowd.

“DROGO!’” someone yelled.

“My turn at beruit,” Drogo stated obviously, “Stark, feeling like being my partner?”

Without a word Jon and Drogo joined forces and were seemingly unstoppable. Jon found himself actually enjoying the man’s company.

After three rounds and no more challengers, they each begged for their respective girlfriends.

Sitting on the couch next to each other, the girls bonded over their love of The West Wing. That would keep Ygritte talking all night; that show was the cause of her initial interest in politics. Neither the biggest fan of the game, both girls reluctantly stood for the game. 

“I’m not drinking this disgusting beer.” Dany announced as she stood at the end of the table, ball in hand.

“Then you’re gonna have to aim well, doll-face.” Drogo teased.

“Is there any beer you wouldn't consider disgusting?”

Dany answered Jon’s question by sticking her tongue out at him.

“Very lady-like.”

The girls held their own in the game far better than anyone would’ve expected, but in the end were bested by Jon and Drogo.

They ended the game laughing with each other while Jon tried to work out if he liked their new friendship.

Their next challengers finally beat them and Jon went looking for the keg, and Ygritte. He found the former more easily that the latter. When he did stumble upon hist girlfriend, she was standing in a corner, with Daenerys of course.

“What havoc are they two of you reaping?”

“Daenerys is thinking about studying abroad in London next year, too. Did you know that?” There was excitement in Ygritte’s voice.

“Really?” Was all he could manage as he saved himself with a sip of beer.

“Ygritte tells me you’re considering it as well?”

“It’s all but a certainty, actually. My best friend from home is going and we thought it’d be fun to split a flat while we’re there.”

“Well it looks like I’ll have a friend, then.”

“If you decide to do it.” Jon corrected.

“Why wouldn’t she do it? Everyone I’ve talked to says it’s the best experience.”

“I just meant—“

“Do you not want me there, Jon Stark?” Jon choked on his sip. “Don’t worry, it’s a big city, I’m sure we won’t step on each other’s toes too much.” Dany winked.

“Is Drogo also thinking of going?” He couldn’t help the question.

“And be away for any part of his senior year? You kidding?”

“He’s a senior?” Ygritte questioned. “Guess we both like older men then, huh?” Her elbow nudged Dany in the ribs. “Ok. I’ve gotta pee. Haven’t broken the seal yet and now I’m dying.” As she left, she turned and joked “pretend you like each other.”

They stood in awkward silence for a moment, neither knowing how to continue the conversation with the other.

“Guess you’re not great at pretending.”

“No.” He said it before realizing it’s meaning. “No, I mean, I do like you.”

She gave him a bemused look and sipped her drink. “You’re uncomfortable.”

“What?” He was taken aback.

“I get it,” she shrugged, “you don’t want your girlfriend to know how we met. It’s fine.”

He was unsure of how to respond. She was mostly correct.

“She’s a catch, that one. Wouldn’t want to do anything to screw that up.” She waived her hand at someone behind him. Someone he assumed was Drogo. “If you’ll excuse me.”

He stepped out of her way. “Nice catching up with you, Jon Stark.”

Three days later, Pyp sent him a text telling him to check his email. It was a link to a very reasonably priced flat in London. The only catch being it was a three bedroom.

“Know anyone else coming abroad at the same time as us?”

The idea struck Jon immediately and he was both intrigued and hesitant. He wrote back, “I think I do, actually.”

Guess London isn’t so big after all, he thought as he opened a text to Dany.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're back in college! ....for now...
> 
> Sorry on the delay, the busy time of year is stealing my writing time.
> 
> I've also spent some time on the outline for this beast and i think we'll be coming in at approx. 20 chapters.
> 
> I've been toying with the idea of writing some scenes that happen offscreen and putting those into their own fic; would people like that? They'd be shorter in length and wouldn't need to be read, but would just compliment the story being told here.
> 
> Thank you again for reading and for your wonderful and thoughtful comments!


	12. Just Like Heaven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's song is Just Like Heaven by the Cure:
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Dhn_iIQXDE

“Thanks for coming today.”

“Of course!”

“You’ve been such a help through all of this; I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

Dany rotated her reclined head to face Talisa, her back arching slightly against the massaging pedicure chair. “Trust me when I tell you, being here with you today is far better than being in the office.”

“I don’t just mean today, though. I don’t know how I would’ve gotten through the last year of wedding planning without your help.”

“Or without my vodka.” Dany chuckled.

“Oh my god don’t even joke about that. I’d never have survived.”

“You sure Robb isn’t taking advantage of this solitary moment to take a peek at the dress?”

“He’s sworn on our wedding night that he wouldn’t.”

At Dany’s arched brow, Talisa let out a soft chuckle, “he sees the dress before the wedding and he doesn’t see me out of it on our wedding night.”

“You know, I’ve heard a lot of people don’t end up….” Dany searched for the word, “consummating their wedding the night of, thanks to open bars.”

“What are we millennials doing to the wedding industry?” 

Dany gave a polite laugh and turned her attention back to the magazine in her lap.

“Did I offend you?”

“What? No.” Dany shook her head.

“Do you think you and Jon will get engaged soon?”

Dany opened her mouth, but no words came. Her honest thought was that she had no idea. She’d known Jon for the better part of eight years and that was a question she couldn’t answer.

“I’m sorry, did I intrude?”

“No, not at all.” Dany smiled at her friend. “We haven’t discussed it.”

“Really? After how long?”

“This weekend isn’t about me and Jon, it’s about you and Robb.”

“I don’t mean to pry.” 

Dany could see the anxiety in Talisa’s eyes. “You’re not, don’t worry.”

“Is Jon nervous about his speech?”

“He says he’s not,” Dany shrugged, “and he’s usually great at public speaking, but with this I can see right through him. I know he’ll do great, I think he just doesn’t want to disappoint”

“Has he practiced it for you?”

“Just the highlights. I told him not to go up with a word-for-word rendition of what he intends to say written on note cards. It’d be too stiff.”

“I’m sure whatever he says will be great.”

“He’s got some funny material, just needs to deliver it properly.”

Tailsa reached across the arms of their respective chairs to touch Dany’s elbow. “You know I’d have you in my party if I could, right?”

“Please,” Dany rolled her eyes, “you think I have to be in your wedding party to know I’m a good friend?”

“I just…”

“You think I’m going to feel left out because you’ve got Arya and Sansa as your bridesmaids?”

Talisa smirked and cast her eyes down, “you see a lot more than you let on.”

“There’s no use in getting upset over something not meant to upset you.”

“Sansa’s jealous of our friendship, you know.”

“Sansa wishes I didn’t exist.”

“That’s a bit harsh, isn’t it?”

“I don’t blame her. Because of me she lost a very good friend.”

“Can I be honest for a second?”

Chuckling, Dany replied, “have you not ben so far?”

Tailsa feigned an irritated glance before continuing, “I don’t understand what was so fucking grand about Ygritte.”

Dany couldn’t help the laugh the heaved through her and wrought a stern look from her pedicurist.

“No, I’m serious. The way it’s told by the Starks, this girl was the fucking second coming of Christ. Like, come on. I’m so tired of hearing about that anytime…well, anytime it’s brought up.”

“Has Robb said this?”

“Well, no. But he’s explained the…situation. He’s on our side.”

“Our side?”

“Whatever side you’re on, I’m on it too.”

“I appreciate your loyalty to me, I do.”

“I just—“

“I’m never going to live up to the perfect Ygritte the Starks love.”

“But she couldn’t have been…”

“That’s not the point though.” Dany drew her iced coffee to her mouth, biting briefly on the straw before sipping. “Jon and I are the bad guys in this story.” Dany raised her hand and shook her head at Talisa’s would-be objection. “Whatever they say, Jon and I did,” Dany drew in a long breath before letting out a deep sigh, “we snuck around.” Her head tilted slightly to the side, “for years.

“Not just once or twice or even a dozen times. We went behind people’s backs and, no, of course neither of us wanted to hurt anyone. But we did. And we both knew what we were doing. We knew it was wrong. But, we just couldn’t…We couldn’t…”

“Stay away?”

“We couldn’t stay away.”

“That still doesn’t mean you should be treated the way you are.”

“No,” Dany acknowledged, her voice flat, “but it doesn’t mean I expect to be welcomed with open arms. I knew Ygritte, I liked Ygritte. She was—is—a nice, sweet, caring girl.”

“Did you know her well?”

“I mean, well enough. I’d say she was a tertiary friend.”

“Did it upset you to see her with Jon?”

“I wanted to cut the bitch.” Dany let out an ironic laugh, “but she wasn’t a bitch and she had no idea what was going on around her. How can I blame her for that?”

“So you think it’s fair then? Sansa’s distrust of you?”

“Fair? No. Do I get it on some level? Yes.”

“Do you think Ygritte knows that you and Jon are together?”

Dany had wondered this on a few occasions herself. The girl had to suspect something was up after she’d texted her with the news of Ned Stark’s passing.

“I honestly don’t know. She deleted us both on Facebook and had me blocked for a while.”

“Does she live around here?”

“Last I knew, which was back when I was living in New York, she was in the D.C. area.”

“Is your throat feeling any better?” 

“Way to change the subject,” Dany jested.

“Just because you aren't in the wedding doesn’t mean I don’t want you at 100%.”

“My throat has been fine for a day or so, lest you worry.”

“So you will be drinking at the wedding then?”

“I mean, it’ll be the last day of my antibiotics, what harm could it be?”

“Are they still considering taking your tonsils?”

“Only if I get strep once more in the next few months. So let’s hope no. If they take away some of my parts, I’ll no longer be considered a collector’s item.”

The wedding was Saturday at the Chatham Bars Inn and the whole family was going down early Friday. Dany and Talisa had conveniently forgotten to tell everyone else that they’d both taken Thursday off to get their nails done and wrap up any last minute items.

Talisa had been a godsend since arriving with Robb the previous winter. Neither of them realizing how difficult it was to find a semi-reasonably priced non-shithole (as Robb and referred to it), they spent the first month and a half of their time in Boston taking advantage of Jon’s offer to crash in the spare bedroom.

In that time, Dany learned a lot more about the Stark family. Chiefly, that Jon and his brother were far more alike than Jon had ever let on and but also that she and Talisa had far more in common than they’d already realized. Neither woman preferred to leave the house without their hair or makeup done and both loved to spend hours in Sephora; pouring over eyeshadows and bronzer and highlighter and, who could forget, lipsticks.

Dany was high maintenance when it came to these things and would openly admit it. She wouldn’t be caught dead in anything drab and plain from The Gap and, as it turned out, neither would Talisa.

Talisa had become Dany’s unexpected ally exactly when she needed a friend in the Stark family that wasn’t her boyfriend.

By the time the two ladies made their way back to Somerville, it was after four. Talisa having convinced Dany to split a bottle of prosecco over oysters and bruschetta as a late lunch, on Dany of course. The two ladies made their way up the stairs to Jon and Dany’s apartment; a slight buzz from the alcohol sending them easily into fits of giggles.

The scene they walked in on wasn’t all that much different from the one they’d just left. Except that it was completely opposite.

Jon, Robb, and Pyp sat on that white couch everyone hated; several empty beer bottles strewn across the coffee table and two boxes of pizza on the peninsula that divided the kitchen and the living room.

“Princess!” Pyp exclaimed upon seeing Dany, standing to wrap his arms around her. “It’s been too long, your majesty!”

Rolling her eyes and biting back a grin, “there’s a new queen in town as of this weekend.”

“Ah yes! The soon-to-be new Mrs. Stark!” Pyp brushed Dany away dramatically, in favor of Talisa.

“My lady! It’s wonderful to meet you. Happy to serve.” He rolled his left hand as his right fell to his torso, seemingly capturing it as he pretend bowed.

“Jesus, Pyp.” Jon stretched the ‘e,’ “you couldn’t be more annoying if you tried.”

“Just trynna make a good impression on my future sister-in-law.” The man winked at Talisa before making his way back to his vacated spot on the couch.

“Your sister-in-law?” Talisa quirked a brow at him.

“Didn’t ya hear?” Pyp wrapped an arm around Robb and one around Jon, “we’re basically brothers, ya see.”

Eyeing Dany with an amused expression, “if you’re _basically_ my brother-in-law,” Talisa teased, “how is it that we’ve lived in the states since January of this year and I’m only just meeting you two days before my wedding?”

Pyp’s mouth opened in an exaggerated ‘O,’ “your highness, I couldn’t get away until now. Begging your forgiveness.”

“Not me you’ll be answering to, I’m afraid.” Talisa upended her chin to Robb.

“Him?”

“That’s right me,” Robb affirmed, “and you’ll do well to remember.” He banged the almost empty glass in his hand to the table in pretend offense; encouraging a chuckle from the room.

The rest of the night went by quickly, thanks in no uncertain terms to the company that was kept.

As they lay in bed hours later, Robb and Talisa having left to make the most of their last night together as an unwedded couple and Pyp having crashed and burned in the spare bedroom, Jon placed teasing kisses along Dany’s neck from his position behind her as big spoon. 

“You realize I’m technically still contagious?” Dany asked without opening her eyes.

“MmmHmm,” was Jon’s only reply as a hand slid beneath the elastic of her pajamas, “I’ll take my chances.” He ended with a gentle but firm bit at her earlobe and a quick gyration of his hips; eliciting from her a soft moan.

They didn’t get enough sleep that night.

Morning came far too quickly; a rush of last minute packing, a fast breakfast, not enough coffee, and an extremely hungover Pyp.

Thankfully for them all, the traffic from Somerville to the Cape was essentially nonexistent during the first week in October.

Due to the family having paid for early check in, the rooms were ready at 11:30 when they arrived.

“You’re sure you won’t be too bored while we go and set everything up and then head to the rehearsal?” Jon had asked as Dany made herself comfortable on their gigantic bed.

“All I want to do right now is sleep. You go to what you’ve got to.”

“I hate that you’re still sick.” Jon sat beside her, hands gently trailing up and down her torso.

“It’s what happens when the weather goes from sixty degrees to below twenty within a day,” she paused, “at least for those of us not raised in New England.”

“Don’t push yourself. The last thing I need is another week of you whining about your cold.”

“Excuse me!” Day raised her right hand to hear heart. “It’s strep throat.”

“You’re one to correct my hyperbole, it was definitely not twenty degrees the other day.”

“It felt like it.” Dany mumbled under her breath.

Jon rolled his eyes and left her with a feather light kiss on her forehead and a swat at her hip.

Suddenly, Dany’s alarm was going off across the room. Disoriented and not fully realizing she’d been asleep, she stumbled to where the phone was plugged in on the dresser and hit the snooze button. 

She may not have been invited to the actual rehearsal, but Talisa made it abundantly clear that she was more than welcome at the rehearsal dinner. In her eyes, Dany felt she was getting the better end of the bargain. 

The sky was already painted with streaks of black by the time she found herself in the lobby to meet the family.

Robb was the first one to catch her eye, striding over and pulling her into a loose hug.

“You look lovely, as always.” He smiled down at her.

“You clean up pretty well, yourself.”

Catching the end of the conversation, Jon joined them. “Were you complementing Dany’s new dress?”

“It is a very nice dress.”

“It better be, that’s her rent money from September.”

“This _and_ the dress I’m wearing tomorrow, don’t be so dramatic.”

“I thought you didn’t pay rent?” Robb questioned her.

“Of course you don’t pay rent.” Leave it to Sansa to walk in at exactly that moment.

“When I first moved here I was dirt poor from Grad school and Jon refused to let me pay. By the time he started asking, I started refusing.” Dany shrugged, “they’re not gonna want the whole cow if you give away the milk for free.”

“I don’t think that’s what that metaphor’s about.” This time, there was no edge to Sansa’s voice, she was genuinely confused by Dany’s joke.

Intervening, Jon said, “apparently you cannot wear the same dress to a formal event more than once within a certain timeframe. Laws which apparently don’t apply to guys.”

“Well you can’t be photographed in the same dress at two weddings in the same year.” It was clear by the tone in her voice that this did seem like the most obvious thing in the world to Sansa.

“That’s stupid. If I didn’t have an assigned dress for tomorrow, I’d just wear this one again.” Arya jumped in on the conversation.

Neither Sansa nor Dany could stifle the laugh at what they presumed to be a joke. It wasn’t.

The dinner itself was one of the most extravagant experiences Dany’d ever had; paid for by Talisa’s parents at their insistence, to heck with tradition. The hors d’oeuvres course included every type of edible crustacean and was followed by mashed potatoes, brussels sprouts, mac and cheese, and who could forget the steak?

Dany’s plan was to avoid drinking this night but the waiters were filling the wine glasses as if it was water. She was fairly certain no one’s glass was ever less than half full.

Though she hadn’t ever doubted it, this dinner had affirmed to her that Talisa’s family had as much if not more money than Jon’s.

Dinner wrapped at ten and Dany could not have been more grateful. The wine had only helped to enhance her fatigue. Excited at the concept of having an entire king sized bed to herself for the night, she was surprised at the tug of his hand leading to the bar.

“The kids are going to the bar, the parents are going to bed.” He cocked his head over his shoulder to the left. 

“I don’t have it in me.”

Jon gave a slight nod and pressed his lips together in understanding. “You want me to come back to the room with you and tuck you in for the night?” She could see in his face and hear in his voice that he wanted to continue drinking with his siblings.

“No, no.” She waived him away, “your brother only gets married once. You should celebrate.”

“You sure?”

“Definitely, have fun.” 

“I won’t stay up late.” He gently assured.

_Yes you will_ , she debating saying back.

A throat clearing behind them interrupted their parting.

“Jon, a quick word?” Came his mother’s stern voice.

While Dany was almost positive that Catelyn didn’t hate her, she wasn’t completely convinced that the woman didn’t not hate her. Her position with two of the four Starks who hadn’t seen her naked was somewhat precarious. She was also certain that Catelyn was upset about the fact that she and Jon were sharing a room.

At least on Saturday.

Friday night the brothers were bunking up; Robb insisting on maintaining tradition and not see his bride until she was headed for him at the altar.

Though she and Jon grew up in vastly different family situations in vastly different states, the one thing their childhoods had in common was their deeply catholic roots.

Catelyn could control where they slept, which she’d gone to painstaking effort to enforce, even when they were staying for those few days after Ned had passed; but she had no control here. Jon had insisted on paying for his own room and, though Dany suspected, she couldn’t say for sure that his exact motive was so they could share a bed.

Unsurprisingly, just past one in the morning, Jon stumbled in with little grace; evidently forgetting the previously agreed upon sleeping arrangements.

“Did I wake you?” He whisper-screamed as she sat up in bed. “Sorry, that chair came out of nowhere.”

Through the dark she could see the outline of his figure as the left his clothes in a trail behind him.

Once in bed, his advances were quick and sloppy.

Under normal circumstances, she’d be more than happy to fool around in the middle of the night. Though she questioned to herself when one A.M. had become the middle of the night. She pretended not to notice his intentions and snuggled into her pillow.

It wasn’t that she was annoyed with him for staying out late or for being drunk. 

She was annoyed because not less than twenty five minutes after she’d retired to her room, Sansa put up a photo with Robb, Jon, Arya, and Talisa on Instagram and captioned it “the new and improved Stark siblings.”

Thankfully, due to the alcohol he’d consumed, Jon’s efforts were easily dissuaded and it wasn’t long before he’d fallen asleep.

Jon and the guys were supposed to meet for an eight o’clock tee time the following morning, but when Dany tried to rouse him at seven, he simply moaned and rolled over for a few minutes…before getting up and stumbling to the bathroom to retch.

Robb and Pyp came knocking when Jon, almost always an early riser, wasn’t in the lobby waiting for them with a coffee in hand. 

“He’s in the shower,” she stepped back, pulling the door with her as invitation to enter.

She earned a chuckle from Robb.

“He can’t drink the way he used to; no doubt you to thank for that.”

Dany met him with feigned skepticism. “That, _or_ the fact that he’s often pulling sixty hour work weeks these days and doesn’t want to waste a weekend feeling like shit.”

“Her highness is always gonna defend the boy.” Pyp brushed past them and drummed on the bathroom door with his knuckles. “Jon-O! Give yourself one more good puke and put on your big girl panties and let’s get this party started!”

“Five minutes!” Was Jon’s cranky reply as the shower abruptly stopped.

“You do realize you’re making me wait on my wedding day, don’t you dear brother?”

Robb was answered with a swift swing of the bathroom door opening, revealing a very disheveled Jon; water droplets still cascading on his skin and a towel drawn quickly around his waist.

“Cut the bullshit, everybody knows it’s Talisa’s day.” He brushed past them, further into the room. His body faced away from them all as he quickly dressed, paying no mind to the company.

“You’ve been working out, my boy.” Pyp whistled.

“I do hope you men appreciate the fact that you can go do whatever you like for the next six hours while the women have to get their hair and makeup done.”

“ _Have_ to, princess?”

“Please. Spare me your manninist bullshit. We all know if women took the same amount of time to get ready for the wedding as men, you’d all have something to say.”

“I’ve missed that fire inside of you.” Pyp pulled her into a friendly hug.

“Alright, let’s go.” Jon was behind her, placing a hand gently on the small of her back and giving her a quick one-two pat before slipping past.

“Jesus, _you_ look like shit.”

“Not all of us were born with your muted good looks, Pyp.”

Just like that, Dany was standing face to face with only one Stark brother.

“Don’t worry. He’ll have no more than a single Bloody Mary on the golf course this morning.”

Dany rolled her eyes and shook her head. “Be good, have fun.”

Although Dany wasn’t officially in the bridal party, Talisa had invited her to stop by the bridal suite for mimosas and gossip.

Deciding not to intrude too much, she went for a run on the treadmill in the hotel gym, showered, and finally made her way to them with still damp hair and a bottle of prosecco at eleven.

When she entered, Sansa was the first person she saw. The redhead was holding up a picture of the hairstyle she wanted in one hand and gesturing at her scalp with the other.

Not immediately being noticed due to the commotion, Dany cleared her throat and held up the bottle in one hand, “happy wedding day!”

“Dany, thank the maker! Neither of these two will have a drink with me.” Arya greeted from her chair against the window; makeup being applied.

“I’m too nervous to eat, let alone drink!”

Dany occupied the empty cushion beside Talisa, taking a moment to appreciate the view of the water. “A little alcohol will cool your nerves enough to eat something.” At this, Talisa drew her hands up in surrender.

Needing no further incentive, Dany uncoiled the foil and removed the metal, popping the cork with the precision of a one who’d opened many a bottle in her life.

“Are any of your friends coming to hang out? Want to make sure everyone gets a taste.” Dany asked, shaking the bottle quickly in her right hand. She knew Talisa had several friends from home that’d flow in for the wedding but whom were not included in the bridal party because she “wouldn’t know who to include and who not to, and Robb is only asking Jon and Pyp.”

“No, I’m sure they’re either still asleep or just getting up and getting their acts together from the time difference.”

“I remember that feeling well.” Dany quipped, topping off the four glasses. “The time change had me off kilter for a week after I got home from London.” She caught Sansa’s side-eye as she turned to offer the flutes, passive aggressively offering one to the younger redhead and pulling it just far enough away when she reached for it. She gave a quick wink and placed it in her hand.

Dany knew it was a petty act and she also knew that Sansa knew exactly what she was doing. She wasn’t here for this shit. _Not today._

She raised her glass, “to Talisa and Robb!”

Not wanting to intrude too much or overstay her welcome, Dany helped the women finish the contents of the bottle; not a difficult feat between the four of them. As she was excusing herself, the mothers of the bride and group were entering. She’d met Talisa’s mother, a kind and beautiful woman, for the first time the evening before.

“I bumped into Cat on my way over here to help you into your dress and she wanted to steal a peak at you before the wedding.”

Dany greeted both women with brief hug and wished everyone good luck. As delicate as her relationship with her boyfriend’s mother was, she did empathize with the older woman today. It couldn’t be easy for her to experience this without Ned. Jon had recently confessed that as happy as he was for his brother, he did feel a little bittersweet about it himself; it being barely more than six months since his passing.

Feeling slightly lightheaded from the bubbles, Dany got herself excited at the concept of making a room coffee; an act she always enjoyed in hotel rooms and something for which Jon mercilessly teased her.

Swiping the key in the lock and pushing the door open, she was greeted with the sight of her boyfriend in just his tuxedo pants, leaning to the mirror over the dresser, gelling his hair.

“Is the patient feeling better?”

Keeping his attention on his hands massaging through his scalp in his own reflection, “a little hair of the dog and some fresh air helped quite a bit.”

Standing behind him and wrapping her arms around his naked torso, she felt him shudder as her hands touched his stomach which elicited a giggle from her. 

“Your hands are _cold!_ ”

She placed a kiss on his shoulders, earning a quick squeeze of her head from him.

“Gotta say, you do clean up nice.”

He met her eyes in the mirror and opened his mouth to speak before pausing a moment, seemingly reconsidering and replying with a simple, “thanks.”

“What were you really gonna say?”

“I was gonna make a wise crack about getting lucky with a bridesmaid, then I realized they’re my sisters.”

Smirking at him and stepping away to open the package of coffee, “hey, if that’s what you’re into…” He deadpanned her in reply.

“You know, for all the shit I’m given about my hair, you do spend an awful lot of time on yours.”

One last brush against his hairline, he wiped his hands on the towel he’d placed on the dresser and reached for his tuxedo shirt, hung from the the curtain rod and winked at her.

“Today’s the day you finally get to wear the dress you’re obsessed with, I can’t believe you haven’t put it on yet.”

Jon had chastised her quite a bit for the garment she was planning to wear on this day. His eyes all but fell out of their sockets when she told him that one hundred fifty was the sale price. Thankfully, it had gone from a tense discussion on her spending habits to a bit of a joke between them.

She wouldn’t tell him, but part of the reason she bought two new dresses for this occasion was due to the fact that she’d be meeting a lot of his family for the first time today and she was in no way unsure that many knew the terms under which they’d met. And yeah, she did have a taste for the finer things in life.

The dress itself was beautiful though, cobalt blue lace over a right pink bottom layer and a scalloped bottom. Not normally the biggest Lily Pulitzer fan, the dress was a shift from their normal a-line shifts.

He didn’t ask and she didn’t tell him that the Kate Spade heels she was wearing cost her almost three hundred dollars.

“I’m about to, don’t worry.”

Back at the mirror tying his bowtie, she heard a light chuckle from him. “I’m sure you’re going to look equally as good in it as you do out of it.”

“Which would you prefer?”

“For me, out of it. For the wedding, in it.” She’d begun brushing her hair as he snapped on his suspenders and slid them up to his shoulders.

“When are you guys leaving?”

“Our limo is getting here at one, not sure about the girls.”

“You better hurry then,” the clock read 12:45.

He completed his look with the jacket, straightening the lapels before turning and holding out his hands “ta-da! What cha think?”

She dropped her brush on the bed and arched up to peck his lips. “Looks good, but I think I’d prefer you out of it.”

He gave her a quick swat on the behind before grabbing his wallet, phone, and can of beer she hadn’t noticed until he reached for it. “See you at the church.”

The ceremony was at three but they were taking the separated photos before and the combined after. There were also shuttle busses to and from the church and hotel (where the reception was behind held), but it was a temperate day and less than a half mile walk. Dany joined other like-minded guests and bared the trek, carrying her shoes and wear flip flops which she intended to slip into her back before entering the church.

Both the bride and groom having come from deeply catholic families, of course the ceremony included a full mass. The lapsed catholic she was, Dany was tempted to skip communion, but felt it may appear disrespectful and also realizing that it may win her points with the terse Stark relatives, she made her way to accept the body of christ and knelt in the pew, giving a genuine prayer for happiness for Robb and Talisa.

Watching them standing up at the altar, Dany could see the appeal of Robb Stark and understood the popularity with women that Jon had described. The resemblance between the two Stark brothers really was uncanny at times. But as she caught a wink in her direction, she decided she’d somehow snagged the better looking brother.

Talisa looked remarkable in her puffy-skirted ballgown style dress. Though the woman would probably look like perfection wearing a burlap sack. Standing next to her, Arya and Sansa also looked beautiful in their a-line lilac lace dresses and Dany told them as much in the receiving line on the way out of the church.

She was able to steal a moment of Jon’s time before they were off for additional photos and she was headed to the cocktail hour. “You’re wearing your hair up, you never wear your hair up.”

Dany had braided her silver tresses to one side and wrapped the tail into an intricate and loose bun low on the left side of her head. It was one of her first forays into an up-do and she was rather pleased with the results.

Facing him, she grabbed for his hands and gently pulled on them, leaning her chin on his chest.

“You look beautiful, perfect really.” He grazed his lips against her cheek.

She leaned up and whispered in his ear, “you’re the hot brother,” pulling back and staring at him lovingly.

It being a cape wedding in the fall, the signature cocktail was a cranberry lime vodka martini, aptly titled “The Cape Codder-tini.”

By the time guests were ushered into the banquet hall for the formal introductions, Dany had already made her way through two.

The bride and groom had opted for a sweetheart table over a head table, leaving a spot for Dany next to Jon.

After the parents, Pyp and Sansa walked in, Pyp clearly having whispered something wildly inappropriate and Sansa in a fit of giggles as they made their way across the dance floor. Jon and Arya followed, Jon jogging in with his little sister on his back, doing a quick spin in the middle of the dance floor—almost losing his balance.

The french doors leading to the room were closed for a minute before they introduced the new Mr. and Mrs. Stark. They strode into the room eloquently and confidently, pausing in the middle as Jon had, Robb holding Talisa’s hand up as she spun before pulling her to him and pushing her into a graceful dip.

Though she hadn’t discussed it, Dany secretly concluded that this one action was why the bride had opted for a ballgown.

The blue afternoon sky quickly transformed through a neon sunset into evening through the wall of windows overlooking the ocean below. Speeches came and went, first dances were had, and cake was cut.

The mix of soft jazz, Bobby Darin, and Sinatra gave way to contemporary dance music and Dany traded her heels for the more comfortable flip flops she’d walked in earlier. Before she knew it, Dany was screaming along to _Call Me Maybe_ , a vodka soda in one hand, the other flailing in the air above her as she moved to the beat.

When the lights came on and the DJ announced there would be pizza served in the bar, Dany realized how much fun she’d had laughing and dancing with not just Jon, but all of the Stark siblings, _even Sansa_. The younger girl and she having wrapped their arms around each other shoulders and swaying as they sung along to Billy Joel’s _Scenes from an Italian Restaurant._

When Jon plunked a vodka soda in front of her at the bar, she realized just how much she’d imbibed and requested he order her a water as well and inhaled two slices of pizza, willing the bread to soak up the over consumed alcohol in her system. She was leaning her elbows on the edge of a high top table, Jon beside her sipping on some bourbon drink and gently rubbing her lower back. Across the table from them were Arya and a couple of the younger male Stark cousins whose names Dany had failed to remember.

Dany’s memory was a little fuzzy, but she vaguely remembered the conversation ending and finding herself alone at the table with Jon. He pulled her to him at the waste, his voice soft as he said, “I hope you’re not too tired. I’ve got things in mind for you.”

“I mean if we leave now…”

Deducing her implication, Jon took her hand and lead the way. “We’ll just have to Irish goodbye it.”

On her way out she noticed two things; the first being the look on Catelyn’s face as they slipped by her. The older woman knew exactly why her son and his girlfriend were sneaking out. The second being the lack of distance between Sansa and Pyp, who were standing in the back corner of the bar. Dany made a mental note on that one.

“I think you’re going to need to wear one of these more often,” Dany was attacking his neck from behind him. Biting at it and his earlobes while her hands worked deftly at unbuttoning his shirt and he fumbled with getting the door open.

Once through the threshold, Dany found herself slammed against the wall and pressed closely against Jon, just enough room behind her for Jon’s hand to slid the zipper down her back, her hands raking through his now messy hair. He sucked sloppily at her neck as his hands trailed up the back of her thighs, pulling her right leg to wrap around him and palm at her bottom.

He pushed his hips into hers, clearly in need of friction. Taking the hint, Dany undid his buckle and tuxedo pants and slid a hand in to grab at him. He let out a loud hiss at the contact, breaking his lips’ contact with her skin.

As her hand began to move, he bit at her ear. “Oh, you are _in for it_ tonight.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When i'm writing each chapter i think of the things i want to say in the notes but by the time i get to writing the note, i have completely forgotten what i had planned.
> 
> Along with Dany meeting the Starks for the first time, this is a chapter i've been _dying_ to write. I really really hope you guys liked it.
> 
> I also realized in writing this that i know an insane amount about weddings (i've been in 7 myself).
> 
> The Lily dress i described for Dany is actually real and it's beautiful: https://i.ebayimg.com/images/g/YFwAAOxydlFSrmI3/s-l640.jpg 
> 
> I know a lot of you were expecting a little drama in this chapter due to Dany's texting of Ygritte. I'm sorry to disappoint you, but we're not going to see Ned's funeral in this fic. I'm fairly certain i will be doing the separate / complimentary fic of short moments in their lives, so if i feel masochistic enough, i may write that down the line. It seems like some readers are interested in the additional chapters separately, which is good. 
> 
> The separate chapters would be scenes that either don't have an exact place in the timeline or outline of this fic, or things that i think i want to see from the characters down the line.
> 
> In case it's not obvious, the "present" of the story is always moving forward, while the "past" jumps around a bit.
> 
> It was great to see so many of you tell me you wanted more than 20 chapters for this, it's so exciting seeing your amazing reactions to this! I'm sorry i haven't been interacting with you through the past few chapters, it's a busy time of year and getting this out is already taking a lot of my spare time. but please know i DO SINCERELY appreciate the comments, kudos, and book marks.
> 
> In a completely selfish vein, this has officially surpassed the longest fic i've ever written, which i think is awesome alongside the fact that it the last chapter brought this to over 10k views.
> 
> sorry for so much rambling and so little proper grammar. 
> 
> TLDR: you guys rock!


	13. Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's song: Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)
> 
> After much internal debate, I chose the U2 version https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mmZBC92pgrE, solely because that's the first version of this song I ever knew.

The discussion about where they’d be spending Christmas began just after Halloween.

Jon was slouched on the couch, a damp facecloth at his forehead, nursing a hangover. Dany was in the kitchen making him dry toast and scrambled eggs for herself.

“Maybe next time, don’t try to shotgun beers with twenty one year old college students?” She called to him across the room.

His initial reply was a loud moan. “Can you make the room stop spinning?”

The clink of the plate hitting the table cause him to uncover his eyes, meeting her hand to capture the glass of coconut water she’d poured.

“Don’t you dare try and force me to eat that banana.”

“You need to hydrate and you need potassium. Dry toast will only do so much.”

He chanced a small sip, “it was funneling.”

“What?” she asked as she plated her eggs.

“We didn’t shotgun beers, we funneled them.”

“Cause that makes such a difference.”

“Could you not eat those in here? The smell from there is already doing things to my stomach.”

“Next time listen to me when I tell you to eat and drink water all day before a party.” She stood on the other side of the peninsula in the kitchen, plate in on hand and fork in the other.

“How are you _not_ hungover?”

“Perhaps because the moment we got to the party, my boyfriend started funneling beer and doing jello shots.”

“Ugh, I forgot about the jello shots.”

The truth was that while she and Jon had always enjoyed going out for a few drinks, their heavy drinking days were definitely behind them and after how drunk she found herself at Robb’s wedding, she’d decided to really take some time off of booze.

She almost cracked the week before, but the one sip of the prosecco she ordered just didn’t taste right.

Last night she decided that if the mood struck her, she’d have a few drinks. But she found herself nursing the same glass of wine the entire night. 

And even after that one glass, her stomach was still slightly off. Though she’d never let on to Jon.

At leas their costume was a hit at Sansa’s party. 

When Jon asked her two weeks before if she’d wanted to go to Sansa’s party, her initial reaction was, of course, to play it off like she didn’t really like halloween.

Then Jon showed her the text.

_“My roommates and I are throwing a party in our house. Arya’s driving out from school with a few friends. Robb and Talisa might come. You should swing by.”_ Then the next bubble, _“Dany’s welcome too.”_

The tension between Dany and Sansa had never been explicitly addressed, but Jon knew to try and keep them apart, for peace’s sake.

Decided to take what she could get, Dany agreed to attend the party. As long as they could go in a couple’s costume.

Jon agreed, on the condition that he picked the couple. Intrigued and half convinced he’d drop the ball, Dany accepted his terms.

That’s how she ended up in boots, dark pants, a white shirt, and a black vest with a blaster at her side; Jon in a Chewbacca costume.

“I’m not wearing a wig.”

“Han Solo does not have long blonde hair.”

When she countered with, “Chewbacca isn’t 5’9,” he let the argument drop.

Though Sansa wasn’t overly welcoming to her, she was courteous and greeted her with a stiff hug.

_Progress._

“I want you to come to Killington for Christmas this year.” He’d said it after tossing two ibuprofen in his mouth and sucking back the rest of the contents of his glass. She could tell he was trying to sound nonchalant, but she knew he was anxious to ask her.

“Missy’s family will be expecting me though.”

“They’ll understand if you tell them you’re coming to Christmas with me and my family.”

“Jon…”

He dropped it, for that day.

When he brought it up a few days later, she told him she didn’t ski.

The next time broached the topic, she told him she didn’t think she could get that much time off at the end of the year. He argued that it was really only four days when you take into consideration the holidays.

Each time he asked, he wore her down a little more. And he definitely knew it.

The last time he asked, the week before thanksgiving, she was dropping him off at the airport for a work trip. He leaned over to kiss her goodbye and gently brushed her cheek with his thumb. “Think about it, ok?” Leaving her no time to respond, he pressed his lips to her forehead and was out the door. 

“Have a safe flight.” Was her only reply. She was too tired to argue about it anymore.

She’d been so tired lately in general. The days were getting shorter and she was tempted to go to bed with the sun most nights.

On her way home she called Missy.

“Keep in mind, if you go, you’ll be trapped in a condo with them for seven entire days.”

“Eight, they go up on the 23rd.” Dany corrected.

“I’m sorry, but no one in their right might can ski for eight days straight.”

“They do like snow shoeing and cheesy shit like that.”

“Oh, so you’re going to go for a nice little snow shoe trek with your bestie, Sansa?”

“He really wants me to go, Miss.”

“Two years ago, would you have imagined we’d be having this conversation?”

“The whole concept of never say never really does make more sense as you get older.”

“I think you want me to tell you not to go. You want an excuse to say no.”

“You’re right.”

When she go to work that morning she sent him a text. 

“If I’m spending eight days with your family at Christmas, I’m spending Thanksgiving with Missy.”

“Deal!” was his reply, with a smilie face.

It wasn’t until she was looking at the calendar for the month of December that she realized her last depo shot was at the end of August. It was strange to not get the typical automated reminder call from her doctor’s office.

“Family medicine, this is Diane.”

“Hi Diane, my name is Deanerys Targaryen, I’m a patient of Dr. Mulligan. I am due for a depo shot and was wondering when I could come in?”

The older woman politely asked her to hold while she reviewed the calendar.

“Daenerys?”

“Yes?”

“You can come in Friday, if that works for you; anytime after three we’re available.”

“Ok, let’s say five then?”

“Ok, I’ll make a note. You’ll get a reminder call on Thursday.”

“Great, thank you!”

Dany heard muffled speaking on the other end of the phone. “Oh, and Daenerys?”

“Yes?”

“Since you missed your August shot, we’ll just need you to sign a waiver indicating that you’re reasonably sure you aren’t pregnant.”

As the adrenaline rushed through her, Dany could feel her heart beat in her ears. What was this woman talking about? “I was there in August. I got my shot then.”

She heard papers ruffling on the other end of the phone before, “we have you in for a sick visit on August 28th.”  
“Yes, I came in for a sore throat and they gave me my shot at the same time.”

“That’s not what we’re showing. You were seen by Dr. Collins for a strep test and you asked for a flu shot.”

“No. No. I said I didn't want a flu shot. I never get the flu and I’ve never had the flu shot. That’s exactly what I told the nurse when she asked me.”

“You know, a lot of people don’t think they need vaccinations because they’ve never been sick. But when it comes to vaccines, you need to look at it as a hive. Your body may be immune, but you could still help spread the disease.”

“Jesus Christ, I’m not an anti-vaxxer, I just said no to the fucking flu shot.”

“That’s not what our notes say, ma’m.”

“I was there for my birth control shot, not a flu shot. You’re telling me that I’ve missed a shot.”

“It’s ok, It happens all the time. As long as you haven’t had unprotected sex, we can give you the shot on Friday.”

“That’s the point. I _thought_ I was having protected sex.”

“Your doctor will counsel you on this when you come in, but you really ought to be—“

Dany hung up the phone before Nurse Ratchet could finish her sentence; mentally tallying the number of times she and Jon had been together since August.

No way. There was no way. She would not become a god damn cliche.

_Although…_

She had been tired lately. Really tired. It was like she couldn’t get enough sleep.

But she hadn’t been sick. At all. Sure her stomach had been a little queasy. And the other night at the restaurant she could smell buffalo wings from the other side of the room.

And she had been slightly averse to coffee recently, that was unlike her.

And, she had randomly craved roasted root vegetables every day this past week. But they were in season.

With all the thoughts racing through her mind in that moment, one stood out among many: _FUCK._

Jon flew home on Friday morning and had a bachelor party that night until Sunday then he was traveling out of town Monday through Wednesday, rounding out his open enrollment meetings. She’d gotten used to his busy travel this time of year, having a shadow in her bed for the months of October and November.

She bought a test and cancelled the appointment but was terrified to take it. If she’d missed her shot in August, surely she should’ve gotten her period by now, right?

This wasn’t the kind of thing she could bring up over text while he was traveling. And they’d never really gotten into the habit of long phone conversations while he was away.

When the door opened on Sunday afternoon with a crash, she had fully prepared to broach the topic with him. Dropping his bags on the ground and kicking the door shut behind him, he collapsed onto the couch next to her and laid his head on her lap, causing her to nearly spill her tea.

“Rough night?”

“I think Theon cheated on his fiancé. At his bachelor party.”

“I mean, isn’t Theon kinda a shitty person to begin with?”

“No,” Theon had grown up across the street from the Starks and was always closer with Robb. Truth be told, Jon didn’t like the guy all that much. He’d used the word entitled several times when describing him to Dany. “Well, ok, yes. But I didn’t think he’d…”

Dany knew where his mind was going. “Jon, you can’t say anything. Don’t get involved.”

“She should know who she’s marrying.”

Dany leaned over Jon’s head to place her mug on the table. “It’s not your place. Let them figure it out.” She ran a hand through his hair as he pinched his brow.

“It’s just, she’s such a nice girl, Dany. She doesn’t deserve that. I mean, after all the time they’ve been together, for how good of an impact she’s made on him, for him to just throw it all away on one night with this random…”

Having no further interest in this conversation, Dany quaked her legs under Jon’s head, telling him to move. She stood and brought her tea with her to sit at a stool under the peninsula. He didn’t stop her.

He was projecting his own guilt onto Theon’s situation. He probably had no idea he was doing it, but Dany couldn’t take it, couldn’t assuage him of his pity party. Not today.

By the time his hands wrapped around her from behind and his lips found her neck, she had no interest in discussing their present _potential_ circumstance. While genuine, his affection was deliberate. He’d realized, too late, what he was doing and felt guilty for it, for not taking her feelings into consideration. Again. Her feelings always seemed to be an afterthought to him.

“I’m going to work from Missy’s parent’s house in Rhode Island on Wednesday.”

“You have Friday off, though, right?”

“We’re doing a spa day Friday.”

“What, since when?”

“We never get to see each other, we thought it'd be fun.” She hoped Missy would go along with this one.

“Ok. I’m sure you deserve it. Talisa’s going to miss you on thanksgiving.” He took note of her cool tone and didn’t force the issue. “Let me treat you.”

God damn him.

This was how it went. Whenever they heard other couples fighting, or stories of other couples’ fights, they’d feel superior. _They_ never fought.

But sometimes, Dany wondered if the fighting every now and again was better than this cold war stale mate they’d reach, every now and again. They’d get just to the precipice of an argument and they’d both back off; finding some way to assure the other of their love.

But was it enough?

Missy was thrilled when Dany had decided to come down a day early and stay a day longer. As were her parents and Grey. The Naath household was always warm and welcoming and Dany truly felt like family when she was there.

The whole family did the town’s Turkey trot in the morning, after which they hosted a breakfast for seemingly the entire town. Turkey dinner was tertiary to this meal and Dany loved it, having always thought the main course on thanksgiving to be vastly overrated. Why was dinner on holidays always at two in the afternoon, anyway?

“Are you eating around the onions?” Her best friend questioned as she sat next to her at the table, a mimosa in each hand, one offered to Dany. “I’m just not in the mood for them today.” She took the tiniest sip she could, and though it contained her favorite alcohol, the drink still just didn’t taste right.

Thankfully, there wasn’t much leisure time between cleaning up after breakfast and immediately preparing appetizers and dinner then of course cleaning up after dinner and setting the desserts; no one noticed how little she’d had to drink.

By the time the family was all gathered in the family room, packed on the large sectional couch and popping in It’s a Wonderful Life, Dany was ready for bed. She shut her eyes as Harry was falling into the ice and woke to George running through the streets screaming _Merry Christmas!_

Even missing most of the movie, she still felt herself tear up when the entire town was coming into the Bailey household and offering to help. The movie got her every time. 

Missy’s mother’s kiss on the forehead and “so glad you made it this year, honey,” also caused tears to well up in her eyes. The family knew her background and welcomed her with open arms, never did she feel pity or judgement from them. Just love.

It was a refreshing change.

They opted for at-home spa treatments on Friday; making their own cucumber water and relaxing in the hot-tub behind the house.

“I feel like I barely saw you yesterday.” Missy’s arms were stretched out on the lip of the tub, her head leaned back. “So give me all the details. How much are you dreading Christmas?”

Unable to hold back any longer, “I think I’m pregnant.”

Her friends arms windmilled into the water as she leaned forward. “I’m sorry, but what?!”

“I don’t know for sure yet. I haven’t taken the test.”

“But you have a test?”

“Yes.”

“How’d this happen?”

“Well, when a boy and a girl love each other very much…” Despite the circumstance, Dany couldn’t help herself.

“Oh fuck you. You know what mean.”

“I went to my doctor’s office when I got strep in August and they asked if I wanted a flu shot. I declined and asked for my Depo shot. They mixed up the two.”

“Wait you had strep in August _and_ October?” 

“Focus, Missy.”

Her friend met her gaze and flashed her palms,”sorry.”

“Does Jon know?”

Dany’s teeth gritted together and she drew her shoulders up in a faint shrug.

“So what exactly is your plan here? You do know that avoiding taking the test isn’t going to change the outcome, right?”

“I know, I just…” Dany slid her fingers through her hair and groaned. “I don’t know if I want it.”

“Have you and Jon ever talked about kids?”

“No, not really. Other than the fact that we both knew I was on birth control.”

“You’ve never done the _what if?_ ”

How was it that her friend knew exactly what was going on inside her mind?

“I mean, yes.”

“And?”

“Missy, he was raised in a super catholic house. What do you think?”

“So you’re afraid he’s going to make you keep it?”

“First of all, he’s not going to make me do anything.”

“Ok, poor choice of words on my part.” Missy was choosing her words carefully, “he’ll want to keep it because….”

“He’s not like, opposed to the practice as a whole. He agrees everyone should have the choice. It’s just, to him, he wouldn’t want to do it.” She and Jon had many conversations about the topic as it applied to society throughout the years and while she made it abundantly clear that she felt very strongly prochoice, Jon’s opinion on the topic was slightly murkier. 

“He’d never forgive me, though.”

“You’re not thinking of not telling him, right? Dany you cannot do that.”

“Honestly, I did think about that at first. But I couldn’t do that. I couldn’t lie to him like that.”

“Does _he_ want kids? Do _you_ want kids? Do you want kids with _him?_ ”

“He does. I mean, like I said, we’ve never explicitly talked about having kids but on occasion he’s referred to his hypothetical future children. Do I want kids? I don’t know. I don’t know how to be a good mother, I don’t want to fuck someone up the way my upbringing fucked me up.” 

And there it was. Her biggest reason for her apprehension. What if she couldn’t love her child? What if she was just like her own mother?

“Don’t hide behind your damage.”

“Excuse me?” Dany was offended.

“Look, I love you. But this is what you do. Whenever you’re faced with confronting your past, you ease your way out of the situation with the excuse that you’re _too fucked up to deal_.” Her friend slid around the tub to the seat next to her. “You’ve grown a lot in the past few years, but this is your pattern. Stop making excuses and face the hard part. So you had a shitty life growing up. You still had a roof over your head and clothes on your back. And a father who adored you.”

“You’re a real bitch, you know that?”

Missy wrapped an arm around Dany’s shoulders and pulled her head to her shoulder. “Life is pain, highness. Anyone who says differently is selling you something.”

An hour later, they sat on Missy’s bed awaiting the results. When the timer on Missy’s phone went off Dany didn’t even need to look at the test or her friend’s face.

“Well at least it explains why your boobs are bigger.”

Catelyn Stark’s worst fears had come true; her son had knocked up the girl he snuck around with and who was single handedly responsible for the loss of her precious Ygritte Snow.

She hadn’t told Jon expressly when she was coming home. She was pretty sure that he’d inferred from their discussions and texts that she was staying at Missy’s on Friday night. But she decided to face the situation and drove the hour and a half home early Friday evening. 

It wasn’t until she was inside the empty apartment that she noticed the text from him indicating he was meeting Pyp, Robb, Talisa, and Sansa for a drink in the city. He told her everyone said hi and they missed her (him most of all). As she was reading the message another one came through, a photo of everyone waiving at the camera.

He could be so fucking cute sometimes.

She decided against replying, in favor of him discovering her in bed when he got home.

Dany had always been a light sleeper, so she was completely surprised to wake up in the morning, wrapped in Jon’s arms and having no recollection of him joining her. Waking at her shifting in his arms, he nuzzled his nose into her neck and hummed.

“When did you get home?” She asked, squeezing his hand.

“When did _you_ get home?”

She couldn’t help the smile that crossed her lips. “Around seven.”

He leaned up on an elbow so he could look at her. “Why didn’t you tell me? You could’ve come out with us, or I could’ve come home.”

“It seemed like you were having a fun time, plus I was tired anyway.”

“It was nice to find a hot girl in my bed when I got home.”

“I figured you’d like that.”

“I’ve really missed you lately.”

“Me too.” She turned and gave a quick kiss to the arm reading beside her head.

“You’ve been so distant. Did I do something? I feel like, the last couple weeks, even when we’ve been here you haven’t been here.”

This was the opening she’d been hoping for when he’d come home from Theon’s bachelor party.

She sat up and crossed her legs under her, him following suit beside her.

“I have to tell you something and I’m really scared to.”

“Since when are you scared of anything?”

A half smile grabbed the corner of her lips, “far more often than you’d think.”

“Is this something bad? Should I be nervous?”

“No…well maybe? I don’t know. You shouldn’t be nervous but you will be nervous. Or at least I think you will.” She saw that her words were only deepening the confusion on his face. “I haven’t like killed anyone or broken any laws. It’s not that kinda thing.”

“Why don’t you tell me what kinda thing it is, and let me decide for myself how to feel? You’re kinda killing me here.”

She bit her lip, closed her eyes, squared her shoulders, and took a deep breath. “Jon, I’m pregnant.” And there it was. The words were out there now, floating in the air and propelled into the universe, never to be unsaid.

___________________________________

“Fuck.” _Fuck._

Of all the things he expected to come out of her mouth, that was never even on the list. Not yet, anyway.

“I thought you were—“

“I was. They messed up and I didn’t get my last shot.”

He was on his feed, pacing the small distance of their bedroom, a hand scratching at his head.

“Dany, this was not part of the plan.” He was talking to himself more than he was her, no accusation in his voice.

“When has _anything_ with us ever been part of the plan?”

She had a point.

“I’m sorry, I just was not expecting this. I need to process this. I have so many thoughts in my head right now.”

She stood in front of him and reached for his palm, squeezing it gently. “I get it. You’re taking it far better than I did.”

Wait a minute.

“When did you find out?”

“I started suspecting a few weeks ago. But I took the test today. Missy made me.”

“You told _Missy_ before you told me?” Confusion and hurt pulsed through him. Why didn’t she tell him.

“Please don’t be upset. I didn’t know how to feel. I couldn’t take us both reacting to the news at the same time.”

He stepped away from her and sat on the edge of the bed, elbows on his knees and head leaning forward, cradled by his palms.

“You thought about not keeping it.”

“I needed to think about options. We’ve never talked about kids.”

What was she talking about? “Of course we have.”

“Not in the context of you and me.”

He was sure they had. Whenever he mentioned the hypothetical children of his future, he always imagined them with her.

“Have you thought about it? In the context of you and me, I mean?”

The far off look which caressed her face and the small bit of her bottom lip answered before she could. He grasped her hand and pulled her to straddle his lap as he slid further back on the bed, all one fluid motion.

He kissed the tip of her nose and nuzzled close, “you have. You _haavee_.” He accused, teasing. 

“Once or twice.” She draped her arms over his shoulders, capturing her left wrist with her right hand.

Unable to put words to his emotions, he pulled her in and captured her lips; his hands massaging her thighs, gently pulling her hips closer.

“Is it weird that I’m kinda turned on?”

“I’m not sure of the protocol here,” she was definitely moving against him, “I’ve never had to tell my boyfriend I’m pregnant before.”

“Is your mother going to make us sleep in separate rooms?” She asked him a few weeks later.

Unbeknownst to her, this was a debate he’d begun on thanksgiving. As he explained away her absence for that holiday with the news that she’d be joining them all for the entire week of Christmas. 

Catelyn had told him Dany was more than welcome for the holiday but she’d have to share a room with Sansa and Arya and referenced something about her roof and her rules. To which Sansa immediately objected.

Tired of this argument, Jon had simply countered that either Dany was sharing a room with him or he would be seeking other accommodations. Catelyn had grudgingly relented; at least for the time being.

“I’m sure she’ll try.”

“Does she just not think we have sex? Like, I don’t get the point.”

“I think it’s more that she feels it’s disrespectful to her, in her own house.”

“But it’d be fine if we were married.”

“We’d have God’s blessing then.” He noted the amused expression on her face. “Look, I’m not saying it’s how I feel, it’s just… how it is.”

“Maybe you should tell her the thing she’s afraid of is already happening? I mean we can’t conceive another child right now.” She waived her hand in front of her stomach.

They’d met with a doctor and determined that Dany was nine weeks at thanksgiving. Marking the date of conception to Robb’s wedding. They did share a laugh at the irony of the fact that they were the ones to conceive a baby the night of his _brother’s_ wedding.

The debate on when to tell his family was had on an almost daily basis. Jon wanted to tell them at Christmas and Dany wanted to wait until she could put more than a door between her and the Stark family; anticipating a not great reception to the news for most of them.

By mid-December she was beginning to show, ever so subtly; but not to the untrained eye Dany argued.

One night, as they were sitting by the Christmas tree debating baby names, he broached the subject he’d been thinking about since she’d told him.

“You know, my family would take the news a lot better if…”

“Don’t.”

“Don’t what?”

“Don’t ask me to marry you just to appease your family. And we both know, when you say family, you mean your mother.”

“C’mon. You know me better than that.” 

“Don’t ask me out of _obligation_ , then.”

He didn’t know how to respond. Was there part of him that was uncomfortable with the thought of fathering a child outside of wedlock? Sure. But he wanted to marry her, if the circumstances had been different he probably would’ve asked her to marry him right after they graduated college.

“It’s not like that.”

She shifted to face him, “we don’t need a piece of paper to tell the world we love each other and our child. My parents were married and look how well that turned out?”

Just once, Jon had suggested Dany reach out to her mother to let her know. Her face was stone and her tone left no room for discussion. “Absolutely not,” she’d said.

“Dany—“

“It’s my turn. What about Wesley for a boy?”

He resigned himself to table the discussion, “hard veto.”

“But we could call him Wes.” She returned to her original position with her back leaned against his chest, his knuckles tracing circles on her stomach, just above where their child was growing.

“If Wes is in play, then I’m reintroducing Luke for consideration.” 

He was fairly certain they were never going to agree on a name.

In what felt like the blink of an eye, they were headed north early on the morning of December 23rd. The ride should’ve taken them around three hours, but along the way Dany discovered that pregnancy gave her motion sickness and they had to make several stops. Leave it to her to complete avoid morning sickness but develop this weird affliction.

They found themselves parked in front of the condo just after three. Dany had the audacity to think she was going to help carry the bags in.

“You realize I”m not an invalid, right?”

“Focus on not slipping on the ice at the door.”

Taking her purse and a bottle of wine, Dany slipped into the house and up the three flights of stairs, past all the bedrooms, to the main level.

“Look who finally decided to join us.” Robb teased as he reached for the bottle in her hand and pulled her in for a hug.

“I’m practically out of breath from those stairs.”

“They’re a great leg workout.” Arya called from the couch, where she, Sansa, and Talisa were chatting and drinking wine. There was Christmas music playing softly in the background; the good, old-timey stuff that Dany grew up on. There was a warm fire dancing in the massive fireplace.

“I love your mantle!” Dany moved closer to inspect the pine laid across the top, sparkling ornaments slipped in between the branches caught the light and gave the scene a dewey beauty.

“Dad built it the year we got the place.” Sansa said wistfully, from the couch just beside where she stood, a sad smile on her face. Involuntarily, Dany gently squeezed Sansa’s shoulder to offer comfort. The redhead didn’t immediately pull away as if her skin had been burned. She wanted to say that the first Christmas without her dad was the hardest too, but didn’t want to test her luck. 

She thought it was a beautiful tribute that Ned’s stocking hung on the mantle, next to Catelyn’s. Time had aged most of the stockings in that comfortable way, but there were two that stood out among the rest. When Dany realized why, she found herself close to tears.

The first was hung next to Robb’s and bore Talisa’s name. _The second…_

“You hung a stocking for _me?_ ” She turned to the room, her hand unconsciously at her abdomen.

Not looking at her this time, Sansa shrugged, “it’s tradition.”

By the time Jon appeared, Dany had recovered slightly and removed her coat and was greeting Catelyn.

“Jon, I thought you said you were leaving this morning?”

“The ride took longer than expected.”

“Sorry, that’s my fault. I get sometimes get carsick and the ride up was a bit rough.”

Well, it wasn’t not true, Jon thought.

“Did you guys get any runs in today?”

“Arya and I tried, but half the lifts were closed due to wind. Should be good tomorrow morning though. Talisa’s never skied stateside, and hasn’t skied since she was in high school, so that should provide some entertainment.”

“Dany, will you be making a fool of yourself on the bunny hills with me tomorrow?”

“I’ve never been skiing.” She answered, accepting a bottle of water from Jon.

“You’ll need something stronger than that if you’re to keep up with us tonight.” Arya nodded in her direction.

“What?”

“Tradition. Christmas eve eve we play drinking games and make a hungover breakfast tomorrow morning.” Sansa was certainly more talkative with her tonight.”

“Oh, I don’t know about that. Maybe I can make breakfast for all the hungover people in the morning.”

“No, no. Making the breakfast hungover is the penance.”

Dany looked at Jon, who nodded in agreement. She sat on the couch, her legs folded under her, “guess I’ll just have to document the activities then.”

“I’ve never known you to say no to free alcohol.” Talisa jested, an elbow nudging Dany’s arm.

“My stomach is still churning from the car ride.”

“Fine, but you are coming to rent skies with me in the morning. What else are you going to do while we’re here for an entire week?”

“I was looking forward to some rest and relaxation, to be honest. And maybe a soak or two in the hot-tub Jon told me about. My back is sore from sitting all day.” As the words left her mouth, Dany arched backward, palms pushing against the small of her back.”

Jon saw it happen. Sansa was at just the right angle and as her gaze moved from Dany to him, he was sure he looked like a deer caught in headlights.

“Oh my god! You’re pregnant.”

_God dammit, Sansa._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhhh....Dany's done got knocked up.
> 
> I hope it was clear that about a third of the way through we switched from Dany's POV to Jon's.
> 
> I am susceptible to _some_ fanfic tropes. And we all know she's gonna be pregnant in season 8. So let's say it's semi cannon?
> 
> This chapter was really difficult to write and i'm not sure it's the best it can be, but i needed to share it with you. While this chapter and the events which unfold during it have always been part of the story, i hadn't realized until earlier this month that if i timed it right, the christmas chapter would be coming out right at christmas!
> 
> Time kinda go away from me, so i forwent the past story that was _supposed_ to be chapter 13.
> 
> As i've said before, there are certain plot points that have been in my head since before i put pen to paper on this, and this was one of them. The next big one i've already started working on, even though it's still a few chapters away.
> 
> I really hope you all enjoyed. 
> 
> Thank you for all your amazing support of this story! I hope you all have a Merry Christmas!


	14. Handle with Care

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's song is: Handle with Care, by The Traveling Wilburys:  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1o4s1KVJaVA

The family had taken the news surprisingly well. Even Sansa.

Everyone that is, except for Catelyn who stared at them silently before collecting her cup of tea and book from the counter and wordlessly ascended the stairs to the master bedroom.

“Mum?” Jon had questioned as she passed him. She just held up her hand to quiet him and kept moving. Jon looked crestfallen.

Dany’s heart went out to him. She’d never disappoint any child of hers the way his mother had him. 

“Don’t let this ruin your mood,” Talisa ran a comforting hand up and down Dany’s arm. “This is such great news! When are you due?”

Dany allowed her attention to move from Jon to her friend, “June 15th. So the baby could have Jon’s birthday.”

“Do you know the sex?”

“Not yet, but we don’t know if we are going to find out.”

“You have to, otherwise you’re going to get all green and yellow at your baby shower.” Sansa joined them.

“Ya had to find something to do before me, huh Jon?” Robb gave a loud clap at his brother’s back.

“It’ll be nice for you to follow in my footsteps for a change.” A genuine smile curved his lips.

Later, they lay in bed, neither able to sleep. Jon tossed and turned, alternating between curling up behind her with a hand on her expanding abdomen and flat on his back, eyes open as he stare at the ceiling.

When he turned for the umpteenth time, Dany shifted in his arms. “Think you’ll be comfortable enough to stop moving by the time this one starts moving?” She placed her hand over his, “I don’t think I can handle a Stark rolling around next to me and inside of me.”

“Sorry.”

“Ok, I was trying to get you to laugh.”

“I’m gonna go get some water.”

“Jon, stay here. Stay with me. With _us_.”

“I’m not going to fall asleep anytime soon. You should rest.”

With that, his feet were in his slippers and carrying him out the door.

This was exactly why she didn’t want to tell them this trip. While Sansa’s reaction was a pleasant surprise, Catelyn’s was exactly what Dany anticipated.

Jon had never said anything, but Dany could easily see that his mother’s approval meant a great deal to him. Having recently learned that he was an altar boy as a child and gave out communion as an extraordinary minister throughout college, she could easily see how far he’d felt he’d fallen.

His faith was very important to him and was something which had brought him close to his mother at a young age.

They didn’t speak of religion much, but Dany knew he wished she would come to church with him even though he’d never really pushed the issue. Like Hamlet, he had trouble reconciling his corporeal existence with his rational faculty.

Jon Stark was the textbook definition of catholic guilt.

Checking her watch and realizing that she’d somehow dozed for half an hour, Dany noted that the bed beside her remained dormant. Wondering what kept him and secretly hoping he’d somehow fallen asleep on the couch upstairs, she threw the covers aside and sought out her weary boyfriend.

As she reached the second flight of stairs, her movements ceased. The voices of Jon and Catelyn Stark were drifting to her ears.

“I feel like I don’t know who you are, these last few years.”

“I’m me, I’ve always _been_ me.”

“But you’re not. Jon you were so driven and so caring, we didn’t even have to make rules for you when you were a teenager, you made your own.”

Dany could feel the tension in the air, two floors away from them.

“I didn’t think—“

“That’s exactly the problem! You didn’t think. You acted on impulse when you cheated on Ygritte, you fell into this relationship for lascivious reasons, and now you’ve gone and gotten Daenerys pregnant.”

Why was it, Dany thought, that Jon’s mother always preferred her full name? Her full name, which always seemed to sound like an insult coming from the elder woman’s mouth.

“I love her, mum. I have since…well, since I don’t even know when.”

“Of all of my children, I never thought you’d be the one to confuse love with lust.”

While mostly stoic, Jon did have a temper. Were Dany the one to be having this kind of an argument with him, she was certain it would rear it’s ugly head. But with his mother, her words seemed to have the opposite effect, making him more desperate for her approval.

“I trusted you with Ygritte. She was a good girl.”

“She was Jewish.”

His mother guffawed, “come now, do you think that would’ve mattered?”

“I don’t understand. Dany was raised catholic.” He paused. “Do you dislike her so much?”

“Daenerys is a fine girl, Jon. If she were one of Sansa, or Arya, or even Talisa’s friends, she’d be a fine acquaintance.”

,em>What the fuck did that mean?

“She’s not good enough for you.”

_Don’t hold back, lady._

“I think, of the two of us, I’m more fit to determine who and what is good enough for me.”

“Every decision you’ve made, since she’s been in you life, has been the wrong one.”

“Well, wait a minute here,”

“Think about it. Name one good thing that you’ve done because of her.”

“She dropped everything so she could be with me, with us, when dad died.”

“And that was very kind and noble of her. She was very gracious and helpful during that.”

“I don’t know that I would’ve gotten through that without her, mum. She lost her dad when she was eighteen. She knew exactly what I was going through, knew what I would go through.”

“I’d never discredit the aid she provided our family during that time.”

“Then what? What is it? What can she do to prove herself to you?”

_If he thinks I’m going to do anything to prove myself to a woman who’s just insulted my character for fifteen minutes, he’s got another thing coming._

“She’s a bad influence on you.”

_Wait till I tell him everyone’s jumping off a bridge, Catelyn._

“What, am I thirteen?” Dany heard the tread of his slippers shuffle across the carpet. Thank god she’d splurged for the indoor-outdoor soles.

“Jon, you’re having a child.”

“Would you rather she not have it?”

“You put yourself into a position that I cannot condone.”

_Well fuck you._

“We didn’t mean for it to happen.”

“No one _means_ for it to happen.”

“Look, I know it’s not the most ideal circumstance, but I’m happy, mum. I’m actually really happy. Dany gets me in a way that no one else has. Has my definition of right and wrong altered slightly? Sure. But the world isn’t black and white, and she’s teaching me that. Mum, if you even knew the shit she’s gone through and is still the person she is.”

While Dany did feel slightly guilty for eavesdropping, she was glad to bear witness to this conversation. Listening to this gave her more understanding into the Stark dynamic than anything Jon could’ve told her.

“Well I don’t have much of a choice now, do I?”

Catelyn had always been nice-ish to Dany. But hearing her harsh words and evident deep seeded resentment, Dany felt taken aback. As the faucet came on, she decided this was as good a time as any to sneak back to the bedroom without her late light stirring being noticed.

When Jon slipped under the covers an hour later, Dany pretended he woke her and turned to face him. The look he gave her melted her resolve. “You’re my two most important girls, you know that right?” He pulled her body as close to him as she could fathom, but it was in no way sexual.

“Girls?” was all she could manage.

He kissed her nose and caressed a thumb against her jaw; a slight blush coloring her cheeks. 

“I just have a feeling? Is that weird?” The way his love shone through his eyes drove her slightly mad. 

“I feel like it’s weirder that I have no idea?” She bit her bottom lip, “I feel like I should know since I’m the one feeding and sheltering our little parasite, but I’ve never had a strong feeling either way.”

“Next Christmas we’re going to have a child. How weird is that?”

True to form, the next morning when Dany woke, the Stark children were in the kitchen preparing a feast of a breakfast. She was surprised to find herself alone in bed and at such a late hour. Dany almost always woke when Jon started stirring. Something else to add to the list of things she could blame the on the baby.

Arya was first to notice her. “Look what the cat dragged in,” she teased over the cup of coffee steaming beneath her mouth. “Would you like some? I got the french vanilla you like.” The dark haired girl reached for the cabinet and then paused, “can you drink that, actually?”

“Doctor said one cup is fine. So make it a big cup?” 

“Coming up. Got almond milk too, thank you for introducing me to that.”

“Dany introduced you to almond milk, when?”

“When was it that we went out? What, August?”

“You went out?” Sansa looked confused.

“Arya came into the city one night before she went back to school and we went for karaoke in Davis and she had too much to drink so she crashed on the couch.” Jon placed a hand on Sansa’s shoulder to keep her in place as he moved behind her in the cramped kitchen, an armful of plates in his other hand.

Sansa rolled her eyes, “thanks for the invite guys,” and brushed past them and disappeared down the stairs.

Well there went any headway they’d made the night before.

The truth was, that night was Dany’s idea. She hadn’t spent much time with Arya but the time she had, she’d enjoyed the girl. Though very clearly more of a tomboy than she, Dany did feel somewhat akin to her.

“Don’t worry about her. She’s…temperamental?” Dany graciously accepted the coffee from Arya.

“That’s one way to put it.” The words were out of her mouth before she realized what she was saying. It was a tense moment as everyone paused and looked at her. A large smile crossed Arya’s face before a howling laugh escaped. Everyone else joined in soon after. Everyone except Catelyn. She realized the matriarch of the family was conspicuously absent.

“Mum’s gone out for a few runs with a friend. They’ll probably be in the lodge for hours, drinking and catching up they really only see each other this time of year.”

Dany’s mouth formed an “O” in understanding. She tried to hide her relief.

“Don’t worry, even when she’s here she’ll be giving you the cold shoulder.”

“Arya…” Jon cocked his head to the side at her.

“What? You want me to dance around the subject? Were you in this room last night?” She arched a brow in Dany’s direction, “spoiler alert, she is _not_ happy with you.”

Dany let out a hiccuped laugh at the absurdity of the situation, “anyone else? Line forms to the left.” She waived her hand to emphasize her point.

“Give her time,” Robb interjected, “she just needs to process it. She’s definitely secretly happy, she was already asking me and Talisa whens he can expect grand kids the day we told her we were engaged.”

Dany was tempted to point out that Catelyn wanted grandkids from him, not from her, but she held her tongue, grabbed the stack of forks on the counter, and took a seat at the table.

Luckily for Dany, the trip went on with out further incident and with as little interaction with Sansa or Catelyn as she could’ve hoped for.

By the time they were walking up the stairs to the apartment, Dany could say she actually kind of enjoyed herself. It may’ve helped that she was finally feeling less tired and more like herself. She was also noticing an increase if her desire for Jon, which was apparently very normal at this stage and something he had no qualms about complying to. But it would be nice to do it _not_ at his family’s ski condo.

A week or so after they got back, as she was sitting on the couch finishing up some work and Jon was in the kitchen preparing dinner, she felt it move for the first time. It felt like bubbles. It made her gasp audibly as she covered her hand where the movement happened.

“Everything ok?”

“Come here!”

By the time Jon had moved languidly over to her, the sensation had passed.

At the look of disappointment on his face when he realized what he’d missed, she teased. “Next time, get the led out.”

In March, Catelyn hosted a small get together after a memorial mass which was dedicated to Ned, on the one year anniversary of his passing.

At the house afterward, Dany expected to receive judgmental stares and whispered comments from Jon’s relatives; imagining the things Catelyn may’ve told them.

To her pleasant surprise, the Stark family members were far more kind to her than she could’ve anticipated. They were full of smiles and congratulations and questions about when the baby was due and if they were planning on staying in their apartment. It was a refreshing change from the cool atmosphere of Christmas and New Years.

She knew that they were kinda going into this blind and it was nice to receive encouragement, nice to not feel like she was a stain on their family crest.

It was only Catelyn who seemed upset by the news, Dany thought. Even Sansa had appeared pleased about the concept of a baby entering the family. Arya was clearly excited, being the youngest and never having a baby to play with. Robb and Talisa were probably the most supportive and Dany was once again thankful to have an ally in her boyfriend’s brother’s wife.

On an unseasonably warm Friday in April, Jon had texted her at work suggesting they invite the pair over and make use of the small patio off their apartment. When she replied that the space was barely large enough for the two of him, he sent back that he really just wanted an excuse to use the grill and open the windows. She couldn’t deny that it would be nice to have a warm breeze fill the apartment after a particularly blustery winter.

As Dany and Talisa chatted over the counter in the kitchen, Jon and Robb had decided to have a couple quick Mario Kart races on the Wii.

“Well, at least you’ve already been broken in by one of the man-children over there.” Talisa noted, turning on her stool to face Dany and taking a long sip of the red blend Dany had insisted she drink.

“Fucking seriously. I asked him why he needed three gaming systems and he looked at me as if I was the one with three heads. I’m pretty sure once the baby is old enough to hold things there’ll be a wii-mote in his or her hands.”

“Have you settled on a name yet?”

“Of course not. Complete stalemate.” The problem was that Dany could only thing of boys’ names and Jon could only come up with girls’ names. She had reminded him on several occasions, joking of course, that she was the one who filled out the birth certificate.

“Your shower’s coming up.”

“Don’t remind me.”

“Not excited about it?”

“Showers are always boring. And I swear if someone makes me play any stupid games, I’m walking out.”

“It’s out of my hands.” Talisa waved her off, “I am excited to finally meet the infamous Missy, though.”

“She told me you guys have been texting?”

“Yes, basically I’m just following her orders.”

Dany chuckled at that and sipped the sparkling water from her wine glass. “Sounds about right.”

“God you must be so excited.”

“Excited and nervous. It’s so weird when they give you the ultrasound and there’s this little alien looking thing, _with a tale,_ and you’re like wow that’s going on _inside of me_.”

“It’ll be nice to have someone to ask questions about, when it’s my turn.”

Dany raised a brow, “and exactly when will it be your turn?”

“Not for a while yet, we’re not ready. And we want to do a little bit of traveling first.”

“I wasn’t ready, until suddenly I was and had to be.”

“I feel like no one is ever _really_ ready.”

“That’s fair.”

Talisa hesitated before beginning her next sentence. “Catelyn and Sansa did RSVP that they’re going.”

“Even more reason to dread it.”

“Honestly, I think Catelyn’s gonna calm down about giving you a hard time.”

Dany had always tried to be patient with Jon’s family. She understood that their history left things to be desired, but one thought had been nagging at her since Sansa announced her pregnancy for her.

Standing on her tip toes for a minute before leaning in close, she whispered, “the thing is, I can deal with the bullshit from them. It doesn’t bother me. But I won’t, not even for one second, put up with my child being treated as second best.” She hadn’t voiced the concern until this very moment, but the fear was rooted deep within her. Her child would never know the harshness of a relative who resented your existence. Not as long as she could prevent it.

Talisa had been given bits and pieces of Dany’s history in piecemeal through Jon via Robb, she knew enough to know that asking for more was off limits.

“I need more wine,” Talisa announced as she gave herself a generous pour.

“Are you getting my wife drunk over there, Targaryen?” Robb’s didn’t even leave the TV as he wove Bowser in and out of obstacles and raised his hands in victory when he crossed the finish line ahead of Jon.

“I’m putting her in the mood for you.” Dany winked and elicited a small giggle from both Talisa and Robb. 

“She always this much of a handful?”

“These days she’s actually a little more than two handfuls,” a toothy grin spread across Jon’s lips as he quietly laughed at his own innuendo.

“Mature!” Dany called then leaned her elbows on the counter, shaking her head and rolling her eyes. “That,” she pointed, “is the father of my child.”

“Could be worse?” Talisa was awarded with a smirk from Dany. “Do you ever think about…”

“Think about what?”

“No, I feel like you’re going to think I’m weird.”

“I already do think you’re weird. What’s the question?”

“Well, it’s just that. Like as a society we don’t really talk about sex. I mean, sure we talk about it with some friends or whatever, and we make this big deal out of our first time.”

“Is there a point here somewhere?”

“I don’t know. I just feel like when you announce you’re pregnant you’re kinda saying like, hey we had sex.” Talisa paused, “am I making any sense?”

“You realize people do have sex? I mean for your sake, I sincerely hope so.”

Talisa shook her head. “It’s not that. It’s just weird to me that we celebrate the result of the act without talking about the act.”

“Do you want details of the act which lead to this?” Dany teased as she stood up and rubbed her belly.

“Honestly, there’s gotta be something good going on there if the two of you couldn’t stay away from each other.” Talisa’s eyes peeled back in horror immediately as the words left her mouth. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Dany waived her off, “and trust me, _there is._ ”

Talisa smiled conspiratorially at her, “of all the people you’ve been with, he’s the best?”

Dany laughed. “Ok, there haven’t been _that_ many.”

“Well how many have there been?”

Dany closed her eyes and thought for a moment. “Six, maybe seven? Definitely fewer than ten, for sure.”

“Ok. That’s fair.”

“And yes, he’s the best. Always has been.”

“How many people had you been with before him?”

“None.”

“Wait, what? He was your first?”

“I mean, in most senses of the word, yes.”

“Were you his?”

“Yes.”

“Do you know his number?”

“It’s not something we really discussed. But I’d approximate at three.”

“Wow. Well, they always say your first stays with you.”

“The thing about our first time—“ Dany was interrupted by the buzzer sounding, indicating the Thai food’s arrival.

The baby shower was the first weekend in May, at a hall in Jon’s home town. To Dany’s pleasant surprise, it was not as cheesy as she anticipated. There were blue and pink balloons and some baby bottle decorations, but there were no games. There was champagne flowing for the guests and the gifts were not wrapped.

The shower itself was fairly intimate, thrown by Missy and Talisa and attended by many of Jon’s aunts and cousins. Even Margaery managed to make it, which was more than Dany could’ve expected. Though they kept in acquainted contact, they hadn’t really seen each other since Dany left New York almost three years prior.

Gilly greeted her with a warm smile and a gentle hand on her stomach, saying very seriously that “it’s definitely a girl. I know these things.”

“Jon has thought the same, since early on.”

After her exchange with Gilly, Dany’s eyes landed on the gifts. There was everything she could’ve needed; a white crib and matching changing table, a car seat, a pack and play, wait was that an Uppa Baby stroller?!

As she was contemplating this, Catelyn and Sansa were suddenly at her side.

“I hope you like it.”

“That’s too much, far too much.”

The older woman smiled politely, “it’s the highest rated one out there, you want the best. You always want the best for your children.”

Sensing that she was referring to more than just a stroller, Dany could only reply with, “thank you, we’ll very much appreciate it.”

“Jon said your mother wouldn’t be making it? I was hoping to meet her.” The question seemed like a genuine inquiry, but it still cut.

“No, she won’t be here. We don’t really have a relationship and it’s for the best.”

“Your opinion on that may change when you have a child of your own. Being a parent… _complicated_ , and what seems best at the time may be the wrong move, in hindsight.”

“Thank you for the beautiful gift, and for coming.” Dany was not about to have this conversation today. She found herself annoyed at Jon for not explaining her past to his family. But she knew this was irrational as she’d asked him specifically not to tell them.

She went into labor three days before she was scheduled to be induced. Twenty eight hours later, at three in the morning on June 22, 2013 Audrey Grace Stark entered the world; stealing her father's birthday and both her parents' hearts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you all enjoyed this one! The rest of the story is fully mapped out and will end at chapter 20. There are some exciting things to come!
> 
> As it's almost New Years, I want to take a minute to really thank you all. I don't know that there are words to express how grateful I am to all of you wonderful readers who have been so supportive in this thing I dreamed up. I haven't written anything at all (apart from some eighty thousand business emails) in the past ten years and it's really amazing to receive a good reaction to this. Writing is a very vulnerable thing for me, it's like you're reaching a hand down your throat and pulling something from deep inside yourself.
> 
> Anyway, sorry to gush, but you are all basically the best.
> 
> I hope you have a safe and Happy New Years!


	15. Don't Stop

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's song is Don't Stop by Fleetwood Mac:  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TytGVo1O3_w

Dany bit her lip in concentration, perched on on the second and last step of the ladder, her hand moved blindly through the large cabinet above the fridge in search of the small french press she was sure had been relocated there when they needed to make room for Audrey’s bottles. So far all she’d found was a bit of dust and a lot of tupperware lids.

As she moved to the other side of the cabinet, her hand came in contact with what felt like the handle of a bag of some kind. Giving it a tug, she heard something else next to it scratch across the surface and move closer to her. Pausing a moment to reach slightly left, her hand came in contact with the object she’d been seeking.

With a triumphant smile, she captured the handle and descended the steps.

“Look what mommy found! Now I don’t have to make a whole pot and let it go to waste!”

Andrey squealed happily and banged her hands on the tray of her highchair. For a person so small, she certainly did have a lot of _stuff_.

Dany had grown used to these kind of one-sided conversations with her daughter. Lucky enough to have been able to work out an abridged work schedule after her maternity leave, they only had to put her in daycare three days a week.

It also didn’t hurt that six months after Audrey arrived, Jon moved to the private side of his industry and his compensation almost doubled overnight. They’d been saving and were tangentially thinking of house hunting, but even with their combined salaries (hers meager in comparison to his these days) they couldn’t afford anything in Somerville and had trouble agreeing on a next best location. For now they’d resigned themselves to deal with cluttered cabinets and toys _everywhere._

As she finished rinsing the french press and turned the electric kettle on, she reached to collapse the stool and put it away but hesitated. After a brief debate, she remounted the ladder and pulled the handle with earnest, briefly losing her balance and catching the top of the fridge as the bag fell to the floor in a cloud of dust. How long had it been up there?

Audrey’s face scrunched together before a little sneeze escaped her body, momentarily distracting her from her cheerios.

“Sorry baby, guess we’re gonna have to yell at daddy for not dusting up there, huh?”

At the thought of Jon, Dany glanced at the clock. It was just after two. He’d texted her at one thirty to let her know that his afternoon meeting was cancelled and he was going to hit the gym quickly then would be home. He was probably still an hour out.

She drew her attention back to the duffle now in the middle of her kitchen floor, curious. It was one of those vera bradley overnight bags that she’d never been interested in. It also certainly wasn’t Jon’s.

But then whose was it? How long had it been here? Was it unethical for her to open it?

_Fuck it, it’s in my house and it’s not like I’m opening mail addressed to someone else._

She slid the ladder away and dropped to the floor in front of the bag, her legs crossing underneath her.

She unzipped the bag and pulled the sides open, her eyes first coming in contact with a small package of condoms.

_Curious._

Moving those aside, she found a hair straightener, a model very similar to one she had right after college. It looked almost brand new.

The remaining contents of the bag were mostly unremarkable, toothbrush and toothpaste (the tube squeezed from the middle by some heathen), a couple plain shirts and a sweater from Jcrew that was actually kinda cute. No pajamas though.

_Interesting._

____________________________________________________________________________

The first thing Jon noticed as he unlocked the door to his building was the delectable scent which assaulted his tastebuds. Sending a silent prayer that it was coming from his apartment, he shut the door behind him and ascended the stairs.

Pushing his way in and dropping his bag to the floor next to the shoe tray, he spotted the crockpot on the counter.

“That smells amazing.” Dany was standing in the middle of the kitchen, moving about with Audrey in her arms.

“I had a random craving for Mexican, so we made a trip to the store this morning. Didn’t we? Yes we did.” She nuzzled the eleven month old’s cheek. Jon greeted her with a hand on her lower back and a brief kiss on the forehead before stealing Audrey from her arms.

He noted the drying tears on her cheeks and commented, “what’s wrong? Mommy being mean to you again?” She was smiling and tugging at the short whiskers of his beard. His daughter had been blessed with her mother’s coloring in skin and eyes, but the hair was all his. _Poor thing,_ he thought.

“She bumped her head on the cabinet and fell on her bum.”

“She’s dangerous now that she’s mobile.”

“You’re telling me. Just wait till she goes full on velociraptor and learns to open doors.”

“You _love_ that joke.”

Dany shrugged and opened the crockpot to check on the chicken. “What is it, a little before four? She’s probably cranky and if she goes down for a little while now, she’ll probably be ok to be put down at her normal bed time.”

“Leave the dirty work to me, huh?” He teased as he crossed the living room and dropped her in her crib with one of her plushy teething things. What were they called again?

Upon slipping out and leaving the door slightly ajar, he turned and noticed the bag on the coffee table. Why the fuck was that out? It’d been a good six years since he’d last seen it. Well, since he’d last _really_ seen it.

“I was looking for the french press this afternoon and came across that instead.” Dany said, noticing his stare and replacing the lid on the crockpot.

“So you took it down and rifled through it?” He asked, cautious.

“Yes, a random woman’s bag in my cabinet seemed a little out of the ordinary.” She arched a brow, “also, interesting that you knew exactly where it was.”

“Dany…” He didn’t want to do this now. Well not now or ever, if he was being honest.

“At first I figured it was Sansa’s or Arya’s. Then I briefly thought about Eloise, but that wouldn’t’ve made sense because that was only a one off thing.”

He sighed, already exasperated. 

“I know you well enough to know that you wouldn’t be sneaking around on me.”

“Come on, of course not.”

“So why do you have it, Jon?” Her gave nothing of her emotion.

“What was I supposed to do with it? Throwing it away felt wrong.”

“I get that, at first at least. But after all this time, what is the plan here? Gonna call her up and be like, ‘ _hey, sorry for everything, but here’s your bag?’_ ”

“I didn’t know what to do with it and it honestly hurt to look at it, so I stuffed it in that cabinet after it was evident she wasn’t going to speak with me ever again and completely forgot about it until we were moving things around for Audrey.”

“You could’ve thrown it away then.”

“Are you threatened by this?”

“Threatened? No. Mildly bothered because I don’t understand the motive behind literally holding onto the past? Yes.” She slipped past him. “I’m going to take a shower, haven’t had the chance for one since yesterday morning. Do what you want with it.”

 

The remainder of the evening went by, uneventful. By the time Dany was out of the shower and walking back into the living room in her pajamas with a towel wrapped around her head, he’d re-stored the bag.

If she wanted it to be thrown away, she’d have to do it herself, he decided. Either that, or ask him to do it himself. Until or unless that happened, he wasn’t going to deal with her weird, stoic, passive aggressive bullshit.

They ate their tacos and fed Audrey some cheese and avocado for dinner before putting her down and settling on the couch to watch a few episodes of Homeland; to which Robb and Talisa had gotten them hooked a few weeks prior.

When they went to bed that night, Jon realized how far away she felt. Though their physical relationship would probably be considered healthy by most standards, these days when they slept together, they mostly _slept_. Having a child was exhausting. 

On the days Dany worked, Jon brought Audrey to the daycare in his office building; which was a bonus for him because he got to sneak down and see her. On the days Dany and Audrey were at home together, Dany always seemed more busy and stressed thinking of the coming workday.

Fridays were nice because they had the opportunity to make time for each other, staying up a little later and talking, and _usually_ getting a little frisky.

It was weird how their relationship changed once Audrey arrived. Not that it was better or worse in any way, just that it was different. Of course, adding another human being to a relationship would obviously change its nature, but it was more than that. There was a part of him that combined with a part of her and made a new person. That was a miracle. 

Knowing that she’d grown a part of him inside of her changed their relationship, deepened it. They were universally tied to one another now, their lives having touched and their love having created a living, breathing, physical manifestation.

It was this thought that brought him to her; on this night and on many nights, seeking further affirmation of their connection and to dispel any negative interactions of the past. What mattered was what they had, what was tangible. 

____________________________________________________________________________

 

Dany winced as an elbow jabbed her squarely between her shoulder blades. She turned her head to see who had bumped her – it was all she could manage in the crowded bar – but it was impossible to discern who the culprit was in the sea of 20-somethings.  

_Why did I even agree to come out tonight?_

Dany sucked down the dregs of her vodka soda in annoyance. It was mostly water at this point.

_Even the vodka here sucks._

A dark, cramped, and bass-thumping bar in South Boston was the last place on earth Dany wanted to spend her Wednesday night. She probably hadn’t even been in a bar on a Wednesday since her bartending stint in grad school. Unlike the majority of the patrons tonight, she definitely wasn’t 25 anymore.

The only reason she was even there was to be a “team player,” something her immediate supervisor told her she needed to work on. Dany was a diligent independent worker, but she wasn’t social at work. She loved the cause she worked for, but the people… that was a different story. She knew she came off as distant and aloof, and she really didn’t care. She’d much rather spend her free time at home with Audrey.

Her daughter was about to turn a year old and she couldn’t fathom how that had happened so quickly. But they had just won a major grant, and Dany had written most of the proposal, so when the email suggesting “celebratory drinks!!!” went out, she felt both obligated to join and compelled to prove to her boss that she was not an ice queen.

She regretted it almost immediately. Not only was it in Southie – the complete opposite direction of her baby girl – it turned out to be dollar beer night, which meant the place was even more inundated with former frat boys wanting to relive their glory days, even at 6pm. The bartender rolled her eyes, visibly irritated, when Dany ordered a drink that required effort beyond popping the top off a bottle of cheap beer.

After the initial forced pleasantries while the first round of drinks hit their systems, Dany found herself observing the raucous conversation of her coworkers more than participating.  

Her back still sore, she snuck a peek at her watch. 8:07. She had lasted a solid two hours, and everyone around her was already drunk off the cheap booze. If she called an Uber now she’d be home in time tuck Audrey in, heat up a quick dinner, and be on the couch with Jon by the time Modern Family started.

“Alright guys, I’m calling it a night.”

To her surprise, she got a few warm smiles and “good to see you!” farewells. There was that, at least.

According to the app on her phone, it would still be 11 minutes before her Uber driver would arrive. The first official day of summer was still a few days away, but the temperature had recently soared into the mid 80s and apparently most of Boston was out and about enjoying the weather.

Dany slowly made her way to the front of the bar to wait outside. She leaned against a sign and gazed down the street, waiting for her car. They had opened up the windows to the bar and the sound of many conversations leaked onto the sidewalk. She had survived her fourth winter in Boston, and it only made the warm air feel that much sweeter. She was not built for the cold.

In the mix of conversations, a voice suddenly rang out louder than the rest. It was a bit slurred, but Dany recognized it instantly.

“ _Please._ Leave me alone!”

Dany snapped her head back in the direction of the bar. All she could see was the back of the head from which the voice was coming. There was a blonde guy in a black t-shirt leering over the girl, who was leaning against the half wall to the outside of the bar. His arms were on either side of her, gripping the wall behind her, preventing her from moving. There was no mistaking the long auburn hair: Sansa.

Sansa turned her face away from the blonde guy and Dany could make out her profile; she was definitely drunk, and definitely scared.

_Fuck._

Without thinking, Dany made her way back into the bar and weaved through the crowd to where the pair stood. She had moved too quickly to formulate a plan, and once she approached the blonde head and black t-shirt, she wasn’t quite sure what to do.

She tapped him on the shoulder.

“Excuse me.”

The guy didn’t respond. She tried again. In the bustling bar, he didn’t notice her presence.

_Well then…_

She turned slightly, wound up her arm, and put all of her weight into planting her elbow into his side. It did the trick. His attention diverted, he turned from Sansa and swung around to face Dany, furious.

“What the fuck?”

_“Dany?!”_

In spite of the situation at hand, Dany almost laughed. Was Sansa happy to see her?

“You are bothering that girl. She asked you to leave her alone, and now it’s time for you to do exactly that.”

Now that he was facing her, Dany could see what was written across the front of his t-shirt. FBI: Female Body Inspector. Was this guy for real?

“Listen, bitch, no one asked you.” He started to turn back to Sansa.

_Oh, hell no._

Dany ducked under his arm and forced her way between him and Sansa. She squared her shoulders and looked the creep directly in the eye.

“I am not leaving here without my friend. It is time for you to leave.”

He glared at Dany, and for an instant, she felt a flicker of fear too. The guy wasn’t particularly large – although she realized her barometer was a bit off due to her friendship with Drogo – but she had no idea what he was capable of doing. Why didn’t she grab the bouncer on her way back into the bar?

After a second that felt like an eternity, he broke her gaze and stumbled away mumbling, “bitch isn’t even worth it.”

Dany turned to Sansa, gripping her shoulders.

“Are you alright? Are you here alone? Who the hell was that guy?”

Sansa nodded, tears welling in her eyes.

“I came out with Jeyne,” she sniffled. “She left a little while ago. His name is Joffrey. I met him here a few weeks ago and he’s usually super nice, but tonight…”

The tears started streaming down Sansa’s cheeks. Despite the fact that she had never done so before in nearly three years of knowing each other, Dany hugged her tightly. To her surprise, Sansa hugged back, crying softly.

“It’s ok. I have an Uber that’s probably here by now. Let’s go.”

Dany grabbed Sansa’s hand and lead her to the entrance of the bar. She gave a quick description of Joffrey to the bouncer, a massive man with a scarred face. He nodded wearily.

“Oh, I know him. I’ll take care of it.”

The girls slid into the backseat of the waiting Honda Civic.

“Take a left up here,” Dany told the driver. “We’re going to a new address.”

After a moment of silence except for Dany directing the driver, she realized she was still clasping Sansa’s hand tightly. She let it go. Sansa looked at her, clearly unsure what to say.

“Thank you for helping me. I don’t know what I was thinking. I have the worst taste in men.”

“Oh trust me, I made plenty of mistakes over the years.”

The second it came out of her mouth, Dany realized what she had said and to whom. She knew _exactly_ how Sansa felt about some of her mistakes.

Whether Sansa was too upset to pick up on it, or too exhausted to make a jab, Dany didn’t know. The softness with which she spoke next was surprising.

“Dany…”

“Yeah?”

“Can you please not tell Jon about this? I just don’t want him to freak out. He gets so…”

“Protective? Exceedingly noble? A tad bit high strung?”

Sansa rolled her eyes. “I will _never_ hear the end of it.”

Dany hesitated, then reached over to squeeze Sansa’s hand once more. “I won’t tell him.”

Sansa gave her a small smile. “Thanks.”

The remaining ride to Sansa’s apartment was quick and quiet. Dany asked the driver to wait, then stepped out onto the curb alongside Sansa.

“You promise you’re going to be ok?”

“I promise. Thanks again.”

Dany debated giving her another hug; it’s how she’d treat anyone else in this situation. Instead, she stepped back awkwardly towards the car and gestured to the door.

“Just want to make sure you get in ok.”

Sansa nodded and climbed the stairs to her apartment. She unlocked the door and stepped inside.

Dany sunk into the backseat of the waiting car. As she reached to pull the door shut, she heard her name.

“Dany?”

Dany looked up to see Sansa standing in the doorway.

“I’ll see you this weekend?”

Dany paused. “You wouldn’t miss your nice’s first birthday, would you?”

“Ok. See you soon, then.” With a small smile, Sansa shut the door.

Twenty minutes later, Dany unlocked her own door, emotionally drained from the evening.

“Hey.” Jon greeted her with a quick kiss. He answered the unspoken question spread across her features, “she’s asleep. Has been for an hour or so now.” She was disappointed, but resigned to pop in and give Audrey a quick goodnight kiss before she went to bed. 

“Anyway, how’d it go? Does she still think you’re an ice queen?”

Dany collapsed onto the couch.

“You know what? I'm definitely not her favorite, but I think I made some progress.”

As excited as Dany was for Audrey’s first birthday and her cake smash, she was weary of Sansa. But not in the way she had been in the past. She wanted Sansa to feel comfortable and normal. 

For exactly this reason, she tested the waters and when it felt right, she asked Sansa if she wanted to meet for lunch the following week.

Thankfully, her employer had an emergency daycare which could be used, free of charge, for five days each year. On this day, Dany took such advantage.

Sansa had yet to find a full time office job and was working at a boutique on Newbury Street as a personal shopper. She agreed to meet Dany at a small outdoor cafe in Beacon Hill, a mid-way location compromise. 

Dany had arrived early and ordered a mimosa, she technically didn’t work on Fridays anyway; may as well make the most of it.

Sansa entered and sat down without her usual confidence. 

“Hi.”

“Hi.”

Dany was new at this, but she was sure they’d need to exchange more words in order to have an actual conversation.

“Look, Sansa”-

“Dany, I-“

They each began at once.

“Go ahead,” Dany raised her hand, encouraging.

“I don’t even know where, or how, to begin.” Sansa expelled a breath, was she nervous? “I guess I owe you a debt of gratitude.”

“You owe me nothing, Sansa.” Dany smiled kindly.

“Things got so turned around.” Sansa wasn’t making eye contact, “I know it wasn’t—isn’t—your fault. What happened with Jon and Ygritte, I mean.”

So she was going _there_ , right away.

Dany wasn’t sure whether it was best for her to speak, or to let Sansa continue.

“God, I’ve done it again, haven’t I?” Sansa was rambling to herself. “I can’t seem to do anything the right way.”

Dany smiled ironically at this, “me either.”

They shared a sincere laugh. At each other, at their circumstances, and at absurdity of everything.

When the server approached and asked if they needed more time, Sansa motioned toward Dany’s drink. “I’ll definitely need one of those.”

Another awkward silence fell over them, both wanting to say something, but neither knowing what.

“I owe you an apology.” Sansa finally stated.

“Can I ask you,” Dany searched for the words, “what did I do to offend you so?”

“It was never _you_. You actually made yourself impossibly difficult to dislike.”

‘What was it then?”

Sansa inhaled deeply and seemed to think for a moment. “You’ve heard of our family dynamic, I assume?”

“Yes.”

“Growing up, I always felt like there was this special club that Robb, Jon, and Arya had and even when they tried to include me, I just didn’t fit in. I was always just more sensitive than my brothers and sister and I tried to just keep my head down and be a good kid.”

“Ok,” Dany encouraged.

“My awkward phase lasted forever. My limbs grew before my coordination and I was just a mess of legs and bone. Then my junior year I suddenly had boobs and waist. The guys noticed, as did the girls.”  
“Sansa…” Dany was getting nervous about where this was going.

“Suddenly all of these guys started asking me out and instant messaging me and I didn’t know what to do, I was never used to the attention. I agreed to go to a winter dance with this senior, Ramsay and I was stupid enough to think that he liked me when all he wanted was…”

“Oh god,” Dany reached for Sansa’s hand, squeezing it, “I’m so sorry.”

Sansa waved her away, “oh no! No, no, no, he didn’t get what he wanted. I kneed him in the crotch when he lunged at me in his car and wouldn’t relent.”

“Solid move!”

“I got out of his car and walked home from where he’d parked. In my heels, through the snow. Thankfully it wasn’t all _that_ far.”

“So your situation the other night isn’t the first time a guy’s been aggressive with you?”

Sansa smiled and raised her eyebrows, “I mean, is there any woman walking this earth who hasn’t had at least one guy get aggressive with them?”

“It’s sad, but that is so fucking true.” Sansa was a lot more complex than Dany had ever realized, but she was gaining serious respect for the girl.

“The following Monday, he’d spread rumors that we had hooked up. From there on out it just got worse. Guys I didn’t even know were claiming to have had sex with me and all the girls were just mean to me because they thought I was some kind of man eater about to steal their boyfriends. I can’t even tell you the number of mean notes stuffed into my locker; calling me a slut, a whore, saying they hated me.”

“Did you tell anyone?”

“I should have, I know that looking back. But at the time I just felt like that would make it worse. And I couldn’t tell my dad because he would’ve been at those boys’ houses with a baseball bat, or worse.”

“For what it’s worth, I’m pretty sure Jon or Robb would’ve done the same.” 

Sansa’s hands had made their way to her lap, her fingers twisting together. A half smile tugged at her lip, “also something I know now.”

“Hindsight’s a hell of a bitch, huh?”

“I was in a bad place, a really bad place. I don’t think I even realized how bad, until I had come out of it a little.”

“And that’s when you met Ygritte.”

“She was different too, but she was just immediately my person in the family, if that makes sense? She was smarmy as hell and she just…she just got me. She knew that something was broken and wanted to help me fix it.”

“Did she?”

“I don’t think intentionally.” Sansa tilted her head in thought, “no, that’s not what I mean. I guess…she wasn’t intrusive, but she just helped me see the light at the end of the tunnel that was high school. Told me stories about people being mean to her when she was younger. Forced Jon to hang out with me, helped me to see beyond what others thought and said and to not let it bother me. I guess above all, _she cared_.”

Sensing that Sansa’s monologue had come to an end, “I’m so sorry for what you’ve gone through and for the fact that stupid decisions Jon and I made affected you. I’m more sorry than I think I can express.”

By this time they’d both finished their drinks and when the waitress came over Dany answered her question before she could voice it, “yes, two more. Thanks.”

“I guess I’m a late bloomer in more ways than I realized. It was unfair of me to treat you so coldly for so long. Immature really.”

Two full flutes were plunked in front of them. “Yesterday’s gone. No use stressing about it. If I may impart some wisdom it took me too long to learn?”

Sansa nodded slowly.

“I realized when Audrey came into my life that it’s not the past that matters, it’s the future. Fix what you can, but let go of what you can’t because it’s just going to weigh you down.”

“That’s a bit poetic. I guess creating a life will do that to you, huh?” Sansa joked.

“Honestly, Sansa, the hardest part of bringing a child into the world, is knowing that at some point their beautiful, innocent idealism is going to be crushed and there’s nothing you can do about it.”

“If anyone fucks with my niece, I’ll be on their doorstep with a baseball bat.” Both women chuckled at that and clinked their glasses together in cheers.

The conversation from there was light and, dare Dany say, pleasant. Dany decided to leave the story of her own unhappy childhood for another day. Something good was beginning and it was already born out of something unfortunate. 

When Sansa suggested one final drink, Dany couldn’t say no. Instead she drafted a quick text to Jon and let him know he was going to have to pick Audrey up from daycare. She’d give him the highlights of the day and omit the reason for her meeting with Sansa.

It was also at this moment Dany decided to be just a little bold. “So, what ever happened with you and Pyp at Robb’s wedding?”

Sansa almost spit her drink. “What? What are you talking about?”

“Don’t play innocent with me,” Dany playfully accused, “just because I was drunk and on my way to conceive my daughter—“

Sansa raised a hand in protest, “TMI! TMI!” She covered hands to the side of her head, “earmuffs!”

“Either you tell me what happened with Pyp, or I’ll give you gratuitous details about your brother’s sexual prowess.”

Sansa shook her head and stuck out her tongue. “Eww, ok enough! I’ll spill, I’ll spill!”

She explained that while they didn’t exactly round home plate, they did make their way around a few bases. Pyp was a gentleman, though, and didn’t think it was right to move too fast that night; he couldn’t do that to his two best friends’ sister.

While it took some prodding, Sansa did admit he’d spent the night at her apartment on at least a few occasions while visiting from New York. They hadn’t seen each other in several months and Sansa did seem a little disappointed at that.

They had kept in touch though and had exchanged some suggestive texts.

“The trouble is, he’s there and I’m here. Neither one of us wants to do a long distance thing, but neither of us can seem to quit each other either.”

“I know the feeling.”

“Dany, he’s just so funny. And like, he can be an asshole, but that’s all a show. You know? And like, every time I think I’ve met someone else who’s a nice guy, they turn out to be an actual asshole.”

Dany did know, _all too well_. “Well he’ll be up at least a few times this summer, won’t he?”

Sansa smiled, sheepish “we’ve already talked about hanging out.”

“I have a good feeling about this. Things have a weird way of working out, especially when you least expect it.”

Dany handed the server her card before the bill could be delivered, hushing Sansa’s objection. “Honestly, it’s basically Jon’s money anyway.” She shrugged.

“This was fun. I mean really fun. I want to do this again.”

Dany thought for a moment, it was Friday after all. When she picked up her phone she had a missed call and several messages from Jon inquiring as to why their daughter was at daycare and was everything ok. 

Deciding to answer his question with what would inevitably leave him more confused, she replied, “everything’s fine. Just got a little drunk at brunch with Sansa. She’s coming for dinner. You should probably also pick up more booze.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't anticipate getting this chapter up so quickly, but it demanded to be written, so here we are.
> 
> First and foremost, I can't take sole credit for this chapter, my very good friend and fellow GoT enthusiast has been silently reading along and has been a sounding board for my obsessive, narcissistic ramblings about this in real life is the one who dreamed up and wrote the bar scene through Dany getting home to Jon. It's fabulous and better than most of what I write, so a big shout out to her. She's now officially joined! muchas gracias to InBoccaAlLupo!
> 
> I know there's been a lot of opinions on Sansa and I hope this gives some insight into her actions. i actually love her character in the show and really appreciate her growth throughout the years. While this is a Jonerys story at its heart, it's also about the impact _their_ relationship has on their _other_ relationships.
> 
> To be completely honest, I didn't expect to put Pyp and Sansa together, but like she said, they couldn't stay away from each other.
> 
> I am not sure I'll be able to post this weekend, I'm supposed to be away on a ski trip with some friends but we're also getting a blizzard on Thursday when we're supposed to leave and the temperatures at the mountain are anticipated to be _very_ cold.
> 
> As always thanks for your attention to this story! It truly means the world to me.


	16. Both Hands

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some of you have been waiting for this chapter for a while. Others may not like it. 
> 
> This song's chapter is Both Hands b Ani Defranco, HIGHLY recommend listening to or reading the lyrics.
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EEU9T_6uNFc

The sun streaming in through the open curtains jarred her awake. She squinted her swollen eyes and rolled over, bringing a pillow to block the light over her head.

Her head, which was throbbing.

Where did Jon keep his ibuprofen, she wondering automatically.

Jon.

_Jon._

_Fuck._

As realization rained on her body, she shot up in bed like an arrow.

As she took in her surroundings, one thought was paramount above others.

_Where the fuck was she?_

Vague memories assaulted her already pounding brain. Getting off the train yesterday, jumping into Jon’s arms like they were in a cheesy movie. Seeing the Boston waterfront, seeing Jon’s new apartment. Seeing Jon’s new bedroom…

Going to that hole in the wall bar he always spoke of. Finally meeting Pyp and seeing Sam again. He was applying to Med Schools, or thinking of it?

_New York._

_People_ in New York.

_Daenerys._

_Fucking_ Daenerys.

Fucking _JON_ and Daenerys.

Jon _fucking_ Daenerys.

Ygritte brought her knees up flush with her chest, cradling her head between kneecaps, her arms hugging her shins.

She felt butterflies in her stomach, but not in the nervous excited way. In a way that made her think she’d never be hungry again.

She was baffled, beyond. If she were a celebrity, she’d have been convinced Ashton Kutcher was about to bust into her hotel room to let her know she’d just been punk’d. 

But wait, how had she gotten here? How had she gotten a hotel room?

She remembered walking away from Jon. She remembered finding herself in Chinatown and walking past a few seedy looking strip clubs. 

Oh, the hotel bar. On the waterfront. It was freezing. She’d gone in, not for a drink but to warm up and try to charge her phone. It was after midnight when a kind man came over and asked why she was alone. Having elected to continue to drink while her battery grew, she was still quite tipsy.

“I’m supposed to be visiting my boyfriend.”

“Where is he?” The man had asked.

“Not sure.”

“Do you need to call him?”

“No.”

“Are you alright?”

“No.” She took a sip of her drink, “he’s been fucking Daenerys. For three years.”

The man smiled at her sympathetically.

“Do you have a place to say for the night?”

“No. He’s the only person I know in this city.”

Before she realized what was happening, the man snapped his fingers at the bartender and pointed his middle and index fingers at himself. The bartender nodded in understanding.

“Listen…”

“Ygritte.”

“Beautiful name for a beautiful girl. Listen Ygritte, I am a partial owner of this hotel. We’ve not much vacancy tonight, but there is a suite which is unoccupied. Allan over there is going to charge your drinks and the room to me.”

She looked to him confused. 

“You’ll owe me nothing. Get your rest and get home safely tomorrow.”

“I,” she fumbled, “I don’t know what to say.”

He placed a paternal hand on her back, “you don’t have to say anything. You’re in a bad way right now and I’m in a position to help you back onto your feet. Just promise me one thing?”

“Sure?”

“Someday, when you find yourself in my position and come upon someone in need of help, you’ll do what you can.”

Ygritte wrapped both hands around the glass in front of her, tracing her thumbs up and down on the condensation. “I will. Thank you, Sir.”

Her phone chimed from the bureau, where she must’ve dropped it after plugging the charger in.

Bracing herself, Ygritte flung the covers aside, surprised to realize she was just wearing a tank top and her briefs. _Do it like a bandaid, she thought._

Fifty seven unready messages, fifteen missed calls, and her voicemail was full.

Not ready to face reality just yet, she padded to the bathroom and filled a glass with water. Upon downing the first and second pours, she topped it off and slipped back into the bed.

For what it was worth, the bed was excruciatingly comfortable.

____________________________________________________________________________

Standing in the middle of South station, obsessively checking the digital board which displayed the train schedule, Ygritte snuck a glimpse at her watch. Again.

As angry as she was, as hurt as she was, she was secretly hoping to live out one of those dramatic scenes from a RomCom, and look up to find Jon running into the train station, begging her not to leave.

When the five minute warning appeared on the screen above her, the pit in her stomach grew deeper and she paced to the platform to board her train, sullen as fuck.

As the train lunged ahead, leaving Boston further and further behind her, Ygritte vowed to do the same.

____________________________________________________________________________

She awoke, her pillow still damp, at seven o’clock on Saturday night; having dragged her purse into her room and immediately collapsed on her bed. 

She had more missed calls and texts than she could count. Any she deleted any that had evidently come from Jon.

Her parents had both called several times. She’d forgotten about the panicked calls she’s made to them the previous night, before the kindness of the stranger.

Karsi texted that she had called Jon and Daenerys out on Facebook, so everyone would know what they did to her. 

That was _the last thing_ Ygritte wanted.

Her friend also invited herself over that night for wine and pizza.

While the former sounded palpable the latter did not. Ygritte felt as if she’d never be hungry again.

She was lost in thought when the knock came. With a deep inhale, she threw the covers aside and allowed her friend entrance.

Karsi had a bottle of Arbor Mist tucked under her arm and a box of pizza in her hands. 

“Hi.” 

“So, do we need to cut his balls off?”

“I don’t want to talk about it, but it’s also all I want to talk about? I’ve been sad for the past twenty four hours and every time I have no more tears left, I remember what’s happened and it starts over again.”

“I can’t believe it. Honestly, I never would’ve thought he was capable of something like this.”

“If he hadn’t said it, to my face, I wouldn’t believe it either.”

“He must’ve called me fifty times last night.”

“Did you speak with him?”

“No. I finally texted him today and told him to fuck off.”

“Did he reply?”  
“No.”

“How do you do that to someone? He supposedly loved me. How do you just…not care?”

“He’s a sociopath, he lied to you without batting an eye. You deserve so much more.”

Ygritte had told herself as much so many times in the past twenty four hours and while she realized this on an intellectual level, it didn’t lessen the hurt.

She wasn’t sure how she survived the remainder of the semester; the first half of which was spent sleeping, studying, going to class, and repeating. She opted out of a spring break trip with her friends in favor of a trip to see her parents at their condo in Florida.

They were worried for her, she told them she was fine. She looked thin and they tried to ply her with carbohydrate dense food, and some if it honestly did taste good.

Being with her parents was nice. It had been a long time, longer than she could remember, since she’d spent quality time with them. 

It was in April that she learned she’d been invited back to senator Lincoln’s office in D.C., with a permanent position. It was the first good news she felt she’d received in all of 2008. She’d be starting after the Fourth of July break. 

Her salary would be small and she’d probably have to live in a dump, but she’d beat out more than 300 competitors for the position. And she’d have the opportunity to have direct access to the senator. Albeit very minimal, but she’d take what she could get.

It was when she started that she realized the majority of her job was answering calls from angry constituents. They always had to answer the phone, had to listen to the complaints, take notes, and write summaries for the senator.

Although the job itself wasn’t what she dreamed of doing, she felt plugged in. There was a buzz surrounding her at all times and it was exciting. She genuinely believed that the senator’s goal was to support his constituents and to further an agenda in the best interest of his state and his country.

It was halfway through her first year in D.C. that part of her faith in the system was broken. She saw one of her married coworkers go home with another congressional aid after a fundraiser. He’d never once been inappropriate with her, but the fact that another person she trusted had been less than virtuous rattled her.

For the first year or so, she had no interest in dating. Having decided the best thing was to focus on furthering her career and not get side tracked with personal matters. She also felt like she needed to remember who she was before her relationship with Jon.

As Presidents’ Day 2009 rolled around and she felt the sting of the events of the previous year, she reflected on the ways her life had altered. As she took stock, she felt surprisingly pleased with the way things had gone.

It was on St. Patrick’s day of that same year, when she was at a bar with a few friends from work and their friends of friends, she met Josh. He’d been waiting in line for a drink at the bar when she accidentally crashed into him on her way in. He joked that she should wait her turn and she gestured to her hair and explained that it was her holiday. He relented and offered to buy her a drink, sufficiently pleased when she requested a guinness.

He was surprised when she told him she wasn’t Irish and even more surprised when, after only two drinks, she’d agreed to go home with him.

She was into him and she thought she was ready to break her dry spell. But, her body felt differently. As much as they tried, it just wouldn’t work. She rolled away from him and felt tears slipping down her cheeks. He told her it was ok. He was sorry if he pushed things.

It wasn’t him. He couldn’t understand. He was such a nice guy. She felt bad for him, to have taken home someone so broken.

She’d never had trouble with interpersonal relationships until Jon. He’d taken everything she had and left her nothing to spare. She’d always been a trusting person and felt that if she gave her best self to the world, she’d be returned in kind.

She hated this state of self pity in which she’d found herself. Even over a year after the dissolution of their relationship, the slightest reminder of what happened sent her spiraling.

It was at this time that she found herself taking a step back, trying to look outside her life and the choices that she’d made. She needed to understand what it was that she couldn’t move past.

She met with psychologists; she met with psychics,. She wanted her mind and her body to be in synch.

Either, or both, helped her to realize that it wasn’t so much her former boyfriend that she missed, but more the security with which he came. She was an only child that was warmly welcomed into a family of six. She felt wanted and needed.

The problem was also the feeling of betrayal that had torn through her. She lost the ability to trust her intuition thanks to being lied to by a person she trusted implicitly. 

Her therapist suggested that she was afraid of being alone; not just without a relationship, but without family. The Starks had given her family without question and that was ripped away from her in mere _minutes._

It may’ve been the doctor’s words, or time, but a few months later she found herself back in Josh’s bed and this time things went far better than she could’ve anticipated. 

He was _fun._

She enjoyed his company.

But she wanted nothing more than what they had; that one night. Sure, it would’ve been easy to find herself in a situation where she pined after him, but she didn’t have the interest for it. She could’ve cared for him, but she didn’t care to. 

Her boss at work was only a few years older than she, but from their first meeting, she knew they’d had a special connection. He was a good manager who wanted all his employees to succeed, but he was more than that to her. It was in no way inappropriate, as some may’ve interpreted.

He understood her, he empathized with her, and he wanted to see her succeed in her career. At times, she felt like an imposter. He told her that he saw her achieving a great many things, at a time she just wanted to keep her head down and focus on the task at hand. He taught her the importance of constructive feedback. The kind given with sincerity, the kind only brought by genuine consideration.

Her small group of friends in the D.C. area had teased her about the amount of time she spent speaking of her amazing boss, and how her feelings on him were probably more than platonic. She did question it herself on one or two occasions, but realized that it was just them getting inside her head.

It wasn’t until he explained that he was heavily involved in his church that she understood. He was like Jon, but safe. He was a male figure who cared about her in a completely non-sexual way, but he had some of the attributes of her first love. That must’ve been what drew her to him, and he seemed to sense that she’d been through a rough time. He cared for her in the most genuine and platonic of ways, at a time when she needed exactly that. 

He was married with a child and another on the way. His wife was the most adorable, sweet, christian woman, she’d ever met. They were a genuinely happy couple. They welcomed her into their life as a friend and babysitter of their children.

He’d joked that he was paying her twice, but it was exactly that, a joke.

In their time working together, he became more than just a sounding board, he became a trusted friend. She’d told him the entire Jon saga and he threatened to beat up the man if they ever came face to face.

Ygritte learned so much from him about how to maintain herself in a stressful atmosphere, how to not take things so personally, and how to work smarter. Thanks to him, her confidence in herself grew.

She’d always had her parents, of course. They loved her and left her wanting for little as she grew up in a small town in Vermont. She loved them dearly but they didn’t always get along. They didn’t understand why she would want to live so far away, to get engaged so deeply into politics. They were painstakingly proud of her, to a fault. But she secretly knew they worried what the neighbors would think.

It was thanks to her boss’s guidance that in early 2010 she felt comfortable to apply for and attain a position as a senior staff assistant. As such, her main responsibility would be handling escalated issues and overseeing the communication with the Vermont office.

She was nervous to take the position, but in it she excelled; receiving multiple commendations from the senator himself. In what felt like the blink of an eye, she’d held the position for two years and was being encouraged to apply for a position as the deputy director of communications for senator Murphy.

On an exceptionally warm day in March of 2012, she set off for her second interview. As she sat in the uncomfortable chairs outside the office, she decided to occupy herself by taking a peek at facebook. As she unlocked her phone and opened the app, a notification popped up. It read “one new message from Daenerys Targaryen.”

Her pulse accelerated and she immediately locked her phone and tried not to think of what the woman could possibly have to say to her.

Her mind raced with possibilities.

_Sorry I fucked your boyfriend behind your back and was nice to your face._

_Just wanted to let you know that guy you slept with in DC? Yeah, I’ve been secretly sleeping with him too._

She cut the thoughts short and forced herself to practice a brief mindfulness exercise of focusing on her breathing to bring her back to the moment.

As they called her name, she found herself surprisingly calm. She stood, straighten her skirt and jacket and picking up up her leather briefcase, and gave a firm handshake to her interviewer. 

The meeting was short; the director of communications receiving an urgent email and apologizing for it’s brevity. When she stood to thank him for his time, his eyes never left his blackberry. 

“You’ll be able to train a replacement for your old job quickly?”

“I”m sorry?”

“We’ll need you to start as soon as possible. I’ll have Margaret contact your current manager to arrange the transition.”

“Thank you,” was all she could say. Internally she was jumping for joy. She was twenty six years old and assuming the position of Deputy Director of Communications to a senator!

When she opened up her Facebook app as she sat on the Metro, she remembered the reason for her heart palpitations earlier in the day.

With the feeling of invincibility brought on by a really good fucking day, she opened the message.

_“Hey Ygritte, I know this is a little weird, but I wanted to let you know that Ned Stark passed away unexpectedly last night. Sansa is having a really difficult time with it and I know you both were close. I don’t mean to overstep my boundaries here, but I just thought you should know, for her sake. All the best, Daenerys.”_

Ygritte sat back and let the contents of the message sink in.

_What._

_The._

_Fuck._

Her first emotion was sadness. The man was one of the kindest and genuine she’d met. One summer night she’d stayed up with him after everyone, including Jon, had gone to bed. He’d had more to drink than she’d ever seen and talked to her about philosophy and ethics and she felt like a better person because of it. 

She’d loved Ned Stark.

But…

She’d also loved Jon Stark.

She felt so torn. 

Hang on a sec. Why the fuck did Daenerys know about this? Had she seen it on Facebook and taken it upon herself to message Ygritte from New York? No that didn’t feel right.

She clicked on Daenerys’ name to view her profile.

And there it was. Her cover photo was some beach theme—could she _be_ more cliche—but her profile photo was a group selfie, with Daenerys front and center. She was leaning on Jon, her arms wrapped around his neck, smiling wide. Of course he had that closed lip grin on his face and his hair was gelled to the side. To his left was the photographer, a woman Ygritte had never seen. Behind Daenerys stood what Ygritte could only assume was the elusive Robb Stark, his arms wrapped around Daenerys in a mirror to hers on Jon, but he was looking away from the camera, presumably laughing at something.

_Well then._

Ygritte locked her phone and sat back to think for a minute.

A part of her was surprised at how little she was surprised. 

She’d gone to extensive lengths to extricate herself from anything having to do with the two of them and apparently they’d done the exact opposite with each other. 

Though she couldn’t see much from Daenerys’ profile, her current city was Boston. It wasn’t difficult to infer the rest.

Ygritte had spent a decent amount of time on a women’s counsel and reviewing gender relations as they applied to gender politics and she tried to remove Jon from the situation.

Dany wasn’t the one who’d betrayed her, though she did act like a shady motherfucker. But Jon was the one who’d cut her deep. And if nothing else, she’d learned in the past few years that women needed to stand together in solidarity, even if they disliked each other.

Ygritte respected that Dany put herself out there to message her. Sansa was such a unique heart and there was no doubt Jon would’ve been uncomfortable with it. 

_God Damn Daenerys for doing this to her._

Etiquette getting the best of her, Ygritte replied, “Thank You.”

It took her a day and a half, but Ygritte finally determined the method with which she’d reach out to Sansa. Email was the best avenue as she’d long ago extracted any Stark from her existence. 

She told Sansa that she’d heard about the loss of her father and how horribly she felt for her. She told her that she was sorry for the abrupt ending of their friendship and for never reaching out, but that she needed an open beginning and the past was full of old wounds. She told her that she’d never stopped thinking of her and that if she ever really needed her, her number hadn’t changed. She didn’t blame her for the sins of her brother. She told her Sansa she loved her and was championing her in any way she could.

Ygritte really did feel for the girl, and she’d rather the option to shelter the poor girl and receive her pain in ten fold than to see her suffer any more. Her high school classmates were _fucking cruel._

Sansa didn’t respond, and Ygritte understood. She’d betrayed her in a similar way that Jon had betrayed her. She abandoned someone for whom she said she’d cared.

She did her best to put the past in the rearview and plunge forward. In the middle of 2014, her former manager made her aware of a new Digital Director position being created for Senator Lincoln. He thought she was the perfect fit for the job; having been the only senior staffer employed during the rise of social media and with communications experience. She was honored at the suggestion and shocked when she barely needed to interview for the appointment.

She was finally in a high level position, crafting digital communication strategy. She gave her briefs directly to the senator himself. At her word, information was shared with his hundreds of thousands of followers and millions of constituents. Her voice mattered.

By 2015, she was bringing home a higher salary than her father ever had. At the age of twenty nine, Ygritte found herself in a higher position of power than the manager who’d mentored her. Instead of jealousy or bitterness, he expressed kindness and affirmation that she was on the path he knew was right for her. He’d offered her a week in his family home on Nantucket the week of labor day, knowing she’d developed a love for the Massachusetts coast in her college years.

Ygritte was more than grateful, invited her closest staff members, and barely felt a dull reminder as to the reason for her initial introduction to Cape Cod. The idea of warm sand on her feet, a cool drink in her hand, and not a single legislative policy for an entire week (save for emails sent to her blackberry) left her salivating for the break.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First and foremost: The MARVELOUS ice-and-fire-trash created this incredible image based on Dany's profile picture in this chapter: https://ice-and-fire-trash.tumblr.com/image/170309314278 
> 
> So, I know this isn't really a Jon and Dany chapter. But I have been so excited to share Ygritte's story with you, literally this entire time.
> 
> The biggest of thanks go to my ~as of yet~ unnamed buddy who helped me get through this chapter and to whom i owe mucho prosecco.
> 
> I know a few of you were worried that I was going to make her crazy and a bitch, and it's been so hard for me to not directly tell you "No, she is _my girl_. 
> 
> As i've said, i want this to be as real as possible and that means Ygritte is a sweet, kind, unfortunate bystander. She's a person that was hurt and she fucking rose from the ashes.
> 
> Ok. I promise the next chapter will be more Jon and Dany. And....well, i guess you'll see.
> 
> Thanks, as always, for your incredible support of my story. I <3 you all so much!


	17. Hold On

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's song:  
> Alabama Shakes, Hold On.  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Le-3MIBxQTw

“We’re home!” Dany bent over to let Audrey run to Jon, who’d turned from the pan on the stove at their entrance. He quickly picked her up over his head and brought her down to blow raspberries on her belly; at which she giggled and clapped her hands in excitement. The sight warmed Dany’s heart, as it always did.

Dropping his daughter to his hip, hit paced a few steps over and greeted Dany with a chaste forehead kiss.

“I’m making tacos, I know it’s not officially taco Tuesday, but the snack lady in Trader Joe’s had tacos as a sample and I couldn’t resist…”

“You love the snack lady a little to much. Should I be worried?”

“Well, she always cooks for me.” He shrugged and hoisted Audrey to give her a kiss on the nose before letter her down to explore their baby proofed apartment. “Anyway, I’ve got some news.”

“Oh?” Dany was shrugging off her jacket and stepping out of her boots. 

“Sam and Gilly got engaged over Christmas!”

“It took them a month to tell you?”

“Well, to tell anyone really. They were at his family’s place out in Utah and then they had that crazy trip they’ve been talking about for a year now.”

“Oh right!” Dany had completely forgotten about their three week vacation all over Europe. She’d actually learned of the engagement earlier that same day via a text from Sansa, who was freaking out because Pyp had texted to tell _her_ the news.

In the past eight months, her relationship with Sansa had vastly improved. She wouldn’t call the eldest Stark daughter her best friend, but they were definitely _friends_ and Dany considered that a win.

The tricky part was that neither Jon nor Robb knew about the various interactions that had been happening between Pyp and Sansa over the last year or so. Sansa had begged her not to tell and Dany couldn’t force herself to break the confidence of their newly formed relationship. This of course meant that she was keeping a pretty big secret from Jon.

Even though it wasn’t her secret to tell.

Even though _she_ wasn’t keeping a secret.

“Do they have a date yet?” _She already knew_

“They’re thinking May 9th in the Berkshires.”

“That would be beautiful. I haven’t been out there at that time of year in forever.”

Though Dany hadn’t spent much time in western Mass in her life, in the time she did, she’d had the opportunity to venture to the Berkshires a time or two; it was breathtaking.

“Are you going to be in the wedding?”

“I think he wants me to be.” He was hesitating.

“But?”

“It’s a no kids wedding.”

And there was the rub.

After seeing Sansa’s text earlier, she’d already imagined Jon as a groomsman, posing for a photo with Audrey, a photo which hung over the mantle above the fireplace in the house they didn’t yet own.

“Well, it’s their wedding. They should feel comfortable doing whatever they want.”

“I’m sure Robb and Talisa would be willing to watch her.” Jon added, “I think they pulled the goalie. So they’re gonna need all the practice they can get.”

Dany had a sense as to where Jon was leading this conversation. Their birth control situation since Audrey had been precarious to say the least. She didn’t want to go back on hormonal birth control while she was breastfeeding and she really wanted an IUD. The only problem with those being they weren’t recommended for women planning additional births within a year or so. The _or so_ was what they struggled with.

Dany wasn’t convinced she wanted anything more than Audrey. Jon, on the other hand, wanted as many as they could have; used to growing up in a packed house.

It wasn’t what she’d call a point of contention and there had certainly been a few occasions where they were both _in the moment_ and forgetful. Thankfully, in Dany’s opinion, they’d been in the clear _so far._

“A night away? Is that what you’re offering me?” She smiled and raised her brows, suggestive. “It will be nice to have you to myself…” 

Jon pulled her into a loose hug, staring down. “Oh, I’ve already got _plans_ for you.”

Sansa confided in her earlier in the day that Pyp asked if she’d be his guest to the wedding. She said no, she wasn’t ready for their _whatever it was_ , as she’d called it, to be out in the open. He’d seemed a little disappointed, but understood. Sansa did feel bad for declining, to her their relationship was still too ambiguous to expose.

Dany understood this, and wanted to tell Sansa that Jon would too, but even after a year, their friendship was too fresh for Dany to feel comfortable pushing the issue.

Sam tapped his brother for best man; Jon, Pyp, and his childhood friend Will being his groomsman.

Dany was excited she’d have an excuse to spend all adult time with Missy at the wedding while Jon was preoccupied. Even with her living just two hours away, her best friend may as well have still been in Denver for how often they saw each other.

When she received an invitation to the bachelorette party, which was the same night as the bachelor party, April 18th, 2015, Dany was a little surprised. Gilly was a super sweet girl and Dany enjoyed her company, but she didn’t feel close enough to accept the invitation.

Jon wanted her to go. There was a big plan for the parties to meet up at the end of the night and he thought it would be a fun kind of college reunion. But Dany didn’t know most of the girls going and was secretly convinced their agenda was to check on their significant others after they’d gone to a strip club; Dany didn’t care. She’d given Jon free reign to go and have a lap dance and drink with his friends, and his brother.

Although Robb and Sam weren’t all that close, and although Robb was not invited to the wedding, Sam said that he’d be happy to have both Stark brothers along for the fun.

The benefit of skipping the party was also that she had an excuse to hang out with Missy for a night, while their men got drunk and made fools of themselves together. Dany was excited.

Missy, who was engaged herself and getting married in September.

The night of, she ordered pizza from her favorite spot, set out an assortment of dessert treats, and bought several bottles of prosecco. She’d also invited Talisa and Sansa. Arya couldn’t make it because she was twenty four and had better things to do, obviously.

The plan was to do sheet masks on their faces, eat an obscene amount of pizza, gossip, and watch terrible movies, all while getting _gloriously_ toasted.

Missy was the first to arrive, a giant overnight bag on one shoulder and Dany’s bridesmaids dress draped over the other. All of which she threw to the floor as she pulled her best friend into a close hug.

“I’m so excited to see you!”

“I missed you so much!”

Dany immediately handed her prosecco and teased her best friend for dropping her two hundred dollar dress on the floor.

Missy told her all about the wedding planning and how her sister was driving her nuts and she wished Dany was her maid of honor, decreeing that she was still the _best maid._ Her sister had planned a weekend away in Nashville in July and Dany wasn’t going to be able to attend, much to both women’s disappointment.

By the time Talisa and Sansa showed up, Missy and Dany had polished off the better part of the first bottle the popped and were sitting on the couch deep in conversation.

After greeting them both with a hug, Dany held the bottle up in offering.

“Yes please!” Sansa was quick to accept.

“You got it. Talisa? You want this? We have other stuff too, if you’re interested.”

Talisa opened her tote and produced several bottles of seltzer, “I’m driving tonight, so I’m gonna stick to the nonalcoholic bubbles.

Dany nodded in acknowledgement but gave Talisa a skeptical glance.

“Where’s Audrey?”

“She’s asleep. If we’re lucky, she’ll sleep through.”

Sansa looked crestfallen, “aw. I was hoping to snuggle with her a little.”

“You keep her up and you can deal with the grumpy toddler tomorrow.”

Sansa accepted the flute Dany offered her, “fair point.”

“The good news is that she’s got the sleeping habits of her father and could probably sleep through a stampede running through the living room.”

After much argument back and forth, they settled on The Devil Wears Prada for their movie; which they ended up mostly talking through.

It was into the fourth bottle that Dany let it slip that Jon wanted another baby. And that he was somewhat wearing her down on the subject.

“Are you two ever going to get married or are you just going to continue to live in sin to spite my mother?”

Dany shrugged and attempted cover her emotions, “if it’s not broke, don’t fix it!” Missy met her eyes briefly and sipped her drink. They’d spoken a little earlier about the topic of how many kids they each wanted and Dany and Jon’s marital status. Dany didn’t feel like opening that topic up for discussion in committee.

Sensing the awkward tension which had settled, Talisa spoke up. “Well, Audrey isn’t going to be the only Stark grand child for much longer.”

“You mean?!” Sansa was out of her seat with excitement, happy tears welling in her eyes, arms thrown around her sister in law.

“Oh my god! Talisa this is amazing!” Dany pulled her into a hug as soon as Sansa was willing to let go.

“Do you know the gender? When are you due? Are you thinking of names?”

Talisa chuckled, “one question at a time. Not yet it’s too early, November 20th, and we’re not going to tell the name until the baby is born.”

“Jon had told me you were letting nature take it’s course, that happened so fast!?

“Yeah, we were lucky in that regard. I mean, we’ve known that the Stark men have no problem with virility.” Talisa winked.

“Guys. C’mon, don’t ruin this for me.” Sansa said, with a look of disgust on her face.

“Oh Sansa, if only you’d seen your brother and Dany in college…” Missy jested, sipping her drink and her eyes bulging as she immediately realizing the words that had escaped her mouth. “I mean, um.”

Surprising everyone, Sansa shook her head and waved her off. “Ancient history,” raising a glass to send a cheers through the air to Missy.

“Sorry, I didn’t want to steal the attention of the night. I just have been dying to tell anyone. But I’m just barely nine weeks and Robb is incredibly superstitious about those things.”

“Better to tell us now, otherwise Sansa would probably out you too.” Dany said with a chuckle.

“Hey! I didn’t mean to!”

“No?”

“I mean, I was just surprised, and didn’t have time to filter the thought from my brain before I word vomited it out my mouth.”

“Catelyn is going to be ecstatic. She’ll probably claim she’s _over the moon_.”

Sansa agreed with Dany, “oh my god, she’s going to have two grand kids to brag about now? She’s gonna start buying stuff on amazon probably within five minutes of you telling her.”

“I can attest to that. Every time we see her, she hands me _bags_ of toys and clothes for Audrey. I don’t know where she thinks any of this stuff fits in this apartment.”

“Oh she’s been in Robb’s ear about getting a house closer to her, outside the city.”

Sansa interrupted to mock, _“the city is no place for a child to grow up.”_

Dany couldn’t help the outburst of laughter that she released. After her giggles subsided, “she says the same to Jon and then some, I’m sure.”

“You could always move to Rhode Island and be closer to me!” Missy joined.

“Oh she would _love_ that.” Sansa was in a sarcastic mood tonight.

“What’s keeping you guys here?” Talisa posed the question to Dany.

“Honestly, for the longest time we really couldn’t afford much of a house and now, it kinda feels like retreating? Waving some sort of white flag to say we’re not young enough and not hip enough and not cool enough anymore.” Then she added, “plus, thats my last remaining excuse as to why we can’t have another kid.” She was half joking.

“You’re seriously considering it, aren’t you?” Sansa was nothing if not intuitive.

“It’s getting harder to say no, in all honesty. I just feel like there’ll be no time to do anything and I don’t want the fact that I’m a mother to define my identity.”

“I think you’re overthinking this,” Missy assured, “remember what we talked about when you visited me and Grey in Colorado? Stop avoiding the hard conversations. Be honest and face whatever comes with it.”

The next morning, Jon and Grey walked into the apartment looking as tired and groggy as Dany felt. But they did bring coffee and breakfast sandwiches for Dany and Missy. And a chocolate milk for Audrey, of course.

Missy held Audrey in her lap, on the floor by all of her toys, attempting to teach the girl patty cakes.

“Watch out, Grey. That’s what’s in your future.” Jon smiled as he extracted the coffees from the tray and emptied the sandwiches from the bag.

“You don’t seem to be complaining too much.”

“True.”

“Hey,” Dany reached for her coffee and Jon pulled it away, “gotta pay the taxes first.” He leaned down an brushed his lips to hers. “So, how was last night?” He asked, handing her the cup and her sandwich.

“It was a lot of fun. We were up until almost two in the morning. Poor Talisa then had to drive Sansa home. The not fun part? When your daughter woke me up at six and my hangover set in.”

“ _My daughter,_ huh?” He raised a brow.

Finally realizing that Jon was home, Audrey extracted herself from Missy’s lap and ran to give his legs a hug. Picking her up and wrapping her legs around him as best he could so she was eye level, “how’s my girl? Did you miss me?” He nuzzled his whiskers against her cheek and she squealed in delight.

Several hours after they’d bid their goodbyes to Grey and Missy, when Audrey was napping and Jon was trying to get a head start on work for the week as he sat on the couch with the Red Sox / Orioles game on in the background. Every few minutes he’d look at the TV and yell something Dany didn’t understand.

“Not playing well today?”

Jon let out an annoyed sigh, “they haven’t played well this entire series.”

“Well I learned something last night that I think will distract you from this.”

“I bet I know what it is.” Jon said in a sing-song voice.

“I bet you don’t” She played along.

“If is that Talisa is pregnant, then I definitely don’t know what it is.”

“Hey! Not fair!” She swatted at him. “Talisa said they’d agreed not to say anything until next month!”

“Yet she said something to you?”

“Well yeah, but Robb was the one who wanted to keep it quiet!”

“Cause that makes such a difference.” He teased.

“Your mom is going to flip her shit.” She corrected, “in a good way, I mean. Think about how much she gave me and she doesn’t even like me!”

“Dany…”

“I’m kidding, I’m kidding.” She was only half kidding. As much as her relationship with the Stark matriarch had improved, often times Dany still felt as though the older woman simply _tolerated_ her presence. Her biggest fear had ended up being unfounded, as Catelyn absolutely _adored_ Audrey.

“That realtor sent me a list of a bunch of open houses on the South Shore for next weekend. Do you want to take a chance in and go to a few?”

“Do you want to live that far away from the city?”

“You’re being dramatic. It takes an hour, at _most_ to get in town. And that’s by car! The commuter rail and the commuter boat don’t even take that long!”

“You’re not factoring in rush hour traffic. You should know better than I how awful 93 is in the morning and evening.”

“That’s why I mentioned the train and boat.” He sat up straighter and put his computer on the coffee table, “look, we can look around here, but the schools in those towns are top notch. The taxes in some of them are surprisingly low, and yes, I’d like to be closer to my mother.”

She knew he could see her resistance crumbling.

“Robb and Talisa are talking about moving too.”

“Out of the city?”

“They want to be able to spread out. Plus, if we all lived on the South Shore, we could talk about going in on a boat together.”

“Jesus, when did a boat enter the picture here?”

“Nothing crazy, just a 30-35 footer that we could share and play around with in the summer.”

“You speak as if I understand ship terminology.”

“Boat, it’s a boat.” He corrected automatically.

“Really?”

“Ok, we don’t have to think about a boat just yet.”

“Is this your way of wearing me down to move?”

“Is it working?”

“Jon.”

“Let’s just look. Get our feet wet.”

“Fine. But I’m not going to like anything.” At his gaze, “but I’ll try, ok?”

The following Saturday, Dany found herself enjoying streets and views of the small suburbs. Realizing immediately how much friendlier the drivers were and how much better the roads were. After leaving the third open house and she realized she was disappointed by the fact that she didn’t like any of the houses.

As they were headed back to the highway, one last open house sign caught her eye, “Jon, take a right up here.”

“Why?”

“There’s another house.”

“You want to look at another house?”“You’re complaining?”  
He turned without further instruction. After a few additional confusing and winding roads, they pulled up in front of a small victorian with a porch that wrapped around the entire house and overlooked the water. Dany was awestruck.

“Jon.”

“You like it?”

“Jon.”

“You’re gonna have to give me more than that.”

“This is our house.”

“You haven’t seen the inside, and we don’t know the asking. Waterfront homes aren’t exactly in our price range.”

“I just know. I don’t know how, but I just know.”

Their offer was accepted on the spot and their closing was set for the first week in June.

They also decided to stop actively trying to prevent pregnancy. On Dany’s contingency that the shitty, uncomfortable white couch in their Somerville apartment be thrown away or donated, either of which she didn’t care. Her beautiful new house would not see the likes of that monstrosity.

Sam’s wedding was fun, albeit _exceedingly_ traditional. It was nice to meet his family and to see Jon letting lose with his friends, just like in college.

As Dany was weighing the pros and cons of one last drink, Pyp slid into the chair next to her.

“Princess, have you been ignoring me all night?”

“I was doing that thing where I avoid you to make you pay attention to me, Pyp.”

He scooted his chair over and draped an arm around her back, slouching. “Here let’s make Jonny boy jealous.”

“You miss Sansa tonight?”

He slid away from her and reached for his beer on the table, chuckling. “Going right for the jugular, eh Dany?

“I think, in the time I’ve known you, I can count on one hand the times you’ve called me by my real name.”

“Don’t get used to it, highness.”

“You want to tell Jon.”

“I’m scared shitless to tell Jon and Robb, but I feel guilty by the lie of omission. It’s hard to explain.”

Dany huffed, “cause I know nothing about sneaking around behind someone’s back.”

“Touché.”

“I think Sansa is afraid of the fluidity of it.”

“Come again?”

“She doesn’t want to expose…whatever it is that you have, or, are?” She shook her head in confusion, “I think the long distance thing confuses her.”

“It confuses me too.”

“Do you want to see her more? Spend more time with her?”

“Of course. She’s…it’s hard to explain. I just. I feel. No,” he paused, “she feels…” He trailed off.

“It feels right in a way nothing else has felt right before?”

“Yes. That’s exactly it.”

“Will you take some advice from your queen?”

“Always have respected the royal opinion.”

“Instead of trying to find a reason why it’s not going to work, find a reason for it to work. Take it from someone who probably could’ve spared some people pain by accepting my feelings earlier.”

“Pyp, if you’re done flirting with the mother of my children.” Jon reached a hand in Dany’s direction, inviting her to the dance floor.

“Children?”

Dany winked at him and accepted Jon’s offer.

It was a few days later that Sansa told her Pyp was officially relocating to Boston; she called her immediately upon reading the message.

“He wants to tell Jon and Robb.” Sansa babbled into the phone in greeting.

“You don’t think this will go well?”

“Seeing as the one time I was drunk at eighteen and they were going to a friend’s house and he told me I was welcomed to join but they closed the door before me and told me to go to bed; no Dany. No, I don't think it’s a good idea.”

“Now, why do you think that?”

“Dany, I’m their sister. They’re not going to roll over and accept the fact that their mutual best friend has been in my bed.”

The girl had a point. _But…_

“Do you care for him?”

“I didn't want to. I didn't intend to. But I do.”

“I say fuck ‘em.”

“What?!” Sansa shirked.

“Look, he’s clearly coming back this way because of you.” Dany took her silence as agreement and decided to omit the details of her conversation with Pyp at Sam’s wedding. “It’s been a couple years, Sansa. So, regardless of what Robb thinks, of what Jon thinks, do what feels right _for you.”_

Dany knew she was taking a chance. She realized her metaphor was thinly veiled.

“You’re right.” After a few shaky breaths Dany heard, “we’re finally doing this.”

The stars aligned well enough for Pyp’s move back to Boston to coincide with Jon and Dany moving to their new house. Jon contacted the landlord and vouched for Pyp’s character and the fact that he wouldn’t trash the apartment. It was either this assurance, the background and credit checks coming up clean, or the idea of not having to go through the pain of listing and showing the apartment that swayed the landlord to allow Jon and Dany to turn the keys over to Pyp upon moving out, no security deposit required.

Of course, they did so on the one condition that he help with their move.

_______________________________________________________________

Jon and Robb sat across from Pyp in one of their favorite tables at Mike’s, just down the street from Pyp’s new apartment. Which was Jon’s old apartment. And Robb’s _older_ apartment.

“Ya miss it here yet?” Pyp teased Jon.

“The vicinity to this place? Yes. This place’s newfound vicinity to you? Not as much.”

“Love you too, Jon-o.”

“So, Pyp, how many girls have run screaming from you since you’ve been back in the city?” Robb jested as he sipped his beer.

“It’s actually funny you should bring that up.”

Pyp was squirming. More so than usual, at least.

“What’s up, Pyp?”

“I’ve actually been kinda seeing someone. For kinda while now.”

“Pyp, you’ve been in Boston for what, a month? How’d you meet a girl so fast?” Jon was amazed, Pyp never talked about seeing girls let alone seeing girls for a _while_.

“Well, that’s the thing, fellas. It’s a girl from Boston.”

“Pyp! You did not move back here for a girl!” Jon was flabbergasted.

“Dude, she must be something to convince you to move back for her.” Robb was more demure with his reply. “Let’s see a pic of this one.”

“Guys, I don’t know how to tell you this.”

“Dude, just spit it out!”

“It’s Sansa.”

“I’m sorry, what?” Jon was sure he’d misheard Pyp.

“We kinda reconnected at Robb’s wedding.”

“Hang on, hang on, hang on” Jon raised his hand and gestured it side to side in the middle of the table. “Woah, woah, woah, woah. You’re saying that you’ve been talking to Sansa, our sister, for..” He paused and pointed furiously between himself and Robb, “ almost year and a half, is that right? It has to be, the wedding was, what 2013?”

“Yes.”

“ _What the fuck, Pyp._ ”

“This is why she didn’t want to tell you guys.”

“Dude, you’re our best friend. How could you not tell us?” Jon was furious, betrayed.

“Calm down, Jon.” Robb scolded. “Pyp, you swear you’re not being a dick to our sister?”

“I mean, no more so than usual.”

“Pyp, cut the shit.”

“Guys, I moved back for her. I promise. I think…I think this is the real thing.”

“Or maybe you just want to be a Stark that badly.”

“Wow, Jon. Don’t hold back.”

“You lied to us, to our family, for years. I don’t know how you expect me to take that.”

“Honestly, Robb was the one I was worried about. I figured you had enough experience with hiding relationships from people you cared about to understand.”

“Pyp, c’mon. That’s not fair and you know it.” Robb was speaking. Jon couldn’t form a coherent sentence to save his life.

“And then! And then, Dany, he threw our relationship at me, he was just trying to be a dick.” Jon had been reciting the night’s events to Dany as he changed for bed.

“Jon…”

“Who the fuck does he think he is? He’s living in _our_ apartment now, remember that?”

“Jon…”

“He had the audacity to tell me he loves Sansa. That guy doesn’t know love from a hole in the wall.”

“Jon!”

He pulled his t-shirt over his head and turned to her. “What? What is it?”

“You care for your sisters, no one doubts that.”

“Dany, that’s not—“

“I think you need to trust her judgement.”

“It’s funny hearing that come from you.”

“You’re literally doing to me exactly what Pyp did to you earlier. You realize that, right?”

Jon sat on the bed with a huff, leaning against the headboard and pinching the bridge of his nose.

“I”m sorry.”

“Don’t tell me you’re sorry. I’m used to your shit.”

“Besides,” she slid over and straddled his lap, “Sansa and I worked past it. It took us a long time. Probably too long, but we did. We worked past it. And now I adore her. And I trust her. I trust her instincts. You should too.”

Jon traced his hands up her sides; just being with her, like this, was soothing.

“You’re saying I overreacted?”

“I mean, you _reacted_. That’s human. But this is your best friend and your sister. They’re two people you love. I think you need to remove your own emotions from the situation and just support them.”

“When did you get so emotionally intelligent?”

“Probably around the you started getting me pregnant.”

God damn she was sexy.

“About that…” He tried to pull her in for a kiss but she put her hands on his chest, stopping his movements. “What is it?” He asked, confused.

She bit her lip, “well, there’s no more _trying_ necessary.”

“You mean?”

“Audrey’s gonna have a brother or sister.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I have good news and bad news.
> 
> BUT FIRST; my friend, ghost writer, and unintended beta, officially has joined us. So please warmly welcome InBoccaAlLupo, and praise her for her writing on chapter 15! MUAH!
> 
> Bad news is that what I planned for this chapter and what this chapter ended up being, didn't coincide.  
> Good News is that this now means the story will be 21 chapters long.
> 
> Hopefully that's a win-win for everyone.
> 
> It just didn't feel right plunging ahead with so much unresolved. I also realize these last few chapters are covering a lot of ground, so...here you go.
> 
> Happy to hear your thoughts, as always. And honored to anyone who's reading and lurking, #IRespectThat
> 
> Thanks for continuing this journey with me!


	18. Hurt Somebody

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This Chapter's song is: Hurt Somebody, by Noah Kahan
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZdsER1S3t8k

Jon checked his watch for the fourth time since he’d gotten in the deli line, his foot now impatiently tapping on the ground in front of him.

Though start time the annual Stark family Labor Day cookout and lobster bake was not set in stone, Jon liked to get up and get moving whenever he had what he considered a _drive_ ahead of him. Dany had tested his patience with tardiness on various occasions throughout their relationship, of which she was well aware.

Of course, this was significantly different. A twenty-six month old’s nap was nothing to mess with, as he and Dany learned the hard way, on several occasions.

He had wanted to push through, they only had maybe twenty five minutes left in the car until they got to the Cape house, but Audrey was apparently just as stubborn as her mother when it came to knowing, and getting, what she wanted.

They needed to grab some groceries and alcohol anyway, so it wasn’t like they were losing too much time. But he was already in a not so great mood today, the events of last night weighing on his mind and this detour not helping.

Jon couldn’t say why he felt so anxious, but he just wanted to _get_ there. To get out of the car.

When the butcher finally called his number, Jon realized he had no idea what he was supposed to order. Dany was the one who’d made the list and she’d departed in search of a bathroom somewhere in this shopping complex.

Unwilling to get back in line, he rattled off a list of cold cuts and pasta and potato salads. Why was it that mayonnaise made something a salad, he wondered.

“Don’t forget the scallops and mussels .” Robb materialized from thin air, “Sansa and Arya got the lobsters and steamers.” He noticed the contents of Jon’s shopping basket. “Jesus, did you get a pound of every meat they have?”

“I was too anxious about how long it took to order that I never thought about what it was I was supposed to order.”

Jon watched as his daughter slowly raised her head off her uncle’s chest, wet tears from the most recent tantrum still drying on her puffy cheeks.

“Someone’s cheered up.” He reached a thumb to Audrey’s soft cheek, at which she immediately pouted her lips and turned into her uncle’s shoulder.

“Not for dad I guess.” Robb craned his neck back to look at the grumpy toddler.

“Sir, that it?”

“Yes, thanks.” Jon reached over the glass display case to capture the container of scallops and the bag of mussels .

“Seriously though,” Robb began as they headed to the checkout, “what are you planning on doing with five pounds of deli meat? Did you even buy any bread?”

They met Talisa at the end of the drink aisle, pushing a cart full of water, both carbonated and still.

“Ok, do we need anything else?” 

As Jon was realizing that they needed some kind of starch in which to wrap the food he’d just ordered, he drew his gaze around the high end grocery store in search of an aisle labeled _bread._

Twisting his head as far to the left he could, he saw nothing that way. His head was slowly moving right as he passed over, and then doubled back to, a very familiar pair of blue eyes.

It couldn’t be _her._ What would _she_ be doing _here?_

On impulse, he raised his hand in an awkward wave.

She bit her lip and looked side to side before slowly responding in kind.

What should he do? Go over? Say hi? Wave her here? Apologize for cheating on her?

Ok, no, that last one was definitely not a good idea.

His decision was made for him as she cautiously approached. He was pretty sure he heard his brother asking who he was waiving to, but the words sounded far away, as if he was under water.

“Hello.” She said.

She looked different. Good, _really good_ actually, but different. Her long hair had been chopped and she clearly put more effort into her appearance these days. She looked… _polished_.

Her face had aged, but not in a bad way. She looked grown up, confident. She was wearing a light and loose summer dress that pulled in at her waist. It was completely unlike anything he’d seen her wear, but it suited her. 

“Hi.” He wasn’t sure if it was appropriate to hug her.

He assessed that she didn’t know what to say either, until she did.

“Heading to Chatham for Labor Day?” Of course she remembered.

Shaking the ghosts of the past from his mind, he nodded in affirmation. “We are. Just had to make a quick stop.” He caught himself before pointing to Audrey and feigning irritation at her.

“I’m sorry, I think my brother has forgotten his manners.” Robb said from behind him, reaching the hand that wasn’t cradling his niece, “I’m Robb, Jon’s—“

“Brother.” Ygritte met Robb’s gaze, “you’re Robb, Jon’s brother.”

“Yes,” his face was quizzical, probably finally connecting the dots. “This is my wife Talisa.”

Talisa, still uncertain of the situation, simply said, “It’s nice to meet you…”

“Ygritte, my name is Ygritte.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Ygritte.” To her credit, his sister in law gave no reaction, no indication that she knew exactly who this redhead was. He was more than confident she and Dany had spoken at length of Ygritte.

“You as well.” She smiled politely.

“What brings you to this neck of the woods?” Jon fumbled the question, awkward.

“I’m going to Nantucket for the weekend with some friends.” She cleared her throat, “my old boss from my first job in Senator Lincoln’s office wasn’t using his place and offered it to me.”

“You’re working for a Senator? Ygritte that’s amazing.” He was genuinely proud of her, happy for her. All she talked about in college was politics. Unlike himself, who’d had no exact trajectory yet somehow found himself mildly successful, she was doing what she dreamt.

The smile that crossed her face seemed authentic. “It’s a lot of late hours and little pay, but it’s great work. Senator Lincoln really cares about his constituents and it’s, well, it’s inspiring.”

She looked happy. 

Audrey suddenly began to squirm in Robb’s embrace, a faint but happy whine escaping her lungs as she turned her head and began grabbing at the air.

Jon’s eyes followed the direction of his daughter’s arms.

Fuck.

Fucking fucking fuck.

He pressed his lids together with dread for a brief moment. 

The little girl started babbling, “muh-muh, muh-muh, muh-muh.”

“There’s my happy girl!” Dany reached out for Audrey, completely oblivious to the reunion she was interrupting, pulling the girl from her uncle’s arms and draping happy kisses across her cheeks, nose, and forehead eliciting giggles as she grabbed at her mother’s hair.

By the time Dany’s focus shifted from solely her daughter, the full shock of the moment had set in. Her only action to say, “oh!”

“Hello Daenerys.”

“Ygritte, it’s good to see you.” Dany instinctively pulled Audrey closer to her and away from the redhead.

“This is your daughter?”

“This is Audrey Stark,” Dany whispered into the crown of the baby’s head before picking up her arm gently and waving it in Ygritte’s direction, “can you say hi to daddy’s friend, Audrey?”

Jon noticed the smug smile on Dany’s lips as she said this. She was rubbing their daughter in his ex-girlfriend’s face, something he did not appreciate.

“She’s beautiful, she’s got your curls, Jon.” Ygritte was trying to be polite and he felt a sting of empathy gnawing in his stomach. She covered it well, but he could see that Dany’s remarks achieved their intended _sting._ “Congratulations, to both of you.”

“She’ll have a little brother or sister in January, too.” Dany dangled that out intentionally, her motive transparent.

It was with great effort that Jon contained his irritation and anger. 

“It was nice to bump into you, hope you have a nice long weekend.”

Jon was silent as they were waiting in line. He was _seething_. When he saw Ygritte walk past their aisle, he didn’t even think before handing his card to Robb and saying he'd meet them at the car.

When he exited the store he had to shield his eyes from the sun with his hand, he should’ve taken the sunglasses into the store with him, why didn’t he? He quickly scanned the busy parking lot and found his target. He lunged into a slow jog to catch up with her.

“Ygritte!” he called, then again “Ygritte!” She stopped, but didn’t turn.

He caught up with her.

“Ygritte.” He stood in front of her and she looked at him, expectant. “I’m sorry.”

She looked impatient, rattled. “About what?”

“About what happened in there,” he pointed to the store, “about what happened in London, about what happened in college in general, I guess.”

____________________________________________________________________________

Dany was somehow both surprised and not at all surprised at Jon’s reaction. This was exactly how he acted all throughout college; chasing after Ygritte to assuage her feelings, leaving little consideration for Dany.

Only now they had Audrey and were expecting another baby. This time one they’d _planned_ for.

By the time he finished whatever it was he’d run off to do—she knew exactly where he had gone, or more specifically to whom—the car was packed up and on with the AC at full blast.

The only interaction she had with him being the glare he sent her way as he opened the driver’s side door, which she turned away from, stone faced.

She knew he was upset with her, hell Robb and Talisa knew he was upset with her. The tension between them had been mounting all day, after the events of last night.

Pyp and Sansa had come down from the city and the plan had been for them to grab dinner and stay over at Jon and Dany’s house. At the end of dinner, however, Pyp said something about Dany being supportive of their relationship from the first, and Jon was taken aback by it.

Dany explained she felt terrible keeping it from him, but she’d sworn secrecy to Sansa. Of course, this brought up the anger at Pyp from earlier in the summer and he was in such a sour mood that Sansa and Pyp elected to drive back to Boston that night.

When they got home and had put Audrey to bed, he was giving her a bit of a cold shoulder. Normally, she’d allow him time to process whatever was going on in his head, with just a roll of her eyes. She couldn’t stop herself from observing, out loud, that he was acting like their two year old daughter.

Needless to say, _that_ didn’t help the situation.

He hadn’t been _as much_ of an asshole this morning, but she knew he was irritated that they could only spend one day in the Cape this year; needing to leave for Grey and Missy’s wedding in Rhode Island the next day so they could make it in time for the rehearsal. This was one of his favorite family weekends and he wanted to spend as much time with his family as possible.

Most of the bridal party was already going down to the hotels on Friday, but Dany had compromised that she’d go to the Cape on Friday instead.

The remainder of the car ride was mostly silent. _At least my new car has a big backseat,_ she thought. When they lived in the city, they’d shared Jon’s car; as it was that remained parked on the street most days. However, moving out to the suburbs forced them to realize how impractical it was to share a car. They also were going to need more room for a second child. Early in July, they made their way to a dealership and walked out a few hours later with a nice, midsize SUV.

She realized she was being unnecessarily petty at the store, something uncharacteristic of her. But the way Jon was looking at Ygritte hit a nerve. There was something long buried that easily bubbled to the surface and it was not pleasant.

Audrey had fallen asleep in the short time it took to finish the drive so they let her nap a little longer as they unloaded the car and brought their luggage into the house. The plan for the next day being Jon and Dany would get up, get their things together, and head straight for Rhode Island, leaving Audrey under the care of the family for the two nights they’d be at the wedding. Sunday, Robb and Talisa ride with Arya to Jon and Dany’s, where they’d parked their car.

Finally, as Jon shut off the car and made sure all the windows were closed, Dany picked up her sleeping toddler with care and walked her to the room she and Jon shared, a crib left over from Jon’s own childhood set up and ready. As she was gently placed on the waiting mattress, Audrey stirred but did not wake; Dany’s silent prayers having been answered.

As she moved to the kitchen to help with the groceries, she noticed Jon, Robb, and Arya standing on the back porch, each already with a drink in hand.

“Guess they’re starting early, huh?” 

“Clearly trying to make the most of the time they’ve got this weekend while we pregnant women stand barefoot in the kitchen.” Despite her mood, Dany had to laugh at that as they both stood barefoot, pregnant, and unloading groceries.

“I’m famished and the only thing in the world I want right now is a peanut butter sandwich.”

“That actually sounds delicious.” Talisa handed her the bread as she searched for the peanut butter. “You wanna talk about what happened back there?”

“Honestly, no. But watch, he’s going to avoid me for the rest of the day.”

“That’s…healthy.”

“He can overreact, and he has gotten better over time, but sometimes I feel like I’m living with a teenager. Usually, if I call him on it, he backs down and acknowledges what he’s doing. But that obviously won’t work when I’m the one he’s upset at.”

“What happens in those situations?”

“We don’t usually get upset with each other.”

“You don’t argue?”

“I mean, we get annoyed with each other sure. But the yelling, screaming at each other thing? Never.”

“Robb and I fight, but we rarely scream at each other. I think it’s healthy to express yourself and let a disagreement happen. I don’t know how our relationship would’ve grown if we hadn’t? I mean, when he told me he was moving back to the states without even consulting me first? Yes, we didn’t talk for two days, but that was after we fought. There was yelling then. But after that, we were able to talk it out.”

“I don’t like yelling. Was around too much of it growing up and I _definitely_ don’t want to expose Audrey, or any other future children, to that.”

“There’s a difference between a healthy fight and a dysfunctional one. I think you guys should at least address your feelings with each other.”

Dany bit into her sandwich and leaned against the counter, crossing one arm across her chest and looking through the closed french doors to the siblings.

A nervous feeling in her stomach, Dany finished her sandwich and forced herself through the door and onto the deck.

“Dany! I was wondering where you were! You look great!” Arya greeted her with a friendly smile and a hug, “Can’t believe we’ll have two new baby Starks soon!”

“Thanks, Arya.” After a moment, “Do you guys mind giving me and Jon a minute out here?” She asked of her and Robb.

They all exchanged an awkward glance, Arya likely more confused than her eldest brother. 

“We actually should start getting the food ready and check in on Sansa and Pyp.” Robb made his way to the door and nodded his head in the same direction, instructing Arya to follow.

Once they were alone, Dany stepped closer to Jon. “You planning on giving me the cold shoulder all day?”

“What do you want me to say?”

“Anything. I want you to _literally_ say anything.”

“I don’t want to do this now.” Jon leaned against the railing and put a hand through his hair.

“You’re upset with me. I get that. But did it occur to you that I’m also upset with you?”

“How could it?” He placed his drink on the bannister. “Now you’re annoyed at me for avoiding you? In case you missed it, any time I’ve tried to talk about something difficult with you, you’ve frozen up and walked away. So tell me, Dany, what’s the point of trying to tell you why I’m upset when it will fall on deaf ears?”

“Well, I’m here now.”

“God, you can be so infuriating sometimes.” Jon stood, walked a few paces, then back, and turned to her. “Where do you want me to start? How you lied to me about Sansa and Pyp, for what, a year? Or the childish way you acted in the store today?”

“Really? _Really? I’m_ the childish one? We’re just going to ignore your little temper tantrum from last night? What about the fact that you were looking at Ygritte as if you’d been shown a future you wished you’d had?”

“Is that a joke? Seriously, is that a fucking joke?” He stepped toward her, then back. “How many times do I need to reassure you on that insecurity? God dammit. I felt like shit seeing her and rubbing our relationship in her face. Maybe if you had an ounce of compassion, you’d see that.”

Her anger fueled by adrenaline, she felt like her bones were shaking her skin. “Oh _I’m_ the one who lacks compassion? How about the fact that you pay more attention to a stranger on the streets’ feelings than you do to mine?”

“When have I _ever_ done that? Literally everything I do is for you and Audrey.”

“Don’t do that, _don’t fucking do that_.” She hadn’t realized she was yelling until she caught the five pairs of eyes watching through the doors. “How about from the beginning? When it was easier to hurt my feelings than Ygritte’s? How about the first time I met your family and you said nothing? How about after Theon’s bachelor party? Or that you kept Ygritte’s bag, _after_ I found it and told you I was uncomfortable with it.”

“ _You_ didn’t want to be with _me_. I asked you, multiple times! I told you I loved you and you just walked away. Then you fucking invited Drogo to your graduation. And _you’re_ the one who disappeared for five fucking days after Theon’s bachelor party!”

She was crossing and uncrossing her arms, fidgeting in place despite her body’s desire to move and expel energy, she would stand her ground. “I didn’t know which end was up at graduation; in case you forgot, my father was dead and my mother basically disowned me. But yes, sorry for not taking _your_ feelings into consideration. _And_ when you came back after Theon’s, I was trying to process the fact that I was pregnant and wanted nothing more than to talk to you, but all you wanted to do was sit there and hate yourself for things that’d happened five years before.”

“How was I supposed to know, I can’t see inside your fucking head!”

“You also couldn’t see what was right in front of you. Maybe if you stopped torturing yourself for five minutes you’d have seen it. And you _still_ haven’t said anything about Ygritte’s bag.”

“Jesus, if it bothers you so much, why didn’t you just throw it away? Huh?”

“Seriously? I mean, seriously Jon? What am I supposed to do with that? You want me to throw that away for you? You need to _let go_ of the past, I can’t fucking do that for you.”

He turned and looked away from her, to the water in the distance and then came back around, at a loss for words, apparently.

“You have no problem holding onto her bag. I bet, in a different world you’d have asked _her_ to marry you by now.” In her frustration, she let slip the one thing that had been eating away at her.

“ _You told me you didn’t want me to!_ That is not fucking fair. Any time I brought it up, you shut down the conversation before it could even begin.”

“You brought it up _once_ , when we had just learned I was pregnant, and I told you not to do it _because_ of Audrey.”

“That is _not_ how it happened. And if it bothered you so much, why didn't you ever say anything?” He was pacing again.

“Oh, I’m supposed to ask my boyfriend to ask me to marry him? My boyfriend who still spirals into self pity and shame any time even the _idea_ of his college girlfriend is brought up? Yeah, that sounds _ideal_.”

“Why can’t you let this go? Are you that insecure of Ygritte?”

“ _You’re_ the one who can’t let it go! God you’re fucking gas lighting me. You’re the one who didn’t talk to me for an hour after we saw her. You’re the one who yelled at _me_ , your _pregnant_ girlfriend, for not being nice enough to the woman I was _second best_ to for four years!”

“Hey, guys—“ Sansa interrupted from the other side of the door, which she’d opened just enough to peek her head through.

“Not now!” They yelled in unison. 

Dany waived her hand in Sansa’s direction, “even Sansa is over it. Your sister who hated me for years can move past it, forgive me, but you can’t.”

“That _is not_ it!”

“Then what is it?!”

He sighed, exasperated. “I didn’t just break her heart. I ripped my family away from her. You don’t get it, but she was a part of the family. We stole that from her.”

_Well, that stung._

She felt tears in her eyes. She was not going to cry right now. Or, at least, she wasn't going to cry in front of him right now.

“Know what? You’re right, I don’t get what it’s like to be a part of your family.”

If she weren’t so hurt and angry, she probably would’ve noticed the way his face softened as he said, “Dany, I—“ But she was hurt and angry, and she waved her hand to silence him as she turned and brushed past Sansa on her way into the house.

____________________________________________________________________________

Jon covered his eyes with his hands and took a few deep breaths, trying to calm himself. How had the argument escalated like that? Despite his anger and irritation, he did feel horrible for what he’d said. Of course he didn’t mean it the way it came out, but he knew how Dany had taken it.

Finally calm enough to apologize, he walked into the house in search of Dany. What he found, he was not expecting. 

All of her things, all of Audrey’s things, had been removed from their bedroom. He pushed the curtain aside and saw Dany loading the car.

_What the fuck_.

He raced to the kitchen, panicked. As he was about to open the door to the driveway, he noticed Talisa holding his daughter. His daughter who appeared marvelously oblivious to the events surrounding her. He pulled her from her aunt’s arms and kissed the top of her head.

“Jon, Dany’s leaving and she planning on bringing Audrey with her. No one’s been able to talk her out of it.”

As if on cue, Dany walked back into the house.

“Planning on telling me you’re taking her or were you just going to let me find the bed empty?”

“You’re saying goodbye now.” Her usual stoic tone had returned, but he could see that her eyes were puffy and she had a little sniffle.

“Dany, you can’t do this.”

“I’m taking _my_ family and going _home_.”

“Dany…”

“Say goodbye to daddy, sweetheart.”

Still clueless to her surroundings, Audrey mumbled a quick “buh-bye” and was pulled from his arms.

After a moment frozen in place, Jon’s feet caught up with his racing thoughts and carried him after them. When he made it outside, Dany was closing the backseat door. He caught her arm, “Dany, please don’t go. Don’t do this.”

She pulled her way as if she’d been scolded, “ _Do not_ touch me!” He relented and stepped back.

“So you’re just going to run away then? What is your plan for tomorrow? How am I supposed to get home? Get to the wedding?”

“I don’t know and right now I don’t care.”

She got in the car and drove away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here's what we've been building to for the last 17 chapters.
> 
> I started working on this one weeks ago, knowing how much there was riding on it.
> 
> I'm giving co-credit to InBoccaAlLupo on this because without her gracious willingness to become my unofficial editor, there would be far more typos and plot holes.
> 
> Biggest of thanks to all of you reading and commenting. Hoping this one does not disappoint!


	19. Goodbye Stranger

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's song is: Goodbye Stranger, by Supertramp:  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=387_Ysc8imU

Jon slowly blinked his eyes open, confused for the briefest of seconds, before recognizing the song set as Dany’s alarm. He wanted to roll to the nightstand to silence the offending noise, but Dany was spooned closely to him, still asleep, his naked body deliciously close to hers, arm draped deceivingly tight around her.

As considered moving again, she nuzzled closer to him, presumably only half awake.

“I cannot tell you how much I hate that song,” he spoke the first words of the day.

“Because it means we have to get up?” She whispered back her question, now attempting to detangle herself from his embrace.

“I guess that’s my newest reason for hating it, yes. But no, it’s just not a good song.”

“If you let me go, I can ease you of your misery.”

“Nooo,” groaning as he stretched the arm not pinning her to him and arched his back, “if you turn off the alarm then we have to get out of bed.”

“Some of us have class this morning.”

“That’s not some of us’s problem.”

“Us’s?” She turned to face him and arched a brow. “Our?”

“Oh, no, _our_ problem is that you’re probably going to miss your class cause you’re in bed with me. And then you’re gonna be mad at me and yada yada yada, you’re not going to share your chicken curry with me tonight.”

She bit at her smile, bashful, “oh, is that so?”

“Oh yeah. It’s gonna be a whole thing.” He drew out the ‘o’ in whole.

She ran a hand along his side, up to his shoulder, then back down the arm that now rested on her waist, reaching for his palm and twining her fingers with his.

They stared at each other, smiling, before he traced his head across the pillow, his face just centimeters from hers. Just a scooch more and he was able to lightly press his nose to hers in an eskimo kiss.

“Your breath is pretty gross.”

“You always know how to charm a guy.” He tried to pull his hand free, “you’re one to talk, Targaryen. Besides, you love it.” He went in for a kiss, which she returned.

After a moment or two, his body relaxed and she made her move, agile. She let go his hand, pushed him away, and rolled to finally shut off the music. As she was about to make a run for it, he caught her from behind and pulled her backward on to the bed.

“Nooo!” She yelled between laughs.

He threw her over his body, landing her on her back, him almost immediately on top of her, pulling the blankets like a tent over them.

“Oh, you’re gonna pay for that.” His hands were suddenly upon her, tickling under her arms and along her stomach.

“Ah! No! Stop!” She breathed out as her body convulsed with giggles.

Dany had excused herself in time for her second class, leaving Jon in her bed. He took his time getting up, wanting savor the last few mornings they had together in London. He hadn’t expected to find himself feeling this way for her, at least not after he started dating Ygritte. _Maybe before_ …but that was something he didn’t like to think about. 

The way Dany scrunched up her nose when she disagreed with him, the way she laughed, when she _truly_ laughed, not just that fake one she gave most people. He’d come close to telling her all of this a few weeks ago. But then Drogo was here and joking and funny and even though he was in her bed the day before and the day after he’d visited, Jon felt like a filler, like second best.

Even now, sitting up and noticing the picture slideshow that was Dany’s screensaver, Drogo’s face popped up every few slides; making a silly face and sticking out his tongue, or with Dany on his lap, _really_ laughing. 

In a few weeks they’d both be home. Dany would be with Drogo like she wanted and he’d…he’d be with Ygritte. 

____________________________________________________________________________

Dany was able to make it to her second class of the day, just barely. By the time she’d made it back to the flat, through the rain, she was freezing; the jacket she’d brought neither warm nor waterproof enough.

“Well you look like a wet dog,” Pyp smirked over his shoulder from the couch as she stripped the useless jacket from her body and hung it on the coat rack next to the radiator.

Holding her hair over her shoulder and twisting it, she stood over Pyp a she wrung it out, a decent amount of water pouring onto his head.

“Hey now! Uncalled for!” Dany chulcked at him and shrugged in feigned innocence. “You ought to be careful princess, your prince isn’t here to defend you right now.” Dany gave him the finger as she walked to her bedroom.

Peeling off wet layers in search of warmth on her chilled skin, she caught sight of her rumpled bed, the memories it held bringing a smile to her face. Shaking the thoughts from mind, she slipped on her favorite oversized sweater and a pair of leggings. Tucking her feet into her slippers, she shuffled to the kitchen to make tea, her damp hair down to dry.

“Pyp, can I offer you a truce in the form of tea?”

“Her highness is gonna wait on me?” He put his hand to his heart, dramatic.

“Yes or no Pyp?” She called as she strained on her toes to reach the box of teabags.

“Yes please!”

Puttering around in the kitchen, she hadn’t heard Jon’s entrance, or his stalking her, until his arms had wrapped around her, pulling her right side into a rough hug. He swayed them side to side and then pulled back. 

She felt oddly cold at the lost of his arms around her, she put a hand on her wet upper arm, “God dammit, Jon! I just changed!” She wanted to be annoyed, but he had that stupid grin on his face; the one that made her either want run to him or away from him, she hadn’t decided yet.

“Pyp put me up to it!” He ducked and covered as she threw the box of tea at him. “Yes, I’d love some tea, Dany.” He teased, handing it back to her and disappeared, just as the kettle was boiling.

She balanced two very full cups across the dingy carpet of their flat, whistling for Pyp’s attention, as she extended her right hand, “careful, it’s hot!”

“Where’s mine?”

“Oh, _pumpkin_ , I’d already put the water on.” She snapped her fingers in mock disappointment.

“Guess it’s your turn to get the take away tonight then.”

“Hey! That’s not fair! You already said you would!”

“That was before I suffered this egregious offense, and I have a paper to write.”

“Oh, I see how it is. Send the girl with the busted jacket out in the rain to bring your food back.”

“Sounds about right to me.” His smile was sheepish.

“Guys, you know what? Don’t even pay attention to me. I don’t even want to hear what’s happening on my show. I mean it, just keep talking as if I’m not here.”

“You really need to hear the narration on the antelope documentary?” Dany asked, skeptical.

“Maybe I do.”

Jon sat back, arms folded behind his head, “ah, Dany, Pyp is taking notes. Needs to learn how to trap his prey, otherwise he’s never gonna have that London fling he’s been bragging about for six months.”

“Well I’m gonna go talk to people who are nice to me,” Pyp said, matter-of-fact. “ _And_ I’m taking my tea with me.” At which, Jon and Dany exchanged an amused glance.

Pyp was easy to read, and were he actually annoyed his ears would’ve turned red. Dany knew their living arrangement was not ideal for Pyp, but he took it in stride. He took queue from Jon and Dany and never directly addressed _their_ situation. He was at least peripherally aware of what was happening, having seen Jon or Dany sneak out of the other’s room in the morning.

And there was that one time he walked in on them in the midst of some heavy petting, but in their defense, he was supposed to be at class. To his credit, he never so much as alluded to it. At least not to Dany.

At Pyp’s retreat, Jon moved to sit next to Dany, reaching his arms around her and pulling her back flush with his chest. “I’ll get the food.”

“No, no. I know you do have that paper. It’s fine. I’ll suck it up.”

“It’s just around the block, you can wear my jacket if you want.”

“I’ll look like a ragamuffin in your coat.”

Jon grasped her nose between his thumb and index finger, “but a cute ragamuffin.”

“Speaking of cute, I see you cut your hair today.”

“It was getting too long, I was starting to feel like an emo kid.”

She chuckled at that, “you looked cute.”

“Past tense?”

“Your hair looks sexy pushed back.”

“The only reason I know that reference is because you’ve made me watch that movie eight hundred times.” He rubbed a hand along her collarbone absentmindedly. 

“Oh shut up, you like it.”

“You really liked my hair longer?”

“There was something about it, I dunno maybe with the mix of beard and hair like that you looked dangerous, or mysterious.”

“Oh, I am super dangerous and _very_ mysterious.”

She coughed a laugh, “sure you are.”

“Need I remind you of your punishment for disobedience earlier today?”

Clearing her throat, she asked “What time do you want to eat?”

“Way to change the subject.” He gave her a condescending pat on the shoulder, “Wanna aim for sevenish?”

“That works. Do you know if Pyp is joining us tonight?”

“I think he made other plans.”

“He’s missing chicken curry Wednesday?! He started chicken curry Wednesday!”

“Save me some leftovers, guys!” His yell echoed through down the hall, amidst the numerous chimes of his instant messages. “Also, Jon, Robb says hi.”

“Shit, he’s online? Pyp why didn’t you tell me? We’ve been playing phone tag for weeks!” He pushed Dany up and gave a quick squeeze on her arm, before disappearing and reappearing a minute later, “seven?”

She met him with a closed lip smile and a quick nod.

“Ok.” He double tapped the wall before disappearing to his room.

Dany decided she may as well get _some_ work done.

Taking Jon up on his offer, she’d snagged his jacket to brave the rain. Even despite the cold bite and moisture, Dany couldn’t stop herself from pausing to take in the sights and sounds that were London. They had just a week and a half left before the term ended and they were bound for the states.

Part of her didn’t want to leave, wanted to stay in London, in this semester forever. She was happy here, she _liked_ herself here. 

The food was ready almost immediately and the flavors smelled intoxicating. Dany was going to miss this place. On the walk back, she thought of telling Jon just as much, of telling him how cute his smile was and how happy she was when it appeared as a result of her. She wanted to tell him that sharing a bed usually made her uncomfortable but she’d never felt more relaxed than in a twin bed with him. Being with him made some of the bad things hurt just a little less. She wanted to tell him _why_ she hurt.

Tonight, she thought, tonight is the night.

Briefly contemplating running to Jon and rubbing his wet jacket all over him as he had her just hours earlier, she decided against it and returned the jacket to its designated hook. Before she left, she’d knocked on his door and twirled, modeling the oversized parka. Now, she was going to push his door open and dangle the take out bag and then wordlessly walk away.

As she moved closer to his room though, she could hear he was speaking to someone. _Maybe he finally got ahold of his brother_ she thought. His voice was slightly muffled from his _mostly_ shut door, but she heard just enough to pique her interest.

“No, it’s not that. Of course I miss you—“

Silence and sighing on his end. She knew she should walk away, not invade his privacy, but she felt stuck in her spot.

“I do understand how hard this has been, I’m shit at figuring out the time change. I haven’t even talked to my brother in weeks!”

He sounded exasperated.

“Ygritte, that’s ridiculous…no I’ve never signed offline because I saw you’d signed on…I’m not mad at you…I’ve told you, the cellphone I got for over here only has limited minutes…because my parents are paying for it.”

She couldn’t see his face but she could tell by his tone, he was rubbing his eyes and pinching his nose, he always did that when he was annoyed.

“I’m not annoyed you called, I answered it, didn’t I?” He sighed, “Da—Ygritte, look I’ll see you after Christmas and we can talk this all out…no, I’m not being dismissive, it’s just dinner time here and I have to study and we’re talking in circles here…I know, but it’s barely a month now, and that’ll go by quick…ok…I, you too.”

Dany scooted back down the hall and began emptying the contents of the takeout bag. When Jon appeared at the table, wearing his purple Amherst sweatshirt, he looked older, more weighed down.

“Need help?”

“Um, I think all we need is the plates and forks from the kitchen if you wanna grab them?”

As he breezed behind her, she saw his hand move to squeeze her arm and then freeze mid-air and pull back. He cleared his throat, “what are we drinking tonight?”

“You’re not going to force me to drink beer?”

“Do you want me to force you to drink beer?”

Dany tried to be playful, “no, but there’s other things I’d like you to force me to do.”

His reply was a sad smile and a brief nod, “if the princess can recommend a wine that’s palatable with Indian, I’ll suffer through that.”

“I think, technically, a lot of sweet wines pair well with Indian, but I’m not a big fan of sweet wines. Is there a sparkling rosé in the fridge? I think I bought one at that wine tasting we went to a few weeks ago?”

“Only you, as a twenty year old, would casually have a sparkling rosé just laying around in the fridge.” The fun Jon was slowly returning to her.

“Gotta earn my royal title somehow.” He handed her a plate and she spooned rice and chicken as he poured the wine.

“Someday, I’m gonna meet your parents. I’m gonna see this mansion where you were raised in South Carolina and I’m gonna take a picture holding the silver spoon you were born with.”

 _If only you knew,_ she thought. He was partly right, though. Her parents had never hurt for money.

“Oh you’re one to talk. How many houses do your parents own?”

“Honestly, Dany? It looks that way now, yes. But when I was a kid, like a _little_ kid, in the days before Sansa and Arya, we lived in this tiny apartment. My dad had just passed his CPA and was deciding to branch out on his own. He took all the money he had and put it into the business.” He paused for a bite of his food. “My parents spoiled us when they could, but made sure we weren’t brats about it.”

“You implying that I’m a brat?” She teased.

“No, oh no!” His fork dropped to his plate with a clink, “honestly I’m not gonna presume much about the things you don’t talk about. I think maybe I’m just defensive because, yes my parents have money and are comfortable in their lifestyle, but my dad worked his _ass_ to get there. They don’t want us to become ungrateful little dicks.”

He was speaking with his hands now, which was endearing, when he spoke with passion his cheeks and the tip of his nose flushed just a little bit.

“For example, my parents told us upfront, they’d pay for the equivalent of a four year degree in a state school in Massachusetts. If we wanted to go somewhere else, we would be responsible for the difference. My parents, my dad especially, want us to value the idea of _earning_ money, to never take anything for granted.”

“Your parents seem to have succeeded in raising some pretty well rounded kids.” Dany filled another glass of wine for herself.

“I don’t know, my dad is great, I have an amazing relationship with him, but I just feel like he missed out on a lot of stuff for the girls that he was around for with me and Robb. He didn’t have time to coach their soccer teams.”

“There’s no perfect family, Jon. It sounds like your parents love you, I think that’s the most any of us can ask for.”

“No, I know. I’m not saying my dad was absentee or anything like that, he was around, he is around, I just…I don’t know what I’m saying. This booze you’re giving me is going to my head.” He raised the glass to the light, inspecting it.

“My fam—“ Before the words could leave her mouth, Audioslave was suddenly blasting from Jon’s pocket.

“Hang on.” He pulled out his phone and glanced at the front display, rolling his eyes.

“If you need to get that, it’s totally cool. I can put the dishes away.”

He looked hesitant, uncertain, before he hit the button on the side to silence the call. “Got any of that vodka you’re so fond of?”

“Wanna talk about it?”

“Not really.” His eyes told her to back off. She knew better, in all honesty. This was the unspoken agreement that came with their… _relationship_.

“Jon, I,” she exhaled, building her nerves, “should we talk about next semester?”

His chair ran across the linoleum floor, the only uncarpeted area in the whole apartment, with a loud screech, “you done?” He piled his plate on hers and dropped them in the sink before opening the cupboard where they kept the alcohol. He brought two highball glasses and soda water back to the table.

“Jon?”  
“Look, there’s nothing to talk about. You’ll be back with Drogo and I’ll be back with Ygritte and this will be a distant memory.”

“Is that what you want?”

He swirled the drink in his hand, studying the bubbles without looking at her face. He tossed the drink back and held his empty glass to her, indicating she do the same.

That night, as she lay curled close to him, skin touching skin, she wondered if there’d ever been a time in her life where he wasn’t a part of her. At one point he whispered that what he wanted didn’t matter, whether it was in her head or in her ear, she wasn’t sure.

He and Pyp flew home was the day before she. They woke that morning, she hugged and kissed him goodbye, she didn’t cry until after the door was shut behind them.

It was as she was doing her final run-through to make sure nothing was left behind that she saw the post-it on the cabinet in the kitchen. It said “open me!”

Curious, she did as instructed and was greeted with a box that took up the entire bottom shelf. She remarked to herself how light it was for something of its size and placed it on the floor in front of her. Removing the lid, she saw the unmistakeable logo. It was a down jacket.  
At the bottom of the box, almost camouflaged amidst the tissue paper was a card.

_“Throw the old one away._  
Stay warm, Dany.  
-Jon” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this is a first.
> 
> I’m drafting my notes before I post this chapter.
> 
> So…first and foremost: THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!!!
> 
> Ok, I have to say, I’m sorry for not replying to all of your AMAZING comments on the last chapter. For a quiet little writer who expected my story to just kinda hang on and get a few views, that blew me out of the water. The fact that there are some heavily passionate opinions on BOTH sides makes me feel like I at least did *something* right. 
> 
> A few people have said this kinda feels this story puts Ygritte up on a pedestal—that is not the intent. My goal in this whole endeavor is to create characters that *feel* real. Ygritte has always been driven. That’s addressed in the graduation chapter. If she hadn’t found out about Jon and Dany when she was still in college, what would’ve happened between her and Jon when she got offered a job in DC and wasn’t gonna move to Boston? Her chapter was to show that she’s not just collateral damage.
> 
> Ygritte is not living a better life than Jon and Dany, she's living a _different_ life. She's successful in her career because that's her main focus. Jon and Dany work hard, but they leave work at work; they're more of the "work to live vs. live to work."
> 
> Did Jon love Ygritte? Yes, of course. Was he in love with her? I’ll leave that to the reader’s interpretation.
> 
> A lot of you have mentioned what Jon and Dany should and could have done differently—this is absolutely awesome, I love that you’re thinking about these things—it genuinely makes my heart warm! I think that’s the exact benefit of hindsight, if Jon and Dany could see the future, of course they’d make the right decisions! (a lot of you have pointed out the right decisions far better than i could’ve thought!)
> 
> If you have any other questions, please feel free to drop me a line on tumblr, I’m not super savvy on there, but it is easier for me to keep track of and i’m happy to engage one-on-one. Same username: Razbrylimedragons
> 
> I KNOW you want the second part of the fight and i know you probably hate me for putting the London chapter in between. The funny part? The London chapter always followed chapter 18. Butttt chapter 18 suddenly became 26 pages and that was too much for one chapter, so i asked my phenomenal editor/beta/fellow aquarian/ former cube mate/ travel buddy (#greece2019) to tell me where it made sense to split, and low and behold, she said the exact same place i was thinking. 
> 
> I promise, the times when it seems like a flashback chapter is thrown in haphazardly, there’s actually a reason.
> 
> At the end of this, I have good and better news for you. Good: now we get 22 chapters (this is the last extension, I swear). Better: Ch. 20 is written and just needs one last round of copy editing (who AM I? i EDIT now?) and WILL be posted on Sunday 1/21.


	20. It's Now or Never

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's song is: It's Now or Never, by Elvis Presley  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QkMVscR5YOo

Jon walked back into the house, through the kitchen, to the back deck, opened the cooler and pulled out a beer. Once the lid was closed again, he turned and sat on top of it, taking a long sip before banging his head against the shingles. He didn’t understand how this had happened. Things were _fine_. They were _fine_. They were _happy_.

“How you holding up, champ?” Jon was so lost in thought he hadn’t heard Robb open the door and step onto the porch.

“Everyone heard all of that, didn’t they?” Jon stood and sat on the ground to allow Robb access to the cooler. His brother got two beers out and sat next to him.

“I could be nice and tell you we didn’t, but buddy the entire neighborhood probably heard all that.” As Jon took a final sip of his beer, his brother leaned back and tapped a full can against his chest. “This all started from bumping into Ygritte earlier today? Think maybe you overreacted?”

“Dany _was_ a bitch to her,” was Jon’s only defense as he cracked the fresh can and brought it to his mouth.

“I mean, she wasn’t the nicest she could’ve been, for sure.”

“There’s a _but_ there.”

“Well, I don’t know Ygritte, but the way everyone used to talk about her, honestly it was kinda annoying. I was irritated hearing about it and I heard it as your brother.”

“What’s your point?”

“Dany didn’t have the smoothest introduction to the family. She put up with a lot, Jon. Mum’s not always been the easiest on her and we all know the shit she and Sansa had. But, she kept coming back for more, _for you_.”

“I can’t control mum and Sansa.” Jon felt defensive.

“No, but you could’ve pulled them aside, especially Sansa, and asked them to layoff.”

“They were disappointed in me, I can’t change that.”

Robb sighed, “bud, you’ve gotta let go of this Catholic guilt you’re clinging to. And, I mean, it kinda seems like you’re taking some of it out on Dany.”

‘We both were in the wrong.”

“Agree to disagree on that. Seems to me, while morally questionable, her actions didn’t negatively affect her relationships. You were the one in the wrong, there, Jon.”

“I mean, yes what I did was somehow more wrong that what she did, but she knew what she was doing.”

“Like I said, morally questionable. But I kinda feel like she’s paid her penance.” Robb opened the cooler and pulled out two more beers. “She feels like an outsider looking in.”

Jon accepted the drink, may as well get drunk at 3 pm, he thought. “That’s ridiculous. Obviously she’s part of the family.” He brought the drink to his lips and paused, turning to look at Robb. “Wait, did she say that?”

“Not to me.”

“Then to whom?”

“I know it’s something she and Talisa have discussed, at least a little.”

“Why the fuck couldn’t she tell me?”

“I think there are a few things the both of you have been trying very hard _not_ to say to each other.”

“That’s fucking stupid. I hope Talisa told her so.”

“Well…”

“What?”  
“Look at the family photos in the house.”

“What about them? If this is something about Ygritte being in any photos, I don’t want to hear it. She was a part of my life for years.”

“Hear me out, Mum hung mine and Talisa’s wedding photo, the Stark family photo from my wedding—which Dany wasn’t in— there’s a picture of you holding Audrey as an infant. Then there’s a picture from one of the cookouts I missed, but which Ygritte attended. There’s a picture from that New Years I ended up in the hospital. There’s a picture of Ygritte and Sansa drinking those Moet sipper things…”

“I still don’t see your point.”

“God you’re dense sometimes. There is not a single photo of Dany, Jon. You were with Ygritte for what, three years and change? You’ve been with Dany, at least in this capacity, for something like five years? How would that make you feel?”

Jon’s head fell back against the house again. He hadn’t made that connection. As he thought through the years of their relationship, it was suddenly easy to think of all the things she’d endured without batting an eye. She never really told him that any of it had bothered her and he hadn’t taken the time to question whether it had or not.

Robb interrupted his thoughts. “Honestly, I can’t imagine what that must’ve felt like for her, in the grocery store. She’s had your kid, she’s _having_ your kid, and you’re standing there looking all starry eyed at Ygritte.”

“I was not starry eyed.”

“The look on your face indicated otherwise, brother. Talisa saw it, I saw it, _Dany saw it_.”

Talisa, Sansa, and Pyp chose that moment to join them on the deck, carrying a tray of cheese and crackers.

“You guys heard the whole thing, I assume?” Jon asked as he grabbed a few slices of cheese and a handful of Triscuts. The three exchanged glances, not knowing how to respond. 

“We heard.” Sansa finally confirmed, as they slid the deck chairs and a small table over to Robb and Jon, forming a small circle.

“I also assume you’re all going to agree that I’m the one who fucked up here?”

_Silence_

“Talisa?”

“Yes?”

“What’d you see at the grocery store?”

Her eyes shifted from Robb to Jon, uncomfortably. 

Jon opened the cooler again, pulling out beers for everyone and handing a can of seltzer to his sister in law, “g’wan lay it on me.”

“I guess it wasn’t exactly what you said to her that felt weird, but the _way_ you looked at her. You had this adoring and, I don’t know, wistful maybe, look in your eyes. It was kinda jarring.”

“You’re telling me I fucked up?”

“Jon, I don’t mean to be random, but.” Sansa was speaking now, “if things were so bad and got so weird after this interaction today, how was it after you told Dany when you texted Ygritte about dad dying?”

Jon was momentarily unsure if the alcohol was getting to him or if Sansa was speaking nonsense. “What? I mean…what?”

Sansa looked down at the drink in her hands, unsure. “You told Ygritte about dad?”

“I didn’t, though.”

“She emailed me a couple days after, to let me know she’d heard and was sorry.”

_What_.

“That was Dany.”

Jon’s head whipped in Talisa’s direction. “I’m sorry, come again?”

“Dany knew how close your dad and Sansa were, and how their relationship was built on similar interests, so she sent a message to Ygritte when he passed, in hopes that she’d reach out to Sansa.”

Sansa’s gasp was audible, “what?! I was so awful to her back then!”

“Why’d she tell you but not me?” Jon asked Talisa.

“She felt guilty afterward. She felt like she’d gone behind your back. She was _so_ relieved when Ygritte didn’t come to the funeral.”

“Fuck.” 

Although Dany had never expressly said it, he knew she had abandonment issues thanks to her fucked up home and it was now occurring to him just exactly how deeply his unintended comment had cut. Frustrated, he picked up an empty can and threw it at the bannister, hearing it crash against the wood and then clank down the steps.

“God fucking dammit.” He rested his elbows on his knees and leaned forward, scratching at his scalp in frustration. When he looked up, he found four sets of eyes on him. “She didn’t, by any chance, also tell you about her family?”

Talisa looked uncomfortable again. “All I know is that her dad passed away and she doesn’t speak with her mom?”

“Her mother’s a fucking cunt.”

“Care to elaborate?” Pyp, who’d been silent until that moment, asked.

“Dany’s mother was raped.”

“I don’t know that qualifies her as a cunt?” Robb questioned.

“Her parents were married at the time and trying, unsuccessfully, to conceive.”

It was Sansa’s gasp he heard first, turning just in time to see her cover her mouth with her hand. But it was Talisa who asked, “You mean….?”

“She was the product of a sexual assault. She spent her entire fucking life knowing she was not wanted. Her dad loved her, but he died and after that her mother couldn’t hide her disdain and sent her off to college with a car, ten thousand dollars, and the request she never return.”

“Jesus, Jon. No wonder you never talk about her family. That is so fucked up.” Robb shook his head. 

“She used to cut herself. Especially after drinking. I realized it when we were in London, and well…you know that story.” Jon paused, sipping. “I asked her about it one time when we were…together. She said that sometimes the only way to alleviate her emotional pain was through physical pain, by physically _seeing_ and _feeling_ pain. At the time I didn’t know the reason for it.”

“Should we be worried?” It was Talisa asking now.

“Not for something like that, no. She hasn’t done that since I knew her in college.”

“I feel awful Jon, I’m sorry but I told her to come out and talk to you. She said you guys never fight and I thought that was…different.”

“It’s not your fault. She’s always so even keeled and patient, I think sometimes I take that for granted. I’ve never even heard her yell until today.”

Pyp blew out a whistle, “And you’ve known her for…”

“All tolled? Twelve years.”

“Come to think of it, whenever you got under her skin in London, she’d just leave the room.” Pyp laughed at himself, “I mean, that is before you got _under her skin_ if you know what I mean.”

“Christ, Pyp, yes everyone knows what you mean.” Sansa rolled her eyes.

“Read the room, buddy.” Robb said into his can.

“What do you mean, Pyp?” Jon looked to his oldest friend.

“I’d think you familiar with the workings of the deed by now…”

Jon rolled his eyes, “Pyp, c’mon.”

“Dude, when we first got there you alternated between super broody and just staring at her with heart eyes. I didn’t even know about your thing from freshman year at that point and I _still_ knew you guys were gonna bang. Everyone did.”

____________________________________________________________________________

Dany’s trip back home seemed to pass far more quickly than the drive down, Audrey thankfully sleeping most of it. Deciding to deal with the bags later, she brought her daughter right into the house, heated up some finger food, strapped her into her booster seat, and snuck a few bites herself.

She wasn’t hungry, but knew she should eat, unable to remember anything she’d eaten that day besides a peanut butter sandwich.

Honestly, the only thing she wanted was a cold glass of wine; something she could not have.

As Audrey ate, Dany pulled up the babysitting app she and Jon had discovered shortly after the move. Luck being on her side for once that day, Dany was able to schedule two nights with a woman who’d sat for Audrey a few times in the past.

She texted Jon to let him know she’d arranged the child care situation for the time she’d be at the wedding; regardless of her tangled emotions on their fight earlier, she knew he’d be worried. She also promptly muted any further notifications from him.

She distracted herself by playing with Audrey for a bit, giving her a bath, reading her favorite story, and getting her settled into bed.

She unpacked and then repacked the car, leaving only the items she’d need for her two nights at Missy’s wedding. Finding herself still not tired, she made a cup of tea and brought it onto her own back porch.

Though they hadn’t done much since moving in, not that the house _needed_ much, the table and chairs they’d put out immediately became her favorite spot. Due to the house’s close proximity to the water, even on a warm summer night, they frequently caught a breeze that brought the perfect bite of chill. She couldn’t wait to sit out here on a fall day, wrapped in a blanket with either a cup of coffee or glass of wine, depending on the time of day.

She let herself slouch down in the chair and leaned her head back, eyes closed, as the gentle caress of the tide brushing against the boats below played like a lullaby.

She’d almost tricked herself into believing she was fine, but the baby moved and suddenly she was crying. She felt bad for the way she’d acted toward Ygritte and worse for some of the things she’d said to Jon.

He wasn’t forgiven yet, though.

In her heart of hearts, she knew that he’d fumbled the words when he’d implied that Ygritte was more a part of his family than she was, but that lead to the bigger problem. He’d called her insecure for her actions and while she fully admitted her actions were a bit immature, she felt like he was using her as scapegoat for his own feelings.

In college, it made sense that Jon would think of Ygritte’s feelings more. But today? After everything they’d built together? That she didn’t understand. Someone had once told her that people tended to be harder on the people they loved and that struck something within her. 

Resigning herself to the fact that she should try and get some sleep, she slipped in through the slider, closing and locking it behind her, dropped her mug in the sink, and laid restlessly in bed.

Thankfully, when she awoke the next morning she was hungry. Feeling indulgent and knowing the day ahead of her, she treated herself and made french toast and bacon, which she shared with Audrey.

The babysitter arrived at noon. Dany gave Audrey a tight squeeze and a kiss on the lips, before sneaking out when her happy toddler was distracted. If the roads were kind, she’d make it to Newport well before two, allowing her to join Missy and the other bridesmaids for mani/pedis before the rehearsal.

____________________________________________________________________________

Deciding that her lack of responsiveness to texts and the one call he placed to her were intentional, Jon determined that the best thing for both of them was a little space and time to clear their heads. He was able to work it out so that Arya drove him, Robb, and Talisa back to his and Dany’s house on Sunday morning, the day of the wedding. Robb and Talisa would relieve the babysitter and stay with Audrey until the following day.

Catelyn, of course, had not been happy with the way the events of the weekend had transpired. Having been running errands when Jon and Dany initially arrived and completely missing their blowout, she hadn’t the chance to see Audrey at all. 

To her credit, his mother had kept whatever opinions she held to herself and was pleased when Jon announced, somewhat drunk, that he’d stay the night with the family Friday and Saturday. The first night he spent getting deliriously drunk with his siblings, which lead to his need to stay as far away from alcohol as possible on Saturday. 

On Sunday morning Jon woke up still feeling the malaise of his hangover from the day before. Hoping to wash it away with coffee, he roused from his empty bed and found his way to the kitchen, still groggy.

“Coffee’s ready, if you’d like some.” His mother sat at the table, her back to him.

“Thanks, mum. Still got eyes in the back of your head, huh?”

“Everyone has a different cadence to their walk. When you have bare feet you tend to drag them on the floor.” Jon poured coffee into a mug and added a drop of stevia. “Audrey’s walk is similar.”

“You’ve memorized my two year old’s walk already?” He sat down across from her, never letting go of his coffee.

“She’s a lot like you.”

Jon rubbed a palm across his eye and back toward his temple. “If this …”

“It’s not.” She assured, darting her blue eyes to meet his brown. “Jon, I’ve made mistakes. I’ve been hard on all of you, but you the most.” She searched for the words, “from a young age, you reminded me so much of your father. You were always so dutiful, respectful. You started putting yourself to bed when you were ten. I had an idea of what I thought you’d do with your life and I saw it so clearly and I was so worried that you were going down a dangerous road.”

“I was always so afraid I was gonna let you and dad down, then I felt like I had.”

“You could never let us down. Your father is proud of you, I know it.”

Jon felt the sting of tears welling in his eyes. “I hope so.”

“I was wrong.”

“Wrong about what?”

“Daenerys has been a good influence on you. You don’t take yourself so seriously when she or Audrey are around.”

“You didn’t see us Friday.” His eyes rolling skyward.

“Jon,” His mother seemed at a loss for words. “Sansa told me about Daenerys’ parents; my actions could not have made things easy for her. You’re not the only Stark owing her an apology.” 

“She doesn’t yell. Ever. She gets quiet when she’s upset. I’ve never seen her like that.”

“It sounds to me like she’s repressed a lot and something finally cracked. _Apologize_ to her. Tell her why you’re angry, let her tell you why she’s angry. Jon, _talk_ to each other, but more importantly _listen_ to each other.”

Jon leaned his elbows forward on the table’s surface, his right hand hooked under the handle of the near empty mug. He wanted to say something, but he wasn’t sure what.

“For what it’s worth, I saw the chemistry between the two of you that first day.”

“In the apartment?”

“Yes.”

“How? She was there for ten seconds before she left.”

“I saw the way she looked at you, and you at her.”

“Then, why…?”  
“I was worried. All I knew about this girl was that you, well, that you were unfaithful with here. You were twenty six, I know, but in my head you were still that eighteen year old boy, leaving for college all wide-eyed. I haven’t been the best Christian in the past few years, especially toward Daen—Dany. But she _is_ family. Make sure she knows that, huh?”

Though he wouldn’t admit it, he was still not feeling a hundred percent when he kissed his mother goodbye. Giving Sansa a squeeze, rolling his eyes and flipping the bird to Pyp as he made some reference to the Odyssey before he hopped in the car and they were off.

The babysitter was surprised, to put it gently, when Jon arrived and told her they wouldn’t need her services for that day. He promised she’d receive her full pay for the weekend and she didn’t seem to have too much trouble accepting that.

Hanging his suit on the railing and dropping his overnight bag by the door, Jon reached for his excited daughter. She giggled as he spun her around and dropped kisses all over her face. Since he changed jobs two years prior, his travel schedule for work was significantly less demanding, but there were still a few times a year when he’d have to be out of town for several days. Even so, being away from Audrey never got easier. 

He spent as much time with her as he could, ran up the stairs to his bedroom to grab something, and opened the door just in time to greet Sam and Gilly, who’d been more than willing to give him a ride to the wedding. 

They arrived at the hotel with plenty of time to change and catch the shuttle to the ceremony. The small caveat being that the hotel wouldn’t let him check into his room, which had been booked in Dany’s name and did not have him listed on the reservation. If they were married, the polite woman behind the desk said, it might’ve been a little easier to help him out.

Oh, the irony.

He was faced with the option of either coughing up _another_ $350 for the night for an additional room, or accepting Sam and Gilly’s generosity, and changing in their room. Having already hemorrhaged money between all the food he bought Friday, paying a babysitter _not_ to watch his daughter, and having to rent a suit for this black tie wedding, he opted for the latter and hoped very much that he and Dany would be in a well enough place to share a room that night.

Jon sat on Grey’s side in the church, next to Sam and Gilly. As the soft chords of harp gently swept through the air, the doors in the back opened and the bridesmaids began walking down the aisle.

Though they all wore the same dress, none of them even compared to the sight that was Dany. It was a long black dress with a sweetheart neckline and was tailored perfectly, she barely even looked pregnant, to the untrained eye. Her silver-blonde hair was loosely braided from her right to left side and pinned in a bun at the base of her neck. She carried a bouquet of white and silver-grey roses. The contrast of light and dark did absolutely everything right on her and put butterflies in his stomach.

She caught his eye as she passed him and he offered a gentle, lopsided smile. Her reaction was unreadable, being as she’d been smiling for all the guests and the photographer her entire way down the aisle.

The ceremony included a full mass and Jon was certain this was the first time in his recollected life that he ever wished for mass to immediately end. He was a dutiful Christian, though, and spoke the prayers aloud, offered peace to his neighbors, accepted the body of Christ and said a prayer for the newlyweds.

When the mass was finally over, his plan was to sneak down the side aisle and door, and catch Dany before the were off to shoot photos. His plans were foiled before they could be put into motion when Podrick, a guy he’d played club soccer with, came over to say hello. Not wanting to be rude, Jon greeted him and asked how he’d been. After a brief chat, Jon apologized but said he wanted to catch the couple to congratulate them before they left.

Of course, as Jon was walking out the door, the limo was pulling away. It was everything Jon could do not to swear on the steps of a church.

The cocktail hour was held on the large stone veranda overlooking the water, it was a breathtaking sight and Jon could only imagine what the sunset would do to improve the view. The reception was to be held in the ballroom, overlooking the veranda.

Jon occupied his time with a few glasses of champagne and found himself actually enjoying catching up with people he hadn’t seen since college, or shortly after. So caught up in conversation, he hadn’t realized the bridal party had arrived for the cocktail hour until he saw Missy sipping on a drink and smiling at someone.

Scanning the area quickly for Dany, unsuccessful, he made his way through the crowd to give Missy a loose squeeze and a quick kiss on the cheek, giving Grey a firm shake with one hand and pulling him into a hug.

“Congrats you two, you look great, I’m so happy for you both!”

“Thanks man, we’re very happy you could make it.”

“Doesn’t Dany look hot? I almost died when I saw her in the dress!”

“She looks very lovely. I actually haven’t been able to find her yet, do you have any idea where she is?” Jon was hedging his bets that Dany wouldn’t have burdened Missy with the details of their fight on her wedding weekend.

“Oh, last I saw she was over by the bar.”

“Thanks, I’ll catch up with you guys later.” He also knew that the best thing he could do for the couple tonight was to occupy their time as little as possible, they had a lot of people to get to.

When he finally spotted her, she was bracing her hand on the bar, leaning forward, an infectious laugh engulfing her entire face. He felt those butterflies again.

Until he realized who she was speaking to.

Having completely forgotten that it was Missy who’d introduced Dany and Drogo, Jon felt a familiar pang of jealousy that he was still able to make her laugh like that.

She seemed to compose herself just as he found himself in front of them. Unsure of how to greet her, never having been in a fight like this before, he reached his hand out and rubbed her arm.

“Hey.”

“Hi.” Her tone was hesitant.

“Jon, man, good to see you!” Drogo clapped him on the back. “Dany and I were just exchanging stories about the kids. I hear you’ve got another on the way? Congrats. Two definitely make life more interesting, but be careful, once you get to three they outnumber you and I swear to god they know it right away.”

Jon gave a polite chuckle and added, “thanks for the intel.”

He always felt guilty for his unwarranted feelings toward Drogo when in his presence. The man had never been anything but nice to him, even after he learned of his and Dany’s relationship.

“Mind if I steal her from you for a minute?”

“By all means,” Drogo sipped his guinness and pulled Dany bear hug, kissing her temple. “Great to see you, cutie.”

“Could we maybe go somewhere to talk?”

“Jon, this is the middle of a wedding and they’re going to be doing the introductions soon.” Her tone offered little patience.

“Dany, I don’t like how we left things and I’ve missed you the past few days.”

“I figured you’d be happy being with your _family_.”

“Jesus Christ, you know that’s not what I meant.”

“I wanted you to come yesterday. You didn’t.”

“You ignored my texts and calls! In the real world, Dany, that means you don’t want to talk to or see someone.”

“Keep your voice down!” She hissed at him, “do _not_ make a scene at my best friend’s wedding!”

“Ladies and Gentlemen,” came a loud voice, “if you’ll make your way to your tables, we’ll be introducing the couple and their bridal party in just a few minutes.”

“Dany—“

“Not now.” She brushed past him.

_Well, this was going tremendously._

The introductions were followed by the speeches and the first dances. During all of which the bridal party lined the dance floor.

When Dany finally took her seat next to him, she occupied herself by speaking to Sam and Gilly, under the guise of catching up and seeing how married life was treating them.

It was after the salad that Jon grew tired of the forced pleasantries and took Dany by the elbow, “let’s step outside to the veranda for a minute to watch the sunset.”

“The view is fine from in here.” She gave him a tight smile.

“Dany, I’d like to speak with you on the veranda.” He said through gritted teeth.

Nodding, Dany acquiesced, “if you guys will excuse us a minute.”

“Jon, I don’t want to make a scene here.” She said once they were outside and around the corner, tucked safely out of view from the wedding guests.

“I didn’t come here to fight.”

Her face softened briefly before going to stone again as she stood straighter and crossed her arms over her chest. “Ok, what did you want to say, then?”

He’d prepared a speech in his head for days now, but in this moment all he wanted to do was wrap his arms around her. He couldn’t believe how easy it was to see through her blatant defense mechanism and how he hadn’t realized this ever before.

He gave into his instincts, pulling her to him fiercely and dropping a kiss into the crown of her head. 

“God, Dany. I’m so sorry.” He felt tears in his eyes as her resolve finally crumbled and she wrapped her arms around his back. “I love you, Dany. I love you, I love you, I love you. Dany of course you’re part of the family. Everything you did when we lost my dad, Talisa would be lost without you, I mean, _Jesus_ Sansa told _you_ about Pyp before any of us.”

She pulled back and wiped her own tears with the pads of her thumbs. “While I’m not sorry for keeping Sansa’s confidence, I am sorry too. Jon, I know I shouldn’t have said what I said. Or I guess also _how_ I said it. To..” she paused, “…Ygritte, I mean.”

“No, but I see now why you did. I didn’t realize how much my guilt affected you and I’ve unfairly projected that onto you. I promise you this, that is done. If you think I’m doing it, let me know, call me on it. I need you to feel comfortable talking to me about this.”

“Jon, it’s very hard to talk with you about it and I…I understand the guilt, but, I don’t know it just has always felt like this off limits topic. The few times we’ve talked about it, I haven’t known whether you were going to be sweet and reassuring or irritated and grouchy.”

“This is exactly what you need to tell me. I can’t fix something if I don’t realize I’m doing it. I can’t change overnight, but I promise to work on it, on everything, but most of all on us.” He paused and added, “I’ll throw away that bag.”

“Why did you keep it? Can you answer me that?”

“At first, it was because I thought I’d give it back to her and I didn’t feel it was mine to get rid of. Honestly, after you moved in I completely forgot about it. Then when you found it two years ago, I guess I just wanted a reminder of the kind of person I’ve been.”

“The thing that bothers me the most is that this,” she gestured between them, “all of this happened. It _happened_ , Jon. Sometimes it feels like it’s the _us_ part that you regret.”

“Oh god, Dany. No. Never. You, Audrey, the new baby, you’re everything. You’re the last thing I could ever regret. If I could’ve I would’ve started _us_ earlier. I just didn’t think that was what you wanted. Sometimes I felt rejected.”

Dany let out an ironic laugh. “I pushed you away because I didn’t think you wanted to stay. I thought it was just sex to you. And, I guess I was afraid of my own feelings.”

“If I’m going to work on the guilt thing, you’re gonna have to stop pushing me away when you get upset.” He cupped his hands on either side of her face, “I promise you, I’m not going anywhere. You _are_ my family.”

“That’s the thing. Deep down, I know that, and I trust you. But I…Jon I can’t be left again. I won’t. No one’s ever going to leave me feeling like that again.”

While Jon was expecting this, he wasn’t going to be the one to bring it up first. “Dany, I know your life has led you to think otherwise, but people _stay _, when things get rocky, when they scream at each other, they _stay_. You’re stuck with me. I’m here, and I’m yours, forever. But you’ve got to let me know when you’re starting to feel that way. _Please._ I can’t have you running away from me. We need to face these things that we’re so afraid of.”__

__“So, I guess we’ve got a lot to work on. I will work on it, Jon. I want to be better.”_ _

__“We will. We both will. Together. But for the immediate future, let’s go back in there and have some fun. The conversations have waited eight years, I think they can wait at least until the car ride home tomorrow.”_ _

__She smiled and took his hand._ _

__“How did you get here, anyway?”_ _

__“Sam and Gilly.”_ _

__The remainder of dinner passed without event and they tried to remain as long as they could at the party, but fatigue got the best of them both and they excused themselves a little before ten._ _

__As they stood before the door, Jon moved out of her way. “You’re gonna have to let us in. I couldn’t get a key.”_ _

__Pulling the card from her wallet and waving it at the scanner and hearing the familiar click of the unlocking, she pushed the door open._ _

__“Why wouldn’t they give you a key?”_ _

__“I was half convinced you told them not to let me near you.”_ _

__“Oh, come on.” She rolled her eyes._ _

__“My name wasn’t on the reservation. They said I would’ve had an easier time if we were married.”_ _

__“Oh.”_ _

__“Which I agree with.”_ _

__Dany turned to him, unsure._ _

___It’s now or never…_ _ _

__Bracing himself, Jon knelt and reached into his breast pocket to retrieve the ring._ _

__She gasped, covered her mouth, and began to cry._ _

__“Oh my god, Jon.”_ _

__“Dany, this marriage thing was another miscommunication. I would’ve married you in 2011 if I thought you’d say yes. We’ve got a lot to work on, but I’m here for all of it. I’ve had this since the Christmas after Audrey was born. I’ve just been waiting for the right time and I—“_ _

__“Yes.”_ _

__A smile overwhelmed his face, “yeah? For real?”_ _

__“Yes, yes, yes, for real!”_ _

__He stood and slipped the ring onto her finger before pulling him to her in a kiss._ _

__As they moved toward the bed, she broke the kiss. “We probably shouldn’t say anything, just yet.”_ _

__He smiled and pecked her lips briefly, “what you don’t want to broadcast that we got engaged at Missy’s wedding?”_ _

__“Probably not the best bridesmaid etiquette.”_ _

__He chuckled and began working at the back of her dress._ _

__“By the way, you in this dress? Dangerous.”“Oh you think so?”_ _

__He leaned down and sucked gently at her ear and neck. “Let’s just say, it’s a good thing you’re already pregnant.” He saw the goosebumps form on her skin as his languidly pulled at her zipper, “because I plan on _a lot_ of trying tonight.”_ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know how i got so lucky, but ice-and-fire-trash also created the scene where Jon sees Dany at the altar and has butterflies in his stomach. It's incredible and you need to see it: https://ice-and-fire-trash.tumblr.com/image/170561908835
> 
>  
> 
> I’m so happy you all like the last flashback chapter! I was so nervous about that one.
> 
> I absolutely love everyone’s reactions and comments. Seeing you guys having dialogues about what motivates Jon or Dany and the fact that these characters feel real to you is more that I could’ve ever asked for.
> 
> I hope I did the resolution of their fight justice. 
> 
> Thank you all! 20 down, 2 to go!


	21. Nothing is Wrong

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's song is Nothing is Wrong, by Gomez  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ysT76lpmJIA

The hot water rained on Dany’s tired body. As she turned and raised her face toward the water, she wished she could stay in this cleansing warmth. Humming and giving her face one last splash, she switched the water off and wrapped herself in one of the oversized towels. One thing Dany recognized was, the nicer the hotel, the bigger the towels.

She wrung out her hair but elected to leave it down instead of wrapping it up on top of her head. She ran her palm across the surface of the mirror, brushing away the condensation and getting a look at herself in the mirror. She hadn’t washed any makeup off last night and the water she’d just used in the shower had only served to smudge her eye makeup. Pulling the makeup wipes Missy had included in the bridesmaids gift bag, she scrubbed at her face and opened the bathroom door.

Jon had woken in the time she’d gotten up and taken her shower. He was sitting up, leaning an elbow on his knee, hand tangled in his hair as he looked down at his phone.

“Hey, what’re you looking at?”

He looked up at her, startled. “The photographer already put up some preview photos. It should be a crime for you to have looked so much better than Missy.”

Discarding the wipe, she propped herself up on the bed, pulling her long hair over her shoulder and reaching for his phone to look. One of the pictures was of the dance floor, Jon and Dany were easily spotted, she was mid twist and looking at him. They were both smiling, laughing, at something. “Not to sound narcissistic, but I think we look really cute here.”

He took his phone, locked, and replaced it on the nightstand. He slid across the bed to wrap his arms around her from behind and placed a kiss on her bare shoulder. She turned and rubbed a thumb on his cheek, “I love you.” She gave him a brief, toothless smile.

Wrapping her hand in his, “I sense there’s a but coming?”

She broke his gaze, sighing. “I’m still upset with you. I don’t want to fight again, but I just…I feel sad. I don’t know what to do with that.”

“I think that’s normal. There’s a lot of things we’ve hidden from. I’ve made more mistakes than I can count and looking back at all of this, I feel like I’ve taken you for granted.”

“I kinda feel like we’re back at square one? Like, how do we move past this?”

“I think talking like we are is a start. The rest, I don’t know. But I want to put this behind us.”

“I don’t want to forget. I have a warped sense of family, I know. That’s something I need to work on, and I’m willing to; I don’t want our kids to grow up in any way similar to how I did.”

“They won’t, they _aren’t_. You’re far too hard on yourself, Dany. I think part of that is my fault, I was complicit in letting my mother and, at one point, Sansa be cold to you. I should’ve been on your side. I guess I just thought nothing phased you, that you had a tough skin.”

She let out a small laugh, “I am tough.”

“You’re deflecting.” He traced a loving hand across her back, wiping away some of the water that had dripped from her wet hair. “I owe you a lot more than this. I can’t say enough how sorry I am for the other day.”

“That was a pretty shitty thing to do. I shouldn’t have been so petty, I know. But, walking into that with the tension from the night before still fresh, and seeing the way you looked at her, I don’t know, I felt like was sucker punched.”

“It was kinda a form of closure for me, to be honest. Dany, I was proud of her. She looked happy and she’s successful and I guess it was nice to see that she’s achieved all of that, despite of me. I was worried of rubbing us in her face.”

“You didn’t want her to see your family, Jon.”

“No, that’s not it at all. I didn’t want her to see how happy I was. We were. We are. I thought that was just unfair.” He shifted from his position behind her to face her. “But she’s happy.”

“What, did you think she was going to just be miserable after everything with you? Ruined for the rest of her life?”

“I mean, I realize now how narcissistic that sounds, but I guess a part of me worried that.”

“What’d you say to her in the parking lot?”

“I apologized for everything. She said she appreciated that. She said she didn’t begrudge us any happiness, but that she wanted to leave the past in the past.”

“I second that sentiment. But I don’t know, I guess I just felt like oh, there you were off running to make sure she was ok when I was right there.”

“I wasn’t thinking. I never got the chance to properly apologize to her and…”

“Do you think she needed your apology?”

“I needed to say it, Dany. Say it while we both had a clear head. I’m sorry that I hurt her, but I’m not sorry about us. I just wish we, you and me, could’ve gotten our shit together earlier.”

“I wouldn’t change it, if I could. I know that sounds terrible, but all of the things that we’ve fucked up, I don’t think the _us_ aspect would be what it is without the things we’ve gotten through.”

“She was right, though.”

“About?”

“I am happy. Really happy. You push me and you pull me, but you get me better than anyone. There’s no other way I’d want my life to have turned out.”

“Easy there, killer. We’re 30, not 60.”

“You know what I mean though. I don’t know what I’d do if you hadn’t come back into my life when you did. It was like kismet, as cheesy as that sounds.”

She put a hand on his knee, squeezing it gently. “I think we should wait to get married.” This was the thought that pulled her out of bed this morning, gnawing at her. She saw the sadness cross his face, “I want to marry you, I do. I just feel like, right now we’re not ready.”

“But we’re ready for two kids?”

“I want our relationship to be at its strongest when we get married and right now we’re just not there. Maybe this is the incentive we need to work harder?”

“That’s fair.”

“You don’t sound convinced.”

“I want you as my wife, yes. And the idea of waiting makes me a little sad, yes. But the fact that we’re not in the best place, that is the part that’s really bothering me.”

“We’ll get there.” She stood and ran a hand along his arm, “in the meantime, I’m gonna get dressed and maybe we do a quick drive by at brunch and then hit the road? I miss Audrey.”

She gave Missy and Grey each a tight squeeze and they made tentative plans to see each other later in the fall.

By the time they made it home, she was exhausted of talking and could think of nothing other than snuggling with Audrey on the couch. 

“Well hello there, stranger.” Robb greeted her with a quick hug and a kiss on the cheek. “Talisa was actually just checking on Audrey.”

“Was she good for you?”

“She’s exhausting. I think watching her had the opposite effect of preparing us.”

Dany gave him an amused smile. “They don’t come out like that, luckily for us all. You get used to the crazy over time. I’m honestly not going to remember what to do with a newborn.”

“Look who’s awake and happy for mommy and daddy!” Talisa’s voice was chipper. 

Dany captured her daughter in her arms and peppered her face with kisses. “I missed you so much!” Audrey squealed with delight and returned Dany’s kisses with open mouthed and wet ones of her own. She was shocked when the little hand touched her belly and she said “be-be.”

“That’s right honey, that’s where the baby is.”

“We were working on that all weekend, but she hasn't quite gotten it yet.”

“Seems like she’s got it, to me?” Dany was confused.

At that moment, Jon dropped their bags on the floor by the door, “oh someone looks happy!”

“Give her to Jon, you’ll see what I mean.”

Jon, not sure what he was walking into, happily took hold of Audrey. After a minute of a greeting which warmed Dany’s heart, their daughter pulled back and placed her hands on Jon’s stomach, “be-be.”

“Well, she’s got part of the concept right.”

“So, you two had a good time?”

Dany exchanged a glance with Jon before turning to them and rolling her eyes dramatically and smiled as she held up her left hand. “You could say that.”

“Oh my god! Congratulations!” Talisa’s arms were around her faster than she could process the words.

“Well, Jesus, it’s about time.” Robb said as he patted Jon on the back.

“We want to keep it kinda quiet for right now.” Jon leaned to the ground, letting Audrey roam free, already tired of her parents affections. He wrapped an arm loosely over Dany’s shoulder and pulled her to him briefly.

“You gotta tell the rest of the family, dude. Sansa and Arya gonna be pumped and mum’s gonna be thrilled.”

“Oh she’ll be _thrilled,_ ” Dany found herself unable to hold the sarcasm from her tongue.

At Robb’s questioning gaze, Jon answered, “we’re working out a few things still.”

“You have any idea on what the date will be?”

“Not yet,” Jon picked up the bags and headed for the stairs.

“We wouldn’t want to rush into anything,” Dany teased, placing a palm on her belly and waving a hand around them.

That evening was nice, Audrey dozed gently in her lap as she lay back against Jon, curled in the crux of his arm and a warm breeze filtered in through the open door.

“Hey,” she felt him nudge her. “Let’s go to bed. I can carry her.”

Blinking, “I must’ve fallen asleep too. I’ll bring her up, she’s so twisted around me that she’ll probably wake if you try to move her.”

Of course, Audrey did wake halfway up the stairs. It took Dany nearly twenty minutes to calm her down and get her back to sleep, in the comfort of her own crib.

“She ok?” Jon asked from their bathroom, brushing his teeth.

“You know that thing when you’re perfectly comfortable on the couch but move to the bed and can’t fall asleep? I think that’s what happened to her.”

“Gonna happen to you tonight too?”

“I hope not.”

“I gotta tell you something.” Jon sat on the bed next to her, he looked nervous.

“You want to go out to breakfast tomorrow?”

“Dany…”

“What is it?”

“So, I had a lot to drink on Friday.”

“Ok….”

“I told my family about your…parents.”

She stood and moved to long window in their room, crossing her arms and leaving her back to him as she watched the reflection of the moon dance along the surface of the water. Unsure of what to say, how to feel or react, she turned her head to him and then back to the scene in front of her.

“Dany, I…”

“My parents gone.” Her voice left no room for debate.

“Please don’t shut me out.” He wrapped his arms around her from behind and she didn’t pull away, despite the instinct.

“I was drunk and upset, Dany. I know it’s your story to tell, but even if you don’t want to talk about that with anyone, _I_ needed to. I need to.”

“I thought we decided to put the past in the past?” She was less angry than he expected, but she sounded far more sad.

“We did, but-“

She covered her hand over her eyes and took a breath, “and god, now they’re all going to feel bad for me and give me that _look_.”

“What look?”

“The one that says _oh you poor thing_ , it’s part pity and part condescension.”

“C’mon Dany, it’s not like that. If anything, I think they’re impressed by who you are, what you’ve achieved.”

“Oh yeah, Jon’s little broken girlfriend who he fixed.”

“I think we’re both a bit broken.” He knew the next words could go either way, “and fiancee.”

She brushed past him, to the bathroom, and closed the door.

Unsure whether it best to let her complete her nightly routine in peace or to knock on the door, he opted for the former. He put on his pajamas and sat with his back against the headboard, aimlessly thumbing through the pages of the book he’d been trying to get through for the better part of a year. 

The bathroom door opened, she turned out the light, and wordlessly claimed into bed beside him, facing away from him. He sat for a minute, debating the best thing to say, or even staying silent.

“You know,” she said, rolling over to face him, “it’s not like I wanted to hide anything about my past.”

“I know.”

“I don’t want people to look at me and think there’s something _wrong_ with me, Jon.”

“Why would anyone think that?”

“Because I come from a fucked up home. It was so fucked up, you couldn’t even call it broken. It was never _not_ broken to begin with.”

“I think you’ve done a pretty good job of putting the pieces together yourself.”

She sighed and he took the way she was looking at him as an invitation to move closer. She closed her eyes and let him kiss her forehead.  
____________________________________________________________________________

“I had a thought,” she said from across the counter as he cooked breakfast a Saturday morning in early October. 

“What’s that?” He was only half paying attention as he moved the bacon from the pan to the awaiting paper towel, ready to soak up the grease.

“Let’s do Thanksgiving here.”

“Here? I don’t know that we can fit everyone.”

“Well, not everyone could stay over…”

The eggs now fully cooked and the last piece of bacon nearly crisp enough, Jon turned the burners off and brushed some eggs onto their plates. “You want me to cut up her bacon?” Dany nodded and he quickly broke apart a few strips and sprinkled them into Audrey’s bowl before crossing the length of the kitchen and plopping it down in front of his daughter, who sat up comfortable on the counter as Dany chaperoned.

It wasn’t until he took his seat next to her that he responded. “I don’t hate the idea.” He remembered how fun it was to be the house that hosted the holidays. The excitement and anticipation of people arriving, waiting for his favorite cousins to play with, a change in pace from his siblings he was always around. “There’s something nice about not having to go anywhere on a holiday.”

“I just want to start making traditions of our own.”

“Who do you want to invite? I don’t think there’s enough room for Missy’s family…”

“No, I know. I already talked to her about going down there between Thanksgiving and Christmas to see her family.”

“You tell her about us yet?”

A smile spread across her face, “just this week actually. She thought it was hilarious but said, and I quote, _I’d literally castrate him if he did that during the ceremony._ ”

“And obviously you stood up for your man.” He teased.

“Oh, I told her that would’ve been fine, I’ve already got two kids out of you.”

“I’ll keep that in mind, Targaryen.”

“I don’t want to change my name.” He was mid bite. “And I don’t want to hyphenate.”

“Ok.”

“I know we’re not _there_ yet. But I’ve been thinking a lot about that. I was born as Daenerys Targaryen, and that’s who I want to stay.”

“Dany, I don’t have a problem with you keeping your name.” He’d never actually thought about it before. He assumed she’d change her name, but he realized as he said the words that wasn’t at all bothered at the concept.

“Your mother will probably have some thoughts on it.”

“Good thing you’re not marrying my mother then.” He stood and carried their plates to the sink, turning on the faucet to rinse them.

“I feel like so much of my identity is tied to you, I want to keep this part. Plus…it’s the last thing I have of my dad.”

Shutting off the water and leaving the dishes for a moment, he returned to her, pressing one arm on the counter and the other on the back of her chair, “Dany, you don’t have to talk me into this. I’m fine with you keeping your name.” He placed a kiss on her nose and took Audrey from the counter into his arms.

In one of their many talks since Labor Day, Jon tried to tell Dany about his conversation with his mother. He could see that she appreciated the sentiment, but was still cool to the idea of her. He’d decided not to push the issue and let them work it out themselves.

 

____________________________________________________________________________

 

“Don’t mind me,” Jon’s voice rang from the porch door. “just popping in for another round of beers outside.” His hand slid quickly along her back as he moved past her and open the fridge, the glass bottles on the side clinking against one another.

Jon, Robb, and Pyp had the brilliant idea to fry a second turkey outside, much to each of their respective significant others’ dismay. “If you burn down our house or any part of it…” Dany’s threat trailed off as Jon wrapped his arms around her from behind and kissed her cheek. 

“We’re being safe, I promise.”

“I’m sure you and Robb are, but I have my doubts about Pyp.” Sansa chimed in as she arranged the charcuterie.

“We’re keeping him in line.” Jon winked, moving past her, hands overflowing with beer. He stopped at the door and turned to them, “ahem. Little help here?”

Sansa rolled her eyes and pushed the door open for him, “didn’t think that one through, did ya?” Once Jon was outside, Sansa grabbed for the open bottle of prosecco on the counter. “You know, I’m going to end up finishing this whole thing myself if mum and Arya don’t get here soon.”

Dany chuckled, gesturing to her stomach, “I’d help you if I could, but…” 

“Oh, a little booze never hurt any kid.” Sansa teased. “Besides, Arya is gonna wanna drink that weird beer Pyp brought back from Portland.”

“I am interested to try that. Jon said I’d probably actually like it. He said some of them taste like sour patch kids. It’s too bad there aren’t any on the east coast, yet.”

“I promise you, in a year or so, they’ll be all over the place here. Seriously, everything starts on the west coast and moves east.”

“What’s this about moving to the west coast?” Talisa asked, joining them in the kitchen, groggy.

“Interestingly enough, we’re talking about beer.” Dany switched the faucet on and lathered up her hands, having finished dressing the turkey. “How are you feeling?”

“I’m good, just a little tired. But I don’t want to sleep and miss the whole day.” She pointed a finger at the coffee pot in question.

“Yes, plenty in there, should still be hot, too.” Dany didn’t envy Talisa’s current circumstance; an infant of barely three weeks was not something you wanted to be carting around, especially a first born. She was fairly confident Audrey left the house solely for doctor’s appointments for the first eight weeks of her life. Talisa was taking it like a champ, though, insisting that she wanted to be present as a family for the holiday. A holiday which wasn’t even native to her home country. “How’s Roslin? Audrey isn’t bothering her at all, right?”

“Not at all, actually. Both of them were still fast asleep when I came down. Looks like Audrey may actually be ready for the big girl bed.”

“That’s a relief. We’ve noticed her getting a little territorial and honestly I swear it’s because she knows she’s not going to be an only child for much longer.”

“Hello family! Have no fear, everyone’s favorite Stark is here!” Arya’s voice echoed from the foyer. She rounded the corner, arms and hands loaded with bags, “where you want this?”

“Anything that needs to be kept cold can probably just be put on the bench out on the porch, no more room left in the fridge. Anything else, I guess just toss on the counter and we’ll find space for it. What is all this, anyway?”

Arya piled the bags on the limited counter space with a loud clang, “mum wanted to contribute to dinner, since she wasn’t hosting. She’s just grabbing some presents for the kids from her car.” She was out the back door, in search of her brothers, as quickly as she’d come.

Dany had to turn from the youngest Stark to hide her rolling eyes. _Of course_ she needed to contribute. And by _contribute_ , she obviously meant _maintain some semblance of control over the holiday._

Dany hadn’t seen Jon’s mother since before Labor Day and she was at least a little embarrassed that their fight had occurred at the woman’s house. Jon had told her on more than a few occasions that his mother had expressed remorse over the way she’d treated Dany. In her defense, Catelyn had stopped making a fuss of her and Jon _living in sin_ nearly immediately after Audrey was born and had clearly been—dare she say—happy when she learned of Dany’s second pregnancy. Jon told Catelyn of their engagement over the phone when Dany was in the other room, but she heard the happy tone in his voice as he discussed it. While that helped to abate some of the tension, Dany was still left with a bad taste in her mouth when it came to Catelyn Stark.

“Hi girls!” Dany jumped and turned at her voice, _speak of the devil._ “You all look beautiful.” She pulled Sansa to her first, placing a kiss at her temple. “Oh Talisa, you poor thing. You look exhausted.”

 _Of course she’s exhausted,_ Dany thought, irritated; _she’s got a newborn._

“Daenerys, thank you for offering to take on the task of hosting. I can say from experience that it’s quite the feat to manage while pregnant.”

Dany couldn’t say for sure, but it felt like a back handed compliment.

“May I see the ring?”

Dany _was_ excited to show off the ring Jon had given her. It was a cushion cut with a halo and a platinum band. She and Jon had never discussed rings, but he _nailed it_.

Catelyn pulled Dany’s left hand into her own and inspected the ring closely. “Well, that is absolutely stunning.” She gave what Dany could only assume was a warm smile.

“He did a pretty good job with it, yes.”

“The boys are outside?”

“They’re claiming to be prepping the fryer for the turkey, but so far all they’ve done is stand around it holding beers and occasionally take breaks to throw the football around.” Sansa answered her mother.

“I’m going to pop out there and say hi to them.” She paused, turning back to Dany, “please let me know if there’s anything I can do to help.”

“Thanks, will do.” Dany forced a tight grin.

Robb and Sansa insisted on clearing the dinner dishes as Jon, Pyp, and Arya brought Audrey outside to play and Talisa succumbed to the tryptophan and attempted a nap alongside Roslin.

This was how Dany found herself alone at the table with Catelyn.

“The food was delicious, Dany. I never would’ve thought to cook the stuffing outside of the turkey, but it was far more moist than I’ve had and those potatoes on the bottom were delicious.”

Had Jon’s mother actually called her Dany? “It’s barefoot contessa. My best friend’s family always use this recipe so I figured I’d give it a shot.”

“I’d say it was a successful first attempt.”

“Thank you.” Dany sipped her tea. One thing she would be grateful for after the baby was born would be afternoon coffee, something she missed dearly. Well, that and, of course, having the new baby.

“I’ve wanted to say some things to you for a long time, now.”

Dany was skeptical, “should I be nervous?”

Catelyn moved to the seat next to her. “I’ve been unfair to you, and I owe you an apology. It’s not easy for me to admit when I’m wrong and I should’ve said something sooner.”

“So that’s where Jon gets it.” Dany was uncomfortable and wanted to lighten the mood. The look she received in reply told her perhaps now wasn’t the time.

“You worried me. Of all my children, Jon was the most conscientious. From a young age he followed the rules and even made some of his own. He was the only one who never complained about going to church with me.” Catelyn gave Dany a sad smile, “I imagined a path for him, and entire life. I assumed that crumbled to pieces when everything ended the way it did with Ygritte. I should’ve given him more credit and I certainly shouldn’t have come to such a conclusion before getting to know you. Seeing you, with Jon and with Audrey. Honestly, even with Robb and Talisa, and Sansa and Pyp, and of course Arya I see that my opinion was ill formed and there’s a sparkle in Jon’s eyes when he’s around you. That’s something I’ve never seen before. You push him out of his comfort zone and that’s exactly what he needs.” The elder woman heaved out a deep breath and waited for Dany to respond.

“I’m not quite sure I know what to say, to be honest.” Dany shifted in her seat, “I’ve not had the greatest experience with mother figures and I stopped trying to please you once it seemed your mind had been made up about me. I love Jon, but things between us have always been complicated. Even after I moved back, it was exhausting trying to compete with a ghost for affection.”

“I know, and if I could go back and correct my behavior, I would.”

“Our pasts are part of us, however fucked up they may be.” Dany heard Catelyn’s sharp intake of breath at her swear. But the woman held her tongue. “I know Jon told you about my parents, but I still wouldn’t take that back. It’s taken me a long time and a lot of therapy throughout the years, but I realize now that I’m the person I am because of all of that. I survived that, I can survive anything.”

“I am sorry, Dany, for what you’ve gone through and for my part in making it harder for you.”

“I was angry with Jon for telling everyone, at least at first.” Dany rubbed her right hand up and down her left arm, uncomfortable. “I almost told you, though. After Ned passed. I also came close to telling Sansa when we met for drinks one time. Just never felt like the right moment.”

“I’m sorry you never felt comfortable sharing this with us, but I can understand why. I know you’ve long since mended fences with Sansa, and I hope the same can one day be said for us.”

“I don’t give trust away freely. It probably takes me too long to let anyone in, but I’d say this is a step forward.”

Later that evening, when all the dishes had been washed and the pans set out to dry. When goodbyes were had and they had the house _mostly_ to themselves—save for Robb, Talisa, and Roslin, who were all fast asleep—Dany sat on her computer, scrolling through the early black Friday deals, a sleeping Audrey by her side. Her gaze caught sight of Jon’s form as he entered the bedroom looking dazed, having fallen asleep on the couch in the early evening.

“Welcome back to the land of the living.” She smiled as she closed the computer and set it on her nightstand. 

“I”m more a zombie than a real person, right now.” His vision fell on Audrey. “You want me to move her?”

Dany gazed adoringly at her daughter, “I kinda want to snuggle with her tonight. I know it’s a bad habit to get into, but she’s got a lot of changes coming at her in the next few months.”

“One night can’t hurt.” Jon rationalized for her.

“Today was successful.”

“By the way they had to carry Arya out, I’d have to agree with you.”

“Maybe next year, less gin cocktails?”

“Fewer.” Jon cocked a grin at her and wiggled his brows. She rolled her eyes and ignored the comment.

“I talked to your mother.” 

Jon paused his dressing, t-shirt halfway on. “Oh?”

“She basically told me what you said she told you.”

“And?”  
“It felt genuine. But it’s not going to happen overnight, Jon.”

“Progress is _progress_. _We’re_ not there yet.”

She looked at him with a smile that reached her eyes, “no, not _yet_ , but we’re getting there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey Everyone!
> 
> I’m sorry for how long it took to get this chapter up. I needed to take a step back for a few days because I felt like this story was taking over my life a little.
> 
> But, I do care so much that I’ve spent the majority of the day editing and re-writing this. (How dedicated am I? Well, today is my birthday, folks!)
> 
> I am glad so many of you expressed the problems you had with the last chapter. I want this story to be the best it can be and when so many people are bumping on the same thing, that isn’t something I’m doing right.
> 
> Shocking to probably no one, I’m going to bump out the number of chapters. I want to resolve this story, but the last thing I want is for it to feel rushed.
> 
> Constructive feedback helps me make the story better, and I sincerely appreciate it. 
> 
> I do ask, though, that everyone be respectful of other commenters as well as other authors. It warms my heart so much that this story has evoked such passionate responses, more than I can put into words. We’re all on the same ship here.
> 
> I want to express my sincere and extreme gratitude to those of you following, commenting, bookmarking, whatever else. The only reason I’ve gotten this story so far is because of all of YOU.
> 
> Finally, huge thanks for the input and support AND an early B-Day shout-out to InBoccaAlLupo. We went to this Game of Thrones pop up bar to celebrate our Birthdays on Saturday. If you’re in or around the Boston area, I highly recommend checking it out. Sadly, it’s only open until Wednesday.
> 
> Ok, sorry for such a long note. Hope you all have a great rest of your week!
> 
> -RLD


	22. Two Points for Honesty

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's song is: Two Points for Honesty, by Guster 
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vZs72wu5d_4

The gentle knock of the slow tide against the boats moored in the bay and the quiet ding of the rigging against the masts provided a perfect score to Dany’s Saturday morning. She sat comfortably in one of their new deck chairs, her right leg folded underneath her left thigh, a steaming cup of coffee clutched in her hands. It was the first morning she didn’t feel the need to drape her favorite light blanket over herself as she greeted the day.

Having grown up by the water and never having lived landlocked, she found herself now unable to fathom waking to anything but the sound of the tide making its way in or out. Unable to imagine the blue, pink, orange, and red sunsets which had easily become common place.

The low hum of the slider echoed behind her, Jon clearing his throat. “You need more coffee?” She turned her head far enough to reply over her shoulder, shaking her half drank cup above her heard.

“The baby awake?”

She heard and smelt the refill of her favorite wake up medicine. 

“Audrey is entertaining herself with Paw Patrol on the iPad, Teddy is somehow still asleep.”

“I think your son takes after his father in the sleep department.” 

“Excuse me, I was awake before you this morning.”

Dany shook her head at him, “in the entirety of our relationship, I think this may’ve been the fourth time you got up before me. And might I remind you, I was up at 3 AM feeding him.”

“He woke up last night?”

“Case in point.” Dany tilted her mug in his direction and took a sip.

“Sansa says she and Pyp don’t want a long engagement.”

“Not long, like less than two years or not long like six months?”

“She has mum calling vineyards around here inquiring about September dates.”

“Jesus Jon, that’s like three months. Think _she’s_ going for a shotgun wedding?”

Jon leaned back in his chair and chuckled softly, sipping at his own coffee. “I doubt it. Last I heard she wasn’t even fully convinced she wanted kids.”

Dany gave him a skeptical look, “what’s that expression you Catholics are so fond of? We plan and God laughs?”

“True.” Jon relented.

“Can you see Audrey from where you’re sitting?”

“I can and she is glued to the iPad, don’t worry.”

“Great parents we are.”

“It’s barely past eight. I think we can allow her a little bit of screen time.”

“We need to be careful about that though, I don’t want her to be raised on TV. All my early childhood memories revolve around when I could watch Mr. Rogers.” Dany paused, “well, that and what was happening on All My Children or General Hospital.”

“You watched soap operas when you were a kid?”

“It was the late eighties and early nineties, it was a simpler time.” Dany shrugged. Though she didn’t like to think much about her adolescence, there were a few fond memories of her mother buried in there, before she learned where she came from, before she noticed that any happiness and affection had come from her father.

“Does it bother you?”

“Soap operas?”

“The fact that Sansa is going to be married before we are.”

“Does it bother _you_?”

“You like to do that.” He observed.

“Do what? What do I do?” She leaned forward in her chair, straightening her back.

“Deflect. Avoid answering a question.”

She shifted again, turning away from him for the briefest of moments. When she turned back, the wind blew wisps of her hair around her face. “I don’t want a big wedding.”

“So you’ve said.”

She inhaled deeply. “I don’t want to get married in a church.”

“What do you want?”

“Something small. Something with just us. Maybe your immediate family, but no one else.”

“What about Missy? What about…” Jon trailed off for a moment, seemingly debating the next question, “What about Drogo?”

“You’d invite Drogo to our wedding?”

“You’d want him there, so…”

“It wouldn’t bother you at all? Not one bit?” She didn’t believe for a second he’d like Drogo to be present.

“Would I love it? No. But, my foolish insecurities aside, he’s been an important person for you and that’s more important to me.”

Dany felt a rush of warmth in her chest. Her eyes drifted to the deck below her, through the glass of the table. “The fact that you’re willing to be so open minded is honestly enough. But no. I don’t need anyone there besides you and Audrey and Teddy.”

“Well, we need a witness…”

Dany wasn’t sure how to articulate her feelings. Sure, there’d been times in the years she’d been with Jon that she imagined the big wedding with a lace dress—though in years past she’d imagined far too much ruching. But recently, when she imagined their wedding it wasn't so much the day which excited her, but what it represented.

“I don’t want to be that couple who feels sad after the wedding is over. Remember how down Talisa was the day after her and Robb’s wedding? I don’t want the wedding to be about the _day_ I want it to be about what the day represents.”

“Don’t tell that to the fifty episodes of Say Yes to the Dress currently occupying our DVR.”

“Don’t pretend you haven’t sat there with me and watched several of the episodes,” she teased, “just because I don’t want a lot of people there doesn’t mean I won’t have a bomb ass dress.”

“That a technical term?”

“Of course.” Dany smiled into her coffee. Something about the ease with which they discussed the topic felt perfect. “What time do you have to leave tomorrow?” This was the first time Jon would be traveling out of town since Teddy had been born; though she’d taken an extended maternity leave and wouldn’t have to worry about navigating daycare on her own the following week, she wasn’t exactly looking forward to his being gone.

Jon leaned back in his chair, resting his left leg on his right, ankle pressed against knee forming a little triangle between his legs. Audrey would only sit on his lap if he was seated in this position. She’d seen Jon holding Teddy there and was not pleased about having to share _her spot_. 

“Flight’s at eight, which means I probably gotta be out of here by five, and that’s even cutting it close. I figured I’d drive to the airport because my flight home on Friday doesn’t land until late.”

“You’re gonna have to wake Audrey up before you go. She’ll be nightmare tomorrow if you don’t say bye to her.”

“What was it you called her the other day? A threenager?”

Dany rolled her eyes at him, “I honestly can’t even imagine what she’s going to be like when she’s a teen.”  
“I know this is gonna be a tough week, but if we land this client, my commission is going to almost triple.”

“That mean you’re going to be traveling even more, then? This place has office locations all over the US.”

“No, that’s the good thing. As lead, they’ll only need me for stuff like this. Once we’ve secured the contract, I get to leave the day to day crap to the account managers.”

“So it’s one week, and only one week.”

“One week, and only one week.” He assured.

____________________________________________________________________________

“Jon, I really think this is a terrible idea,” was how Missy answered the phone.

“Everything is just still so unresolved. You don’t think that there’s a part of her holding onto hope?”

Missy sighed, “Jon. You didn’t know her freshman year. She was a complete basket case. Any time she got drunk, she’d go to bed crying into her pillow. I had to wake her up one morning and pull her history out of her. Jon, she…”

“I know, she cut herself.”

“But like _a lot_. She was in, just like, a real rough spot.”

“I want to tell her mother to go fuck herself. I want her to see what Dany’s accomplished. That she’s a hundred times the mother that raised her and that’s all her own doing. That it’s no thanks to her cunt of a mother.”

“Jon, you’re gonna open up some pretty tender wounds if you try this. Dany has made it clear that she’d rather consider her mother dead than think anything different.”

“She deserves more than a few ratty pictures, Missy.”

“Look, she never told me about this. But how do you know her mom even kept it?”

“I don’t, but it’s worth a shot.”

“She could’ve sold it, Jon. Something like that is probably worth money.”

Jon rubbed a palm against his face and traced it through his hair. He knew he was on dangerous ground. The idea had struck him in the middle of the night a week prior as he was reviewing his itinerary and realized he’d be close to Charleston.

Jon told Missy she was right. Said he’d drop it.

He lied.

It was remarkably easy to locate the address. It seemed Dany’s mother was one of the rare species who still had a home phone and listed number. Though not out of the ordinary for a woman of her age, Jon still felt like it shouldn’t be _easy_ , like she should’ve been impossible to locate, gone into hiding.

In his attempt to navigate the roads of Mount Pleasant, he found himself completely turned around. As he finally pulled up in front of the house to which his GPS had brought him, he doubted its accuracy and double checked the address, unconvinced.

He couldn’t say what he was expecting, apart from the fact that this was not it. When he’d known Dany in college, he noticed early on that she had a taste for nice things, luxury items, even. It was that exact observation from Pyp while they were in London which birthed the long running _princess_ bit. Up until her confession the night before graduation, he assumed she’d grown off incredibly well off. After that night, though, his mind went in the exact opposite direction, assuming she’d grown up on modest means.

As Jon sat outside a rather impressive plantation style home on the waterfront, he again found himself at a loss for how he felt, unable to rectify the beauty before him with the ugly way Dany was raised.

Jon closed his eyes and allowed himself _one_ final pep talk.

_Just do it you asshole._

Before he talked himself out of it again, he forced his hand to the bell, pressing it probably a little bit too aggressively. The hard part done, he concentrated on his breaths, trying to keep them slow, despite his racing heart. As he started to wonder if anyone was home, the latch clicked and the door began to open.

Her eyes were kinder than he’d expected and he’d recognize that smile anywhere.

“You’re Jon?” Even her voice was similar.

“I am, it’s nice to meet you Mrs. Targaryen.” Jon extended his hand.

“Oh, please dispense with the formality here. Call me Rhaella.”

“Part of the job, tends to be a habit.” She smiled politely as she stepped into the doorway, extending her hand to invite him in. “Thank you.”

“I’ve got to say, Jon. You’re quite persistent. They’ve been trying to get us to consider solar panels for years.”

“The market’s exploding these days, if it wasn’t me, it would’ve been another.”

“I hope you aren’t coming expecting a sale, though. Even if I’m interested, I don’t think you’ll be able to convince my husband.”

That statement had Jon taken aback. “Oh, I’m sorry. I was under the impression it was just you.”

“Trying to have your way with an old broad, that it?” She smiled pleasantly at him.

He chuckled at that, looking away from her and running a hand through his hair. It alarmed him how likable she was. “I promise you, I’ve got nothing but honorable motives for being here. Got a finance, a three year old and a newborn at home.”

“My, my. You’re from Boston? Isn’t it uncommon for kids your age to be starting families in the northeast?”

“How old do you think I am?”

“Based on comparison to my step son, I’d say you’re about twenty eight?”

He flashed a grin. “Thirty.”

“I stand corrected.” She clasped her hands in front of her torso.

“It is true, though. We weren’t exactly planning for Audrey, my daughter, but I can’t imagine a life without her.”

“May I offer you something to drink?”

“A glass of water would actually be great. I’ve had a lot of appointments today.”

“Of course,” she smiled at him, “tap ok?”

“More than.”

“Ok, I hope you don't mind, but I’ll have to pour it from the bathroom faucet, the kitchen sink sprung a leak this morning and my husband didn't have time to fix it before he left for work.”

“Loose pipe?”

“I’m not quite sure.”

“You get me a glass and I’m happy to take a quick peak. There a wrench in there?”

“Oh, I couldn’t possibly trouble you.”

“The longer I’m with a client, the better it looks.” He smiled quickly and unbuttoned his cuffs, rolling them up and walking past her to the back, where he assumed the kitchen was located.

Once able to get under the pipes, Jon easily saw the problem. 

“I cannot tell you how much I appreciate your help. But I can’t say this is going to win you any favor with regards to us deciding to install solar panels.”

Jon twisted the wrench one last time and used the front of the cabinet to leverage himself forward. “No sweat. Just lucky this was one of the few handy things my dad taught me growing up.”

“You’ll need to pass my appreciation on to him when you get home.” She extended the glass of water in his direction.

After a long sip, he placed the glass on the counter. “Ah, thank you. My father actually passed several years back.”

Her hand immediately went to her heart, “oh, my. I am so sorry. I know how hard it is to lose a loved one so dear.”

He leaned backward against the counter, wiping his hands with the rag she’d given him. “I suppose it’s the way of life. Everyone’s going to have to say goodbye to a parent at some point.”

“And a spouse.” She added, sad.

“You’ve lost a spouse? I”m sorry to hear that. I can’t imagine if I lost Da—, my fiancé.”

“It is horrible. My first husband, he was a kind and gentle man. God, it was thirteen years this spring.” She looked out the window behind him, wistful. “This is not at all why you came here. I apologize. Here, you can mark up the house and let us know our savings now, it’s the least I can do.”

“It’s alright. I understand the feeling, my fiancé’s suffered a lot of loss too.”

“It’s hard to prepare yourself, let alone your child for such a thing.”

“I’d rather go before my children. I can’t imagine surviving them.” He was grateful she was steering the conversation in his intended direction. “You mentioned a stepson, do you have any other children?”

Her back straightened, just the way Dany’s did when she wanted to avoid a topic. “Just the boys my second husband, brought into my life. They’re great kids though.”

He pushed himself off the counter with haste, not in control of his body’s reaction to the statement. The rag dropped to the floor, he was immediately in search of his suit jacket. If he didn’t leave now, he was going to say some something he regretted.

“Jon? Are you ok?” Her voice echoed with concern.

He stopped, abrupt. His head curling slightly over his shoulder, hands in fists at his sides. He turned to face her, no longer seeing the kind woman who’d entertained him that afternoon. Before him stood a heartless old lady.

“I’m not here to sell you solar panels, Rhaella.”

Her brow furrowed in confusion. “What’s the meaning of this, then?”

“I’m from Boston. I’m thirty years old. I broker health insurance.”

“You want to sell me health insurance?”

Jon edged two steps closer to her. “No.”

“What is it then?”

Jon shook his head to the side, and angry laugh escaping him. “She can be just as obtuse as you.”

Rhaella’s mouth formed a wide “o,” before she quickly covered it. “I don’t know who you are, but—“

“I’m marrying your _daughter_. I’m the father to your _grandchildren._ ”

“You need to leave.”

“I’ll gladly do so. But first I want her music box.”

“You deceive me into inviting you into my home and now have the audacity to demand something from me?”

“It contained pictures. It contained a lock of her father’s hair she was given before he was taken away to be cremated.” 

“I don’t know who you think you are—“

He forged toward her, angrier than he’d been at anything in his recollected memory. “She was a fucking child,” he yelled, “she did nothing to you except exist and want for your love. Do you know how hard it is to be denied a love like that? I certainly don’t. God, I actually enjoyed your company. How can you be so pleasant to me, a stranger, yet completely deny the existence of your daughter?” 

Jon paused long enough to see tears streaming down her face.

“I _love_ her and I _hate_ her. I miss her every day and I never want to see her again.” She wiped at her tears, “it rips me apart every day. I know what I was to her, how I was. That’s why I sent her away. Her father had enough love for the both of us and once he was gone, I saw nothing but a horrible thing that had happened to me. I’m sure you love your children. Perhaps, even enjoy the recollection of the night of their conception. Maybe you remember that night fondly. How would you feel if you knew that your child was born of the worst thing that had ever happened to you? I brought her into this world. But I cannot look at her.”

Jon felt tears sting at his own eyes, “you’re disgusting,” he bit out, “I understand now why it took her four years to tell me. I want you to know that she is a better person at thirty than you’ll ever be in as many years as you live. If you’ll give me the music box, I’ll leave and you’ll never hear of or from us again.”

He knew it was possible, likely even, that she’d tossed or burned it, but he was going solely on hope at this point. Rhaella silently turned and ascended the stairs. He heard a door opening and the ruckus that goes with moving things around on a shelf. She returned with a small, ornately carved, wooden box, extending it to him, silent.

With a shrug, she said, “take it.”

He pulled it from her grasp, aggressive, as if she’d held his own long lost treasure in her hands. He turned to leave, found himself within arms reach of the front door and, before thinking the better of it turned, facing her. He held the box in one hand as his other went in for his breast pocket, ripping out the photo and holding it to her. “This will be the only photo you’ll ever see of Audrey, and the last you’ll see of myself or Dany.”

It wasn’t until the words left his mouth that he realized this was the first time her name had been spoken in the entirety of their meeting.

Jon slammed the car door shut and forced himself to take a few deep breaths in attempt to calm down. He couldn’t understand how someone so welcoming and kind to him had the capacity for such cruelty to her own daughter. He couldn’t imagine looking at Audrey and feeling anything but love and pride. Couldn’t even consider the idea of someday telling his son, who’d been given his own father’s namesake, to leave and never come back. 

The only thing he was more certain of was that Dany would sooner tell him to leave and never come back than allow her children to be mistreated in such a way.

His business in Charleston now concluded, both personally and professionally, he put the car in gear and set the GPS for the airport.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, Jon can't keep himself from meddling.
> 
> Still not sure on the total number of chapters, but I promise we're wrapping things up (as neatly as they're going to be wrapped up in this story, at least :)).
> 
> Thanks (as always) for chugging along on this ride with me and I hope everyone has a great week!
> 
> UPDATE: Sorry, I don't know if you're going to get two notifications of an update but I realized I neglected to give the biggest shoutout to feyaso, aka ice-and-fire-trash ([click here for more amazing work](https://ice-and-fire-trash.tumblr.com/)) for creating the Dany's profile picture from chapter 16! Thank you so much!!!
> 
> I hope the image comes through, because it is incredible!


	23. Only You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's song is Only You by Yaz:  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LIiyT67Sjbg
> 
> (Yes I've been waiting this entire story to use this song.

“Dany, the car’s been outside for almost ten minutes!” At Jon’s voice echoing up the stairs, Dany turned away from the mirror to Sansa as they shared an eye roll. Turning her attention back to her reflection, she refocused on getting the backing onto her earring. 

She stepped back and smoothed her hands along her sides, from waist to thighs. Admittedly, she felt a twinge of insecurity. In her early and mid twenties, she wouldn’t have batted an eyelash at the high hemline which ended barely mid-thigh. Self conscious, she leaned slightly forward and pulled at the seams on both sides before turning to Sansa.

“Do I look like I’m about to walk the corner?”

“I don’t think people walk the corner in four hundred dollar dresses.”

“How’d you know the price?” The embarrassment rained through Dany’s body. She’d justified the cost with the fact that she hadn’t splurged on anything for herself in eons and they _were_ celebrating tonight.

“Dany, I’m getting married in two and a half months, it’s basically my job to look at dresses all day, every day.” Sansa’s casual tone carried into her body as she leaned against the doorframe, hand snaking around to the wall in the hallway behind her. “Those fuchsia shoes though? He’s definitely going to recognize the red sole on those suckers, thanks to the two other pairs collecting dust in your closet.”

_Shit._ She hadn’t thought of that. “They weren’t full price.” Sansa raised a brow, “ok, they were having a twenty percent off thing when you spent a certain amount.” Dany paused, “but I mean look at them. They contrast the dress perfectly!”

Sansa leaned away from the doorway, half her body passing into the hall. “Don’t think I’m the one you have to convince.” She disappeared, leaving only a wink behind her.

Dany turned one final time to the large mirror leaned against the wall and examined her outfit. The dress was probably a little warm for this time of year, but she couldn’t pass it up. Powder blue lace sheathed over a nude slip which covered up to her neck and down both her arms. She’d even taken the time to curl her hair, the pieces from the front pulled in loose braids from either side of her face, and pinned at the back of her head. 

Not for nothing, but the shoes _did_ add the perfect pop of color to the muted tones in the dress. On her way out, she switched off the light and picked up her matching fuchsia clutch—which she’d paid less than ten dollars for—and closed the door behind her.

Before she reached the bottom of the stairs, she heard a whistle. “Ow, ow! That’s the princess I know and love.” She caught Pyp’s brotherly kiss on the cheeks and gave him a loose hug, before pulling her dress down again.

“Finally!” Jon’s voice itched with the slightest hint of irritation as he made his way from the kitchen, through the living room, to the foyer, Teddy in one arm with his face resting against a burp cloth on his shoulder; a beer in the other hand.

Dany pursed her lips together to stifle her laugh, “this is what responsible parenting looks like, right here.”

“And both are still intact, didn’t drop either!” He teased as Dany leaned in to him to pull Teddy from his embrace. As Jon walked away, he leaned his head back and poured the remnants of the bottle down his throat.

She nuzzled her son and tickled his belly as she peppered his face with kisses and elicited a happy giggle from him. He was so much like Audrey at this age.

“We really gotta go, even without traffic on 93, we’re cutting it close.”

Dany reluctantly released Teddy into the waiting arms of Sansa. “Where is Audrey?” Jon and Sansa exchanged a nervous glance. “Well, where is she?”

“She’s sitting on the floor in the kitchen. She’s not happy we’re leaving her for the night.”

“Get everything in the car, I’ll just be a minute.” She handed her clutch to Jon.

“Dany…”

“I know, I’ll be right out, I promise.”

She found Audrey leaned against the cabinet below the sink, arms crossed in front of her small body, her face red with tears. When she entered the room, the little girl huffed and turned her head to the side. If the sight didn’t break her heart so much, she’d want to laugh. She had _so much_ of her father in her.

Dany crouched down in front of her and gently wiped at her tear stained face, brushing her tangled hair from her eyes. “Are you sad daddy and I are leaving?”

“Can’t go.”

“You’re going to have so much fun with aunt Sansa and uncle Pyp.” Dany leaned in closer and whispered, “I even heard they’re going to let you eat popcorn in the living room while you watch a movie!” Dany made an excited face and covered her hand to her open mouth, in feigned surprise.

She could tell that her daughter’s interest was piqued, though she was trying to hide it.

“And maybe if you ask nicely, aunt Sansa will braid your hair the way you like.”

“You braid it.” Audrey huffed, but seemed to calm down.

Dany slid her hands under her daughter’s arms and rose, very carefully in her two inch heels, draping her chubby legs around her hips. She touched her nose to her Audrey’s, looking her in the eyes. “I love you, Audrey Grace. You're going to be good for Sansa and Pyp, right?” The little girl’s eyes darted downward. Dany raised her chin again. “Daddy and I will be home when you wake up in the morning. Just one sleep.”

Mercifully, Sansa walked into the kitchen at that moment and stood behind Dany. “Audrey, I was going to paint my nails but I need your help picking out a color.”

She leaned away from Dany, excited. “My toes?”

“Oh, I don’t know, only big girls can get their toes painted.”

“I’m big girl!” She squirmed in Dany’s arms. “Mommy, I’m big girl.”

Dany smiled at her, “that you are. Give me one last kiss and you can go play.”

Shutting the front door behind her, Dany noticed for the car for the first time. “Jesus, Jon.”

His wide smile bared his dimples. With a kiss on the cheek and a hand on her lower back, he directed her into the car. “What? We’re celebrating!”

“A limo though? Isn’t it a bit much?”

He quirked a brow at her. “A bit much? What’d you spend on your outfit tonight?”

“Oh, hey look! You brought a sparkling rosé!” Her voice was lighthearted as she leaned over him to pluck the bottle from the small cooler and handed him two flutes. As she attempted to move back, he wrapped the hand holding the glasses at her waist, pulling her to him and gently nibbling on her ear.

“Whatever it cost, it was worth every penny.” To accentuate his point, he ran his free hand up and down the inside of her thigh.

She turned to his face with a smile and gave him a brief peck on the lips before sliding away and working at the cork on the bottle. “I was worried I wasn’t going to be able to pull this off at the age of thirty one and after two kids.” The bottle popped and she poured its contents into the glasses Jon held up for her.

“Trust me, you are far more than just _pulling it off_.” She placed the bottle in the holder at her side and accepted a glass from Jon and raised it in his direction. “Happy _almost_ official five years.”

“Happy early birthday,” she countered.

“Happy late birthday.”

“Happy early Father’s day.”

“Happy belated Flag day?” They shared a laugh, clinked their glasses, and comfortably settled in for the ride.

The idea for tonight only came up the week before, when Jon returned home from his work trip with a bottle of Moet and the news that his firm had landed the client. They’d celebrated that night, but couldn't finish the bottle between the two of them, each exhausted for different reasons. It was then they’d realized neither could remember the last time they’d spent a night alone, aside from attending weddings.

They’d agreed on a night out, a date, mostly to celebrate their upcoming anniversary, but also just to celebrate in general. The hardest aspect was determining where to go. Dany initially wanted to go to one of the nice restaurants in their town or somewhere on the south shore. Jon was of the opinion that if they were _celebrating_ then they should go all out. After some coaxing, Dany agreed and they decided on the Top of the Hub, both surprised neither had been.

Jon reserved a table by the windows and Dany was mesmerized by the silhouette of the skyline as the sun set over the Charles. Boston really was a beautiful city. They shared a bottle of champagne, oysters, au gratin potatoes, and brussels sprouts. He had a steak and she ordered the scallops.

“It’s a good thing my commission’s increasing,” Jon joked when the bill came. When the waiter asked if they were interested in dessert, he’d waved him off before Dany could answer, telling her he had something else in mind.

As they walked out of the Pru and toward the limo, Dany felt a slight sting of embarrassment at the extravagance. Once settled on the cushioned seat, she leaned into Jon’s embrace and traced a hand along his thigh, slightly tipsy. “What do you have up your sleeve?”

He kissed the top of her head and ghosted his fingers along her arm. “You’ll just have to wait and see, won’t you?”

“Oh, I meant to tell you. Grey and Missy want to run the Fourth of July road race with us.”

“That means they’re staying over on the third?”

“I mean they probably won’t want to get up and drive from Rhode Island to get to the starting point before it starts at seven.”

“Even with the space in our house, we still don’t have room for everyone.”

“It’s tough being popular.” Dany nudged her elbow into his stomach.

When she moved to Boston in 2010, Dany quickly realized that the Fourth was easily the city’s favorite holiday (unless you counted St. Patrick’s day _in Southie_ , which she didn’t). Several times in their tenure living in Somerville, they’d gone to the Esplanade to watch the Boston Pops perform and gawk at the fireworks. The weeks before the holiday had almost every town surrounding the city also hosting their own fireworks displays.

The year prior, when they’d bought their house, she was pleasantly surprised to learn that their new hometown took the Fourth very seriously; hosting not only fireworks, but a road race and parade through downtown. She’d wanted to invite everyone to their house for it, but they’d only moved in a few weeks before and were in no shape to be hosting such a holiday.

This year, though, they were going all out. Running the race in the morning, watching the parade, hosting a brunch afterward, then planning on heading to the neighborhood private beach for a little while before a cookout, and topping it off watching the Boston fireworks, which they’d learned were visible from their porch.

To say Dany was excited would be an understatement.

Lost in thought, Dany hadn’t noticed the car heading in the opposite direction of home, getting off the highway at exit 29, hadn’t realized they’d gone around a familiar rotary. It wasn’t until they made a turn by Tufts that she realized where they were. 

“Are we going to the old apartment?”

“Nothing gets past you.” Jon teased, moving his arm to drape over her shoulder and pull her closer to him.

“What about Sansa and Pyp?”

“Don’t worry about it.” He gave her arm a one-two squeeze as the driver opened the door. He took her hand and lead her up the creaky staircase and pulled a key from his pocket to unlock the door. It looked so different yet exactly the same.

“It’s still just as hot.” She pulled down on his hand and leaned her chin on his shoulder, kicking the door behind them closed. “Do they know we’re here?”

“Nah, I thought we could break in and steal some stuff.”

“Ha-ha.”

“Yes, the one rule is that we sleep in the spare room.” He smirked, “which is actually our old room. For some reason Sansa didn’t want to share the same room her brother had already had sex in. Go figure.” He shrugged playfully. “Well, that, or the fact that the other room is bigger.”

“Sleep?” Dany questioned, ignoring his other comments. “Jon, all I have is,” she held an index finder in the air in front of her and traced it up and down, “this.”

“Ye of little faith.” He walked to the bedroom and switched on the light, two bags on the bed came into view.

“What! When did you have time to do this?” She looked into the bags to find pajamas and clothes for the next day. “I promised Audrey we’d be there when she woke up.”

“Trust me, with what Sansa has in store, she won’t notice.” He ran his hands up her thighs, resting them on her backside and giving a firm squeeze. “Besides, I’ve got _plans_ for you tonight.”

“Oh?” She wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling his forehead to hers and pressing a light kiss on his lips.

He drew slightly back, moving his hands to her hips. “But more on that later.” He slid from her embrace and took her hand, leading her back to the kitchen. “We’re having dessert here.” He pointed to the fridge. 

Curious, she pulled the handle on the door and peeked inside; the sight filling her with glee. “Union Square doughnuts? Please tell me they’re maple bacon?” She asked, reaching for the box.

When they’d lived in the city, a Sunday morning ritual of theirs was for Jon to get up early and run to grab these very doughnuts.

“Better than an expensive tiramisu?”

Her mouth full of food and unable to speak, she nodded furiously, broke off a piece, and fed it to him. 

“I’ve got one more surprise for you.” He nodded to a wrapped box on the counter. 

“I didn’t get you anything though! That’s not fair!” She pouted, half serious.

“That’s where Audrey gets it from.”

She chuckled and bit her lip, her gaze on the floor before drawing up to him. “I was thinking the same thing about you when I said goodbye to her earlier.”

“It’s like she’s got both of us in her or something.” He teased.

“Or something.” She pushed him away and reached for the box. It was _heavy_. “What, you smuggling anvils in here or something?” She pulled at the ribbon but he covered her hands with his. Curious she twirled her head to the side to meet his gaze.

“I’m taking a gamble on this. There’s a 50/50 chance you’re going to love or hate this.”

She gave him an exaggerated eye roll and pushed his hands aside, “after everything we’ve been through, after what you’ve done tonight, I’m sure I’m going to love it.”

“We’ll see about that.”

She gave him a tenuous side-eye and returned her attention to the task at hand. There was no paper on the box, just the ribbon. That removed, she peeled the cover off and pushed aside the tissue paper.

At sight of the contents, her body drew away, not stopping until she came in contact with the counter on the other side of the kitchen. Her hand lightly covered her gaping mouth as tears pooled in her eyes and her breath and heartbeat accelerated. The initial astonishment waning enough for her to catch sight of him.

She could see that her reaction had left him apprehensive, unsure whether he’d done something wonderful or made a tremendous misstep.

“Jon.” Her hand went to her heart as tears intermittently fell from her eyes, “ _Jon_.”

He took several steps forward, but left an arm’s length between them.

“How?”

A smile passed briefly across his lips, almost curt. As if he was waiting for this. His eyes closed and his head turned slightly down. He was nervous.

“That’s the part you’re not going to like.”

Though she’d anticipated this as his answer, she felt overcome by the revelation.

“You went to my house?” _How could he even have found it?_

“I know how much it meant to you. The new client had a satellite office in Charleston that we needed to visit, put in face time with. I,” he closed the remaining space and took her hands in his. “Dany, I can’t imagine all the things you went through before you made your way to me, and I know that’s a hard part of your past that you hate to revisit, but I needed to give you something. Needed a way to show you that I’m all in. More than just the ring. Everyone gets a ring.”

“You met my mother.”

“I did.” She could feel the question on her face, “I don’t know how you came out of something like that.”

“Did you tell her about Audrey and Teddy?”

He looked reluctant to answer. “I did.”

She smiled to herself, tempted to laugh at the irony. “And of course that didn’t matter.”

“Dany, I didn’t mean to reopen old wounds. I just…”

“I bet she was nice to you at first. She’s a real people person. Well liked by everyone in the community. She’s kind and giving to everyone. Except me.”

She’d tried not to think on it much, the subject of her mother. She was human, though. In her heart of hearts, she’d always thought if her mother knew about her grandchildren, she’d see the error in her actions. Despite her own well constructed walls, and as a mother herself, she had a difficult time being away from her children for a day or two, she couldn’t fathom going thirteen years. _Thirteen years._ As a daughter, she wanted a mother who loved her the way she loved her children. Dany knew that she’d be willing to forgive her mother; all she had to do was ask.

But Dany had known the hard truth for a long time. Rhaella was never going to ask. 

“I’m sorry, I should’ve listened to Missy.”

A sad, half smile crossed her face as something pulled at her heart. “You talked to Missy about this?”

“She told me it was a bad idea. Terrible actually. Told me to leave it be. But obviously I didn’t; couldn’t.”

His eyes were searching hers, attempting desperately to gauge her reaction. She placed a hand on his chest and grazed her lips against the corner of his mouth, silent, before detangling from his embrace and finding herself on the other side of the room, the box to her right, facing him.

She focused her attention on her hands, wrung and twisting in front of her. After a time, she breathed deeply and looked up. She knew she was crying, harder than before. The look on his face, sad, disappointed, broke her heart.

“I’m not upset.” Her voice echoing in the kitchen startled her, they’d be silent for so many minutes. “I mean, I _am_ upset, but not at you.” She searched for the words, “I don’t know what to say, honestly. It does bring up some unpleasant memories, but also so many fond ones.” She leaned over to look into the box, ran her fingers over the ornate carvings made by her father’s own hand. “It’s been so long since I’ve seen it, I wasn’t sure I remembered it right.” She turned her head to him, fresh tears in her eyes. “But it’s just as I recalled, better even.”

She pulled the music box out and onto the counter. As she lifted the lid a familiar lullaby started to play and her eyes scoured the contents she hadn’t seen in so long. “ _Oh!_ ”

Her attention focused, she hadn’t noticed him cross the room until his arms wrapped around her and his lips breezed her temple. As she leaned into his embrace, his arms moved from her waist to her shoulders, pulling her closer.

“You wanna see him?”

“Absolutely.”

She pulled the first picture she could get her hands on, both ecstatic and overwhelmed with so many options. She held it low so he could see it over her shoulder.

It was a photo from her sixteenth birthday, with her freckle faced and front and center, eyes closed as she blew out the candles. Her father stood behind her, grey haired and making a silly face, sticking out his tongue, and giving her bunny ears.

“He was such a goofball. His favorite insult was _doofus_ ,” she laughed at the memory, “probably because he _was_ one.”

Though it was already past eleven when she’d opened the gift, they spent the better part of the next two hours scouring through the photos with Dany explaining how they came to be and telling stories she’d nearly forgotten over the years. 

Just after one in the morning, when Jon reached for another pile of photos, her hand went to his forearm. “No more tonight.”

“You sure?”

“I want to save some. I don’t want to waste them all tonight.” 

He nodded in understanding and slid back, his arm around her as she leaned into his chest, his shirt long since untucked and his tie discarded.

She was happy, she felt _almost_ whole again.

Curling her legs under herself, she kneeled and gently turned his face in her direction. “Jon, I don’t know how to thank you for this. Of anything you— _anyone_ — has ever or could ever give me, this is the absolute best.”

He mirrored her gesture, placing his hand on the side of her face, thumb drawing soft circles on her cheek. “That, Dany, right there, is all the thanks I need. Watching you with this tonight, hearing these stories, that alone makes it all worth it.”

“So,” she traced her hands along his shoulders and pulled at his collar.

“So.” He smiled bright and wiggled his eyebrows at her.

“You wanna get married?”

“Now?” He teased.

“Not now, but soon. I think I’m ready. I think we’re ready.” His hands found the small of her back. “Besides, one of our children shouldn’t be born out of wedlock. Maybe we follow the rules, for once.”

“Something you’d like to tell me?” He pulled her so she was straddling his lap.

“With the amount of alcohol I’ve had tonight? Definitely not.” She gently bit at his ear, “but I think we have one more in us.”

“Oh, _at least_. And practice is vital.” He hissed as she gently sucked at his neck.

“Well, let’s get to it then.” She stood, barefoot, and pulled him up, taking his hand and leading him through the open bedroom door, which he kicked firmly shut behind them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First, I gotta give another giant shout out to the amazing ice-and-fire-trash for this scene come to life she created from Missy and Grey’s wedding. I can’t stop looking at it and it’s everything I want it to be: https://ice-and-fire-trash.tumblr.com/image/170561908835
> 
> I can’t figure out how to imbed an image, but click the link!
> 
> I don’t have much to say after this one, except thank you so much to all of you readers! Your love and passion for and about this story is remarkable and makes me smile gleefully at random points in my day.
> 
> Also, biggest of shout-outs to InBuccaAlLupo for helping to inspire and helping me to get this one out. I heeded your advice in everything but the chapter's song... xx


	24. You'll Accomp'ny Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter's song is You'll Accomp'ny Me, by Bob Seger:  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uM7FWzOIIRI

A throbbing in her head pulled her from a dreamless sleep. 

Cradling her forehead in her palm, Dany let out a low, closed mouth moan. Willing her eyes to stay shut in hopes the pain would subside, she lay motionless for a few moments. Surrendering to the pain, she reached to the side of the bed, where her desk was, in hopes the full bottle of ibuprofen hadn’t been moved in her drunken antics the evening before.

Except her hand met nothing but empty air. Momentarily startled, her eyes opened as her palm hit the pillow behind her, bracing herself she sat up. There was a loud crunch as she registered her fingers pressing against paper, but the thought was discarded as she immediately realized this was _not_ her room. It was another few seconds until she realized she was completely naked and pulled the blankets around her torso.

_Why was she alone?_

Face draped into her knees, an image of dark eyes and darker hair flashed behind her closed lids.

_His name was Jon and he grew up near Boston and had really cute dimples and was terrible at flip cup._

Her eyes scanned the room, picking up details she hadn’t noticed in the dark the night before. From the Dave Matthews, 311, and Fight Club posters to the painfully neat open closet, to the impressively sized television, halting at the mini-fridge, microwave, and toaster. There was also, somehow, floating shelves which contained more easy mac, oatmeal, ramen, and cereal than she had seen outside of a grocery store.

She was unable to suss out if the room was bigger than hers or if it just felt that way because it housed half the furniture. _Must be nice to have a single,_ she thought, locating her discarded clothes in a rumpled pile not far from the bed.

Last night she’d allowed herself to imagine they’d have a future, but in the light of day, truth chipped away at that delusion. He was well adjusted and normal; his parents clearly put a great deal of care setting up a path to a successful future for him. She’d likely be viewed by them as broken, dead weight, dragging behind and holding him back. If this continued, he’d run from the baggage she carried, knowing she didn’t deserve him or anything he had to offer.

She didn’t deserve to be loved, as her mother had told her just a few weeks ago.

Her head pounded harder when she stood, reminding her how dehydrated she was. But standing also brought a new sensation; a soreness, an ache, _down there_.

Ignoring that for the time being, Dany quickly dressed and let herself out, beginning the walk of shame to her dorm and completely missing the hastily scrawled note on the pillow next to her.

Her first instincts upon finding herself back in her own room were to peel off her ‘going out’ clothes from the evening before, a pair of hip hugging flares and ribbed tank top with glitter and rhinestone embezzling.

Turning the shower nozzle as far into the hot zone as possible, she stepped back, closed her eyes, and welcomed the harsh avalanche of hard water raining down her body. It was when she began running her loofa along her body that she realized she was sore in _other places_ too and finally assessed her body.

Small bruises of brown and blue marked a path across her chest and along her thighs.

____________________________________________________________________________

She pulled at his dark curls, unsure of whether she was asking him to stop or urging him on. He seemed to take it as an indication to surge ahead, doing something sinful with his mouth and eliciting sensations she’d never felt and which made her toes curl.

Sufficiently pleased with himself, he used that mouth of his to make his way back up her body.

“You’ve done that before?” She asked, breathless.

“Just once, there was this girl in high school…” His eyes darting, face sheepish.

“No need for details.”

“Sorry.”

“Trust me, you have nothing to be sorry for.” She smiled up at him as she snaked her legs around his hips, drawing him closer to her.

He let out a hiss and pushed himself up, “Dany, I don’t think this is a good idea.”

“No?” She gyrated her hips just so.

“I’ve never…”

“Me either.”

“Really?”

In reply, she pulled his face down to meet hers in a fierce kiss. “Really. But if what you just did there is any indication, I think it’s the best idea I’ve ever had.”

Convinced, his hand ran down her body to the curve under her knee, thumb drawing circles in the flesh of her thigh. The gentleness of the gesture contradicted the illicit ministrations of his tongue against hers.

____________________________________________________________________________

 

“So, how’d it go with Jon last night?” Missy probed, wiggling her eyebrows at Dany the moment she returned from the shower.

Dany closed her eyes to gather her bearings and was immediately assaulted with more explicit memories of their late night activities.

At Dany’s non-responsiveness, she continued. “I hope you’re not upset I let you go home with him. You insisted it would be fine and you were basically attached at the hip for the majority of the party.”

 

____________________________________________________________________________

“One time, my brother, my best friend Pyp, and I went to the parking lot of a grocery store and stole a shopping cart. Put it right in the trunk of Pyp’s old station wagon. We thought we were hilarious and joked about pushing each other through the drive through with it. But in actuality it ended up in Pyp’s basement until his dad found it and returned it.” He smiled to himself at the memory and placed a gentle hand on her arm as he continued, “and oh man was Pyp’s dad _pissed_ , he was grounded for a week.”

She’d just told him about the first time she got drunk, after the homecoming dance sophomore year of high school with a few girlfriends in someone’s basement. He’d teased that she was such a rebel and she’d countered by asking what kind of trouble he got into in high school. 

She wanted to tell him that his youthful act of defiance hardly one upped hers, but she was too distracted by the fire on her arm left by his brief contact. By the way his whole face scrunched up when he smiled. By the way he looked at her, like he _saw_ her.

She didn’t expect to have fun tonight. Missy, her roommate and almost immediate best friend, had dragged her to a welcome back party. She’d insisted it’d be fun, one of the hosts was an acquaintance from home and she’d introduce them. He was supposed to be very cute, looked like a bad boy but had the heart of a teddy bear.

As it so happened, bad boy teddy bear wasn’t around and Dany wasn’t unhappy about it.

“Hey,” Missy’s voice yelled from behind Dany, over the thumping bass of 50 Cent’s ‘In Da Club,’  
“I’m gonna head to grab a slice of pizza from Antonio’s with some people before the rush. You interested?” 

_It was tempting._

“Um,” her eyes darted back to Jon, brows raised in question. 

He smiled and downed the remaining beer from his solo cup before discarding it on the bookshelf behind them. “I could go for a slice of chicken quesadilla pizza right now.”

On the walk over, he’d taken her hand. She couldn’t remember when, exactly; one minute they were walking side by side and giggling, the next his fingers were laced with hers.

When Jon opened the door and gestured she and Missy go ahead of him, Missy nudged an elbow into her side. Dany met her friend’s suggestive gaze with raised brow and bit back a smile at his endearing chivalry.

Having underestimated the time the late night rush began, they had ample time to evaluate the variety of pizza from which they had to choose. When annoyed employee asked for their orders, Jon stepped forward, turning to her and Missy, “Whaddaya want?” They both ordered a slice of chicken quesadilla.

When it came time to pay, Jon handed back their slices and pulled out his wallet, gesturing for them to head outside.

He joined them a few minutes later, greasy paper plate in one hand, folded slice in his other, already half eaten. Dany slid down the bench to make room for him next to her.

They ate mostly in silence, observing the drunk, of age, students stumbling into Antonio’s, trying to hail cabs, couples kissing and others fighting. The air of the early September night was warm on their skin and lacked the oppressive humidity that had hung in the air the previous week.

That was the thing about New England, Missy had told her as they walked to dining hall earlier in the week, it would be eighty degrees and humid as hell and then one day it would just stop and you’d need a jacket and scarf. There was no _easing_ into the seasons here.

Dany welcomed the change.

Missy was engaged in some drunken deep life conversation with a girl she’d met at the party, sharing a cigarette and giggling. Jon had leaned forward, elbows to his knees and hands clasped between. He was trying to be sly about it, but she could see him stealing glances in her direction.

“Dany,” Missy’s slurred speech drew her from her reverie, “we’re gonna head back and have some of the goldschlager in my fridge. You wanna come?”

“I don’t think I should drink anymore, actually.”

“We were also gonna put on comedy central to catch the rerun of The Daily Show from Thursday.” 

“I’m not sure I’m ready to head back yet.” _Come on, Jon._

“I’ll hang with you a bit and I can walk you back.”

“Sure!” She internally cringed at how quickly she’d agreed.

“You sure you want to do that?” She hadn’t know Missy long, but her friend had already displayed how fiercely loyal and protective she was.

“Yes, I’m sure. You guys go, have a shot for me.”

Missy winked in reply and tugged the other girl’s arm before they stumbled away.

“Man, I really wanted to go to UMass.” Jon leaned back and stretched his arm on the bench behind her.

Dany angled herself to face him, “so why didn’t you?”

He shrugged, “I got into Amherst.”

“So? I’d think your parents would’ve preferred in-state tuition at a state school over one of the Little Ivies.”

Jon chuckled at that. “My dad grew up in South Boston in the sixties, his family had nothing. He pulled sixteen hour days to pay his way through college, first of his family to attend. My parents…expected a lot of us kids, academically. They gave us every advantage they could so that we wouldn’t have to go through what they did. We were better than a _state school._ ”

“Well, bless your little heart. That sounds like a tough life.” Dany teased, bumping her shoulder against his. 

“Ugh, the worst,” he mocked. “It’s not all bad, though. I mean, the view from Memorial Hill?” He whistled and shook his head.

“I haven’t seen it yet.”

“What!” His eyes were wide and his voice incredulous, “how is that possible? The campus isn’t that big!”

“I dunno.” She shrugged.

“Well, we’re fixing that right now.” He grasped her hand again and tugged her from the bench.

In their trek across campus, they encountered not even a dozen students before they entered the vacant patio overlooking Memorial Hill. 

The only illumination came from the amber glow of the sporadic lights that graced the courtyard behind them and the twinkling stars shining in the clear sky above, the moon having set hours before. Dany could make out the sight before her only in varying shades of black, yet her breath was still taken away.

“The view’s even better in daylight.” He paused, “but there’s more people milling about.”

“Six of one, half a dozen of the other, right?”

“Exactly.”

He was looking at her again, looking at her in a way that made it difficult to hold his gaze. Looking at her as if she wasn’t broken. She wasn’t sure if it was the gentle breeze that filtered up from the trees below or his gaze, but goosebumps prickled across her skin and elicited a shiver which started at her spine and reverberated through her body.

Her hair, which had begun the evening perfectly straight, had gotten wavy somewhere along the way. The gusts of wind did nothing to help the matter, twisting and tangling and creating knots she’d had to deal with the next day.

Noticing her chill, he ran his warm hands up and down her cool arms. “Sorry, I’ve got nothing to offer you but this. Didn’t think I’d need a jacket tonight.”

_He was so close._

“Guess I shouldn’t have gone out in just a tank top. I’m still getting used to dressing for the weather here.” She gave a half smile and bit at her bottom lip, catching his gaze for the briefest of seconds before adding, “besides, it’s the thought that counts, right?”

Without warning, his hands were at her waist, pulling her to him, lips meeting hers with a spark of electricity. He pulled back, breaking the kiss as it had barely begun, eyes searching hers for permission but also carrying that _look again_. He wasn’t just another guy trying to score.

The air between them felt heavy with potential. Potential for beyond this one night. It felt comfortable and above all it felt _right_. Right in a way she’d never felt before.

_And it terrified her._

He didn’t know her, was unaware of what she came from. He hadn’t yet learned that she didn’t deserve to be _looked at_ like that.

She knew she should run, leave him before he found her out, before the wound in her heart grew deeper. But her inhibitions were lowered thanks to the alcohol and without thinking it through, she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him back to her.

____________________________________________________________________________

 

“You gonna tell me what happened or just stand there with starry eyes?”

Dany cleared her throat and resumed running her brush through her tangled tresses. “Sorry, it was fun. He’s fun.”

“Fun? Are we seeing fun Jon again?”

“I mean, I’m sure I’ll see him around campus.”

“What? Girl, when I left it looked like you two were about to sign the deed on a house together!”

Dany opened the closet door and changed into a pair of jeans and a tank top. “He’s a nice guy, but it seems like he’s looking for something serious, and I’m not ready to be tied down yet.” She hung her damp towel on top of the door and left it open a crack.

“The way you were looking at him last night would imply otherwise.”

Dany pulled her favorite zip up sweater from her desk chair and slipped it on. As she spotted the card box which passed for her jewelry box these days, she realized she’d left her favorite hoop earrings on Jon’s night table. “Dammit!”

“Something wrong?”

Deciding it would just lead to further inquisition, Dany dismissed Missy with a wave. “Nothing. Breakfast? I’m dying for a waffle smothered in butter and syrup with a side of homefries.”

“Definitely.” Missy stood, grabbing her wallet and slipping into her flip flops.

“It’s totally fine if you need a minute to change.”

Missy rolled her eyes and opened their door, “spare me that. You’re the only one who refuses to leave the dorm in anything less than jeans.”

“I wasn’t—“

“Oh you absolutely were! You’re lucky I love you.” Missy slipped her wallet and phone into the pouch of her sweatshirt. “I’m gonna figure out what you’re hiding behind that cool facade, Daenerys Targaryen.”

____________________________________________________________________________

“Come on, you gotta tell me, there’s no way that’s your natural hair color.”

Dany wiggled her nose and stuck her tongue out at her roommate in the mirror as she unclipped the last layer of hair from the top of her head and began running the straightener through it. “All I use is a purple shimmer shampoo to keep it bright and protect it from turning yellow thanks to the hard water here.”

“Real or fake, Drogo is gonna lose his mind when he sees you.”

Dany turned, “I don’t understand your obsession with getting us together. I don’t know a single thing about him and I’m pretty sure he knows less about me.”

Missy handed her a shot, “I dunno. I just have a feeling about you two.” They clinked glasses and took their respective drinks, which Missy chased with a beer and Dany orange juice.

Cringing at the burning liquid as it ran down her throat, Dany challenged. “You said you _kinda knew him_. When did this transform into, you know what kinda girl he likes?”

“He was friends with my sister’s boyfriend.”

“Well, let’s get this over with, then.” Dany unplugged the straightener and ran her hands through her hair. No matter how hard she tried, the ends always curled in; her hair would never be as pin straight as in the magazines.

“You should bring a jacket or something.”

“What? It’s like almost eighty out.” She ignored Missy’s knowing smile.

“Alright, well here, one for the road.”

“You mixed,” Dany inspected the bottle, “raspberry lime seltzer with goldschlager?”

“Did the best I could with what I had, my dear. Now let’s get to getting.” Missy ushered her out the door.

Despite her initial repulsion, Dany found herself almost enjoying Missy’s concoction and was able to finish it before they made it to the party.

“Hi,” Dany smiled at two guys standing on the porch, holding beers in their hands.

“Hi. Five dollars.”

“Oh, we know Drogo.” Missy flashed a smile.

“That’s nice, Drogo’s not here. Five bucks gets you into the party and a keg cup.”

“What? He’s supposed to be here, he invited us.”

“Don’t know what to tell ya, doll face. He ain’t here. Now you can pay and enter, or not and leave.”

“Missy it’s fine, here,” Dany handed the guy a ten and received two red solo cups in return.

Missy’s eyes threw daggers at the guys as she passed, but she accepted the cup Dany handed her and pushed the door open. Chingy’s ‘Right Thurr’ immediately assaulted their ear drums.

They easily found the keg and filled their cups to the brim, Dany grudgingly resigning herself to the fact that she would be forced to drink beer.

Missy easily made friends with the group of people seated around a table in the kitchen playing kings, decrying she and Dany would join in once this game was finished.

Waiting their turn, Dany scanned the room, not recognizing a single person. She wasn’t sure what she expected, she’d been here just a week. Bracing herself, she closed her eyes and swallowed the foul alcohol. When she opened her eyes, she caught sight of a guy leaned against the door frame, chuckling at her. He wore a nicely fitted grey v-neck shirt over jeans, dark curls fell at his forehead. His amused smile lit up his whole face.

“Jon!” Someone tapped him on the shoulder and hooked a thumb toward the front of the house. He nodded and turned back before he left, raising his cup in the air to her, which she returned with a tight smile before he disappeared.

“Dany! We’re in.” Missy patted an empty chair.

“So, everyone familiar with the house rules?” The bro-looking dealer asking the question wore a backwards Red Sox hat and a co-ed naked volleyball shirt.

“Why don’t you go over it, just to be safe.” Missy suggested.

“Ugh, freshmen.” He groaned as he shuffled the deck. “two is you, three is me, four is floor, five is chicks, six is dicks, seven is heaven, eight pick a date, nine bust a rhyme, ten is categories, jack is back, queen’s question, king is social, and ace is waterfall. We good?”

Dany raised her brows at Missy, who winked in return and reached for a card.

After two games, Dany was sure she’d imbibed more beer than she’d ever had, feeling bloated and looking for a reprieve from this game.

“Yooo!” Boomed another nondescript male wearing a Celtics hat, “we’re getting started on flip cup in the other room. BYO solo cup and join the fun. Unless you can’t flip a cup, in which case, don’t.”

Jumping at the opportunity to stretch her legs, Dany tapped Missy on the shoulder and pointed, “you interested?”

“Nah, I’m good here. You go. Have fun. Be reckless!”

She had to wait a few rounds to join the game, they were playing something called survivor flip cup, which she’d not yet familiarized herself with.

“Alright, blondie, you’re in.” Celtics hat pointed to the empty spot diagonally across the table. “You’re up first. Down up, down, drink. We ready?”

Finding nothing but more beer, Dany pound a small amount into her cup and braced herself. It wasn’t until she cheersed the cup across from her that she realized it was him, dark haired v-neck. He winked at her before tapping his cup on the table and guzzling the liquid.

“Blondie, let’s go!” Startled, she sipped the beer, dropping the cup to the table before she’d even swallowed, and flipped the cup in one try, as v-neck still struggled, aiming his flip just a little too high. Her team finished just as the rim of his cup finally hit the table. She met his dejected stare with a wink.

“Alright, Stark. You’re out.” His apparent team captain yelled.

Though she found herself disappointed to watch him go, she found herself enjoying the game, even despite its main objective being to sling back beer. Her teammates dubbed her a “one-touch princess,” which she took as a compliment.

When someone went to restock the beer and never returned, the players dwindled and Dany decided to find Missy or more alcohol. Luckily, one precipitated the other, her roommate standing in the kitchen swigging from a bottle of cheap vodka. “Dany! Come join us! We found this in the cabinet!” 

Taking the bottle, she pressed it to her lips and poured the liquid down her throat for a few seconds, only to find herself gagging when she finished. “Good god, what the fuck? What guys drink raspberry vodka?” She’d had an incident at a friend’s house during midterms which involved a lot of raspberry vodka and plain water and lead to the worst hangover she’d had to date.

Feeling the room start to close in and needing a respite from the thumping bass and the body heat, Dany excused herself to the porch, hoping fresh air would stop the room from spinning. Noticing the drastic difference in temperature from inside, she opted to veer right and collapse on the empty, worn couch as opposed to join the gathering of people milling about to her left. She leaned her head against the back cushion and closed her eyes to collect herself, forcing herself not to consider what kind of seedy stains she was being exposed to.

After a moment, she lifted her head, beginning to feel better. She chanced a look at the other side of the porch and there he was again, leaned leisurely against bannister, one hand tucked in his front pocket, engaged in some kind of conversation which kept bringing that laughing smile to his face.

When he noticed her, mid-sentence, he paused and did a double take. Unsure of what to do, she raised her cup. He inhaled a laugh, returned the gesture, and resumed his conversation. She pulled out her phone and flipped it open. No missed calls or text messages. Though that wasn’t surprising, she still found herself disappointed.

With a sigh, she pushed herself up on the arm of the couch and was about to make her way back inside to tell Missy she was leaving, when she realized v-neck was the only other person on the porch with her. He must’ve read the question on her face because he gave her an impish grin, raised his eyebrows, and lifted his hands as he shrugged.

Dany debated for a minute before striding to him. _Fuck it._

She extended a hand, “Hi, I’m Dany. You’ve been eyefucking the shit out of me all night.”

His face turned down as a laugh rumbled through his body. “I like you already.” He grasped her hand, firm. “Jon.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I cannot tell you how many times I had to bite my tongue when you all kept asking me if we were gonna see how they met and their first time.
> 
> The construction of the story was intended for the past chapters to *mostly* be heading backwards while the present chapters were heading forwards so that we end where their story begins.
> 
> I know a few folks were keen to seeing their wedding…but that felt to fairytale-ish for me and for these characters. Also, in my mind, their story doesn’t end there, so I felt it needed to remain open ended.
> 
> I may drop in with one-offs set in this universe, but for now I need a break from the brutal process that is writing for me.
> 
> I want to express, from the bottom of my heart, how much the support, kind words of encouragement, and of course the constructive feedback has meant to me. This site really is geared toward making writers and our little Jonerys community flourish.
> 
> It has been a pleasure sharing this with and getting to know all of you.
> 
> Now that the story’s complete, I’m also happy to answer any lingering questions you may have, so send them my way on here or tumblr.
> 
> I cannot express the gratitude upon gratitude upon gratitude that I have for InBocaAlLupo. What started as “hey, I’m doing this thing, want to read it? “ transitioned into “i just posted a chapter, let me know what you think?” and morphed into “here’s what i wrote, what do you think?” From simple copyediting to fixing my innumerable comma splices to gently telling me that perhaps a few tweaks were necessary so that readers actually understood what I was trying to convey. <3
> 
> Finally, one last shout-out to @ice-and-fire-trash for the incredible art! The images you created were so close to what I imagined as I was writing and it warmed my heart so much that you captured the feelings! 
> 
> And…that’s a wrap.
> 
> Infinite X’s and O’s,  
> RLD


End file.
